Having Choice With Women Leads To A Great Woman For A Relationship

Why having choice with women helps to attract a great woman to have a relationship with.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who shares how he went from an inexperienced failure with women to a man who now has his choice. He shares how he met his current girlfriend and the series of life events, twists and turns that led to the rekindling of their previous romance. They broke up after he moved away for school and he didn’t want to do long distance.

It’s an inspiring success story of how having choice with women enabled him to attract a really great quality woman to have a relationship with. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Well, I’ve got a success story for you guys. This dude is young, and what’s interesting is, as he puts it, he was basically an inexperienced failure. He hadn’t kissed any women, hadn’t had sex, just had no success at all with him. Then he got into my work. He didn’t have a lot of experience, but he ended up meeting this really beautiful girl and he sent pictures of her. He was a college student, still studying, and they had a great relationship for about a year, and she was just really awesome, I think it was only like the second girl that he’d ever really dated and been serious with. So he ended up moving away to a different country to finish his studies, and he’s like, “I’m young. I don’t really want to do long distance.” So he broke things off with her.

What’s interesting is several years later, he’s dating, he’s doing real well. He finally finishes college and turns out that he’s living in the same country again as this particular girl, and they’re not far apart. He reaches out to her to say, “Hey, I’d love to get together,” but she happened to be dating somebody. He’s like, “Well, if it doesn’t work out with that guy, let me know. I’d love to see you.” I don’t want to spoil the surprise.

Life is messy. It’s not a cookie cutter thing for the right person to drop into your lap. Like in this case, they had a really magical connection, but he was young and life kind of got in the way. Plus, he was strong enough and man enough to say, “I don’t really want to do long distance when we’re countries apart for the next couple of years.” So several years go by, and life circumstances kind of brought them closer together.

It’s really cool how how things kind of come together. The dude was a virgin, had no experience, he was getting nowhere. Then of course, he came across yours truly and read 3% Man, which you can get everywhere. It’s on Amazon, it’s on Google Play, it’s in the Apple Store. I mean, it’s pretty much in every place you get audio books, paperback, hardcover, you can get a copy of it.

So he was a good student. I think he said he found me in November of 2020. He was 24 at the time, so I guess he’s 28 now. This should inspire you guys no matter where you are. Everybody starts out as a beginner, like this guy when he first came across my work a little over three years ago. He was a total novice and he had no success, and he failed dismally. He sent pictures of him and his girlfriend, and she’s absolutely stunning. She’s beautiful. So it doesn’t take much to turn your life around, to go from being a thirsty man in the desert with a pussy embargo to a man who has choice with women.

He also talks about the other women that he dated and how it helped him evolve and grow as a man and his confidence. Then when he runs into or starts talking to his ex again, he had a completely different perspective. In other words, he got to see what the grass was like on the other side just because of his life circumstances. By the time he runs into this ex-girlfriend of his again, who he had ended the relationship with because he had to move away, what is that commercial, “We know a thing or two because we’ve seen a thing or two?” The insurance commercial? I can’t remember the guy’s name. It’s really good.

He had choice, and because he had choice, he’s not hungry. He’s not in a rush to make anything happen. When you have choice, you have options, you can make a careful, informed decision.

Viewer’s Email:

Hi Coach, 

I discovered your work three years ago, in November of 2020. When I found your work I was 24 years old, and about as big of a failure with the ladies as you can imagine. 

I had never had a girlfriend, had sex, or even kissed a girl until I was 23 years old. I was a decently good looking guy, and confident at my job, but when a beautiful woman came around me I would turn into a puddle of jello and throw my masculinity out the window.

Well, that’s pretty much how all western movies and TV shows portrays the average guy. A pretty girl comes around, she’s Kryptonite and guys just fall all over themselves trying to be her butler or her man servant to wait on them hand and foot, and hopefully she’ll pay attention to them.

Those of you who are 3% men know that attraction is not a choice. Really, it’s just a matter of not talking to women out of liking you, who are already predisposed to like you and want to sleep with you.

I was completely clueless as to how attraction worked, and had bought all of the Hollywood conditioning hook, line, and sinker.  

When I turned 23, I had my first relationship with a very attractive Mexican woman, but a combination of bad logistics (She moved back to Mexico) and my own insecurity led to her breaking up with me.

So he talked her out of liking him.

I was depressed and borderline suicidal. This is what first led me to your work. 

Yeah, because at that point you think you love this girl, you really want her, and as much as you liked her, didn’t matter. Your interest in a woman did not matter. She didn’t care what a good dude he was. All she cared about is how she felt about him, and because of his interactions with her and the way he was behaving, he completely turned her off to the point where she wanted nothing to do with him. That sucks. It hurts. That’s a very, very difficult pain to get to get over.

It just takes time and repetition, but when you’re young and it’s like never happened before and you have a break up, it feels like the end of the world. As you get older and you have a few successes, have a few relationships, get your heart broken a few times, the process is the process. The key is to find somebody who’s easygoing, easy to get along with, easy to communicate with. A woman that brings peace in your life, not one who brings constant chaos and drama.

At first I was hesitant to read your book. After all, there is a LOT of weird advice about dating on the internet.

Well, as I say all the time, even if you think I’m totally full of shit, if you read what’s in 3% Man, and you can read it totally for free at UnderstandingRelationships.com, all you got to do is subscribe to the free email newsletter, put your name and your email in there, hit submit and boom! The book will open up right in your web browser and you can read it right there. You can try before you buy. Once you see that it works, then go buy an audio book or a paperback or a digital or a hardcover version.

In hindsight, I realize how lucky I am that the first advice about dating that I found was your book, and the work of David Deida.

Well, I think David Deida is the way of the superior man. Every man should be given a copy of that when he gets in high school, or maybe even middle school, and start learning that.

At that point in my life I was feeling very bitter and confused where women were concerned…

Yeah, if you’re pissed off, because it’s not pleasant to say, “Hey, I chased her away. I fucked up,” it’s much easier to go, “Oh, modern women! They all suck.” “They all belong to the streets.” “They’re all on Only Fans.” “They’re all strippers, hookers and sex workers.” “That’s modern women. That’s all there is.” “I saw it on a podcast, Coach. I saw it in those Red pill podcast. That’s what they told me.”

…And I think I could have very easily gone down the rabbit hole of toxic rabbit hole of red pill content. Thank God that I found your book instead. 

By the end of my first read I knew you were the real deal.

Yeah, because I’ve been through everything that you guys could possibly go through. I made all the same mistakes that you all have made. Every guy does for the most part.

It all clicked. Suddenly I knew why women could feel such strong attraction to me in one moment, and then be completely turned off in the next. For the first time, I understood all my previous mistakes. I read 3% Man 11 times during those first few months. 

Only a month after discovering your book I met my dream woman. This chick was everything on my list: Beautiful, sexy, sweet, feminine, submissive, smart, and playful. I followed the fundamentals to a T, and before long she was completely in love with me. Some of the things that she would say to me were right out of the book.

Isn’t that weird? A woman could be in the opposite side of the world, speak a completely different language, completely different religion, and men there will make her feel exactly the same as a Western woman, and they’ll say the same exact things. It’s crazy!

I remember one night she said, “I can’t believe how safe and comfortable I feel around you.” It was a magical time in my life. 

Unfortunately, after dating for a little under a year, I broke up with her, as I had to move abroad to complete my college education, and I didn’t want to have a long distance relationship that might span years.

Yep. That was a big reason why I broke up with my English girlfriend, Katie. We had a lot of discussions about that in the podcast last year when she came, because a lot of people were like, “Why didn’t you guys stay together?” She was in school for like five, six years. She went to Bournemouth, the chiropractic college, which is one of the best in the world, but it was a long road for her to do it. I was like, “I don’t want to be long distance for the next five or six years.”

I also have to admit that I was not ready to commit to her in the way that she wanted me to at that time.

Yeah, I wasn’t ready to get married or settle down or any of that at the time. I just started the business that I have now. I went from just a year before making half a million a year to zero and had nothing but expenses.

This woman was so in love with me that I knew that if I stayed with her, I had to be all in. She was only the 2nd girl that I had ever been with, and in the back of my mind a part of me wanted to be single for a while…

This is where he wanted to see what the grass was like on the other side. He’d been with two women at that point in his life. Remember, one is no choice, two is a dilemma, three is a choice, but he had a lot more than three.

…And have the experience of dating other women before I settled down for good.

Yeah, you got a good head on your shoulders and you have a good approach towards it.

My girlfriend (Let’s call her “Jane”) was absolutely devastated, but eventually agreed. We stayed in touch over the years following the breakup. 

Fast forward two years, and I have completed my education and moved to New York City.

New York! “If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere.” Who doesn’t love Frank Sinatra? One of my favorite songs, “My Way.” Remember the late, great Steve McQueen, “I live for myself and I answer to nobody.” The creed of men.

I continued to apply the principles that you teach in 3% Man, and I had a crazy streak with the ladies!! For a period of about a year and a half, I was hanging out, having fun, and hooking up with a new beautiful woman pretty much every month. I finally got my wish: finding attractive women to date was pretty much effortless, even the kind of girls that previously I would have considered to be way out of my league. I met many women on the dating apps, but also took your advice and tried my hand at cold approach a few times.

On one occasion, I literally walked right up to a stunning Brazilian model on the streets of Manhattan and flat out said (With a cocky Corey Wayne smirk): “Excuse me! I don’t mean to bother you, but you are very beautiful, and I had to come over here and meet you.” This girl could not believe that I had the confidence to approach her in broad daylight, and we had a very good time. 😉 

Now that I had choice with women, I came to realize that for all of their beauty, many of these New York City girls lacked the depth of femininity that I experienced with my first girlfriend, “Jane.”

Me, Tarzan. You, Jane.

I started to realize that all the sex in the world is worth nothing compared to the soul connection that we shared.

Yeah, it’s like glorified masturbation. You don’t feel nothing for the girl, and you’re just not that into her. After the sex is over, you’re hoping she leaves. You’re looking forward to her leaving. That’s not what you want. You want somebody that you genuinely want to hang out with. You love being around someone who makes it easy for you and who brings peace to your life. Not somebody who disturbs your peace.

She lived several hours from NYC, and one day, on a whim, I called her. We spent a few minutes catching up, and then I asked her out on a date. 

To my surprise, she turned me down. This was a few years after our breakup, and she was dating someone new. I was devastated—The idea of her being with someone else was not a pleasant one. But I stayed in my center and told her, “If things don’t work out with the new guy, give me a call.” 

One of my best friends taught me that. Never burn a bridge. You never know.

I mean, in this particular case, he broke up with her because he wasn’t experienced enough. Now he’s had all this Baskin Robbins 32 flavors of ladies, and he’s like, “Man, that girl was pretty special. I’m going to give her a call,” and he did, but she wasn’t available. So he says, “Hey, if it doesn’t work out, get in touch.”

I then proceeded to follow no contact to the letter.

You got to be congruent with what you said. You let her know the door was open. You’d love to see her. Things are different. You’re done with school. You’re not that far apart from each other. I think there were a few hours apart.

For eight months I didn’t her from her at all. I continued to date new girls in NYC to distract myself, and focused on my career and going to the gym. 

Two months ago she texted me out of the blue with every woman’s favorite pickup line: “Heyy.” 

That’s amazing, girls can get away with like, the lamest of lame lines, but you know what? She’s hot. We don’t care. So what?

Today we are going out for a date on Valentine’s Day. I continue to listen to your newsletters every week, and apply the fundamentals in 3% Man. My girl is head over heels in love with me, buying me gifts, complimenting me…

She’s buying you gifts. She’s a giver. That is such a nice thing.

…Always loving and supportive, and helping me achieve my purpose.

That’s what you want. A woman who believes you, who admires you, who respects you, who pushes you to be better, who’s excited for you, who’s proud of what you do for a living, is your biggest cheerleader and fan. not some chick that’s constantly talking shit and trying to belittle you and demean you and make you look bad because she doesn’t respect men, because she didn’t respect her own father. You want a woman to treat you like this, easy going, easy to get along with.

I had my fun being single, but I could see a real future with this woman. 

Thank you for your work Corey. Thanks to it, I have the relationship of my dreams. More importantly, I have learned to embrace my masculine core in a way that no man in my life ever taught me to, and that is even more valuable. 

Yes, it unchains a man’s heart when you can help steal his spine. He can become pretty much invincible to the shit going on in the world. The world needs that more than anything, is men who know who they are, what they stand for, what they believe in and don’t have any kind of fear in their relationships or their family life. They just have nothing but strength, and you can’t fuck with those men.

I have younger brother, and one day I will share your book with him too, and look forward to modeling the type of masculinity that I wish I had learned from the start: kind, but dangerous.  

Thank you brother. 

Best, 

Bob

Dangerous, fast and lethal. I hope you guys enjoyed that success story.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.