Why dating a woman who is easy going and easy to get along with is better than dating a cranky disagreeable women.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email success story from a 52 year old former Marine who got divorced after 23 years of marriage. He was dating a woman for the past 3 years who he went to high school with. It was romantic and passionate at times, but could also toxic because she was a jack-in-the-box and often cranky and difficult to be with. He broke up with her in a loving way and shares the night and day difference he is experiencing with a hot younger Brazilian woman he just met. She is easy going and easy to be with and just makes things effortless. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.
Hi, I’m coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter. And the topic of today’s newsletter is going to be, Cranky Disagreeable Woman Versus Easygoing Easy To Get Along With.
Well, I’ve got an email from this particular guy. He’s 52 year old former marine Semper Fi, and he got divorced after 23 years of marriage. And I think he said, like the last ten years, he was just a total doormat to his wife. And so, after he got divorced, he spent like the last three years in a relationship with a woman that he went to high school with.
And he said it was romantic and passionate at times, but also extremely toxic and difficult. And so, this is a success story of how he basically ditched the toxic, cranky, disagreeable woman. And now he’s dating this woman who is 40. She’s Brazilian, she’s sweet, she’s easy going, easy to get along with. He talks about how he met her and what a night and day difference it is.
Plus, he’s got two other dating prospects. So, for those of you guys that have just been through a divorce after a long marriage, or you just got out of a relationship or were dating somebody who was cranky and disagreeable, and then a date somebody that’s easygoing, easy to get along with, super sweet.
Like, if you guys have seen some of the videos that I did with Katie, my old English girlfriend, that I wrote about in 3% Man, when she came to visit us earlier this year, you can see it’s just the demeanor.
Like a woman who’s sweet, who’s agreeable, who respects your authority, doesn’t talk back to you. Who’s not nasty to you. Never talks to you in a harsh tone. Life is hard enough. Especially if, like me, I’m kind of a cranky guy anyways at times, and I can get irritable. It’s.
That’s why I typically always do way better with women that are easygoing, easy to get along with than a woman who’s also kind of cranky. So, with that in mind, let’s go through his email and see the difference. To go from dating a Jack in the box, to somebody that’s easy going, easy to get along with.
Hi Coach Corey,
I made time to thank you for your work. I have recommended your book to several men because they are lost in their way, as I was. I have finished Your Book twice and will read it until I can recite it. I am a 52-year-old former Marine divorced and had been married for 23 years. The last 10 of that I was a doormat because all I did was work and I never made an effort to consciously appreciate my ex-wife who is a truly good person.
My last relationship of 3 years was good and not so good at times. We are connected socially, same High School and same age. It was romantic and passionate but also toxic at times. For the first 18 months I was able to remain calm and masculine as she would say “how come you’re not mad”, shit test after shit test.
Yeah, after a while you could be calm, and because masculinity is calm. But if you’ve got a woman that’s just constantly prodding and constantly being bitchy and constantly goes from being sweet and nice, when you go to bed one day, then the next day she wakes up and she’s just bitchy and cranky and herbal, just because she got up on the wrong side of the bed.
And that’s her demeanor. It’s like it gets old after a while. It gets old after a while, when you’re in a good mood, and then she just decides she’s in a shit mood and wants to take it out on you. You’re just like, I don’t want to deal with this. The best way to deal with that is to not deal with that. Is to say, well, you’re in a really crappy mood, and unless you’re going to be apologizing and be nice to me, you could spend the day by yourself.
I’ll go do something else. It’s best way to handle it. If she’s not going to treat you properly, she could skip to missing you. Just go do something else without her. Take the kids if you got kids, and go do something else and let the cranky woman stay at home. Because I know there’s a lot of you guys that come to me and you’re already married, you already got a family.
And it’s easy to say, to have a bunch of amateurs who’ve never had a girlfriend in the internet going, “Oh, he’s dump her. Just move on.” It’s like, yeah, it’s not so easy when the guy’s already been with a girl multiple years, and they got a house together and they got kids.
And so, how do you deal with that? You don’t. If she’s sweet and nice, she gets your presents. The greatest gift you can give anybody is a gift of your time. If she’s nice, she gets to have you around. And if she’s a bitch, you’re just going to go hang out with other people who are nice to you. It’s pretty simple. It’s a binary choice.
We were going to move in together. She has two kids; however, her baseline behavior changed a couple times. My Spidey senses started tingling at times knowing something was off, I should have bolted a year ago. After I read your book, we became more intimate and connected, however the damage was done. Her masculinity increased and was not easygoing on a consistent basis. I had had enough if the ups and downs.
(fast forward to June 2023) I met a 40-year-old Brazilian immigrant.
Well, Brazilians, some Brazilians. I will qualify, because some of them are batshit crazy. Some Brazilians do, do it better. I must say, from personal experience.
I chatted with her for about 30 minutes, and I made a date on the spot. I took her out a couple times and realized how easy going and sweet she is. I concluded that I was better off without the toxicity in my life.
Amen, brother. Amen, Amen. Can I hear an amen? Amen in the church today!
I ended the 3-year relationship as lovingly as possible saying nothing negative to my now ex-girlfriend as she exaggerated everything.
Well, all women do a degree tend to take the little things and go like it’s the end of the world and your job is to go. It’s not a big deal, “Zoop.” Shrink it back down. But, it’s not, it’s fine occasionally, but if it’s just like all the time, then it’s just, “Ugh.” Nobody wants to put up with that.
We had a cry fest and haven’t spoken since. I have been at peace, jogging, hitting the gym and enjoying my life.
Well, as I was reprimanded in my late 20s by a friend who used to run. He says, “Corey, we don’t jog. We run.” Because it’s true. You go for a run, not a jog. Serious runners run. I ran two miles today on my sweet Woodway Forefront treadmill, because those are the best treadmills in the world. And typically do that every time I have a filming session. And it’s just, “Ahh” it’s why I’m so bright and “Woohoo!” Mostly.
Alone has been healthy for me.
Well, it’s important to get to a happy place yourself where you love being alone like me. I love my time alone, and if I’m going to spend time with friends or family or a girl, I want it to be with somebody that improves the silence. And if you can’t bring more excitement and more fun and more peace and more ease and delight in my life, I’m not going to want to hang out with you.
It’s just that simple. I’m 53 and going to be 54 in a few months. It’s like the older you get, the more you just don’t want to put up with bullshit. Life is too short.
Alone has been healthy for me.
It’s like, if you can’t enjoy your own company, you’re not going to be good company for anybody else. So do what you need to do to get to a happy place and to where you can really have a blast and look forward to those times when it’s just you.
I am seeing the new girl and have been on several dates & sleepovers. I have meet 2 other women organically (not via apps) it’s great how you describe the timeline and the emotional journey each woman takes to the T. I have used your material “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell” “I just want to hang out and have fun.” “I’ll pick you up at 8pm on Thursday, look sexy we are going to dinner and dancing.”
Good vibes are the mission with dating the hooking up part as you can imagine has been great.
Yeah, it’s pretty easy when you know what to do and how to read women like a book. It’s like the seduction is just effortless, and you never have to worry about getting rejected for sex, which is unfortunately for most guys, they really struggle with that.
Because they don’t understand how attraction works. They don’t know how to make a woman feel heard and understood, and they don’t know how to date in court her properly. And obviously I got the solution. But the book all assumes you’re dating a good, normal, healthy woman, not some ratchet.
The book is a valuable resource to better oneself and get aligned with masculinity in its true form. Slow and steady wins the race.
So, like Rumi said, “Slow and steady. Like the river that never grows stale. No hurry. No rush.” Pick a woman who is easy going, easy to get along with, and is not a Jack in The Box. Because a Jack in The Box is going to make your life hell. Trust me on that.
So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur