Why you should focus on mastering the progression of meeting a woman for the first time, to having your first date, to seducing her successfully as the proper way to prepare yourself to meet and win the heart of the woman of your dreams.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who asks what I think is the best way to prepare for and attract a great relationship with a woman who totally knocks your socks off. He wonders if he should wait and hold out until he meets a woman who knocks his socks off, instead of dating anyone who is below the criteria of what he’s looking for, or if he should date multiple women, even if they aren’t his ideal, so he can have fun and maybe hook up with some of them to improve his skills, put him in an abundance vibration and give him a better chance of landing the right one when she comes along. He admits, he tends to come a little unglued and treat really beautiful women he likes differently than the average woman he meets, for whom he has no interest. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email:
I’d like to get your opinion on how to attract a great relationship, because I hear two schools of thought.
1) Wait and hold out for someone who knocks your socks off. Bombshell hot, amazing personality and ticks all the boxes. Don’t date anyone who is below these criteria, and be happy working on yourself and living your life alone. (I definitely agree with working on yourself, but then again, repetition is the mother of skill. If you don’t practice, you’re not going to get any better.)
2) Get out there, and date multiple women. They don’t have to be your ideal; just good enough to spend some time with and maybe hook up. (Absolutely. You can get some good experience, and it will build your confidence. With every person you date, they help you get better.) By doing this, you will improve your skills with women and give off the vibe of having options, so when that right one does come along, you’ll have more chance of hooking up with her. (This is exactly what I teach in my book. Maybe you haven’t read the book yet, but you definitely need to read it 10-15 times, and take this stuff seriously. You have to learn the fundamentals. It’s about preparing, but most people are not willing to put the time into developing their skills and becoming really great at something.)
I want a girl who is bombshell hot and I’m enthusiastic to see and be with. (Those kinds of women don’t come along every day. You have to prepare yourself by practicing the things I teach over and over. It takes time. There’s no shortcut. You have to put the time in.) I’m currently doing option 2, dating multiple girls who are “okay” in my book, but not amazing. (The bottom line is, you’re getting practice. That’s the important thing, because you can read the book and watch countless videos, but if you don’t go on dates, you’re going to be like a deer in the headlights when you finally do go out with somebody you like.)
I also act quite different around girls I think are hot, 9’s and 10’s, than I do around girls I date, 6’s and 7’s. (When you get around the women you really like, you put them on a pedestal, kiss their ass and wind up getting friend-zoned, because you act unworthy. The key is to treat all women the same.) I know this is because I think so highly of the hotter ones that I change my behavior and act less natural, (You’re not going to be able to land a 10 if you’re doing this. If you’re not getting any practice, then you’re going to screw it up because you can’t handle it. A really hot woman is like Kryptonite with men), and I care too much about how I come across. (You still obviously care what other people think about you. You have to get to a point where you don’t give a damn what other people think about you. Otherwise, you give your power away.) I don’t know how to get around this, and find it really frustrating that I don’t seem to be able to get the girls I really want. (You’re not practicing, therefore, you’re not getting better. You have to get to the point where being around beautiful women is not a big deal. If you feel like you don’t deserve somebody like that, you tend to try too hard, and women don’t like that.) I’m hoping you can give me some advice around this. (If you want to land a 10 and get the woman of your dreams to fall in love with you, you have to prepare. You have to participate in your own rescue. It’s important to put time and repetition in if you want to become awesome, and master the progression of dating.)
Thanks for all your great work.
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
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From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Like Sun Tzu said, “Every battle is won before it is fought.” Succeeding and winning any competition, at life, in your career, at business or in love, is determined by what you do and how you prepare ahead of time. Becoming great at anything requires countless practice repetitions to develop and hone your skills. Most people have the desire to win, but few people possess the will, determination, dedication and discipline to prepare to win. In life, you’re either preparing to and expecting to win, or making excuses that guarantee losing.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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