How to improve your success with women and discover what your life purpose is.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email success story from a viewer who has been following my work for about six years. He shares how he originally came to me for love advice, but once he got into my work, he started bettering himself in all areas of his life that were important to him.
He shares how this led him to go to college, almost flunk out, but eventually graduate and get his dream job making even more money than he expected. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.
This email success story is six years in the making. This particular guy started following me when he was 19, and like a lot of guys, he came across my first book, How To Be A 3% Man, because he was trying to improve his success with the ladies. But, obviously, once he got into my work, he really went through a lot of things that I discuss in Mastering Yourself, and even more recently in Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations- Volume I, which ties the concepts in both books together. And it’s been an interesting journey for him.
He ended up going to college. It doesn’t seem like he expected to go to college or even was considering it, but it’s just interesting how, as he got into my work, that it stimulated the ideas that he had and his purpose and his mission, kind of the process of discovery. So, it’s really cool, because the thing that’s difficult for a lot of people that come to my work, they’re looking for the quick fix. They’re looking for the magic pickup line. They’re looking for the magic set of phrases or words to say to a woman to solve all of their problems. And the things I teach are not a quick fix.
If you’re overweight and out of shape, it’s going to take time to eat healthy, to get in shape, to do that routine. Like in this guy’s case, he decided to go to college. That’s not something that happens in a couple of days or thirty days. It’s something that takes several years, usually four years for most people, if you’re getting a four-year degree. And so, the point being is that great things take time in life, especially when it comes to your purpose.
Guys that are just looking for a quick fix, if you’ve been following me for a while and you listen to the emails I do, it’s usually the guys that only read the book once or twice or three or four times over several years and really just kind of half-assed it that are the ones really struggling. But guys like this, that immerse themselves in my work, that read the books 10 to 15 times and then apply it over the course of many years, (in this particular case, six years), you completely transform your life and your body and your income. Because he just got a nice big fat raise by the company that he’d always wanted to work for. They offered him a job, because he became exceptional at what he’s doing.
And so, great things take time. Most people are lazy, and they’re not willing to take the time. They want the quick fix. But I’m here to help the people that are willing to put the time in, put the effort in, day in, day out, week after week, month after month, year after year and decade after decade, because most great things take a decade or more to really come to fruition. And you really get a sense of that in my second book Mastering Yourself, because I go through my whole autobiography, if you will, of all the ups and downs, and careers, and jobs, and businesses that I’ve had over the years and this journey that I started when I was very young –just following my heart, my curiosity and my intuition, like Steve Jobs talked about, and trying to just see where that would lead me.
Discovering your purpose is not something, for the overwhelming majority of people, where you just read a book or see an article somewhere and go, “Oh, great. Now I know what I’m going to do for the rest of my life.” Because even though you may choose to do something today, five years, ten years, fifteen years, twenty years from now, you might not have the same internal enthusiasm and you’ll want to do something else.
So, you have to have a strategy, a life strategy, if you will, what I like to call the fundamentals of the science of high achievement. It’s finding a way in using your mindset to motivate yourself on a daily basis to do things when you don’t feel like it. When you’ve been at something for many years and you don’t see the results you want, it’s easy to quit, it’s easy to give up. But if you love it and you’re committed to it, you stick with it. You keep studying other people that are ahead of you or more successful than you and trying to learn what they’ve done successfully.
And you’ll see, because he had struggled when he was at college as well, he surrounded himself with guys that were smarter than him. He started hanging out with the smart dudes, because he was really struggling in school. And then he learned from them and saw what they did differently. So, this guy has done a great job of learning from me and applying these principles, and his life now is an example of the results of those. Hopefully, it’ll inspire some of you that are watching this to do the same thing in your own lives.
I hope you are doing well because God knows I’m doing FANTASTIC as I write this email. When I first found your work, like many others, it was after a nasty breakup from my first ever relationship. Even though I came to see how to get my ex back, (which I did for a year), what struck me was your talk about passion, masculinity, and self-sufficiency.
At the end of the day, what I teach are the principles of self-reliance, how to rely on yourself, how to make your life the way you want it. Because the reality is nobody’s coming to save you. Nobody’s going to fix your life for you. You have to do that yourself.
At 19 years old, no one has ever talked to me about bettering myself, self-improvement, reading books, and just improving oneself in all areas. Actually, at the time, I had no real goals for myself because I was so scared of the future.
Well, what you were lacking was a plan and a strategy, i.e. the fundamentals of the science of high achievement, which “How To Be A 3% Man” teaches, really goes into detail in “Mastering Yourself,” and then “Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations,” ties all of those concepts together. And you can read all of these for free at UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just subscribe to the email newsletter.
I took everything day by day since I didn’t know what to do with my life. After a year of reading and self-reflection, I decided to leave my girl, family, friends, and comfortable life in Texas to go to school in Orlando becoming the first in my family to go to university. My degree? Mechanical Engineering!
Boy, there’s a lot of math and science in that degree. Not easy math, lots of Calculus.
The first few years were not easy. Just like how you talk in your book, I struggled A LOT with the basic math and sciences. By following the techniques of the smartest kids and studying with them, I went from almost failing out to getting all A’s after 2 years of adjustments.
I talk about that a lot, because that’s one of the strategies to succeed in life – modeling the success of other people. In other words, find the people that are the most successful in your field or your career, or maybe the business that you want to go into if you’re an entrepreneur, and getting to know them. Either go to work for them, pick their brain over coffee or dinner or an office meeting, and find out what the differences are that make the difference. What do they attribute their success to? What are their day in and day out activities like? What is their mindset like?
Because you learn from them, or you learn from somebody like myself. I mean, I’m 52 years old now, I’ve been doing this stuff for decades, so I have a lot of life experience seeing these slow results, (because the results are always really slow in coming), to see what those are. I’ve learned what works and what doesn’t work. And so, a guy like this who’s 19, came to me six years ago, he gets the benefit of all of my life experience – all of the strategies that worked, all of the fuckups I made, and the mistakes I made, and what happened because of those fuckups. He gets to learn from all of those, as if he had experienced them himself.
And so, instead of this taking until he’s 52 to figure it out, he’s now 25. I’m really kind of jealous and envious this guy, to be 25 and to know all of the things that he knows now and to have all of the successes that he’s had. He’s way more successful at his age than I was at his age, especially in the ladies department. To condense your life and shorten the amount of years it takes to learn the things that you need to learn, to become competent as a man, to become outstanding as a man, to become amazing and exceptional at what you do for a living, it’s like, most people never figure that out. They never get to that level in life. And here’s a dude at 25 that’s done that.
These kinds of emails are the kinds of things that make me happy thinking about all of the struggles and things I went through, because this guy was able to learn from it at his young age, (he’s half my age, basically), and shave all of that learning curve off and have nothing but experiences. Because he’s just following the fundamentals of the science of high achievement and getting the same predictable type of results that I got. But it obviously took me a lot longer to figure this shit out. So, these kinds of emails, it makes everything I’ve gone through in life worth it. This guy’s life is better because he learned from all of those experiences as if they were his own.
All while this happened, I was dating a lot because what you teach freaking works. I think during this time, I read and listened to your book a total of over 20 times on my commute to school.
It’s always the same thing, 15, 20 times. The guys that study it the most get the best results.
Dating became very easy, because the girls who like you make it easy.
Yeah, I didn’t realize until my thirties that in my teenage years and my twenties, I spent most of my time talking women out of liking me that really already liked me. But I didn’t know what I was doing wrong, I didn’t know how unattractive my behaviors and my words were.
I found the most value on how to set dates and how to have a perfect date. Even though dating was easy, I never pursued a relationship with them, since I always thought these girls were never better than the ex I left back in Texas.
The last 3 years were golden, since all the hard work started paying off. I finally got into the College of Engineering and started getting internships. For the first time in my life, I started making a lot of money, and that allowed for better opportunities in all avenues.
Yeah, because now he’s got an abundance. He’s got an abundance of job and career opportunities. That gives you a little bit of swagger, makes you a little cockier than you would be otherwise. And it’s always better to have choices than to have no choices. But at the end of the day, he took action and he created these choices for himself. That’s the important thing. He did the work. He trusted the process that he learned from me, and he applied the process. He’s getting predictable results.
With the cash, I got a gym trainer, traveled more, grew my social circle, and weighed my professional options. It might be weird saying this, but the COVID years were the years I grew/dated the most. So, as I became better, so did the girls in my orbit. They were no longer girls from the internet, but badass women. I’m saying girls who make 6 figures, nurses, girls who could be models in Miami, and girls finishing med school. Even the girls who I friend-zoned in my engineering clubs were being more forward.
I finally met my girlfriend about a year ago. It’s crazy how this woman shares almost all the qualities I wrote down in my list. She’s finishing med school, she’s the funniest person I know and my best friend. The relationship has been super easy and happy. We have not had a single fight, and when we met, she was still a virgin.
Men who understand women don’t argue with them. But you’ve got to have a woman who’s easygoing, easy to get along with and who likes to communicate.
Sexually, I can’t believe how easy it is to set her off. She is always initiating intimacy and is always trying to win me over.
Yeah, this guy is really suffering through that. But he did the work on himself. And his girlfriend knows that he’s a hell of a catch, because, obviously, he had the best coach.
I’m also an engineer now, working off the Space Coast. I love my job since I’m growing a lot, but recently my dream company made me an offer. If I were to accept, I would be making $40k more than I did a year ago.
Hmm, imagine that. Another thing I go into, especially in extensive detail in “Mastering Yourself,” is teaching you the art of negotiation. Because if you think of it from this perspective, if you’ve got three or four or five companies that want to hire you, you can pit them against each other. Just like what we used to do when I was in real estate. You submit an offer, and sometimes the seller would come back and say, “Hey, we’ve got multiple offers. Submit your highest and best offer, and we’re going to pick the best one.” That creates a scarcity mindset in the person trying to buy, therefore, sometimes they bid more than they should.
But if they’re really motivated to hire somebody, if you’ve got multiple people after you, wanting to hire you, then you’re obviously more valuable. And so, the companies work harder to get you. And then, once they do get you, they feel like they really got something special. Just like a woman who was able to get you to choose to be with her over all of the other options, versus a guy that has no options and he’s just hoping to get some scraps. It’s always better to put yourself in a position of abundance, because that’s the best position of leverage. You can take your time making a decision. And like my favorite Rumi quote, “Slow and steady, like the river that never grows stale. No hurry, no rush.”
My confidence in who I am is through the roof, and I have to thank you for being a catalyst for change. I found my inner kid but worked hard to be the capable man I am today.
Well, congratulations, dude, on becoming a 3% man at 25 years old. That’s pretty awesome, dude. So, I appreciate you sharing the success story, because I know that will definitely inspire other people that are watching this that may be full of doubt, or afraid, or worried about the future to download “How To Be A 3% Man” and “Mastering Yourself” for free, and “Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations.”
You can read them for free on my website, just subscribe to the email newsletter. And once you do that, you’ll go right to the member’s area. If you’re on a mobile device, you can read it on your mobile device. If you’re on a laptop or desktop computer, you can read it right on your screen and start learning instantly, all for the price of your name and email to sign up. Nobody else that I’ve seen gives away their books for free. But I do, because I know once you see how good the stuff is and how well it works for you, that you’ll come back and buy an audiobook, or a paperback, or a hardcover or book a coaching session.
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Your purpose and mission in life tends to choose you. When you obsess over things you love and enjoy, that you are curious about and that your intuition compels you to explore, with enough time and repetition, action taking and learning from your mistakes to refine your approach, your purpose becomes obvious. The key is taking action and seeing where this leads you to, much like peeling the layers of an onion reveals even more layers just below the surface.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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