How Texting Can Be Mysterious & Cause Women To Chase You

Aug 4, 2025 by Coach Corey Wayne
Photo by iStock.com/vijaifoon

How texting can be used to create mystery & cause women to chase you for attention.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a 55 year old viewer who says he got rejected because he didn’t listen to me. He felt he was smarter, had more charm and game. He only read 3% Man, twice, but didn’t take it seriously. He talked and texted a woman he really liked out of dating him. He shares the screenshots that reveal how his poor mindset had a negative influence on his actions that led to unnecessary rejection. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “How Texting Can Be Mysterious & Cause Women To Chase You.”

Well, if you’ve been following me for a while, you may have heard me say, when it comes to ladies, less really is more. The phone is for setting dates. And so we have a viewer who admits he didn’t listen to me, and now he wishes he would have because he’s got the sting of rejection. He’s my age, he’s 55, and he felt that he was smarter, that he had more charm and game. In other words, he was a know it all. He only read 3% Man, kind of went through it a couple of times, but didn’t really take it seriously. Because as he said, he thought he knew better.

So he met this woman that he really liked, and I think he said she’s like a CEO of a company or something very successful. And you could tell he sends his screenshots along, and it’s pretty clear he had a poor mindset. He had an approval seeking mindset and he just did not do things right. And it also looks like it doesn’t say, but from the text exchange, it looked because she says she felt “pressured”. Because she felt “pressured”, that tells me he’s probably getting upset that she doesn’t text back quick enough or he’s not satisfied with the response. He’s getting perturbed about it, and she’s just like, I don’t want to deal with this.

And just flat out rejected him just coldly. And then he’s like, “well, hey, what did I do wrong?” And so she tells him a little bit, but it gives us some insight. And so he realizes he just didn’t listen because again, he thought he knew better. And so he tried it his way, try to reinvent the wheel and got burned. So it’s a short email, but we got the screenshot, so we’ll go through it. These are just the basics. As the book says, if you’re new here, the book is free to read at UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just subscribe to the email newsletter. It’ll open up right in your web browser. So these videos are based on the assumption that you’ve at least read the book and you know the baseline fundamentals.

Photo by iStock.com/FG Trade Latin

And these are real world scenarios where guys are trying to implement the book. Or in this case, he’s completely dismissed it and now he’s dealing with the pangs of rejection. So hopefully you guys will, because he writes in he wants other people to learn from it and think that he’s hoping to keep somebody from suffering from the rejection that he’s feeling right now. In reality, as we’ve all been there. I mean, if you read the book, I’ve been there. And over the last 20 years I perfected this stuff. Tens of thousands of phone sessions and seeing how people implement it, how they do with it.

And a big part of the mindset that you got to have is that you’re trying to take women through measured steps. You’re just starting a courtship out slow. You don’t know her. She doesn’t know you. It’s a scientific fact that women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. If you do too much too soon, you call too much, you text too much, if you start treating her like a girlfriend right away, like it’s a serious relationship. Almost all women are going to bounce really quickly because it just comes off as needy and clingy. Because if you’re getting upset, you get mad that she doesn’t text you back quick enough.

Oftentimes, women will do that on purpose. They’ll leave you hanging for a bit. They’ll leave you on read and get back to you later just to see how you handle it. And if you get upset and you get angry that she’s not texting back quick enough, because if you’re getting angry, you presuppose that she doesn’t like you, that you’re going to get rejected because you fear being rejected. And what you fear, you attract and what you look at disappears.

Viewer Email:

Corey,

And he spells that Corey left off the E! I mean, it’s right in the book. It’s in all the Video Newsletters at the beginning. It’s everywhere. When I see something like that, you guys can’t even spell my name right. It’s like you’ve been following me for a while. That’s just a cherry picker. Not really taking it seriously. So this guy’s ego got in the way. So it’s just one little thing you notice.

I’m a long time listener and I purchased “3% Man“. I’ve only listened to it twice but need to do better obviously. At a minimum I’m 13 sessions short.

Photo by iStock.com/Diem.ph

Well, the most effective way is to get the audiobook, and there are links on my website and also in the video descriptions video on how to get the book. You can even get it for free by doing a free trial to audible. The links to that are also in the video descriptions video. But you want to listen to the audiobook on 2X, and then you follow along in a physical or a digital copy. Like the digital copy, it’s on my website. Or you can get a Kindle or an e-book version as well. And because you want your eyes to see the words as they’re being spoken, and you want to be listening to the words as you’re seeing them spoken, it’s the best way to really focus on the material.

If you just listen it through your EarPods or your speaker system in your house, or just listening in your car, or you got your headphones on, or when you’re at the gym, you’re just going to be distracted. You’re not really paying attention to everything that’s being said this way. If you put on 2X and you sit in a quiet room, just you, the book and the audiobook, your brain, your eyes, your ears are 100% focused on the material versus just kind of listening to the audiobook as background noise. The most effective way to learn it is to totally concentrate on the words that are being spoken, and seeing the words being spoken on screen or in a physical copy.

Because if you’re trying to be efficient, that’s the best way to do it. And the quicker you learn it, the more the less you’re going to make mistakes. Because again, this guy didn’t take it seriously. Look at me. He’s like, where’s this fucking guy now? I’m the same age as him. I know more than this guy. Who’s this punk on YouTube? A lot of people have that reaction. But even if you think I’m full of shit, if you apply what’s in the book, you’re going to get better results. Then you get on your own. Just like this guy tried it his way and now he’s lost a unicorn.

Anyway, look at the attached screenshots, and I really liked this woman.

So let’s go, I’m going to go through kind of just read. You can kind of get a feel for his mindset here. But this is her rejection test or text, I should say.

Hey Bob, thanks for reaching out. I appreciate everything you said in meeting you. However, our timing feels off to me. I would like to move on. Wish you the best.

That’s it. Have a nice life. See you later.

Wow. I’m not usually surprised, but I obviously respect your decision. Maybe you could help me and give me some insight. Not upset at all. I’m just looking for maybe a couple of specifics. Either way, I wish you the best.

Photo by iStock.com/Miljan Živković

Sure. I just felt pressure, like I needed to respond within a certain time frame.

So that there in and of itself tells me he’s probably getting upset with her. He’s not satisfied with how quickly she’s getting back to him. And again, women that have their shit together will do this on purpose just to see how a guy reacts. This dude’s 55 years old and he’s getting butthurt on text. Same thing teenagers do. Guys in their 20s, 30s, 40s. It’s if you don’t know any better and you’re upset, you come off as a little needy, clingy, Insecure. Remember the Thích Nhất Hạnh quote, “You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” And if you’re pressuring a woman, you’re getting upset with her. She’s not going to feel free.

And especially the average really attractive woman has been through this enough times with enough guys to know that it never gets any better, when the guys start getting upset in text. It’s a quick, easy way to weed out the guys that just lack confidence and don’t have emotional self-control. These are also the guys that blow up and get mad. They get angry. They get butthurt over the littlest things. And quite frankly, most women just don’t want to deal with it. They’ve seen it so much, especially these days in society. There are so many beta males, so many guys that have been brainwashed by what they see on TV and here in the culture. So back to my girl voice,

And originally that video I had responded to when you said if that is what happened, but I moved on from that and let it go.

So I don’t know what the video is. Maybe he again, that just sounds like he was constantly getting upset and butthurt and perturbed over the texting.

But I just started feeling pressure again. Sorry. Everyone is different on how much communication they want. You did nothing wrong. I just feel like our timing with communication is off.

Timing with the communication. Again, it just tells me that he was constantly getting upset because he didn’t feel she was replying in a timely manner, or he didn’t like how she was responding. If you want to turn a woman off quickly, if you want to dry her up drier than the Sahara Desert, start getting upset and mad at her. And how often or how quickly she texts back, or how long it takes her to text back. It’s the quickest way to get ghosted and blown off, because women just don’t want to deal with.

Photo by iStock,com/Carmen Ruiz alonso

If you’re needy, if you’re insecure, Her Mommy and Daddy didn’t give you enough hugs and I love you as a kid. They don’t want to fix you, especially at 55. A 55 year old guy should have a shit together by now, but they don’t teach you this stuff in high school. And so here. So he continues on. This is his reply back to that.

Honestly, the only time I was surprised was yesterday when he didn’t respond. Other than that, I was certainly not expecting a plethora of communication.

So again, it just looks like he’s getting mad. He’s getting upset because I guess the day before she didn’t respond, she left him hanging. Probably because he was pissed off.

It’s a shame because I really liked you and I thought if we spent some more time together, we could get very comfortable. But things don’t always work out as we both know.

So in other words, his whole mindset is approval seeking. Again, that’s the hallmark of a guy that didn’t get enough hugs and “I love you’s” from Mom and Dad. Case in point. I experienced that so I know how it affects you. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. And so its whole mindset is, “oh, I hope I can get this girl to like me.” And if you have the mindset of, “oh, I hope she’ll like me.” It’s usually because you’re used to girls not liking you that you really like, and that’s what causes you to be too forceful, you get upset, you get mad, you get better. Who’s this girl thinks she is? Why is she taking so long to reply?

Anyway, you have my number. I’m still charming if you ever want to reach out lol have a good one.

So he’s like hey, I’m a charming guy, you should like me. You should notice me. Again, it’s the complete opposite of the mindset in the book. Again, that’s somebody that thinks like that is. Again, it’s the guy that didn’t get enough strokes from mom and dad as a kid. Not calling the kettle black. I’ve been there, done that. I understand this because I was there once.

And I will end with this young lady. I do see what you are saying, and I usually really don’t communicate on the level I did with you. I was actually feeling that you wanted more communication, so I was reaching out more.

People pleaser it’s just beta behavior. Beta thinking.

Photo by iStock.com/id-work

At the beginning stages, we know so little about each other. I honestly didn’t want to lose you.

That’s more beta mindset. I don’t want to lose you. Oh, Stella, please.

By you thinking I had other women and other interest.

Women like you more. If they think you’re popular with the ladies. If they think you can’t get a date. What you just basically said was, “I don’t have anything else going on. I don’t want you to think I’m dating anybody else, Your Highness. Hopefully you pick me.” Does that sound like somebody that’s confident or not? Definitely not.

Anyway, obviously I read it wrong, and I can certainly use this as a learning tool. All the best, Bob.

Of course, she never wrote back after that. Maybe she reaches out in the future. Hopefully he goes No Contact, rides off into the sunset. But you can’t be needy and neurotic over text, even at 55 years old, it will turn women off.

I’ll send you a picture of me as well so you know I’m actually a really good looking 55-year-old man and she was a president of a company, and she was so into me.

Well, I don’t need the pictures of you in the gym with your shirt off. It’s like, you know, again, that’s more approval. Approval seeking kind of mindset, approval seeking behavior. That’s the kind of shit that got you rejected. You’re too focused on hoping that people like you, instead of showing up and having a matter of fact attitude of, “well, of course she would like me, why wouldn’t she? I’m incredibly handsome, sexy and charming. Why wouldn’t she?” But when you treat her like a celebrity, she’ll treat you like a fan.

But look how I ruined it. You told me to only use the phone and texting to set up dates. I thought I was smarter than you and more charming and had more “game” and I completely stepped on my dick. Maybe you could use this as an example on your show to others, because I knew the right thing to do but I just thought I was smarter. Live and learn!

Respectfully,

Bob

Photo by iStock.com/Nuthawut Somsuk

It’s like I’ve been doing this for 20 years, and I spent many years before that helping friends, family, after I had mastered this stuff. I didn’t have these problems anymore. I wasn’t chasing girls out of my life, getting butthurt over text or getting mad. They didn’t call me back soon enough. It’s like you have to go slightly slower than the woman, and if the woman is chasing you, she ain’t going to be dumping you or getting rid of you or blowing you off. But if you’re constantly getting up in your feelings and getting upset, you’re mad about the texting or the lack of texting, or she’s not texting back quick enough.

Again, it’s like all you have to do is just listen to our mindset is like, you could tell she was just annoyed. Like, even though this guy is 55, it’s he acted more insecure than a teenager trying to lose his virginity on spring break. It’s not good. It’s a bad way to go. And a woman, especially a woman that runs a company, she don’t want to deal with this. She wants the guys got her shit together. She just want to teach you how to be a man. So you live and learn.

Hopefully he’ll get back to actually reading the book and take it seriously and then apply it so he’ll see that stuff in there works. Because again, he tried to do it his way and he really liked this girl, but his mindset was wrong. His behavior was wrong. He wasn’t following the book. And so he predictably got rejected.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

If you haven’t already signed up for our Paying Exclusive Members Only Content and the video description of this video, there are links to join on YouTube or you can join on Spotify or our website UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just click the “plans” tab when you get there. And the good news is, with the website, you can do a seven day free trial and check out what content you get for your money.

And if you choose an annual plan, you get a 25% discount at the end of the seven day free trial. So go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the “plans” tab when you get there, or the link in the video description, and sign up for our premium exclusive Members Only Content so you can get all the extra Video Newsletters the replays, the live stream broadcasts that we do. And until next time, I will talk to you soon.

Get the Book “How To Be A 3% Man”

How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | FREE**
How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | $19.95
How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | $19.95
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
How to Be a 3% Man
Kindle eBook | $9.99
How to Be a 3% Man
iBooks eBook | $9.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Lulu eBook | $9.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
How to Be a 3% Man
Paperback | $29.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Hardcover | $49.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Paperback | $29.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Hardcover | $49.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Get the Book “Mastering Yourself”

Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | FREE**
Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | $24.95
Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | $24.95
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
Mastering Yourself
Kindle eBook | $9.99
Mastering Yourself
iBooks eBook | $9.99
Mastering Yourself
Lulu eBook | $9.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Mastering Yourself
Paperback | $49.99
Mastering Yourself
Hardcover | $99.99
Mastering Yourself
Paperback | $49.99
Mastering Yourself
Hardcover | $99.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Get the Book “Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations”

Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Audiobook | FREE**
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Audiobook | $24.95
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Audiobook | $24.95
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Kindle eBook | $9.99
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
iBooks eBook | $9.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Paperback | $49.99
Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations
Hardcover | $99.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Coach Corey Wayne Merchandise

If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: [email protected]

If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:

  1. Make a donation to my work by clicking here to donate via PayPal anytime you feel I have added significant value to your life. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck... $2... $3... $5... $10... $20... what ever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, videos, emails, newsletters, etc.
  2. Referring your friends and family to this website so they can start learning and improving their dating and relationship life, happiness, balance and overall success in every area of their lives too!
  3. Purchase a phone/Zoom (audio only) coaching session for yourself or a friend by clicking here. Download the Amazon.com Kindle version of my book to your Kindle, Smartphone, Mac or PC for only $9.99 by clicking here. Get the iBook version for $9.99 from the iBookstore by clicking here. Get the Audio Book for FREE $0.00 with an Audible.com membership by clicking here or buy it for $19.95 at Amazon.com by clicking here. Get the iTunes Audio Book for $19.95 by clicking here. That way, you'll always have it with you to reference when you need it most. Thank you for reading this message!

From my heart to yours,

Corey Wayne
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur

Published on August 4, 2025

Reader Interactions

Leave A Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

How To Support My Work
This is a member supported site. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck, $2, $3, $5, maybe $10? Whatever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, emails, videos, newsletters, etc.
DONATE VIA PAYPAL
Just click the "Donate" button above to enter your donation/gratuity. Thanks in advance for your support! From my heart to yours, Corey Wayne.
Share Page on Social Media:
How To Support My Work
This is a member supported site. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck, $2, $3, $5, maybe $10? Whatever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, emails, videos, newsletters, etc.
DONATE VIA PAYPAL
Just click the "Donate" button above to enter your donation/gratuity. Thanks in advance for your support! From my heart to yours, Corey Wayne.
Self-Help Products, Books, Supplements, Etc. I Recommend
1 Hour Phone/Zoom Coaching Session
Free eBook & Online Audio Program Access

How To Be A 3% Man

Mastering Yourself

Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations

Share Page on Social Media:
FOLLOW
DONATE
PRODUCTS
SHARE
top