I Lied To Her. Got Caught & Dumped. Will She Come Back?

How to know when you lied & got dumped if she will come back.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who admits he was a dirt bag to his now ex-girlfriend. He’s 23, read 3% Man, 7 times in the last year. He lied to her about a female friend at work, got caught and she dumped him. He begged, cried and pleaded for another chance. She came over to bring his stuff, they hooked up all day as he continued acting needy and begging for another chance. She left saying they’d never see each other again. He wants to know if she will ever come back. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “I Lied To Her. Got Caught & Dumped. Will She Come Back?”

Well, love cannot exist where there is no trust. So this particular emailer, he’s 23. He’s read 3% Man he says about seven times in the last year. And so his girlfriend just dumped him the other day because I guess he lied to her, apparently about a female “friend” from work. So he doesn’t really elaborate. I don’t know what was going on there, if he’s texting with her or flirting with her or whatever. But his girlfriend suspected something was off.

Somehow she figured out what was going on. He admitted it, after lying, she broke up with him and then she got in touch to come bring his stuff by. When she brought his stuff by, they hooked up all day long. But he says he continued to beg and plead and cry and act needy, which he could tell just by looking at her, was turning her off. And when she left, she basically said, they’re never going to see each other again and then rode off into the sunset.

So it’s been like three days now and he’s wondering, “Is she going to come back? Will she come back?” He admits he was a dirt bag, so he doesn’t really elaborate. So I don’t know if he was cheating on her or he was just flirting with this girl or what, but he got caught and she’s out the door. So when we were doing the live stream back on Friday, there was somebody that had a similar question about this. And, you know, basically they had screwed up, lied, got dumped. What are the chances that she’s potentially going to come back?

So you’ve got to be truthful. You’ve got to be honest. You got gotta have high character, because if you don’t, and especially if, I mean if I take the perspective of like, what if this was like my daughter? Say I had a daughter that was dating this guy, then she finds out that her boyfriend is flirting, or maybe hanging out with some chick from the office. And there was something going on. He’s lying to her. And I had raised my daughter right, to be a high character person. She’s dating this guy. The guy’s lying to her, talking to another girl.

So if I was a dad to her, I’d be looking at this going, “Yeah, I’m not really a fan of you dating a guy like this.” Especially a dude who’s 23, fucking around like that. It’s like, if it’s my daughter, I wouldn’t want her to have anything to do with this guy. Because if I’ve raised her right and taught her good values to be honest and loyal and faithful, and she’s dating a guy and he basically cheats on her. I don’t know how far it went. He doesn’t elaborate, but he just says his words.

He was a dirt bag. So I personally wouldn’t want my daughter dating somebody that’s behaving that way. Because if somebody this young and they’re doing that well, that just shows that they’re kind of a person of questionable or low character. Because if this guy valued loyalty and monogamy and exclusivity, he’s not going to maintain some friendship with a cute girl from work. So it sounds there’s probably more going on than he let on, but we’re going to go through the email anyways.

Viewer Email:

Hey Corey,

I’ve been following you and your work for over about a year now I’m 23 I’ve read 3% Man 7 to 8 times in that time span, and I got dumped about a week and half ago by my ex-girlfriend. I was a dirt bag, and I lied to her about having a female friend at work as in I didn’t tell her about the friend, and she suspected I had a female friend I wasn’t being truthful to her about.

Yeah. If you’re walking around the house and you’re texting all the time with this girl, it’s like, that’s inappropriate. So again, if this was my daughter, I’d be like, “fuck this guy.” I’d kick him in the fucking dick if he came over again after that. I wouldn’t want him around my daughter. Because if he’s doing it once, especially if he’s cheating on her, it’s like, “I don’t think so. You’re out buddy.” I’m never going to like this guy. Not going to forgive him. I’m going to do everything I can to keep him away from my daughter and my family.

Just because if he’s this young and he’s behaving this way, maintaining a relationship with some other girl other than his girlfriend, well, it’s like, why would I want to deal with that? You say we forgive this guy in a perfect world. You think he’s going to stop doing this? Probably not. Because this reflects on him and his character and his family and how they raised him. So if you think about it, this happens. Maybe your daughter doesn’t tell you about it because it’s not a big deal.

But if a father is close to his daughter, she’s gonna tell him everything. And I look at it and it’d be pretty obvious what I’m going to think about that. Because I just know it’s not really going to change. It might be good for a while, but at some point in the future, if he gets away with it and she sticks around and forgives him, at some point in the future, he’ll probably just do it again. It’s like, what happens if they had kids together now? I got a grandchild with a guy who admittedly is a fucking dirtbag. It’s like, I don’t want that dude in my family. I’d want him to stay the fuck away. So with that in mind, let’s go back to his email.

So she broke up with me. Despite reading 3% Man and knowing better than to beg and cry. This being my first long-term relationship and first heartbreak. I begged her and apologized for two days because I felt guilty for lying to her.

Again. If you’re a good, honest, loyal person, you’re just not going to. I never did anything like this ever, not to a single girlfriend. Lying to somebody’s face like that when you’re in a relationship, that’s just low character.

After two days I let her go. She texted me solidifying the breakup two days after that and I told her I was sorry if she changes her mind shoot me a text or a call. When she came to drop off my things at my place, she ended up coming inside and we hooked up. We later got dinner together and had a lot of sex. She was very affectionate but made it clear that it was the last day she would ever be seeing me again.

So that’s what she says. And if you act unattractive, that will be if you chase and you pursue. And plus, if she’s raised by a father that taught her good values, then she ain’t coming back. This is like break up sex. This is like, have a nice life sex. Just something to remember this guy by. And if it was my daughter, I’d be totally in favor of her never speaking to this guy again. And obviously, if he showed up at my house. That would be bad for him. I wouldn’t tolerate it. I wouldn’t allow it. I’d be like, “get the fuck away from my daughter and my family. Or you not going to like the consequences.”

I kept trying to press for us getting back together throughout the day and acting needy which I could tell turned her off because even though I screwed up she dumped me so regardless I realized she’s got to earn a place back in my life.

Well, you have to let her come back to you. Because love is allowing, after all. Because what’s really going to determine is her emotions. If you keep chasing and you keep pursuing, it’s just going to turn her off and further cement in her mind that she made the right decision. Because now you’re acting weak and pathetic and needy and super unattractive.

But if you just hang back, you say, “Wow.” You tried to apologize. You begged, you pleaded, you cried. That’s not going to work. The only thing that’s going to work is you being masculine. Obviously, you admitted your mistake. But if it was my daughter, you’d be dunces. That would make it my life’s mission to make sure you’re dunces.

Right before she had left, she confirmed this.

And besides knowing what I know, it’s like there’s no going to be coming back from that.

Right before she had left, she confirmed this by saying I’m just like her exes she can have whenever she wants. So I let her go she texted me thank you for everything I hearted her message and moved about my day. It’s been three days since I’m not pursuing her, I want her back and realized how I screwed up. Do you think she’ll come back?

What are your thoughts on the overall situation?

Flip a coin. But if you continue to pursue and chase after her, she’ll be gone forever. Again, if it was my daughter, I’d be telling her things and saying things, because I have skills and tools that most dudes do not have. And he would be coming back from it. But in this case, let’s assume she’s not a perfect angel either. But you got to let her be. You got to let her experience life without you. Because she said, “It’s over. You’re never going to see me again.” Well, the strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it.

So you get to see if she means it, if her interest is super high and it really was innocent what you did and you weren’t cheating on her or trying to line up a side chick. But again, it’s like, why are you doing. That’s just not the behavior of somebody that’s loyal. What it looks like is he was in a relationship with this girl, and there’s a cute girl at work that’s interested in him. He’s young, probably doesn’t have a lot of experience dating. He’s not really 100% committed to committing to her.

And so that’s why, you know, he’s looking the grass is greener on the other side because he just doesn’t have enough life experience. He hasn’t dated enough. And so this girl came along. He befriended her. He didn’t want to just be friends with her. He wants to fuck her. That’s why he’s talking to her. That’s the bottom line. He’s not exchanging cooking recipes or yoga routines with her. He wants to beat up her pelvis. And he was thinking that he was going to get away with it. And then he got caught because his behavior was odd and this girl could pick up on it.

She knew he didn’t have 100% of his presence. And her Spidey senses were tingling, and it came to the proper conclusion. So if she’s got a healthy self-esteem and a strong family and a good father that’s not going to put up with this kind of fuckery, you’re done. But if it’s just a regular guy and not a perfect situation. Again, flip a coin, it could go either way. But I promise you, if you keep chasing after and running after, you’re just going to turn her off. You’re going to make yourself look weak, pathetic, and needy, and you’ll literally chase her out of your life and she’ll never come back.

So the only thing you can do now is nothing. If she reaches out, make a date. Invite her over, make dinner. Hang out and have fun, hook up. Pretty simple, but you can’t chase, you can’t pursue. And ideally, if it was just totally innocent again, this doesn’t look innocent at all. A guy like this is not going to maintain a female friend from the office. It’s probably a hot girl. He was imagining banging her. Probably all the dudes that he works with talk about her and want to get in her pants. And he’s thinking, “Oh, I know Corey’s book. I can get away with it.”

He said, he’s a dirtbag. He knew what he did. So it sounds like he cheated or was lining her up and got caught or something. So again, it really depends on how good the dad did of raising her. How tight they are. She comes to him and tells him everything. And he’s smart and he’s wise, like yours truly. He’ll burn your shit down. He just will not allow you back into his daughter’s life or his family’s life. And she’ll love and respect her father as much as it crushes her, she’ll see it for what it is. Because you need somebody that’s loyal and faithful.

But if the family situation is not so tight, if a relationship is not so tight with her dad, then there’s a good chance she’s going to come back. I would say more than likely I’d say there’s at least a 51% chance she’s going to come back in that case. So that’s all you can do, man. You’ve got to do better. You’ve got to be a high character person. Don’t be a fucking shitbird. Don’t be a dirtbag. Don’t be acting like a fucking douchebag like Andrew Tate or one of those fucking retards. You’ve got to be a man of high character and high value. Especially if you’re following me.

If you’re not, you probably should go follow somebody else. Because I want people that are of high character learning my work and living it. Not using it to manipulate people or do shitty things. So that’s something to think about. It’s losing a good woman like this is what can potentially cause a guy like this to change. But if she comes back to him, he got away with it, right? He’ll probably do it again. But if he gets his heart broken and he loses a girl like this, and it takes a long time for him to find somebody else like this, he might not, it might change him. It might not. It just depends on his situation.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

If you haven’t already signed up for our Paying Members Only Premium Content, you can either join on YouTube, there’s a link in the video description of this video, or you can join on Spotify. There’s a link there as well. You can also join on Twitter as well @CoachCoreyWayne. Or ideally preferably, you can do a seven day free trial on our Website, UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just click the “plans” tab when you get there. And you can do a monthly or an annual plan.

And on the Website, if you do choose an annual plan, you get a 25% discount for paying the whole year’s premium up front. You can’t get that anywhere else. And the content that’s on the Website and Spotify is pretty much me full breach. The stuff that’s on YouTube is going to be a little bit more watered down. I just can’t really say the things I really want to say on YouTube, just because of the communist Karens that work there and the content moderation department.

So again, UnderstandingRelationships.com click the “plans” tab and go check out all the hundreds and hundreds of Videos you get for a Premium Membership. Until next time. Oh, one thing I also don’t want to forget to let you guys know about. Every Friday at 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. Eastern Standard Time Zone, which is the same time zone as Miami and New York. We do a live stream with myself, Chunky and The Girls. We just answer all of your questions for a couple of hours.

So Super Chats are appreciated, obviously can help because there’s a lot of questions that get asked. And so we do it for about two hours. We’re also going to do one this Thursday, 04/10/25, as well. I think we’re going to do it at 1:00 or 2:00 PM EST. If you go to my YouTube Channel @CoachCoreyWayne and hit the “live” tab, then you’ll be able to see our previous live streams and any upcoming ones, and you can click on “notify”. So it’ll send you a notification on the app or an email. Or it’ll pop up in your phone and let you know that we’re about to go live or and we have gone live. So until next time, I will talk to you soon.