How To Properly Set Dates

Apr 26, 2012 by Coach Corey Wayne

Here’s how to be direct & properly set dates when women you’re dating or ex’s contact you. It’s important to understand that when women you are dating or ex’s initiate contact with you, they’re simply trying to make it easy for you to create an opportunity for sex to happen. Women are not going to do everything for you. Most women are not going to come right out and ask you out for a definite date. Women still want and will wait for a man to be direct and make a date with definite plans. I see a lot of guys who write to me and some of my phone coaching clients making similar mistakes when it comes to setting dates. They seem to struggle to understand the difference between hanging back and being direct to get what you want. So they sometimes hang back when they should be setting a definite date by leaving plans up in the air. Often the conversation will end with no date set and the guy feeling frustrated. The following is an e-mail from a reader who has done a great job of moving on with other women after he got dumped. However, the ex who broke up with him has started texting him recently after four months of no contact. She brings up getting together so they can “wrestle” which communicates she’s thinking about being physical with him again. The problem is he’s not being direct and setting a definite date and therefore, they still have not gotten together again. With a few subtle tweaks to his approach, she should be jumping his bones soon! My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:

Corey,

Have read your book several times and have been applying the methods at every opportunity. About 7 months ago my girlfriend of 4 years and I broke up. She was unhappy as I was acting needy and jealous. She wanted distance, space and time apart. It turned out just a few weeks later she was dating someone new. (She had him lined up to take your place already more than likely.) I chased for a few months with no success and that’s when I stumbled across your book. (Chasing women guarantees rejection!) Since then I have not contacted her, reached out to her, or truthfully even really thought much about her. (Good for you! Most guys really struggle to do that which inhibits their ability to quickly rebound and move on with other women.) I have been dating and meeting many different women. About 3 weeks ago I get a text message and its from my ex, wanting to just say hello and see how I am. (I’m SHOCKED… SHOCKED I tell you LOL!!! Funny how well walking away and never looking back can bring an ex back, sometimes months later.) I waited a day and then responded kindly and flirted a bit. Cut the conversation after a few minutes and said, “nice talkin to you.” About a week later she texted me again. Again she was flirty and started even talking sexual… saying things like “I want to wrestle, I need to show her new moves, etc.” (See, when you cut the conversation short the first time she contacted you, she had to work a little harder to communicate her intentions to you a week later. She was more direct and revealed more of her cards because you hung back and were patient. Nice job!) She was headed out on a vacation so I said when u come back I will allow u to seduce me. (You could have also said, “If you’re really sweet and charming, maybe you’ll get lucky.”) She came back last week and texted me again. This time she wasn’t as sexual and a bit less flirty, (She was probably testing you because you are confusing her with your new behavior to make sure you really are different.) but none the less she reached out to me instead of me chasing her. I attempted to arrange a date, she said she was busy on Thursday. (It works better if you ask, “What days are you available to get together?” Then let her answer and pick one you also are available. If you pick a day to ask her first, then you must wait for her response. When she just says, “I’m busy” and offers no other day, you should have said, “maybe some other time. Keep in touch.” If she really was ready to see and seduce you, she would have offered another day she was available. If her interest was low, or some other guy is also in and out of the picture, she would have just said, “ok” without bringing up another day to get together.) I said, “well I’m busy most of the weekend, but if Sunday works for you let me know.” She said ok, but then I never heard from her once Sunday came. (That is because you left things up in the air without being direct and making a definite date for her to come over to your place.) This week again she texted me hello, but once again pulled back her sexual and flirtatious vibe. I said I was busy, but if she wanted to come over and hang out to call me. (Stop leaving it up in the air!!! She is contacting you because she wants you to act like a man and make definite plans, not just throw it back into her lap for her to call you again and make plans at some unknown point in the future. She calls you to make herself available to you in hopes you will know what to do and do it.) I’m pretty confused as to what she is up to and not sure what my next move should be. (Simple, MAKE DEFINITE PLANS FOR HER TO COME TO YOUR PLACE next time she contacts you.) Should I be super alpha male aggressive and tell her “don’t make any plans Tuesday, you’re all mine” (no, read my comments above.) or should I continue to suggest hangouts on dates I am available and let her say either yes or no? (Ask her what days she is available instead, and then pick one of those so you can get together and she can wrestle with you like she wants which is really code for “I want you.”) She continues to reach out to me so I assume she is looking for sex or attention, but how do you suggest I proceed? (BE DIRECT. Make plans for her to come to your place so you can make dinner together.) I would like to spend some time with her soon. (Stop blowing the opportunities she’s giving you then.) But I refuse to chase her. (SMART!!! You must let women come to you at their own pace which you are doing. However, you’re fucking up by being vague instead of direct and to the point when trying to set a date with her. Modify your approach like I mention above and she’ll probably be over soon. You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.)

Thanks!!

Mike

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“Wise men who are successful with women let women come to them at their own pace. It’s using your powers of masculine attraction vs force. Force never works with women, it only repels them.” ~ Corey Wayne

Published on April 26, 2012

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Sir,
    I have been reading your book ” How to be a 3% man”, it’s excellent and reflect the current psychology of women. One small doubt, while setting dates when we use ” take away or negative sale ” policy , women are giving a date , that’s fine . But some women are not doing that “Wholeheartedly ” , they are doing only out of fear of losing this dude. But inside somewhere they are still uncomfortable , and that can be reflected in their words . Can we make a positive impact on such women if we proceed with date or let us wait until she is 100 % interested ? Please clarify Sir.

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