Here’s how to get women in bars, night clubs, public places, social functions, etc. to approach you and your friends first. Before I tell you how to use it, I want you to understand the mindset behind this. You and your friends must all agree to do this together because if one person does not have the same physiology and body language, women will not approach your group.
The object of going out is not to meet or get girls. This is the most important part. You and your friends should go out with the goal to make each other laugh and have a good time. That’s it.
When you get to the bar or social event, find a high traffic area where you and your friends can be near the bar for easy access to drinks and the women that will be walking by your group.
As far as you and your friends are concerned, it’s your party and you have fun where ever you go and are. Focus on your friends and making each other laugh and have a good time.
Don’t walk around the bar looking. It makes you and your friends appear that you are like every other guy in the place that is trying to meet someone but never does. Guys that have choice with women know that women come up to them all the time. The hardest thing they do is decide which girl to spend their time with.
How would you and your friends act if women approached you all the time? If women not only approached you but asked for your phone number or gave you theirs without you having to bring it up?
I know this, you would not be hungry or running around the bar approaching women. Why? Your phone is already ringing off the hook with girls wanting to see you. The only frustrating thing is trying to decide who you really want to see the most.
Guys that have lots of women in their lives don’t have to run around chasing them.
So act as if this kind of thing happens all the time. Act as if women are always hitting on you and that every evening always ends up with you deciding who you want to go home with.
DO NOT hang in the back corner with the groups of guys holding their drinks in front of their body. Everyone avoids them in these places, especially the women. It’s like the insecure men who are unsuccessful with women all congregate together.
Don’t lean against the bar or a column or a wall. Be near or next to where everyone is walking by.
By putting yourselves in high traffic areas away from things to lean against it communicates that you and your friends are comfortable with yourselves, confident and fun.
Try to keep your arms down at your sides with your beers or drinks in your hands. Keep your chest out breathing into it. Stand and look confident the way I teach in my book. Smile, and make eye contact with everyone. Keep your hands out of your pockets. Touch your friends on the shoulders as you would with anyone you are comfortable with and close to. It communicates that you are fun, friendly and approachable. EVERY woman in the place will take notice of you and your friends.
Put your weight on one leg and keep the other one out stretched in a comfortable position (60 degrees perpendicular to the one you have your weight on) as if you are taking up too much space. Don’t rock back and forth. Act like you own the place. Seriously, if everyone there was a guest at your bar, night club, or social event how would you act? How would you stand?
You would be very comfortable, you would look comfortable, and you and your friends would radiate this. Everyone, especially the women would notice this. Women like confident men or men that look like they are confident.
Now for the fun part. As a consequence of you and your friends looking like they are the most fun and most confident group in the whole place, women will naturally feel attraction and feel comfortable walking over or walking by hoping to join in the fun.
So what do you say when a group of beautiful women walk by? Make sure they are willing to smile and make eye contact at you. If they are not then just ignore them and let them walk by until some walk by that do look you in the eye. Here are some easy openers… Hey, what’s up? How are you? How’s your evening going? Are you guys having fun? What are you guys up to tonight? Have you guys heard of any new fun places to go lately?
This is important; even if they are ugly be friendly. Talk to them for a few minutes just to practice and then when you want to move them along you can just say “well it was nice meeting you, enjoy the rest of your evening” and then turn back to your friends and continue having a good time.
After a while the other women will notice that you and your group seem to know everyone, because so many women are coming by. They will feel compelled to come over and see what all the fuss is about.
This communicates to the other women there that you are popular with women. That means you have high status and are successful with women. Then more of them will come over to say hello.
Remember as I say in my book, the ones asking the questions are the ones in control of the conversation.
Here is another good tip on how to not be affected by the beauty of the women you are talking to. At some point no matter how amazing you think a woman is, you will get bored of her. Well how would you act if you were already bored with her? If you realize the truth that you will get bored with every woman at some point, if you act as if it’s already happened, then the intimidation factor of her beauty will melt away.
Make sure to use your hands and laugh and just have fun. After a while you may catch yourselves not smiling or staring at a tv, etc. As soon as the energy of the group changes from being fun, smiling, and laughing to everyone zoning out you will feel it. So will the women, because they no longer will be coming up to you. Simply go back to having fun and joking and they will start coming over again.
You will come back to this goal throughout the evening. It’s natural that you and your friends will settle back into your normal routine. It happens to everyone, so when it does just remind your friends of the mission. The mission to just have fun with each other. Meeting some women is just a bonus, but not the goal. Try it! You don’t have to do shit! Its the lazy man’s way to pick up chicks 🙂 Everyone is always STUNNED at how well this simple technique works the first time they try it!
As a matter of fact, bookmark this page and come back to it often. It ALWAYS works! Take it with you in your smart phone so you & your buddies can refer to it during the night.
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:
From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Sometimes you gotta create what you want to be part of.” – Geri Weitzman