Girlfriend Wants To Talk To You But You’re Not In The Mood To Listen

Corey answers a viewer question from a man who asks what he should do when his girlfriend wants to talk, but he’s not in the mood to listen.

Viewer’s Question:

What do you do if you’re girlfriend is trying to talk to you, but you’re not in the mood to listen?

Corey: When a woman feels heard and understood, the legs open, and when she doesn’t, the legs close. At the end of the day, say you come home from work and she’s like, “Oh, Corey, I got my nails done. What do you think?” and you’re like, “I’m busy right now. I don’t have time,” what you’ve basically communicated is, “You’re not important to me. I don’t love you. I don’t care about you. I’ve got these other things going on. I’d rather focus on that and not you.” Feminine energy grows through praise, and all she wants you to say is, “Wow, those look beautiful. You look amazing. I can’t wait to take you out later. And then, when we get home later, you can run them up and down my back. Then I’ll give you my full opinion on those nails.”

Caroline: Yeah, it doesn’t hurt to just give a little bit of input. You don’t have to be an asshole. I know guys that are just not in the mood. Like, I actually had someone tell me this once and I was like, I didn’t realize until later when I wasn’t around him, that was kind of rude. But he was just giving me attitude when we were hanging out. This was an ex at the time.

Corey: Obviously

Caroline: Yeah.

Corey: So, he was an ex when you were hanging out. At that time.

Caroline: Yeah.

Corey: And you were hoping to heat up leftovers, maybe, and then it would taste better the second time around?

Caroline: No, we were just hanging out as friends, but we were together for a little while. And then you could see, by body language, that he was getting irritated, annoyed. And then I was like, “Am I doing something that’s bothering you? Like, am I talking too much? Is my voice annoying?” He’s like, “Honestly, now that you say that, yeah, your voice is kind of annoying.”

Corey: Ouch.

Caroline: I was like, “I was just joking. I was like, “Okay.” And then I didn’t think much of it. I was like, “Oh, okay. I’m sorry.”

Corey: And how did that make you feel?

Caroline: Then later on, I’m like, damn, is my voice really that annoying? Like, it’s kind of rude. So you don’t need to act like that. You could just say, “Oh, I just need some space right now,” or “I just need a moment of silence.”

Corey: Beauty needs a witness. If you don’t like her voice, you shouldn’t be with her.

Caroline: Yeah.

Corey: And obviously he’s an ex for a reason in this particular case.

Caroline: Exactly.

Corey: Even if you don’t feel like it, ust 30 seconds of being present and acknowledging the fact that she went to the beauty salon and was there for 3 hours, and got looking all nice for you, and tried on ten outfits for your date tonight.

Caroline: Yeah.

Corey: Just show some appreciation, because beauty needs a witness. Feminine energy grows through praise. And when you praise a beautiful woman, she becomes more beautiful. She smiles more, she feels validated, and it’s really easy to do. Why withhold it? You’re just going to create problems down the road. Take the time.

Caroline: Yeah. And I think if it’s a constant feeling, as well, if you’re always in a mood around her or you’re always annoyed, then something’s not clicking there. And you need to figure that out, because she doesn’t deserve to be treated any…

Corey: Maybe he’s just miserable and unhappy, which we know from our discussions. That has been the case with some of the exes.

Caroline: Yeah.

Corey: You can’t give away what you don’t have for yourself. If you’re not happy, you’re not going to be a good teammate.

Caroline: I agree.

Corey: And girls just want to have fun. If you’re a sourpuss. It’s not going to go well.