Hookup Girls Vs. Relationship & Family Oriented Women

How to spot the differences between hookup girls and relationship and family oriented women.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who has been following my work for about two years and only read 3% Man, twice. Since he didn’t take learning the material seriously, he confused a hookup and party girl with a relationship and family oriented woman.

This should be common sense, but he was so hypnotized by her looks, body and the sex that he was totally blind to the fact he was basically dating a stripper and a woman with severe daddy issues who came from a broken home. I give him a dose of reality. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Well, this particular email is a really good email because the woman that this guy got involved with is just like an absolute train wreck. When you see what she’s doing and how she’s behaving, these are the type of women that you always see on the red pill podcast that the red pill guys are always trying to say, “This is modern women. This is the dating pool out there.”

Back in my day, when I was growing up, when you came across a woman who behaved like this, I mean, she basically behaves like a stripper. Probably comes from a broken home. She’s got some daddy issues. When I was younger, I dated strippers. I had a good friend of mine who loved dating strippers. Anytime I mention this, it’s like, there’s always some stripper that a couple of them are watching me, they get mad and get upset. Typically, if you’re going to date women that behave this way, loyalty and being faithful just typically goes out the window. Most of the women that do those kinds of things typically tend to be absolute train wrecks. Not all of them, but the majority of them. You got to think in terms of if you’re looking for a good match. Especially if you’re family oriented, you got to make sure the girl’s got the same values and goals as you are.

With this particular guy, it’s clear that he’s totally hypnotized by this girl’s beauty and sex appeal, but he’s completely ignoring the reality that he’s trying to, in essence, turn a hoe into a housewife. He’s trying to fix this broken girl that came from a broken home, and it’s not going too well for him. So he ended up breaking up with her when he was drunk because she was doing inappropriate things, but they weren’t really together. They were just kind of dating. Then after he sobered up, he starts apologizing and chasing after her. Now he’s thinking he made a mistake.

Again, when I was younger, this type of shit was obvious to me. You know, when you see this kind of behavior, it’s like nobody wanted to date girls. Like, you might hook up with a girl like this a few times, but you’re not delusional enough to think this is going to be the mother of your children or somebody that you know you’re going to have a healthy, monogamous relationship with. Especially when he’s had conversations with her about what he expects, it’s like she’s just going to do what she wants. She’s got lots of men that are willing to validate her life choices.

Again, there’s hookup girls and then there’s family oriented type women. You got to make sure the girl’s got the value system, because the way this woman behaves, if the girl comes from a good home, loves her mom and dad, respects her father, respects his authority, the mother respects the father, and the other sisters respect the father, he’s the man of the house, he’s not some doormat beta male, they’re going to typically be family oriented and close and getting together, and doing family oriented things is going to be important. She’s not going to be taking pictures of her baloney curtains and putting them all over Twitter and Instagram and Snapchat and OnlyFans and other things like that.

Again, girls that do that typically come from broken homes. They don’t have a good, strong, masculine father that raised them properly. Again, like I said, when I knew this when I was young, this is common sense. You don’t confuse it. Some girls are for fun, some girls are for relationships. This is a girl for a little bit of fun. Obviously practice safe sex, but you don’t get involved in a relationship with somebody like this. This guy is trying to change her. Just because you have the book 3% Man, it’s not a manual on how to fix broken women. It’s to find the woman of your dreams, a good woman who you’re compatible with, who will be loyal and faithful to you. This woman’s behavior here, it’s like she ain’t going to be loyal and faithful to anybody. Again, she behaves like a stripper. It’s like, why would you try to wife up a stripper who’s obviously not going to be loyal to anybody? You don’t. It’s common sense, but common sense is not that common these days.

Viewer’s Email:

Hey Coach,

I’ve been following your work for almost two years now but only have read the book twice.

Another part of the reason is he’s not taking his success seriously. He’s not taking his life seriously, doesn’t really know the information, learned enough to get laid, but other than that, he’s not really paying attention, not even trying to vet this girl. He’s just projecting his fantasy of what he wants onto her. Meanwhile he completely ignores the reality. I mean, he’s totally delusional about this girl. I’m sure you guys will agree.

I know I have a lot more to go, but I want to get your take on a situation I found myself in for the last three months.

I matched with this absolute smoke show on Hinge early December 2023.

Again, in my experience, most women that come from good homes that are family oriented, they have a good social circle of friends and girlfriends, they’re always meeting great guys. They’re not going to be on a dating app. It’s just reality.

Typically people that are on dating apps, maybe it’s because they’ve moved to a new area and they don’t know anybody, but that’s a small minority. What you see is the majority of people that are on there are just messed up, broken people. It’s not all of them, but it just means there’s just a lot of crap you got to go through. There’s a lot of swiping, there’s a lot of texting and a lot of talking. To try to find somebody that’s a good person and a woman like this, if he had just asked a few questions or looked at her social media, he should have known never to get involved with her, but he didn’t care.

I am 34 and she is 31. I do some exploring on her social media. Her posts are almost all pictures of her in sexy poses, all done up in makeup and revealing outfits. Almost no posts with other people, friends, or family. Just “glam” shots.

There you have it. Unless she’s some successful supermodel or sporty girl that models bikinis or dresses or whatever, girls that are doing this or just acting like a stripper, basically. There’s a lot of social media platforms where those strippers can have a global audience and make a lot of money, instead of just stripping in a little place. They can strip globally on the internet, and there’s lots of thirsty guys that are willing to throw tons of money at them. All that does is validate their life choices.

Again, when you see something like this, you see your social media, you shouldn’t be like, “Oh, this is the perfect girl for me. Oh yeah, I want that.” Girls that are family oriented, they’ll have a few pictures here and there, maybe their dog, maybe their friends, their family there, they’re not spreading their legs in a yoga pose so you can see their bologna curtains or their camel toe. A guy who’s family oriented, if his daughter did that, he’d be fucking mortified. He’d be like, “Take that down!”

She also has a whole highlight reel dedicated to her taking shots at various bars and partying really hard. Another highlight reel dedicated to only selfies. It became clear that this girl is obsessed with social media attention.

Yeah, she didn’t get enough male attention from her dad growing up, and now she’s seeking it from wherever she can get it from.

Specifically, male attention. She has been single the past three years but has dated around a lot. I shrugged this off, thinking lots of women these days are all about social media, selfies, and secretly wanting to become an influencer. 

Again, when you see these kinds of pictures, the woman is behaving like a stripper. It’s so obvious, how can you not fucking see that? It’s like, “Hello?”

Fast forward to mid January, we have been hanging out 3+ times a week for a month. We’re obsessed with each other and banging like rabbits. We’re hanging out one night and after a session of the indoor Olympics, she says she needs to tell me something. She said that she loves her birthday because it’s the one day all eyes are on her.

Again, that’s daddy issue right there. “All eyes are on me. Everybody pays attention to me. It makes me feel special on my birthday.” In other words, she doesn’t feel special most of the time because dad was not around to make her feel special. You’re not going to fix that, bro. I mean, it’s so obvious.

I’ve been talking about this shit for years, and then you get involved with this girl and you’re like, “Uhh.” This is what happens when you’re a crappy student and you don’t take your life seriously. You get burned.

She said she tends to get really turned up and guys in the past have been off put. I say, “I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Well, on her birthday she went pretty off the rails, dancing on tables and getting on dudes she know’s shoulders.

Yeah again, family oriented girls are just not going to be behaving this way.

Not to mention her outfit was basically a thong covered by a see-through skirt. I let it go because she gave me a warning and technically we’re not exclusive.

Yeah, bro. You’re just fuck buddies, friends with benefits. He’s like, thinking, “I’m going to save her. I’m going to fix her. Captain Save-A-Hoe to the rescue! Today, we ride!” Captain Save-A-Hoe and his merry band of Save-A-Hoe rescuers have found a stripper and an OnlyFans girl. They’re going to change your life.

I thought that weekend was the end of it…

Dude, this is predictable. Character is destiny. It’s all over social media for you to come in there and think, “Oh yeah, I’m gonna erase all this. This girl is gonna completely become my ideal, and I can just ignore the reality that she behaves like a stripper. It’ll be great. This will be fine.”

Couple weeks later we decide to be exclusive, she’s really happy about it and we end up saying, “I love you,” to each other. I should mention that the week after her birthday, she got a boob job. This was no slight augmentation. She got WAY too big implants on her petite 5′ 3″ frame.

Again, these are daddy issues, bro. This is so obvious.

It looks more unrealistic than a barbie doll. Straight up porn star level.

You don’t try to turn a hoe into a housewife, bro.

When we were at a party, she started approaching men to show off her new boobs.

“Ooh, look at me!” “That’s just what I want in a girlfriend.” I’m sure she’ll be faithful and loyal. She can’t wait to go stick her big boobs in every man’s face to get some attention because again, daddy didn’t hug her enough and love her enough.

I finally got fed up and pulled aside to tell her that was crossing a boundary  for me. She apologized and just said, “Sorry, I’m just excited about them.” It seemed like she understood. 

I got a bridge that I can sell you, bro.

Last weekend she went on a bachelorette trip in Miami. The week leading up to this, I noticed a slight dip in interest from her. Please note that I never initiated contact first. The first night in Miami, shit hits the fan. She starts posting pictures of her in this outfit that is basically showing everything except her nipples and vagina.

Dude, you validated her by dating her and sleeping with her and agreeing to be in a relationship. You just thought all this shit was going to stop. Come on. That’s that’s is this is the the most delusional email I’ve gotten in a while.

It would put the sexiest lingerie to shame. She posts multiple videos of her dancing on tables in VIP section surrounded by dudes, rubbing and squeezing her new assets together in front of not just her own camera, but other dude’s filming.

Yeah, so you’re in an exclusive relationship, and she’s letting other men touch her boobs and her ass and everything. Yeah, that’s definitely the girl I’m gonna take home to Mom and Dad. She’s not like other girls. Come on.

I lost my shit and just replied, “Oh fuck that, I’m out. Bye.” She replied, “LOL are you kidding me?” I said, “Nope.” Granted, I was out with my friends too, also drinking heavily. 

Well that was the right response. You should not have agreed to be exclusive with her. This was a girl to hook up with a few times. If you’re having sex with her, you should definitely be wearing a raincoat. You shouldn’t have been raw dogging it, but more than likely you were probably doing that too.

The next day I sobered up and apologized but didn’t hear from her the rest of her trip.

Now he’s begging.

I went over to her place when she got back to talk. I told her her behavior on social media was wildly inappropriate and crossed so many lines.

Dude, this is who she was when she when you met her.

I said I could not be in a relationship with someone who acts and posts like that. I told her it made me feel like I’m not enough, and she requires the gaze and attention from multiple people (men) to be happy.

This is a girl with serious daddy issues. She obviously came from a broken home, didn’t get enough strokes as a kid, and you’re not going to fix that.

Again, I knew this shit when I was fucking 18, 19 years old. I would have never looked at a girl that behaved this way and thought, “Oh yeah, I’m totally gonna date her. This is totally what I want.” My friends would have been laughing their asses off at me. If I was like, “This is my girlfriend.” If I just hooked up or I’m like, “Hey, she’s hot. Nice job. Woo!” We’re high fiving each other and that would have been the end of it. Some girls were for fun, and even fewer girls are for relationships.

She did not acknowledge my feelings at all…

She doesn’t care. All these dudes are throwing their dicks at her. It’s like, she’s got plenty of options. There’s so many desperate, thirsty men in society, they’ll just keep validating her choices as being legit.

…And said that she isn’t going to change the way she acts or posts, calling  herself, “Outgoing, social and likes to have fun.”

That’s all it is. She’s a lying, cheating hoe and you tried to wife her up.

I am the same way, along with many other people, but they don’t act like that. I basically said that, “I guess that’s the end of it then,” and left. That was two days ago, and I haven’t heard from her since. I also heard a rumor that she has been sliding into a guy she used to hook up with DM’s recently. 

My question is, did I make the right move here?

Do you really have to ask? Really?

Does she belong to the streets?

She’s a fuck buddy, friends with benefits, sex playmate. That’s it. Always practice safe sex with a girl like this, but you don’t say, “Oh yeah, let’s be exclusive. Let’s be in a relationship,” and then she just continues behaving this way? It’s like, come on.

Or should she be allowed to have fun like that as long as she’s not cheating?

Dude, everybody’s touching her boobs when you’re supposedly in a relationship. She ain’t gonna be unfaithful to anybody. I wouldn’t believe anything she said.

Help me out coach, she’s super fucking hot so it was hard to walk away.

Bob

That’s the problem. She’s like Kryptonite to you. Most guys that haven’t had enough hot women will put up with this shit because they’re like, “That’s the only one who liked me.”

Seriously dude, don’t confuse the hoe with a potential housewife. It’s not even close. It is so fucking obvious that this girl is not relationship material. Again, this should be common sense, but unfortunately common sense isn’t so common.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.