I Rejected Her. Now I’m Famous In Facebook Groups?

The importance of vetting women properly & rejecting the crazy ones early.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a 37 year old viewer who was dating a girl where the sex was hot. Over time he saw too many red flags and when she asked him to be her boyfriend, he told her no. She didn’t take it well. Her crazy behavior escalated and eventually he blocked her everywhere. A new girl he was dating found him in a Facebook group being bashed and slandered by her and her friends. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter and the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “I Rejected Her. Now I’m Famous In Facebook Groups?”.

So this email is a cautionary tale. You’ve got to be careful who you date and especially if you recognize your date in a crazy girl. Lots of red flags, and you continue hanging out, having fun and hooking up and you don’t dip, and then you finally decide to dip once she really starts acting crazy.

The old saying, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. And so these days we’ve got, are we dating the same guy on Facebook. And we also have the T app, which is basically a platform where women can go and slander dudes whether they did anything wrong or not.

If you date a woman and she’s bitter, she might go and try to torch your reputation. And I don’t know what the laws are in specific states and countries, but you can’t just go publish stuff that is not true because that qualifies as slander. So this guy here, he’s a photographer and was dating this girl.

She was really hot. Sex was great, but he started noticing a lot of red flags. And after a few months of dating, she wanted to be boyfriend girlfriend. He says, I don’t see it going there, which really pissed her off. So they kept dating and then he rejected her completely.

And then she, you know, waterworks and manipulation and love bombing. And he admits, well, I was kind of a softie. So he kept hanging out and having fun and hooking up, but her behavior just kept getting crazier and crazier. And eventually he backed away, blocked her everywhere.

And he was dating a new girl and apparently the new girl happened to go and look him up online, because that’s pretty much what people do these days. And she found him on the Facebook post saying all these things that just simply weren’t true. She felt bad for him, but she also backed away and is not as enthusiastic.

So these things are not good for your reputation. So you’ve got to be very careful with who you date and who you give the meat missile to. Because if you lead a girl on that’s kind of nutty for many months and she really gets hooked and then you dip on her, you might end up like this guy.

Viewer Email:

Hey Corey,

Big fan. I’ve read 3% Man 15 times over the years. Wanted to run a situation by you and get your take, because it also feels like something guys should be aware of. I’m a successful 37 year old guy in Hawaii. I was dating a girl—we’ll call her Becky. Super attractive, great chemistry at first. But over time I started seeing red flags, so even though the sex was hot.

When she asked me to be her boyfriend, I was honest and told her I didn’t see it going there. She didn’t take it well at all. It turned into this really intense push-pull. Waterworks, crying, begging to change my mind, and if I did see her, she’d try to pull me back in with crazy sex and affection—just doing whatever she could to reconnect. I’ll be honest, sometimes it worked because I’m a bit of a softie.

Well, no one will ever do or say anything to you that you don’t invite them to do. And so your continued hanging out with the crazy girl, gave her hope and quite frankly, hooked her even more that it was going to lead to something and she was going to be able to change your mind. But crazy girls are crazy for a reason.

It’s that that very famous, uh, meme. Oh, shit. Was it 15, ten, 15 years; the hot and crazy matrix. It’s so true. If you mess with those crazy girls. I’ve got a story about a friend of mine that dated a crazy girl, and it really ended badly for him. And she did some things that she couldn’t take back afterwards. But I’ll get into that in a second.

But it kept escalating. It went from crying and love bombing to manipulative to eventually threatening behavior. “You tricked me into loving you!” At a certain point, I had to block her because it was getting out of hand.

Yeah, that sounds like fun.

Then I started hearing that her and/or her friends were posting about me in those “Are We Dating the Same Guy” Facebook groups and possibly the T app—saying I’m a photographer, which I am, who goes to other islands, does shoots with girls, and tries to have them “pay” in sex. Completely false. I only found out because a girl I recently started dating saw the post and told me. She actually felt bad for me, but it also made her step back and say it scared her, especially thinking about her 18 year old son dating and how quickly things like this can happen.

Well again, when you see all those red flags you’re supposed to dip. I wouldn’t continue seeing the crazy girl for months on end because you get her hooked and then you finally have to block her everywhere, and she don’t react too well to it, it’s not going to end well. So I’ll tell you a story about a buddy of mine. And so back when he was in high school, he had a high school girlfriend. They loved each other.

Of course, she sent him nudes, like pretty much all girls do to guys that they like. And they were like 15, 16 at the time, I think. And so he had them in his phone because it was his girlfriend and she sent them to him. So they were underage at the time. However, when he was in his early 20s, like 22, 23, I think it was, he dated a girl who was nutty as hell. Hot and crazy matrix, right?

The whole nine yards. And she knew about the pictures, I don’t know. He was just like a very honest, very open guy. And so she knew about the pictures and eventually they broke up. He didn’t want to get back together with her. And this really pissed her off. So she called the police and said that he had naked pictures of an underage girl on his phone, even though it was his girlfriend.

And after the fact, she thought about it and was like, “Oops, I shouldn’t have done that.” So she calls him and tells him what she did, apologizes profusely. And he says, “Well, you’ve got to tell them this was my girlfriend.” And so she called the police back and was like, “Oh, I take it all back.” And he’s like, “Well, you made the report, so now we gotta investigate.”

So they basically show up, take his phone. Of course, the pictures are on there because he’s just being compliant. He’s doing what the popo told him to do. And you get some district attorney who, quite frankly, just cares about scalps. He doesn’t give a shit about right or wrong. And quite frankly, a lot of those dudes are really bad people. So, you know, you’ve got innocent people in prison that happens.

And you come across one of these ratchet DAs who only cares about himself and his career and advancing the latter, he don’t care who he steps on. He’s just kind of ruthless. And so technically he violated the law because he’s got naked pictures of an underage girl, even though it was his girlfriend when they were in high school and they were both underage, it didn’t matter. The Lady justice is supposed to be blind.

And so it technically met the definition. And so the DA is like, “Well, you could do a plea bargain. You’ll have to register as a sex offender. Or if you want to fight it, we’ll prosecute you and put you in jail for 10 or 15 years.” And anybody that does any kind of sex offense, they don’t do too well in prison. They usually get the shit beat out of them constantly.

And so he’s young, Doesn’t have any money, can’t really fight it. So he’s like, “Okay. He signed.” And so wherever he lives, whenever he moves, he’s got to register his name and his address and everything. And obviously he didn’t stay with the crazy girl, but what was done was done. And so that has cost him a lot of money and a lot of opportunity over the last 20 plus years that’s something that’s going to carry with him through the rest of his life.

There’s nothing he can do about it because he dated the crazy girl. And again, he was just too honest and revealed too much about himself. And she knew about the pictures on his phone because I guess he had a Rolodex of all of his girlfriends that had sent him nudes. I mean, most of us tend to keep those things. When your girlfriend sends you nude, you know, you have different computers over the years.

It’s like they end up in storage. It’s like they’re still there. I’ve got nudes from girlfriends from 20 years ago, so I’m not going to delete those. Those are wonderful times and wonderful memories even they’re on a computer and in storage. I’m not going to go and delete those things. Obviously, back when I was in high school, you know, you had to take pictures and then get them developed.

But obviously now, you know, it’s just easy with a cell phone, take a picture and boom, you can send it to anybody. And so if you have anything like that on your phone, it’s probably better to delete those types of things, especially if you were a teenager and your girlfriend when you were both were underage, sent them to you.

Because if you come across a crazy girl again, you come across a DA who just cares about their career and advancing and they don’t give a shit. You’re just a scalp to them. They really don’t give a shit. And pretty much ruined this guy’s life because there’s so many things he’s missed out on that he just couldn’t do.

Because obviously he has to tell people about that and they’re like, “Oh, I can’t get involved with that. The legal jeopardy and blah, blah, blah.” So it really sucks. He’s a good dude, but he dated a crazy girl once and she kind of ruined his life, basically. So that’s an extreme case. And so you’ve got to understand women like that are out there.

That’s why everything’s great and everybody’s lovey dovey when you get married but if you decide to get unmarried, and you decide to get divorced and she’s emotional about it, logic and reason go out the window. There’s nothing logical or reasonable about a woman’s behavior, especially when she’s overly emotional. You date a crazy girl that came from a broken home. Dad wasn’t there to teach her how to chill out, and so she’s just a nutty lunatic.

I mean, you can go on Twitter and there’s, you know, you’ve got fast food restaurants for people who got Fight Club chapters going on and Popeyes and Taco Bell and 7-Eleven and Wawa’s just going crazy, just beating the shit out of each other and destroying the store and then filming it, of course. And you know, those people are out there.

So if you date one of those crazy girls that do crazy things, bad things can happen. So again, when the red flags present themselves, you’ve got to have the emotional strength. And as the late, great Richard Marcinko, the founder of Seal Team Six, would say, testicular fortitude. You’ve got to have testicular fortitude to disengage. So back to our regularly scheduled email here.

So now I’m in this spot where part of me wants to track it down and confront who ever posted it, and another part of me feels like that might just make it worse.

Well if I were you, depending on what country and state you’re in, I would go talk to an attorney about it. Because if she’s posting things and making things up and her friends are doing that, that’s slander and that’s against the law. And we have defamation laws in the states. I mean, every state is different. That’s why you should find obviously an attorney in your area and talk to them and tell them what has happened.

Maybe just sending a threatening letter to her to sue her for defamation of character. I mean, because at the end of the day, if you sue for defamation of character, she’s still got to go hire an attorney and got to fight it. And it’d be much easier to take the post down than to go out and spend thousands and thousands of dollars with an attorney.

And at the end of the day, the court can force her to remove things that are slanderous anyways if you win your case. So if it was me, especially if you’re one of those guys where something like this can really screw up your opportunities in business in life. It might be worth it to go seek legal counsel in your state, your city, your country that’s licensed to practice law that can advise you on these matters.

Because with the advent of the internet, it’s like pictures and stuff like this they are there forever. You can’t just delete it. Back in my day, it’s like we went out and we would do crazy things and hope, you know, Monday morning nobody would talk about it and it didn’t get back to the teachers, your parents or whatever. And there usually wasn’t any photographic evidence besides the fact.

But nowadays it’s like cameras, camera phones are everywhere. So when something like this happens again, you’ve got to think very carefully. Especially you guys that love to do online dating. You know, it’s like, I feel bad for you. I’m glad I’m not out there doing those things. But man, there’s a high incidence of crazy girls on the online dating sites. So you’ve got to be really careful because these nuts are out there and you don’t want to have what happened to this guy.

It’s wild how fast things escalated—from rejection, to obsession, to trying to damage my reputation. Curious how you’d handle this.

Well like I said, if it was me and you’d already blocked her everywhere. Because if you call her, you text her, you re-engage, then she’s going to try to reel you back in. You know, the attorney, I would imagine. I don’t know for sure, but he’d probably say, “Well, maybe reach out to her and ask her nicely to take it down.”

And if she refuses, then say, “Great. I’ve already talked to my attorney about it, and this is defamation of character, and I’m going to sue you, and I’m going to sue all of your friends that were making up Facebook posts about me and putting it out there, and you all have to get an attorney and defend yourselves. And if I win my case, you’re going to owe me a lot of money and your reputation will be damaged.”

You can’t go and do things like that because there have been very famous cases over the last 20 years. It was like the Duke lacrosse team. The woman who was a hooker, a sex worker, basically said that, you know, it was like 5 or 6 lacrosse dudes. This is like, I don’t know, 25, 30 years ago forced themselves onto her. And of course, you know, dirtbag Al Sharpton got involved and uh, he didn’t care. He’s a scumbag.

And turned out the bitch made the whole thing up, wrecked their reputation. They got kicked out of school. And then there was another case, I don’t know, ten, 15 years ago, it was on Ivy League campus. A guy was dating a girl, and she got pissed off at him because he didn’t want to date her anymore. It was just kind of like he dated for a little bit.

They were kind of hooking up and she didn’t like being rejected. And so she started carrying like a twin mattress all over campus, basically saying, she was sexually assaulted by this guy and the school wouldn’t do anything about it. And then, of course, the media got wind of it. And this was like when the MeToo thing was blowing up. And so, of course, believe all women, they believed her and it ended up going to court.

And he had all the texts where she was the one pursuing him and obsessing over him, trying to get him to hang out. And he’s just like, “I’m not interested, leave me alone.” And so of course, he won his case. But by that point, for a couple of years, his reputation had been dragged through the mud. And so I would imagine it would be a tremendous expense. And so most of the famous cases, especially like anything that Al Sharpton was involved in, they all were bullshit.

Tawana Brawley, all of them were bullshit. He didn’t care. He was a fucking dirtbag. Al Sharpton’s a scumbag. And yet he’s on MSNBC and got his own show, which is pretty insane. So I think that was my phone ringing. So anyways, so I’m on like the third floor and the dogs are on the second and the first floor going crazy. So somebody must have shown up or it was my phone ringing. So sorry about the dog outburst. There’s nothing I can do about that.

Curious how you’d handle this.

Yeah, like I said, I would be talking to an attorney, legal counsel in my area and find out what they would do about it.

And more broadly, how do guys protect themselves from this kind of thing in today’s dating environment? Can something like this really hurt my career?

Appreciate you, man.

Bob

Again, I would want to get it removed. Like I said, at this point, you need an attorney that can advise you. The easy way is to ask her nicely to remove it, and then if she doesn’t remove it again, I would talk to the attorney first. He might tell you, well, go talk to her and see if you can do something about it. But you know, that’s basically all you can do at that point. You need to talk to legal counsel. But you know, again, these, these things are out there.

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