How To Avoid The Frankenstein Boyfriend Trap

How to avoid the Frankenstein boyfriend trap of women who waste your time.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who got caught up in an online Frankenstein boyfriend trap of a woman who has a boyfriend. He’s 23 and has been spinning his wheels for 5 months in countless online conversations with a woman he’s never met. He wonders if he’s wasting his time on a fantasy since she hasn’t left her boyfriend but continually seeks his attention and validation, but won’t meet him in person. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “How To Avoid The Frankenstein Boyfriend Trap.”

Well, this particular email is from a viewer. I think he’s in Switzerland, if I’m not mistaken. And so he got all caught up in a I’m sorry, I don’t think he’s from Switzerland. I think it’s the next one, next video Newsletter. This particular guy met a girl because he plays video games. Started chatting with her in like, Discord. He’s 23. He’s been dating somebody, but he’s really not into her.

But yet over the last five months, he’s kind of got himself wrapped up in this fantasy of a girl he met online in the gaming community. He’s talked about meeting her, but as a little wrinkle to it, she happens to have a boyfriend. So it’s pretty clear he’s got sucked into her “Frankenstein Boyfriend Project” because he’s never met this girl in person. And yet, in his mind, they have a connection. They’re kind of exclusive with one another. Meanwhile, she has a boyfriend.

So these are the kinds of things that happen, especially some of the younger guys where they you know, we’ve talked about this a lot, especially in the live streams lately, about the younger generation just getting all wrapped up and caught up in online dating or on their cell devices. And when you consider that women have all the leverage on the dating app, like the other day in one of the live streams, we were talking about it and the girls were saying in just a matter of a few days, being on the dating app, she had 800 likes.

And so I asked the audience, the guys like, how many likes do you get on average? And most of the guys are like one, like a week, two likes a week, maybe 3 to 4 a month. Meanwhile, the girls are getting hundreds of them in days. So it just goes to show that the women have all the leverage. And so when people grow up and they spend too much time on the digital device and not enough interacting with other human beings and developing their social skills, they get socially stunted.

And so if they’re used to always being online and they’re really haven’t developed their social skills, but yet they want to meet somebody that they connect with, then you get into situations like this. Where they get all wrapped up in this fantasy of somebody that they’ve never even met, somebody that’s unavailable, that has a boyfriend, but yet they continue to think it’s a good idea to engage because it’s low risk. They don’t have to go out and risk rejection in person, those kinds of things.

So I see people, young and old, getting caught up in things like this. Getting kind of catfished online, if you will. And it’s just something to be aware of and to avoid. Because if deep down, you don’t feel like you deserve a relationship, or you don’t deserve somebody to love you, you’ll get wrapped up in something like this and sometimes waste months or even years of your life basically avoiding living, avoiding life. It’s just sitting on the sidelines, in essence.

Viewer Email:

Hi Corey,

I hope you’re doing well. My name is Bob, and I’ve been following your work for a while and read the book about 23 and listened to countless videos.

So it’s great that you read the book 23 times, but the most important part of that is you got to practice it. Without the practice, I mean, you can read the book a thousand times; it’s because you have to read The Book, apply what’s in it, get feedback, make mistakes, screw up, get rejected, get some wins. And slowly and surely, over time, as you continue to date and grow, you start to see what works and what doesn’t work.

And you start to see the patterns that are discussed in The Book showing up in your own life, which that builds your confidence and your competence. But if you just read and read and read and read and watch videos and cherry pick and never interact with women, or you interact with women online like this guy does, I mean, he spent five months of his life thinking that this is going to be his girlfriend. Meanwhile, she’s somebody else’s girlfriend and she has a boyfriend.

And it appears that she doesn’t have any, even though she hints at it, it’s like she kind of dangles the carrot just enough to keep a guy interested, because obviously her boyfriend is not giving her the emotional and the mental connection that she gets from this guy. So this is the Frankenstein Boyfriend Project that you want to avoid. Because you want to spend your time with women that are single and ready to mingle, and that like you. They’re ready, willing, able, and open to dating.

Not a girl who’s not happy with their boyfriend, but not happy enough to leave. And then somebody like this comes along and kind of fills what the boyfriend doesn’t give her. Meanwhile, she sleeps with the boyfriend, and then she gets the mental and emotional connection from you. And there might be other guys that take her to lunch and buy her dinner and buy her things when the boyfriend’s unavailable. It’s just a bad way to go. Because usually if she’s got a boyfriend and there’s at least one guy like this, there might be 2 or 3 others. There might be another guy that does favors for her. The Harry Honda kind that we’ve talked about.

I’m reaching out because I’ve developed a deep emotional connection with a woman online, and the situation has grown increasingly complicated. I’d really appreciate your insight. I am currently dating someone in my city at the same time but don’t have the same emotional connection as with this girl online. I met Jessica through an online game about five months ago. Since then, we’ve been talking almost every single day, both in-game and on Discord.

So you can see he’s a heavy gamer. Seven days a week he’s playing video games. So how much outside human interaction do you think he’s actually getting in his life? Probably not much at all. So he’s probably staying indoors and only talking to this girl and not doing much to really practice what’s in The Book. Because this is easy. This is safe. You don’t really have to risk anything. It’s all online. You don’t have to crash and burn in public by hitting on a girl or getting rejected publicly. Everything happens online and nobody knows about it.

Our conversations range from light-hearted and playful to deeply personal. We’ve talked about childhood memories, families, relationships, values, turn-ons, and even meeting up in person.

But the key is you’re talking about meeting up in person, but you’re not actually meeting up in person. Women vote with their feet. If they’re with you, they voted for you. And you’ll see this happen a lot where there’s always an excuse or reason she can’t meet. And then the guy gets all wrapped up in this fantasy, because probably he’s seen this in movies a bunch of times, that when you behave this way, eventually the girl leaves her terrible boyfriend, and then you live happily ever after like a Disney movie.

But it’s not how it works in the real world. In the real world, you’re just giving her attention and validation that the boyfriend doesn’t. In other words, you’re keeping her occupied while the boyfriend is busy doing something else. And then when the boyfriend is available, you don’t hear from her. And he’s the one beating up her pelvis and not you. You’re just beating your own meat in this case.

She initiates most of the contact probably 95% of the time if not more and sends me selfies regularly.

Think about this. She’s got a boyfriend and she’s sending you selfies. That’s not a woman that values loyalty, monogamy, exclusivity, family. Right away that should be a red flag. If you’ve read the Book 23 times, you’ve been following me for a long time or a short period of time, however long it’s been, and you watch lots of videos, you’ve got to know that that’s not a good way to go. It’s not a good approach.

We share music on a joint Spotify playlist, watch things together on TikTok, and spend long hours virtually hanging out sometimes until late at night.

Again Dude. What’s the Book say? The phone is for setting dates and here you are being her emotional tampon, doing the opposite what the Book teaches. It keeps you busy, but you’re not really being productive when it comes to creating a great relationship for yourself.

We’ve shared a lot of flirtatious moments, including teasing, virtual picnics, and even in-game intimacy like hugging, cuddling, and playful i.e.She’s a 10/10 but and Truth or Dare.

So sharing emojis and having a virtual relationship. It’s like, come on, man, that’s just not real. You’re living in a fantasy. It’s like the Asian guy, like especially Japanese dudes. They developed this cartoon character; they make this avatar and some of them even marry them. And then they interact with them as if they’re having a real relationship, because it’s much easier to interact with something digital than an actual human being in real life.

There’s a sense of exclusivity to our bond, but we’ve never met in real life. Here’s where it gets tricky: Jessica has a boyfriend.

You never try to mow another man’s lawn. Dude. Come on.

She hasn’t been clear about the status of their relationship and sometimes I get the impression she’s emotionally distancing herself from him.

The fact that, as soon as she says she’s got a boyfriend and you’re sitting there thinking it’s a good idea to be chit chatting constantly like this. That’s absurd. The Book is not going to help you if you read it and you do the opposite. The videos are not going to help you if you watch them, and then you do the opposite or you do the things it says not to. Because you’re five months down the road, and what have you got? Blue balls. Really bad blue balls.

She even told me directly “I spend more of my free time with you now” and once said she’d “go crazy if she couldn’t hug me”.

Yeah, but what has she done to actually hug you? Nothing. So you just dangle the carrot and you eat it all up?

She has told me that I look good and that she likes me. I know it only applies in the moment.

Well, at the end of the day, she doesn’t like you enough to meet you. And besides the point, you’re encouraging disloyal behavior. So the vibe you’re putting out into the universe is you want a liar, you want a cheater. You want a woman that’s not going to be loyal and faithful because you’re projecting your fantasy of your ideal woman onto this girl, and you’re ignoring the fact that you’re basically part of her Frankenstein Boyfriend Project because she doesn’t have this kind of a connection or much of a connection like this with her boyfriend.

So when she’s bored and got nothing to do, you’re keeping her busy. And then when Chad Thunder Cock, her boyfriend comes home, he’s the one sleeping with her, and living with her, or whatever it is that they’re doing. You’re basically the gay male girlfriend, the emotional tampon, and you’re eating up everything that she says to you about potentially things together in the future.

A week ago, she asked me if I wanted to meet in person. I said yes and suggested a date, but she got stressed and wanted to stop the conversation.

Remember, women vote with their feet. So what happened? Who did she vote for? She didn’t vote for you. So all she was doing is like, “oh, do you want to meet?” And he probably started trying to pressure her to make plans, and she didn’t. So that just shows you right there from her actions. She’s not serious about it. She got the attention and validated she wanted. And then she probably went and rode her boyfriend’s cock that night.

I respected her space and told her to take her time and get back to me when she figures it out. I’ve tried to remain centered and let her do the pursuing. But at times I wonder if I’m just a fantasy or escape for her or if there’s real potential.

You’re part of her Frankenstein Boyfriend Project, dude. If she really wanted to meet you, she would have met you. That’s why she doesn’t. Because she’s not unhappy enough to where she’s going to leave her boyfriend. And some of the things she’s not getting from him she gets from you. And all she has to do is dangle the carrot and you’re jumping through your butt trying to please her.

I let her bring up the topics of relationships, kissing, threesome, that sort of subject. then I just do some follow up questions keeping it around the same level.

Again, this is somebody else’s girlfriend, dude. I mean, this is so absurd.

At this point, I feel emotionally invested, and part of me wants to believe that this connection could lead to something meaningful. But I also know she’s still with someone else, and it feels increasingly inappropriate at times.

It should have been inappropriate as soon as she told you she had a boyfriend. When she told you she had a boyfriend, you just said, “hey, you know, I’d be down to talk more, but you got a boyfriend. And so these conversations are kind of inappropriate. Hit me up if it doesn’t work out.” But instead, you’re constantly trying to rip off this guy’s girlfriend, and you’re not getting anywhere.

Because men who love and value themselves and who have choices and options, they’re not going to get involved in something stupid like this. If the girl’s not down to meet, they’re on to the next. They’re not going to waste their time and spend countless hours, up all hours of the day and night playing video games online. You’re just escaping from life. You’re on the sidelines watching it zip by.

I’m torn between stepping back or continuing to play it cool and see what happens.

Well, you’re not really playing it cool, and if I were you, I would take a step back.

What would you do in my situation? How would you interpret her behavior, and what’s the best way to navigate this while keeping my self-respect intact?

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

Best regards,

Bob

Well, dude, you already lost your self-respect. So it’s not intact. You look like a chump. You look like a simp. It’s not a good way to be Dude. This is not the masculine thing to do. This is not what I teach in my Book and what I teach in my Videos. So you’re involved a woman that’s clearly not somebody that’s a good girlfriend candidate. And you’re wasting your time. And what you should be doing is just saying, “hey, until you’re single and you’ve resolved your situation completely with your boyfriend, it’s just not appropriate for us to be talking like this.

If we see each other online on a game, we can chat in the context of the game. But I’m not going to be doing long phone calls and stuff like that. It’s just it’s not going to happen.” And besides, I don’t know if he’s even done any video chatting with her. It sounds like she’s just sending pictures so he could be talking to a dude for all he knows. He doesn’t really know what he’s dealing with. He could be totally getting catfished. So you got five months of your life invested in this. You are dating somebody in the real world, or at least he says he is.

You should be focusing on women that are single and ready to mingle and not be encouraging this kind of disloyal behavior. Because like attracts like. People who like the same things tend to like each other. You attract how you act. And everything you’re doing is communicating that lying, deviousness, cheating is what you encourage, and what you invite and what you want in your life. And the universe is going to respond accordingly and send you more women like this. So if she cheats on him with you, then eventually when she’s unhappy with you, she’ll cheat on you with somebody else. It’s just the way it is.

You should know that by now. And you should know better. Interact with women in the real world and stop wasting your fucking time with chicks that you’re just keeping them busy while their boyfriends away, and then as soon as their boyfriend gets back, they’re like, see you later. And then they’re going and sleeping with their boyfriend, and then you’re sitting there with blue balls and jerking off to porn or whatever it is that you happen to be doing. Have some self-respect, dude, because the way you behave, you don’t have any.

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