Exes, Bad Breakups & Restraining Orders

How to let go of bad relationships, toxic people & what’s holding you back from getting the woman you deserve. “There is no imperfection; you’ve only ever done what you were meant to do.” ~ Panache Desai. A big part of becoming all that you are capable of becoming, is learning to master the art of letting go of limiting beliefs, people, toxic friends and relationships, your past, your failures, etc. Until you learn to let go of what no longer serves you, or what you were or used to be, it will be like a giant boat anchor around your neck that keeps you firmly locked and rooted in place, and therefore, unable to move forward and create new successes and experiences in your life. Intense emotions can be overwhelming to both men and women who are unable to deal with the most intense emotions of love, anger, rejection, failure, etc. that comes when a relationship ends, or there is a breakup. Men and women both, sometimes do crazy and irrational things due to bad breakups, and, irrational fears and emotions.

When I was in real estate, one of my most successful and driven salespeople who made multiple six figures every year, dated a girl who was a little wacky. During one of their breakup periods, this little 105 pound ex-girlfriend of his destroyed his solid-core wood front door! Things got so bad he got a temporary restraining order against her. However, a few days into the restraining order, he’s fucking her brains out again! He liked the “psycho sex” he used to joke. He let’s the restraining order expire after two weeks, and their drama filled relationship continues on. The following is the third e-mail I received over the past few months from this particular reader. The last time we heard from him, he was doing pretty well and happened to be visiting a friend of his who works with his ex-girlfriend. While she was around when he was in his friends office, he received two phone calls from two different women he was dating. He said it made him feel so good, but that his ex-girlfriend had a very mean and pissed off look on her face. Well, two months later as he’s moved on with his life and is enjoying the new women he’s dating, he gets served with a restraining order from his ex-girlfriend. The case has been finalized since then, but he writes in asking my opinion on the situation. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:

Corey, Jerry here, Ex across the street. Really liked the article about “He’s making his ex jealous?” Anyway, one week later on Friday night, the town cops showed up at my home with a temp restraining order, took my firearms and it gave me a court date for March 12th. Guess who it was from? Now, I had not seen her for almost 2 months, had moved on. She accused me of threatening her life in my friends office. It was the most bazaar thing I could ever remembering happening to me. Final judgement that I agreed to was not getting near her for the next 2 years. BTW, when asked a week and a half after getting the temp restraining order in court by the judge to her, if I could have my firearms back, without hesitation she said, sure it’s ok. My friend Brian, who gave me your book is also my Lawyer. (You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.) He couldn’t believe it even happened, but suggested I just sign and do what I had been doing just leaving her alone. He also suggested I write you and ask if you have ever come across anything like this before. I wasn’t going to, but finally got curious. Not looking for an answer on what to do because there is only one thing to do. Seems like I dodged a bullet on the marriage thing. On another note, she listened to my conversation with my friend about selling my house and moving out of state, so she knew I wasn’t interested in getting back together with her. What do you think if anything at all? (Three possibilities: 1) She’s a little fucked in the head, jealous you appeared to be moving on when you got those phone calls from other women when you were visiting your friend, who you said also works with her, as a way to get back at you for the fact you appeared to have moved on with your life, and other women. 2) Maybe your body language was hostile towards her and she felt threatened. Maybe you gave her an angry look, or you were angry at her when you were there. Women are very empathic and can usually pick up on someones internal emotional state, especially when it’s a very intense, positive or negative emotion. 3) You’re totally full of shit and really threatened her. I can’t say for sure because I can only go by what you tell me. Sometimes people embellish or paint a rosier picture of their actions to make themselves look better to others, and to feel better about themselves. The only people who know what really happened are you, her and your friend who was there. Listen to your Lawyer regardless. I don’t think you’ll be hearing from her again. You have new knowledge and a clean slate to create the next greatest version of yourself. Choose to follow your heart and do something your really love and enjoy for a living. The happier and more successful you feel you are as a man internally, the more attractive you will be to women and the more they will work to get your attention.)

Thanks

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ~ Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free