7 Principles To Get An Ex Back: Friend Zone Drama

How to properly apply 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back if you have friend zone drama.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a 61-year-old viewer who says he turned off a 42-year-old woman he was dating and she monkey branched to a new guy. However, he’s trying to properly implement 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back and is trying to get out of friend-zone.

My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Well, this particular email is from a 61-year-old dude, and he says he was dating a 42-year-old woman, but he basically turned her off and drove her away and he thinks that she monkey branch to a new guy. However, she still is getting back in touch and he’s trying to properly apply what I teach in my article and video, 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back, but she’s still trying to keep him firmly stuck in friend zone, so we’ll go through how he can properly apply the principles in 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back to his specific situation.

Viewer Email:

Hey Corey,

Thank you for all of your hard work and insight. I would have lived my whole life not knowing what does and does not attract beautiful women. How did you figured all this out so early in life is beyond me. It must be your calling.

Well, I was highly motivated. It really sucks growing up and always watching guys or your close friends get the bad bitches and all you get is blue balls. Or you get the girls that nobody else wants or that you’re really not that into, and the ones that you really like, even though they seem to be initially interested, something happens and it just kind of fades away and you can never figure it out.

So by the time I got into my late 20s, early 30s, I was like, because it obviously is not about looks, a lot of people like to say, “Oh, it’s money and looks. If you’re handsome and you got money, everything’s great.” I would be like, “Well, I had plenty of friends who had money and they were extremely handsome and girls loved them at first, but then after the fact, girls would walk all over them.” They would cheat on them. These guys had everything going for them and that didn’t make any sense. Then I had other guys that didn’t have a lot going for them, but there was just something different. Girls were crazy about them and they didn’t have these problems. They didn’t get jerked around with chicks and they didn’t take shit from women either. They would put women in their place and stand up to them. They would basically act like a man. It’s obvious to me now at this point in my life, but when I was younger and I didn’t know any better, it was a complete fucking mystery. Women made no sense. I mean, even Sigmund Freud couldn’t figure women out, and he was like the father of modern psychology and he couldn’t figure them out.

So there was a lot of other people I learned from that I wrote about in 3% Man that helped me connect the dots, and it’s like, once you get it and once you understand it, how women operate and what makes them attracted and repulsed, they become as predictable as the sun coming up in the east and setting in the west. That’s a nice place to place to be as a man, because it puts you in a peaceful and relaxed state and you’re going to do your best work when you’re peaceful and you’re relaxed. So that’s why guys have experienced 3% Man and done well and had success with it, their careers, their businesses just really take off because they get so focused, because their personal lives and their interactions with women are no longer confusing the fuck out of them and bewildering them to the point where like, “I don’t understand what the hell’s going on.” So I’m glad you’re here and you’re learning because if you’re watching this, you still got time left. You’re not dead yet. “So what would you be OK with going to your grave, having never done or never experienced?” Is kind of the way to look at things and think about things.

I’m going to fast forward to where I am presently in trying to implement your 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back. After turning her off and certain she monkey branched to another man before ending it. I’m 61, she’s 42 and needs the attention of multiple male orbiters.

So she’s kind of got like a Frankenstein boyfriend project going on. So she’s fucking Chad Thundercock, and she’s got all these other guys that give her attention and validation. More than likely, she came from a broken home. Her dad wasn’t there for her, and she’s probably a mess, but you can have a lot of fun with her while you look for somebody that’s more family-oriented, more girlfriend, potentially wife material, if you’re one of those crazy dudes that wants to involve the government in your relationship, but hey, I don’t judge. My job as a coach is to help you get what you want, not to be your priest or to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do, or how you should or shouldn’t live your life. I’m not the morality police here.

I’m having to accept she is not good girlfriend or wife material. However, I still want something physical with her.

Because there’s women that are for fun and there are women that for are for family. So she’s a girl for fun.

My dilemma is I believe she is still trying to friend-zone me or wants another male orbiter.

Well, what it really is, is she’s trying to get you to basically say, “No, I’m not going to do this. She wants you to stand up to her, and the reason that she calls you and tries to keep you in friend-zone is she’s just testing you. She’s just seeing if you’re soft and squishy, because what happens is if she says, “How about friends only?” And you say no, she’ll get upset. “Oh, this is hard.” Then a few days later she’ll be like, “Hey, how are you? Let’s go to lunch. I’ve been thinking,” and the guy thinks, “Oh alright, I got a chance. She’s been thinking. She had an epiphany,” but you don’t fall for that. If she reaches back out, that’s why you make dinner in the evening at your place, because a woman who’s making plans to come over and make dinner at your place knows that sex is on the table. That’s a romantic evening. If she’s trying to keep you in beta male orbiter friend-zone, she’s not going to agree to come over in the evening. That’s why they try to get you to go to lunch, go on a group date, meet in a group setting, go have coffee, meet at neutral ground or go to her place.

As 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back says, she’s supposed to be earning another chance with you, not the other way around. Remember she blew this guy off to go date somebody else because as he said, he basically turned her off. So she’s trying to see how compliant he is because women are naturally driven and innately, they test men to see which ones are masculine and which ones are soft and squishy. As long as you’re masculine and she can’t jerk you around or play games with you or get you to act like a bitch, it makes her pussy wet. It makes her more attracted to you. If you act squishy and you agree to go to lunch, go to coffee, meet on neutral ground, or stop by her place and pick her up and go to her when she’s already stuck you in friend-zone, if she can get you to agree to do things that are platonic in nature, even though you said you weren’t interested in friendship, your actions show that you’re OK with it. Therefore that’s why you stay stuck there. That’s why you don’t agree to do anything that is platonic in nature, and only way you’re willing to see her and interact with her, especially at this point after you were dating and probably hooking up for a while, is she’s got to come to you. She’s got to make the date in the evening, because women that are open to hanging out, having fun, hooking up and potentially having romance with you will agree to come over. Women that are not just won’t make plans with you. They won’t come over, or they’re going to try to get you to do something during the day or lunch or meet on neutral ground.

That’s why everything is in 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back is set up the way it is, because it forces women to shit or get off the pot. It prevents them from fucking jerking you around. I’ve done plenty of video newsletters over the years where guys kind of fudge things in 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back or they cherry pick and they do some things, they go to lunches and they get nowhere, and I point it out and it’s like you’re still acting like a friend. Even though you said you weren’t down, you continued to behave that way. So from your actions, you were a bitch and you submitted to what she wanted.

After making it clear that “just” friends won’t work and going no-contact, she reached out and left a voicemail saying she, “Was just calling to see how I was doing.” On Monday, I texted her this: “I got your voicemail, been out of town all week. Try to get away and come over on Thursday around 7 or 8 to share a bottle of wine.”

Time out! Survey says, “Ehh!” That’s not the way you set a definite date. I would have just texted her back or called her back. I would have said, “Hey, been out of town, sorry. I got your message. I’d love to see you. Why don’t we get together and make dinner this week? What’s your schedule like?” Instead, you just said, “Hey, try to get away Thursday. If you got nothing else going on and you’d like to hang out, just come over Thursday around 7 or 8. I’ll be sitting at my house, waiting around with my thumb up my butt, waiting for you to come see me,” and of course, when you do that, she ain’t gonna come. It’s the wrong way to go about it, because the way you tried to set a date is very beta male. There’s no confidence in it. There’s no certainty it should be from the perspective of, “Hey, we should get together and make dinner. What’s your schedule like?” And let her tell you. Then you make a definite date, and if she’s trying to keep you stuck in friend-zone, she’s going to try to squirm out of the evening date.

Like I said, you basically gave her an out with this. You said, “Hey, I’m going to sit around and wait for you on Thursday and hopefully you show up.” Men who have choices and options with women, they’re not going to do that. They’re not going to leave their Thursday open for, “Oh, I hope she shows up.” Again, you’re still acting weak. You’re still not acting like a guy that’s used to getting what he wants. You’re acting like a guy who is used to begging women to spend time with them. It’s just the vibe that it gives off. Women want the guy that’s confident, that’s certain, and you’re not acting that way. It’s subtle, but it’s the difference that makes the difference.

“I know you miss me, LOL.”

That’s such a lame beta male type of message. I would not have sent that.

I called also…

Shows more neediness, more desperation. Now I understand why she blew you off. So this is why you got to read the book 10 to 15 times, dude. You got to clean up your behavior.

…But it went to voicemail. She ghosted me until Thursday at 8:21 p.m. with this text: “Hey Bob, I can’t make it tonight, although wine sounds nice. I will come soon.”

I responded 30 minutes later, “No problem. Hit me up in a couple of weeks when I’m back in town again.”

So that was to be expected. It’s surprising that she even reached back out, “Hey, come by around 7 or 8.” So she texts him, it’s 8:21, to purposely say, “Oh hey, I’m not coming. Oh, I can’t make it. Ah shucks, darn it! Ah bummer!” She just doesn’t want to see you, but it’s like dangling the carrot.

So you got to clean up your game. You got to ask women and make definite plans, definite date, definite time. Never, ever make a one sided date like that. That’s absurd.

Could the ghosting been a test to see how I would react…

Yeah, absolutely.

…Since I displayed some lack of control and anger during the break up phase, or is it just low interest or the other man in the picture?

Well, the other man is still clearly in the picture, but she’s dangling the carrot just making sure you’re still interested, which obviously you communicated it. So typically when they reach out like this, they’re not really sure about the new guy, but they want to make sure that you’re still potentially in the background. That’s all it was, but because you were sloppy and trying to set a date and you just basically said you’re going to sit at home and wait for her on Thursday, of course she’s going to not show up. That’s as predictable as the sun coming up in the east and setting in the west, especially when you did so many unattractive things before. These things are subtle, but they they communicate completely different things.

She responded, “You letting the garden go? I need to lay out there.”

She saw my garden on Facebook and I live out in the country on some water with no people nearby and she lives about a mile away.

After the declined dinner invitation and still showing low interest, I suspect she is still seeing someone.

Yes, I would agree with that, but it wasn’t really a dinner invitation. You basically just said, “Hey, Your Highness, I’m going to be sitting at home waiting for you to hopefully show up and grace me with your presence so I can lick and kiss your feet and worship you in my living room, and maybe I’ll get a peck on the cheek.” It’s a bad way to go, dude. Don’t do things like that again.

I responded, “When I get back, the garden’s fine. It’s remotely controlled.”

She did not reply after that.

Scenario 1:

Is her coming over alone to my place and laying out during the day a substitute for a night date at my place?

No, it’s just her going, “Oh, I may come over to your place and hang out, and you can look at me and desire me, and I probably won’t sleep with you anyways.” You’re trying to see if she’ll submit to you. Did she submit to you? No. She waited till 8:21 and said, “Ah shucks, I can’t make it tonight,” because she kind of knows you’re a chump, you’re kind of soft and squishy and you reconfirmed to her that nothing has changed in you. You’re still a squishy beta male that she blew off.

So I wouldn’t expect to hear from her for a week or two, because now what you did was validate that she made the right choice with the guy she monkey branch to see how that works.

In both scenarios you could hang out, have fun and hook up. It’s happened before when we were supposedly exclusive.

Yeah, but that was then. This is now. She’s fucking somebody else, and you got blue balls and you’re begging her to pay attention to you.

So I can see what is going on here is you’re really too afraid to apply what’s in the book. I don’t know if you’ve even read it or maybe you’re just cherry picking videos. If you’re trying to cherry pick videos, you’re not going to be successful because you’re just making too many mistakes. There’s too many things you don’t know, and you’re getting absolutely bamboozled by women.

Scenario 2:

How do I handle her asking if she can lay out, especially if she tries to bring her son and his friends too…

See, these are the cock blockers she’s going to bring. She likes the attention, the validation, whatever money you spend on her, things you do for her, but at the end of the day, she’s bringing other people so she doesn’t have to fuck you. That’s why you don’t agree to these things. Again, 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back is laid out to prevent this kind of bullshit from happening, but you’re cherry picking and you’re, in essence, too much of a pussy to stand up to her and stick to what you want.

I know I’m being harsh, but I mean, you’re 61 years old, so at some point you got to stop doing what hasn’t worked because you’re really not changing your overall behavior. It’s like you’re too timid, you’re too shy, you’re too cowardly to just stick to your guns. So she says, “Oh, I want to come over during the day.” Again, this is her trying to do something that’s platonic and use you for attention and validation. That’s why again, you make dates in the evening and she’s like, “Oh, can I bring my son and his friends?” Just say, “No, I’m making a date with you. I want to hang out with you, not your son and his friends. They can go do things on their own. Again, 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back is laid out so you don’t get jerked around.

What’s happening is you’re too soft, you’re too squishy and you’re not really applying it. You’re like, misapplying it totally. What’s happening is you’re still getting jerked around. How does that feel? It sucks. I’ve been there. It’s not fun to behave this way, and you’re not going to get anywhere other than just spinning your wheels and frustrating yourself. That’s why you got angry and upset with her because it was frustrating. So if you want to stop being frustrated and start being enchanted and bewildered by women, then you got to act like a man consistently.

…And keep true to the 7 Principles (i.e., Staying no contact and the three-date rule)?

Thank You,

Bob

What the three-date rule means is she’s got to come to your place three dates in a row. As long as you hang out, have fun and hook up all three times in a row, then you can meet her out and pick her up after that, but you got to let her do 100% of the calling, texting and pursuing. So when you’re saying, “Hey, let’s get together for dinner in the evening,” and she’s proposing, “How about I come over during the day and lay out?” It’s like a substitute for the lunch thing. Again, that’s why you don’t agree to it. That’s why you’re making dinner plans in the evening at your place and not doing daytime things. That’s why she also wants to bring her son and his friends so she can come over, waste your time, eat your food, drink your drinks, his friends and him make a mess, and then you get a peck on the cheek. “Oh, you’re such a great friend.” Then you just reiterated to her again that you’re not masculine and manly enough to make her feel safe to want to sleep with you. That’s what’s going on here.

So 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back is laid out, and what’s happening here is you’re trying to bend it to fit yourself into her world instead of sticking to what’s laid out, because what is laid out is perfected over two decades and you’re just trying to cherry pick when you don’t know what the hell you’re doing, so you’re getting nowhere. So if you’re happy with the results you’re getting, then keep doing it, but if you continue to do what you’ve always done, you’ll continue to get what you’ve always got, and you’re clearly not happy. Otherwise you wouldn’t have written this email.

It is a good email because this is why things are laid out the way they are, so you don’t get fucking jerked around and frustrated and waste months and years of your life unnecessarily spinning your wheels. So if she says, “Oh, I want to come lay out,” just say, “Well, if you spend the night, maybe we can lay out the next day, but I want to get together and make dinner together.” Again, the reason why women try to squirm out of that is because they’re trying to avoid sleeping with you. That’s exactly why she, “Hey, can I bring my son and his friends over?” Because the nice guy will go, “I don’t want to upset her. I don’t want her to feel like I don’t like her son. OK, I’ll be nice, and if I’m nice to her, maybe she’ll have sex with me,” but in reality, you’re allowing her to bring cock-blockers, so nothing romantic is going to happen. So you’re doing it to yourself because you’re not man enough to stand up for yourself and what you want and stick to 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.