How to lose your fears of approach anxiety & other people so you become confident & more successful with women. We tend to fear the unknown. Our fear of doing something is always worse than actually doing it. What you fear in life, you attract into your life. What you look at disappears. Fear causes most people to run and try to avoid what they are fearful of. However, when you understand the law of attraction and how the universe works, you realize that when fear drives you it actually drives you to attract more and more of what you fear, which is usually very undesirable. Men who are insecure or unsure about themselves and where they stand in their relationships with women, will do and say things from a place of fear as they try to avoid what they fear most, which is rejection.
Unfortunately, and without realizing it, they will actually attract and cause what they fear most to happen… rejection. They don’t realize it, but when they speak and act from a place of fear, they are communicating that they don’t feel worthy to be with the woman they are fearful will reject them. Therefore, what they fear they attract. The only way to dissolve and conquer your fears is to move towards what you fear and do what scares you most. For a lot of guys, talking to women is terrifying. The following is an e-mail from a guy who is not only afraid of women, but people in general. He’s also fearful he is weak and can’t defend himself or protect a woman. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:
I’m often anxious just going about daily tasks. Even things I have done millions of times. The fear is far less with those things than in my early 20’s because I’ve worked at it, but it’s still there despite repetition. I wonder if I’m better to master daily tasks on my own using ideas you mentioned so I do them with low levels of anxiety, and then think about dating once I’ve achieved that. Thoughts? (You are letting fear use you instead of using fear to help motivate you to take action. Flip the fear script by asking yourself “what are the consequences of not working to improve my skills? What will this cost me in 6 months, 6 years, etc. if I don’t take the action I know I need to improve my skills so I am no longer fearful?” You’re looking for excuses to not practice your skills with women and improving your social skills in general.
YOU MUST PARTICIPATE IN YOUR OWN RESCUE. Find a way, not a way out!) Also not feeling physically safe at night is a problem for me. Worried I can’t protect myself. Would confidence in general help with that? (Yes, but confidence is nothing more than doing something you know how to do and doing it really really well. Confidence comes from success. Success comes from taking action so you learn. You may want to consider Martial Arts. I would recommend Aikido as it is a martial art practitioners can use to defend themselves while also protecting their attacker from injury. Aikido is performed by blending with the motion of the attacker and redirecting the force of the attack rather than opposing it head-on. Martial Arts will help center you and balance your energy so you don’t feel so fearful.)
I’m thinking if I can’t do daily tasks with a reasonable level of confidence on my own, how the hell would I be able to impact a date in a positive way? (I believe you are simply looking for an excuse to do nothing because you are afraid of rejection. The bottom line is most women are not going to like you. You will get rejected more than you get accepted. It’s a numbers game. Until you start practicing your skills in the easy and low risk ways I teach, you’re not going to get any better and your success with women will still be non-existent. You miss 100% of the pitches you don’t swing at! Once you start practicing what I teach, you will start to see that your fear of talking to people is far worse than actually doing it.) Just being on a date would raise my already strong feelings of anxiety. (Well, then you should get used to being single the rest of your life and watching guys like me have all the fun. You can’t help but feel a little nervous on a first date; all guys feel it a little, even me.
Repetition is the mother of skill. No practice = NO PROGRESS = NO PUSSY!!! Feel the fear and do it anyways.) I’d find it hard to convey I could protect her, when I have concerns about whether I can protect myself. (It sounds like you don’t feel any physical safety in your body either. Network Chiropractic Care will help you feel safety in your body. CLICK HERE to find a level 3 certified Doctor near you; don’t go to any Doctor who is not level 3 certified. Network Care will change your life. It’s the single greatest confidence booster and personal growth modality I’ve ever encountered. You can see what just four days of Network Care adjustments and my coaching can do for a man’s confidence by watching the TV show I did several years ago with one of the best Network Care Doctors in the world, Dr. Dominick D’Anna. He explains how it works and what it does. It’s the worlds most cutting edge Chiropractic Care that gets results like nothing else! The TV show is located in the website sidebar located to the right in the box titled: “From Dud To Stud In 4 Days.” You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.)
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“What you think, and what you feel, and what manifests, is always a match.” ~ Ester Hicks