I’m Dating 2 Women Who Know Each Other & It Got Messy. What Now?

What you can do if you’re dating 2 women who know each other & drama started.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a 33 year old viewer who got out of the military a year ago and enrolled in beauty school. He was dating and sleeping with 2 different women who eventually met and got to like each other. However, several women outside their relationship have been trying to cause drama and he asks how to handle it. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “I’m Dating 2 Women Who Know Each Other & It Got Messy. What Now?”

Well, this is an unusually interesting email. This particular email it’s like you don’t expect the combination of things that are here. You have a guy who got out of the military, sends a picture. He’s pretty jacked, fit and in shape, and you’ll never guess what industry he decided to go into. So he decided to go to beauty school. So I assume that’s hair, nails, and makeup, the whole nine yards.

And so he started dating one particular woman, and apparently she was in contact with a lot of her exes, which he said, “hey, this is a deal breaker.” And she kept doing it. So he broke things off. And then he started dating a girl who was, I think 18, 19, and he’s like 30, 33. And so then the one that he broke up with kind of came back. And so he was dating both of them. So he had a little bit of a rotation going. And then somehow they found out about each other.

And then that went over like a lead balloon at first. And then they actually got to hanging out and started to like each other, became friends. He continued dating both of them. And then apparently, the ladies at the beautician school were scheming and plotting against him to foil his evil plans. And then, like right on graduation day, they all decided to pop their grenades and throw them in to, just, to stir shit up. So things got really interesting.

So happy Monday to you guys. Let’s go through this email.

Viewer Email:

Hi Coach,

March 2024 marked the end of my military contract and the start of a brand-new chapter. I enrolled in beauty school.

How many dudes that are jacked come out of the military and go to beauty school? That’s like, normally you’re going to be a little light in the loafers if you’re going to do that, but not in all cases. Certainly not this one. However, may the odds always be in your favor as you’ll see in a second, the odds were definitely in this guy’s favor here.

I enrolled in beauty school, stepping into an environment where the ratio of women to men was a staggering 10 to 1.

Duh.

At 33 years old, 6’2” and 220 pounds of solid muscle, I stood out.

Yeah, that’s for sure. Like Jack and the Beanstalk.

The attention was instant, constant stares, flirtation, lingering touches. But I knew better than to dive into the chaos. I needed stability. So, I set my sights outside of school. Within two weeks, I found her. Susy, 30 years old, mature, sexy, and, at the time, exactly what I wanted. It felt like the right choice. For a while, things were smooth. But then, I caught her breaking one of my hard-set rules, talking to previous sexual partners. The messages; harmless. Strictly in the friend zone.

You can tell this guy’s out of the military very short, choppy to the point sentences, but I like that.

But that didn’t matter. I had drawn my lines in the sand before we started dating, and she knowingly crossed them. That was all I needed. I ended things. Looking back, maybe I had already been pulling away before that. The relationship had been getting heavy. I had been covering some of her bills, and I wasn’t about to let that become my new normal. So when I met Mal, an 18 year old in my beauty program, it felt like a fresh start.

Well, nothing like fishing off the company pier.

She was stunning, full of life, and brand new to nearly everything. I was her first in so many ways, and it was an experience like no other. She was a blank slate, eager, hungry, soaking up every moment.

It sounds like a fucking romance novel or a plot in a good movie.

We connected instantly, and within weeks, we were inseparable. But then, against all reason, I forgave Susy and took her back. I didn’t stop seeing Mal.

Well, one is no choice. Two is a dilemma. Three is a proper choice. So maybe things would have been better if he had a third one in his little rotation there. Especially when they all found out about each other.

I felt bad because I didn’t think Susy really thought she was doing anything wrong, and ever since taking her back she has been flawless. Maybe even walking a little too much on eggshells.

Well, she’s respecting the boundaries that you set for your relationship. Those are the terms under which you were willing to be with her, to date her, to be exclusive. But now that she’s coming back, she got rejected because she violated the boundaries. So she’s got to be earning another chance with him, not the other way around.

For two weeks, I lived a double life, keeping both relationships afloat until Mal found out. She was upset, rightfully so.

Well, I guess she didn’t know she was part of the practice squad.

And she gave me an ultimatum: tell Susy the truth, or she would. I didn’t hesitate. I sat Susy down and laid it all out. She was pissed, but she didn’t leave. Neither of them did.

Huh. Interesting. See what happens when you’re brutally honest. You let the chips fall where they may. You know, when you’ve got two different girls like that, it flips a switch. And under normal circumstance, I mean a lot of times both. You might lose both girls, but in this case he’s like, this is what’s going on. He was totally honest with them both, told them what had happened, and they probably appreciated his honesty and the fact he was being real with him, and he let them know they were part of his practice squad. Which may be growing in the near future, potentially.

Time passed, and what started as a disaster somehow turned into balance.

This is what happens. Radical honesty. You just tell them where you’re at. Hey, they can stay. They can go. You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free. This is what’s so beautiful. He’s not chasing. He’s not begging. He’s not pleading. “Oh, Stella, please stay with me.” He’s just like, “hey, this is what’s going on.” They’re like, oh.

I got them to spend time together, and against all odds, they became friends.

This is the best way to make a threesome happen. Let the girls build their rapport together because if they like each other. It’ll be smooth sailing in the bedroom. And if they don’t, they ain’t going to work.

The next four months were pure smooth sailing, no drama, no jealousy, just the three of us moving through life with an unspoken understanding.

Well, that’s called being the king of your kingdom, my man.

Then came graduation day. The beginning of the end.

Dun dun dun. Then we have the new protagonist comes into the picture. Well, it’s a group of them, actually. A group of fucking Karens that gotta ruin it for everybody.

I had brought Susy to my ceremony, proud to have her there, but while I was off preparing to walk the stage, a group of girls from my school blindsided her.

Those damn commie Karens.

Turns out, they had been watching me for months. Whispering, gathering proof, waiting for their moment. They had pictures, stories, gossip. And they dumped it all on her.

Dude, you should be like a romance writer or something. It’s like just the way you write your sentences. It just builds tension. Very good. Interesting story.

Susy wasn’t even mad. Just embarrassed. She found me after and told me everything.

Oh, my classmates are so helpful. That’s great.

Including that Mal’s closest friend at school who I didn’t like because she is one of the man hating women leaning a little too left knew for months.

See, it’s always the commie Karens that cause the fucking problems. This is why we can’t have nice things in America is because of the commie cairns. They want to ruin it for everybody.

She had secretly read through Mal’s messages between us.

How did that happen? Somebody is not maintaining proper operational security here.

And waited until she found my girlfriend to divulge my “secret” relationship.

Well, they kind of knew about each other at this point.

The moment I left, I called Mal to meet me in my car in the parking lot. I told her everything. She wasn’t angry at me—just upset about how it all went down.

Well, I thought Mal knew everything. Now I’m a little confused.

I could hear it in her voice. She was hurt, but she wasn’t sure what to do with that hurt. Later that day, she called me. This time, she told me it was over.

“You’ll be back.” That’s the attitude you gotta have. Well, honey, I’m sorry to see you go. But they knew about each other. They were friends. So what was the issue? Was it the embarrassment, or was it the peer pressure of her girlfriends?

The conversation was long, drawn out—full of pauses, half-finished sentences, moments where she seemed like she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. But eventually, she did. I stayed calm, steady. Told her I understood. Told her I wouldn’t reach out. Told her I hoped to hear from her again. That was a week and a half ago. And since then, silence.

You ever see Jeff Dunham, “Achmed the Dead Terrorist”? “Silence!” Well, the strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it. And you told her you would let her reach out and you wouldn’t. She’s 18. If I was to flip a coin, I’d say it’s probably 51% on the side that she’ll be back. 51%. Maybe a little more. I’d be surprised if she doesn’t come back. How’s she going to walk away from this? Plus, she’s got another girlfriend. That’s your girlfriend? There’s three of you. You’re a throuple. Kinda.

I want to say on the surface I am James Bond incarnate.

Yes, sir, Mr. Bond.

I remain constantly calm, cool, and stoic. This has kept both of my women in a hypnotic state.

How could they say no?

Only outside factors have rocked the boat, and I can always steer back to calm waters. I fear she may not reach out due to the devastation of such a colossal wave.

Well, I mean, she found out everything. Unless there’s stuff you left out here. Because as far as you informed us, both girls got together. They liked each other. They knew that they were both dating you. It’s like, what’s the problem? So the commie Karens in beauty school thought they were going to blow your relationship up, but, they were kind of saying, shouldn’t both girls be like, “hey, I already know this is really, like, none of your fucking business.” How about you take a fucking flying fucking role at a donut? How about that? Karen can go on down the road, but I don’t know, maybe he’s leaving a little few details out here. It just really shouldn’t be an issue unless there’s a lot of peer pressure from these other women. But again, it’s only been a week and a half.

Today I had Susy reach out to her with just memes and small talk.

I wouldn’t be trying to get her to do that. It’s nice that it’s for the girls relationship, but you don’t want to come off as, “Hey, well, Bob asked me to reach out to you. And here’s some memes. I hope you come back to our threesome.” Just let her be.

She replied instantly and they have been talking.

Please Corey let me know what you think is the best move on the board.

Bob

Well, the best move is no move at all because you got the girls are talking and you told her you weren’t going to reach out, but you kind of indirectly did when you asked Suzy to reach out. I personally when I’ve done that, I would have done nothing. And then when the other girl reached out, just invite her over, hang out, have fun, hook up. It’s pretty simple because if you look at it, what did you do? You were brutally, radically honest even when you got found out and you’re like, “hey, this is where we’re at.”

And it’s on them to stay or to go. And initially they both stayed. But now when with peer pressure from the other beauticians from beauty school, you haven’t heard from her in a week, and she says it’s over. Like I said, I think there’s a 51% chance at least it’s more likely that she’ll come back. So it’s good that the two girls are talking, but don’t let it look like you’re using a cutout or a go around because you got to be congruent with your words. And I’d just let her be and she’ll probably come back. She’s 18. It’s new. It’s exciting. It’s something different.

She has a girlfriend out of this as well because she’s got you an additional girlfriend and your little threesome, so it will be interesting. You’ll have to send us a follow up email and let us know how it turns out. But when you’re in a situation like this, you’re backed into a corner, you’re just like, “Tell the truth. Hey, this is what’s going on. Take it or leave it.” Love in such a way that the person you love feels free. To come, to go, to stay, to leave. I’d love to have you. I hope to hear from you again. That was sincere and it was honest, and it was authentic and it was real. Even though it’s messy. Lots of drama, especially with the fucking commie Karens. But you know we all kind of have to do with deal with them because they fucking ruin everything.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

If you guys already haven’t signed up for our Paying Premium Members Only Content in the video description of this video, there are links to join on YouTube or you can join on Spotify, or you can join on our Website UnderstandingRelationships.com. And with the Website, you can do a seven day free trial and check out what content you get on the Website. And also with the Website you get the Email Analysis that goes along with these Emails. And if you haven’t already signed up for a free subscription, just go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, put your name and email and create a password and you can read my book 3% Man totally for free.

All of this stuff, and our former military member who has gotten out and decided to go to beautician school, and rec shop on the Chocha of the beauty school. There’s a little bit of shenanigans going on, but hey, you know what? I think he handled it pretty damn well. But it’s an interesting story that just goes to show, especially with the ladies, when you’re brutally, radically honest and you have a, “take it or leave it” kind of attitude and you just let them be, they typically stick around. So UnderstandingRelationships.com click the “plans” tab when you get there. Sign up for a seven day free trial. And oh, by the way, if you do a seven day free trial on the Website and choose an annual plan, you get a 25% discount at the end of it.

So if you sign up on the Website, that’s where you’ll consume the content. There’s going to be Videos on the Website and on Spotify that aren’t on YouTube, just because of the commie Karens that are at YouTube in the content moderation. But if you just only want to watch Videos, I’d say YouTube or Spotify are you going to be your best bet. If you want me at full breach and Videos only, I’d say Spotify again. The links to join there are in the video description of the Video, so either that, or UnderstandingRelationships.com. Click the “plans” tab when you get there. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.