3% Man Success Story: From Beta Friend-Zoned Guy To An Effortless Relationship

How to go from the beta who gets friend-zoned to the guy who gets the girl.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer from the UK who shares a success story of how he went from being the beta friend-zoned guy into an effortless relationship with a hot girl 10 years younger than him. He talks about all the practice he had dating different women and how it all came together effortlessly when he met his now current girlfriend. He hopes his story inspires others. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “3% Man Success Story: From Beta Friend-Zoned Guy To An Effortless Relationship”.

Well, when I read this email, it reminds me of the way I once was. And I think probably the majority of guys that are watching this have had similar experiences, where like this particular guy, he’d get 1 or 2 dates and then it would just completely fade away. And so this guy is actually from the UK. And what really did it for him was he became friends with this girl for many months, thinking, “Hey, she’ll see what a great guy I am.”

And then eventually told her that he wanted to date her. But she’s like, “Well, I just think of you as a friend.” And he felt awful. And then that’s when he started seeking out videos on friendship and friend zone, how to get out of the friend zone. That kind of thing. He came across my work. And so he really goes into detail on the process that he went through reading 3% Man, applying it, implementing it, doing different repetitions with different women.

I think he said he dated 20 different women over the course of about a year, and about 4 or 5 of them he really liked. So for those of you that are new or maybe are struggling, this guy writes in sharing a lot of detail because he just hopes to inspire other people because he just got to the point, just like I did when I was younger, where you go out on dates and you know that the girl was into you and then you just see her interest fade, you can’t ever figure out why.

If you ask her, she gives you explanations that make absolutely zero sense and are not helpful in any way, shape, or form to help you become better and overcome it. So we have to remember that traction is not a choice. Mother Nature has already handled that for us. However, most of us guys that don’t know any better start acting in a very unattractive ways.

We say and we do things that just turn the women off and they go from being really attracted to us, to us basically eliciting nothing more than platonic friendship vibes in them towards us. Which when you’re interested in sex and romance, that’s suboptimal.

So let’s go through his email.

Viewer Email:

Hi Corey, 

I am from England and I am someone who went from struggling with women and chasing them into rejection, to having a beautiful effortless relationship with a woman who is obsessed with me, and it’s thanks to your work and 3% man. I want to share my story with you, hopefully it inspires other people in your audience. 

Well, before I start, if you’re new and you haven’t read 3% Man, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, put your name, put your email address in the little email sign up box, create a password. And the book will open up right in your web browser. Even if you think I’m totally full of crap, if you apply what’s in my book, you’re going to get way better results than you’ll get on your own. And at the end of the day, it’s free to read. You have nothing to lose. And then once you see how well it works, then go buy an audiobook or paperback or this is a nice hardcover version as well.

Part 1. Before.

I was a guy in my late twenties/early thirties struggling with women. I’m not tall but women told me they found me cute and I never had any problem getting dates, but I usually couldn’t maintain attraction past the first or second date and I never understood why.

Yeah. And then you think, well, common sense would say, “Well, just ask the women and they’ll tell you.” But they give you explanations because they’re again, women don’t understand how attraction works and they’re trying not to hurt your feelings.

Now I know it’s because I texted and pursued too much. A few years ago I met a beautiful girl at work. There was definitely some interest in the beginning, but I spent months having coffees and lunches with her at work before working up the courage to ask her out.

So keep in mind when you do that, they know you’re interested. And they can tell you like them, but you don’t do anything about it. And that is the issue because women are attracted to confidence and competence and guys that are direct and decisive and get to the point. And when you dither and hesitate for many months going to coffee and lunches, and that’s one of the things that 3% Man says. Invite the girl out for a drink or for dinner.

Do something in the evening. Because when you do lunches and coffees, especially when you do them over and over and over again, that’s something that a friend would do. Romance happens in the evening. Friendship typically happens during the day. So you’re communicating something whether you realize it or not, by only taking girls to coffee and lunch and never asking them out on a date.

Before working up the courage to ask her out and then when I did, she said that she just thought of me as a friend, understandably. At the time I was heartbroken and I thought it was the worst thing that had ever happened to me.

Yeah. Can you imagine all those many months, I mean, I did this a bunch in my teenage years, in my early 20s. Sometimes I wasted a year, year and a half, two years. The girl finally becomes single. I vomit my feelings, and I get that same. “Oh, I just think of you as a friend. You’re a really great guy.” But it was awful. And you think, “Man, all that emotional and that mental energy and the time wasted, the time wasted on the phone, talking, going to lunches and spinning your wheels and going nowhere.”

It was in this point that I started looking at YouTube videos on the friend zone and found your work. After that, I started absorbing and applying your work relentlessly. 

Well, this is why he’s done well and he’s got a great success story because he really took the time to read the book over and over and over and over and over again. You need to get to know it so well. You could teach a class on it. Because there’s so many subtle nuances here. And even he recognizes it, that if you just go through the book once or twice or even a couple of times, you’re just going to miss those.

But the most important thing is you got to practice because without the practice, the dots don’t connect and you don’t see what’s in the book happening in your own life. Because when you see what’s in the book happening in your own life, that’s what convinces you and gives you the confidence. Like, man, this shit really works. This shaved head little dude really does know what he’s talking about.

Part 2. Learning.

Over the next two years, I completely changed my approach to life, being inspired by your teachings.

Notice he says two years. What I teach is not an easy fix. This is not a a flip a switch and your life becomes infinitely better overnight. It takes time. It takes repetition. It takes dedication and discipline on your part. But the payoff is a lifetime of happiness and love.

I took up martial arts, started running half marathons, traveling overseas and going on as many dates as I could, through dating apps and through meeting girls in real life. I listened to your audiobook again and again and kept forcing myself to apply the principles. I probably went on dates with 20 different girls in a year. Of those girls, there were probably 4 or 5 I really liked and started seeing casually. This is the key I’ve learned about 3% Man.

This is really important.

Reading it isn’t enough, you have to learn to apply it over time because there are lots of little nuances and lessons in the book that seem small but make a huge differences when applied in real life. You won’t get it all right the first time but through practice, it becomes very easy.

For example, body language is huge and once you know what to look for, you can be pretty certain within a second or two if a girl likes you or not. Also, going for a kiss at the end of the first date is the quickest way to save yourself from wasting time, because if a girl kisses you back great, if not then she doesn’t graduate to a second date and you save yourself wasted time. 

And for those of you guys that are on a budget saves you money. You don’t want to find out in a second or third date that she’s not interested. Find out in the first. Then you don’t waste the time and money in the subsequent dates. Plus, you don’t invest the emotional and the mental energy getting hung up on her, wondering if things are going to progress when you could have figured that out at the end of the first date by just going for the kiss.

Part 3. The Breakthrough. 

After a year of applying these lessons and working out, my life was going really well. People started to tell me that I seemed really relaxed and fit and happy and also firm and decisive, my social life also really improved. 

You notice it’s a small incremental process. Success is a process in anything that you do, whether it’s in getting in shape, building a business, growing your career, moving up the corporate ladder. Getting through college, whatever it happens to be, it’s a process. So commit to the process of being successful.

I also met a beautiful girl at a party and instantly we had an amazing connection, the kind you talk about in the book, and I was able to apply everything I’d learned in 3% Man all at once. 

Well, that’s because he had done the work. As he said, he spent about two years really applying it in earnest and then when the right girl came along, he was prepared. Remember, what did Aristotle say? “Excellence is not a singular act. It is a habit. You are what you do repeatedly.”

I am in my mid-thirties and I met an amazing girl who is ten years younger than me. I asked her out on a date and she said yes, I kissed her after the first date and she kissed me back passionately. She texted me all the time, she did 100% of the pursuing and I used that to set the next date. After date number 3, she invited me over and the Indoor Olympics occurred.

Well, she just basically opened the door and all he had to do was walk through it.

After that, about 6 weeks in, I suggested that we go away for a weekend. During this weekend getaway she cooked every single meal for me and gave me massages and told me that she loved how decisive and masculine I am and that she feels safe with me. Right on time, 6 to 8 weeks, exactly as you say in the books, she brought up that she wanted exclusivity.

We were watching TV and a girl came on the TV in a bikini and I laughed and she said, “no bikini girls from TV I only want you to look at me”. I said, “what are you trying to say?”. She said, “I want you all to myself, I want exclusivity, I want to call you my boyfriend”.

That’s pretty direct. Most women will hint at it, but what I like about this girl is she just comes right out and says it. Seems like she was raised right. She had a father that loved her properly. So there’s no holding back, no structured nonsense. Just easy going. Easy to get along with, nice to you.

I said, “that sounds good” and then we did the Indoor Olympics once again. 

Well, you’ve got to celebrate, obviously.

It felt amazing to have something happen so naturally, exactly like you said it would in the book! I’m really happy to be with her now  but I won’t stop learning, I’ll keep listening to 3% Man to make sure that I get the relationships part from the book right, and I’m going to keep courting her and dating her even as me move into a longer relationship – because the work of a 3% Man never stops.

Yeah, you can never stop growing. Never stop evolving. Most of the guys that do well long term, they go through 3% Man every six months. Because again, you’ve got to remember the movies and the TV and the culture, the cultural narratives, I should say that we’re consuming are brainwashing us to for us guys to act like women, for women to act like men, and that ruins the sexual polarity.

And that’s a big part of the problem. So to prevent yourself from going back to sleep, and especially when you’ve done all the work like this guy has at least every six months go through the book. Take your time, sit in a quiet room, put the audiobook on 2X or 1.5X, and then follow along in a digital or physical copy with zero distractions. You really need to take the time to absorb the material, not just listen to the book as background noise to get through the reads. You’re trying to learn it and absorb it and apply it so you can master it.

P.S. I recently found out that the girl who friend-zoned me and started me on my 3% Man journey is now apparently a lesbian, so I don’t think I missed out on much there. 

Kind regards, 

Bob

Well, if you’ve got a success story you’d like to send in, send it to [email protected]. If you’ve got a topic that you think would be good for discussion in a future Video Newsletter, send it to [email protected].

And if you’d like to get my help personally with a challenge that you’re having either in your personal or professional life, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

If you haven’t already signed up for my Exclusive Premium Members Only Content in the video description is video, there are links to join on YouTube, or you can join on Spotify or our Website UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just click the “plans” tab when you get there. And the good news is with my Website, you can do a seven day free trial to check out all the great content and extensive library of additional content that you get for being a Premium Member.

And if you choose an annual plan, you can get a 25% discount at the end of the seven day free trial. So go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the “plans” tab, sign up for a seven day free trial for a Premium Membership. And until next time, I will talk to you soon.