I Quit My Job To Pursue My Passions, But My Girlfriend Is No Longer Supportive

What you should do if you are unemployed, your girl is bitchy & unsupportive.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who got his girlfriend and baby momma of 7 years due to my work. In 2021 he quit his job to pursue investing in the stock market. His girlfriend has a successful business now, but he is struggling in his. She is bitchy and wants him to do more to pull his own weight and earn money. He doesn’t want to give up his studies to go back to work and asks what he can do. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter in the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “I Quit My Job To Pursue My Passions, But My Girlfriend Is No Longer Supportive.”

Well, this particular email is from a guy who’s been following me for quite some time. He said he got his girlfriend and baby mama of seven years due to my work. And so back in 2021, he quit his job to pursue his passion for investing in the stock market. And so I guess somewhere along the way, in 2022, I think it was his girlfriend got an opportunity to start a business and so he moved away. I guess he was doing like trades work and stuff like that.

To, you know, to keep the cash flow coming in. And since she was doing well enough, she’s been like the primary breadwinner. But now we’re into 2025. Four years later, and he’s still going to school. He’s basically a stay at home dad. Takes care of the kids and everything else. And she’s getting a little bitchy, and she’s kind of. Her patience is running out. And he doesn’t really want to go back to work because he’s like, well, then I have to give up my school to do that.

And then I’m giving up my passions and it’s the end of the world, basically. So let’s go through his email. I’m kind of surprised that he got this far down the road. If you guys can probably hear the puppies are all going bananas. That, you know, they was able to go four whole years without really having an income and relying on his girlfriend to provide for the whole family. She just doesn’t feel like he’s doing enough to contribute.

Viewer Email:

Hi from Australia Corey!

Long time listener, first time emailer. I found your work long back when I wanted to attract a woman I worked with in 2014.

So he’s been following me for 11 years.

I then left my girlfriend in 2015 and found a woman just like her in 2018 thanks to your work. I read and listened to 3% man repeatedly back then. Fellas, don’t ever put it down. In 2021 I left my employment to study stock market investing part time and start a business as a tradesman with the rest of my time. My passion is investing and I had my business as a tradesman as back up when we needed the money.

Well, that’s a smart way to grow a business. And I discuss these things at length in Mastering Yourself because I’ve done both. I’ve built a business on the side, and I’ve also burned all the boats and had no income and relied on my savings, my capital to fund my new business. For those of you that read Mastering Yourself, you know how that turned out.

Because when you got money in the bank, you got capital. You got a certain amount of runway, a certain amount of months or years, unless, of course, you’re independently wealthy, made it the old fashioned way you inherited it. But the rest of us schmucks, we had to work for it. No silver spoon was in my mouth when I was born.

My girl was my biggest cheerleader when I quit my employment in 2021. I worked and studied 50/50 with my time from 2021 to 2024. Things were going smoothly. In 2024 we decided to move 2 hours away, which I agreed to as it was an opening for me to study more, and my partner had a great business opportunity in our new location and would pay our way while I got my stock market investing project off the ground.

Well, if you’re investing, unless you’re a day trader, I mean, typically if you’re investing in the market, I mean it’s like what Buffett says, “if you wouldn’t own a stock for ten years, you should own it for ten minutes.” And so I don’t know if that means he’s just investing and waiting for things to take off, or he’s a trader. And so he’s in and out of stocks based on the volatility.

This meant leaving my business behind and having more of a role with the kids, home and studying. No more income from me. 

So I assume his girlfriend was making really good money in her business.

I study my ass off.

Or he says arse. The way they pronounce it. They’re from the land down under.

Into the night and with all the free time I have during the day while the kids are in school/care. My investing is not bearing fruit yet and my Mrs. is now becoming bitchy, doesn’t talk about me positively like she used to, blaming me for not earning and pushing me to more home duties while she grows her business.

Well, that would be reasonable for you to if you’re strictly going to be at home and she’s going to provide the income for both of you and obviously your kids. That’s really not, if you’re especially if you’re at home all day working from home and studying, that would be understandable.

I feel I am losing my masculine image with her. And she’s growing hers.

Yeah, this is definitely going to force her to be into her masculine and that’s why she’s becoming bitchy. Women tend to become bitchy because they don’t feel safe. They feel fearful. In other words, they don’t feel like they can rely on you. And so she’s giving you a year. But, I mean, you’ve been at this for four years now without much to show for it. So this is totally understandable. And quite frankly, it’s to be expected. Women, quite frankly, aren’t really built to handle this role reversal. And what I’ve seen over the 20 years I’ve been doing this is guys get about 6 to 12 months to flail around, be depressed, be sad they lost their job or whatever until the woman starts or the women start looking for the exits.

It seems like it was all a bad idea. I’m also not appreciating the disrespect she now pushes my way due to the no earning, even though she agreed to our new way of doing things.

Well, there’s always a time limit. Like if you were investing in a business, say, say it was you and another partner and you both agreed to put a certain amount of money in, maybe you were going to do more of the work. The other one was going to do more of the capital contribution. And so when you’re coming up with a partnership agreement, you’re one of the best things to do is to determine what’s your ceiling? How much money are you willing to invest and lose before you’re like, all right, I’m tapping out. And again, you put that into a partnership agreement.

So say your business partnership requires $200,000 of capital, and that gives you 24 months of runway. And maybe you put in $50,000 and your partner puts in 150,000. Well, in the partnership agreement, you spell out that that’s what you each owe to the partnership. Maybe you put it all in at once, or maybe you contribute for the duration, but if you don’t get those things agreed to ahead of time and upfront. Then typically whoever is working the hardest is going to get upset at some point in time. And then you’re going to have bad friction.

I’m spending too much time with the kids, because she has to work. I’m not cut out for it.

Well, maybe you should go back to work then.

We have just ticked over 7 years together and 2 kids who are 2 and 5 years old. This is where I need your help. Have I fucked up by not preempting how this would go relationship wise?

Well, you should have had a better plan. And when you had a good income from being a tradesperson and then all of a sudden you just quit to rely on your girlfriend. Like I said, you’ve probably heard me say many times if you’ve been following me. Or maybe he got away from following me and just has recently come back because he’d been in a good relationship. And so what’s happened here is you’ve kind of made your girlfriend the man and the relationship, and you’re acting like the woman.

And it sounds like you’re kind of complaining. I don’t have enough time to take care of the house, I need help. You got to help me. Which is typically what the women complain about. Even though when they’re a stay at home mom, they complain that you’re not doing enough to help around the house, even though you might be working a full time job.

I’m unsure if I should get a full-time job and forget the study for now, but that would likely make me depressed for not chasing my passions.

Well, you just have to change your approach because again, I don’t know what type of investing you’re doing. Maybe you’re doing covered calls or something like that. You’re doing options trading. But it sounds like you’re investing and sitting on it. And so I mean, you’re not going to make money for a long time unless, you know, I don’t know if you’re investing other people’s money or it’s just your own personal money. It didn’t really elaborate, but you got to have some kind of income. And even you said you’re not really cut out for childcare and basically being Mr. Mom.

So maybe the solution is to go back to work.

Maybe go back to work part time, or you do the tradesman thing again in your area and you build the business on the side, because that’s the smart thing to do. Is to have two incomes, because what happens if your girlfriend’s business fails? Then now you have zero income.

But if she has a good, successful business and you’re making money as a tradesman while you’re also building your investment portfolio on the side, that would make more financial sense. You create a more stable environment. You would be calmer, you’d be more relaxed. Because you’re going to do your best work when you’re relaxed. And you’re clearly stressed out and your girl’s stressed out. And that’s not a good place to be, especially with two little kids at home.

Or keep at it for a bit longer despite how I feel and how I am being treated by her? 

Well, obviously what you’re doing is not working, so you need to make some changes.

Also, are there any tips how to date and court my woman while we have no spare money for babysitters etc.?

Well, again, I think the smart thing to do is to get a job and to get a second income. So you’re going to have to figure that out.

I’m struggling in this area. How can I resurrect my masculine image while I’m not earning?

Well you need to earn, pretty simple. If, you know, because this is typically when guys are single and they’re struggling, they’re going to have more short term relationships. But when they’re stable, they’re making good, stable money. They have a good career, a good job, good business. They’re going to feel more comfortable being in a long term relationship, having kids, those kinds of things. So you started building your family when both of you were pretty stable. Both of you, you had a dual income household, and then you made a decision a year ago to move, to give up your business and to do this full time. And as you said, you’re not really cut out for it anyways.

So you and your girlfriend need to sit down and have a heart to heart, because if you keep doing what you’re doing, she’s just going to get bitchier and get more upset. And so what it tells me is you stop dating and courting her because you’re concerned about money and you don’t have cash for babysitters, so you can’t end your courtship because of cash, because what’s going to happen eventually is she’s going to look for the exits, and depending on her character, she’ll either dump you and find somebody else, or she’ll find somebody else while you’re together, start dating them because they’re stable, and then they’ll leave you and you’ll have to get it.

You’ll have to get a job anyways. So if I were you and you want to keep your relationship together, I would go and get a job and figure it out and contribute because the courtship never ends. That’s a core principle from the book. So it sounds like he said he read the book a lot many years ago, and he probably got away from it and didn’t realize he was slowly getting away from it until now. His girlfriend’s bitchy all the time.

She doesn’t feel safe because you’re not pulling your weight as the man. It doesn’t mean you have if you get a job, you got to quit your studies. It just means you’re not going to have to study as much. And I don’t know what you’re studying, if you’re going to school, or you’re just studying the market, or you’re doing research.

But you’re going to have to work, you’re going to have to earn an income. Because, how are you going to be a successful investor if you’re broke? That doesn’t really make any sense. So I don’t know what kind of capital you’re investing, or maybe you’re just studying, or maybe it’s, you know, your girlfriend just look at it and recognize and you’re not really making any progress. You’re not making any money yet you’re broke. And since you don’t have any additional money to take her out and get babysitters, then you’re no longer dating and courting her. And women want to be in a love story. And I mean, again, it’s a core principle from the book. You can’t violate it.

I feel I have lost her respect, and I am working harder and longer than I ever have, but with kids, home and study and not earning much yet.

Any advice for a guy in my position is greatly appreciated.

Bob

Well, you’re going to have to do some reorganization in your life. You’re going to have to get a job, because the way you’re going about it clearly is not working. All it’s doing is adding stress to the household, and that’s not a good environment. Kids need to be raised in a calm environment, not an environment where mom and dad are at each other’s throats and mom doesn’t respect dad because he’s not making any money. And on top of that, since they don’t have any money, he doesn’t date quarter anymore because if you don’t date in court, your girlfriend or your wife, eventually some other guy is going to come along and do it for you.

All you got to do is look at Tom Brady. He had everything. The looks, the position, the money, he had everything. Even though she was wealthier than he was, I think she still is worth more than he is. But he didn’t date and court her. He wasn’t present, wasn’t there. And eventually she tapped out. And now she’s with the jiu jitsu guy and they just had a kid together. So you’re in danger of wrecking your relationship if you keep on the path that you’re on? I would never advise this.

I also highly recommend that you read Mastering Yourself. That’s free to read the Members Area of the Website to help you understand, because it’s like you got to have cash flow, dude, that’s kind of the bottom line. And you’ll respect yourself more if you work. She’ll respect you and you gotta date and court her, Dude. You can’t just, you know, sit at home and expect your girlfriend to be the man. There’s a time limit on that and your time is running out.

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