What a high value woman wants, what turns her on and what turns her off, so you can attract the kind of woman you’ve always wanted.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a twenty-seven-year old woman who describes herself as being confident, playful, educated, attractive, fit, feminine, ambitious, approachable and playful. She describes how most guys she meets are beta males and also shares some valuable insights into the things they do and say that turn her off, so you can avoid making those common mistakes yourself when you meet a high value woman that knocks your socks off.
She also shares how difficult it is to find men who really get women and don’t talk her out of liking them, and asks what she can do to meet and date more of the kind of women she really wants. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of her email.
As a woman, it’s harder for me to date guys these days after watching your videos and reading your book.
(You’ve raised your standards. Becoming an awesome, successful human being is going to naturally attract people, because you’re putting out that leadership energy. The word ‘lead’ means to go first. You’re out there in front, doing what you’re passionate about, and other people recognize that success.
However, as Wayne Dyer said, “It’s never crowded along the extra mile.” The reality is, we’re all surrounded by people who major in minor things. Their life is all about mediocrity. So as you become more successful, and you climb the mountain, you realize there’s just not a lot of people up there on that level with you. There’s nothing really wrong with that, but like attracts like. You want somebody who’s on your level, so you can relate to them.)
I’m 27 years old, educated, cultured, attractive, confident, feminine, fit, ambitious, approachable, and playful. I’m not overly dramatic like some females, I’m level-headed, logical, and I don’t present with any red flags, at least I don’t think so. I’m self-aware and I have my emotional shit sorted out. I have a great social life, good, healthy relationships, and I’m pursuing a doctorate in physical therapy.
(A lot of guys are intimidated by women like that, especially woman who are more successful than they are.)
I’m going after what I want in life, and I’ve learned to live in this beautiful state of mind. Life is good, and I’m a motha-effin catch!
I meet a lot of men, especially at my boxing studio, and it’s fairly easy for me to chat and flirt with them. I get hit on a lot. I’m charming. I’m sexy, without being overtly sexual or trashy. I’m pretty good at telling when a guy is attracted to me by the way he looks at me and how he acts around me, and I’m usually right.
(Again, that’s because you’ve done the work on yourself. You’re a high achiever as well, and you’re just not going to settle for mediocre people or people who say what they’re going to do all the time, and then never follow through with it.)
However, most of these guys I encounter are beta male types you talk about in your videos. The second I sense a guy is unsure, hesitant, weak, or low confidence my attraction level for them drops.
(What is masculine energy? Purpose, drive, mission, succeeding, accomplishing, breaking through barriers, overcoming challenges and going for the things you want. It doesn’t mean you’re not going to feel fear. It just means you feel the fear, you go after what you want anyway, and you’re not attached to any particular outcomes. )
Sometimes guys will ask my friends to ask me out, or they can only talk to me if they’re intoxicated. I drop those guys REAL QUICK. Sometimes I wonder if I’m being too harsh or too picky, but as you say, attraction is not a choice. I hold myself to a high standard, so I expect the same for the men I date.
(If you’re looking for one really great person, why would you want to settle for mediocrity? I didn’t get to where I’m living by having a pattern of settling. I always want the fucking best. I expect the best, and I’m not willing to settle, even if it means I’m single for a period of time in between girlfriends.
The right kind of people will encourage you and support your choices. People who are jealous, weak, envious, and trying to sandbag your success are the kind of people I wrote about in my book, so you could learn from them. Sweep those people out of your life. If you keep people like that in your life, they’ll become like a giant boat anchor around your neck.)
I feel like I intimidate guys by the way I carry myself and how my friends speak highly of me. They tell people I’m going to be a doctor. It took me a very long time to reach this confident, well-rounded version of myself, but I feel like that scares off guys.
(My life is set up in such a way that only like minded people appreciate and value what I bring to the world. They’re going to want to stick around to hear what I have to say and tell their friends. I want the best of the best in every area of my life.
My life is set up to sort and qualify the right kind of prospects, the right kind of clients, the women I date and the friends I have. And those that don’t approve of it or don’t like it, it’s like… I don’t care. Like Lao Tzu said, “Care what other people think, and you will always be their prisoner.” Life’s too short to live it according to other people’s expectations.)
I can’t do much about turning guys into 3% men.
(It’s not your job to fix them or save them. Life is hard enough. What you need around you are people that are supportive, that love you for you, cherish you, celebrate you and rejoice in your success. Not the people that smile to your face and behind your back they’re talking shit.)
I pretty much just have to wait until I meet an equal. What do you suggest I do on my end?
(Continue to focus on becoming a better version of yourself. It’s all about your life and your lifestyle, how you set your life up and the kind of people you hang out with. Like attracts like.
If you tolerate douchebags anywhere in your inner circle, you’re communicating to the universe, send me some more douchebags. Those douchebags will keep you stuck in place, and they’ll also make you question what you feel in your heart and what you really want to do.)
I don’t want to compromise my values or standards, but I’m not having much luck with dating these days.
(That’s okay. It’s okay to be single. It’s okay to stay home Friday night all by yourself. How are you going to feel good about being with another person if you don’t like being with yourself? Set your life and your lifestyle up to where you can get up every day, enjoy your life and be proud of it.)
Looking forward to your advice. Cheers!
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“When you love yourself and you love your life, you radiate success, happiness, good vibes and will naturally and effortlessly attract attention from other high value people. Attracting the ideal mate, job, business, clients and friends are a direct result of becoming what you want to attract. Your life and lifestyle attract what you want naturally, without having to go out and find it. Yes, it’s true that you have to take advantage of opportunities when they present themselves, but the only thing that makes those opportunities possible is by doing the work on yourself first to become what you want to attract.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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