How to develop non-attachment and indifference, your romantic attraction superpower.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss 2 different emails from 2 different viewers. The 1st email is from a viewer who has been dating a girl for about a year. They are both in the process of getting divorces and were separated from their spouses at the time. However, she has continued to go back and forth between him and her ex-husband to be. He wants her to choose him or her husband and stop jerking him around.
The 2nd email is from a viewer who started dating a girl he really likes, but is becoming a little too controlling and demanding. She’s naturally backing away and he is getting frustrated. Both guys are severely limiting their romantic attraction ability due to their attachment to these women and being chosen by them. I discuss how indifference works, looks and should employed. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the bodies of their emails.
Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter. And the topic of today’s newsletter is going to be Indifference How to Develop Your Attraction Superpower.
Both of these guys, a big part of their problem is they have an attachment to an outcome. In other words, they’re expecting things to be a certain way with the women that they’re dating. And then when it doesn’t, the reality doesn’t match their expectations, they’re getting butt-hurt, they’re getting perturbed, and they tend to become a little more controlling and forceful. They try too hard, they pursue too much, and they are obviously expressing and communicating a vibe that they’re very perturbed. And masculinity is calm. That’s why women don’t react too well when a guy is not calm and he gets perturbed instead.
And so, the first guy, he was separated from his wife, and the woman in question here that he started dating, she was also separated from her husband. So, they started dating. And obviously, if you’ve read 3% Man, you know that I talk about in the book, women that are in the middle of a divorce or something like this, they oftentimes will vacillate. They’ll go back and forth, and they’re not the best ones to get involved with. Ideally, what you want to do is date somebody that’s already done with her divorce. All of the custody, all of the nasty proceedings are behind them, and they’re kind of back to living a normal life.
When you get involved with somebody, especially a woman who’s in the middle of a divorce – because most of the time, 75% of time, women are filing for divorce – oftentimes, the guys don’t want to get divorced, and the guy is trying to come back in the picture. And so, what you’ll see with the first guy here, that’s starting to happen. He becomes a little more controlling, a little more of, “Hey, you need to choose me or your husband,” and she’s bouncing back and forth. Instead of just being completely indifferent to it, unattached, and letting her do most of the pursuing, he’s still pursuing more and trying to force himself into her life. Which, in essence, he’s acting like a woman. He’s acting like he’s stuck in his feminine energy. That’s why it is repulsing her.
And the same thing with the second guy. The second guy reconnected with a girl. I guess he met her or knew her from college, or whatever, and she’s not as into him as he would like. And he’s getting upset and angry, a little controlling, because he’s driven by fear. Because, deep down, his problem is he doesn’t feel he’s worthy of having her or being with her. And when you’re driven by fear like that, you try to force things – you call too much, you text too much, you try to force them to make decisions. Feminine energy is chaos, and it’s just like trying to control a cat and force a cat to sit in your lap and pet it when it no longer wants to be petted. And obviously, the kitty cat is not going to react too well to that. It’s going to dip. It may scratch, it may hiss at you, it may even bite you.
And so, these are two really good emails to go through and just talk about the indifference and the way these guys should be acting in a way that would attract these women. Because, quite frankly, the first guy’s email, the guy who’s dating a woman that’s in the middle of a divorce, I mean, these things are going to happen. That’s how life happens. Nothing’s ever totally, completely, 100% clean and easy. There might be some weird thing going on. Or you have such a good connection and it looks like the divorce is almost finalized, or whatever, but if you bring attachment to it, and you’re getting butt-hurt, and you’re perturbed, you’re going to get in the way of the woman being attracted to you, and wanting to be with you, and wanting to speed up her divorce in this process. But let’s go through the email and see what we can see here. The first one is actually a pretty short email.
First Viewer’s Email:
I have been dating this girl for almost a year now. When we started talking we had both just started getting divorced but we were separated so when we started dating there was a couple times she went back to her ex husband.
This is exactly what I talk about in the book. This is why you should not be getting involved with women like this, because she’s vacillating back and forth. And what exacerbates the situation and makes it worse is the fact that this guy is holding on too tight. He’s being too controlling and too forceful and too “you need to choose me or him kind of attitude,” because what you should be doing in this case is you should be recognizing, hey, she’s not and granted he’s in the middle of a divorce too, but it’s much worse, has much more of a negative effect on women, because they vacillate and go back and forth so much. And in this kind of case, if you’re going to be crazy enough to want to date a woman in the middle of a divorce, you’ve got to let her be.
You have to let her do most, if not all, of the calling, texting and pursuing. And then you just make dates when she reaches out, because quite frankly, she’s not a great candidate. She’s not a great dating prospect because in essence, she’s still married to somebody else. And especially in this case, with her going back and forth, it’s like the more you try to force somebody that’s going back and forth between you and the husband to choose you, the more she’s going to continue to jump back and forth between you and the husband.
And who knows, it may maybe even another guy out there. It’s it’s the same thing. It has the same effect of trying to chase a cat around the room when it no longer wants to be petted. And that’s basically what this guy is doing. And that’s the opposite of being calm and masculine and stoic. He’s totally uncentered acting needy, acting neurotic, and it’s unattractive. That’s why she’s going to bounce back and forth because he’s not acting masculine enough to attract her consistently to him. And so, when he acts like a beta male and chases her out of his life, it literally chases her right back into the arms of the supposed ex-husband to be.
And it’s obvious that it doesn’t sound like the ex-husband wants to be the ex-husband and he wants to stay with his wife. So, when this guy acts attractive, she’s attracted to him and less attracted to the ex-husband. But when you’re vacillating back and forth like that and you’re all over the ice. I mean, this kind of thing, it’s just it rakes you over the coals emotionally, and it’s like, why do it to yourself? So, you just you got to follow what’s in the book. And this guy is obviously not doing it.
But then again, I wouldn’t me personally, I wouldn’t be involved with somebody like this. But it is what it is. He is where he is and he’s into this girl. They’ve been dating a year, so it’s easy for us to sit here and watch this and say, “oh yeah, toss her to the side, on to the next.” But he wrote in because he wanted my help. And as a coach, you have to serve the customer. You have to serve the clients. Your job is to help them achieve their outcome, whether or not you agree with it or not. Obviously, I’m going to give my two cents on it, but it’s their lives. They have to live with the results of their choices and their decisions.
And when I backed away she came back talking about how it’s the worst mistake she ever made so we got passed that and it’s been good for three months.
As the book teaches, the guy really just starts the courtship off. But typically, two, three, four weeks in, women are going to be calling and texting you or FaceTiming you every couple of days, and then you just use that as an opportunity to set the next date. But when you’re trying to speed things up because that’s what this guy is doing, he’s trying to rush her, falling in love with him.
He’s trying to rush her, finalizing her divorce so she can be with him and then he can feel a sense of peace because that’s what’s happening. He doesn’t feel a sense of peace with her. And so, he’s trying to force things so he can get to that place of peace. But because he’s driven by fear, he’s making what he fears happen, which is her going back to her husband. He’s making it happen. Because he’s so he’s doing so many unattractive things that it turns her off and she is more attracted to her husband, because at the time, her husband will be acting more masculine.
Well she did it again she was lying about talking to him in that way she has told me multiple times that she knows she can’t be friends with him for this reason but finally admitted that she had been talking to him.
Well, the other thing is she’s lying to you. And so you’re pursuing a woman that’s lying. You’re pursuing a woman that, in essence, is cheating on her husband, because if she goes back to her husband, she’s technically back in the relationship with him. And you’re trying to, in essence, rip off another dude’s wife, even though you yourself are going through a divorce. And in this particular case, at this point, because of her circumstances and the fact that she’s vacillating, she should be doing 100% of the pursuing. You should never call or text her or reach out for any reason.
And in this case, if she complains about it, you’re just like, hey, you’ve been bouncing back and forth between me and your husband, and quite frankly, you do, based on your actions, do not seem like you’re really serious about getting a divorce. I’m just basically your occasional side piece, if you will. And I’m looking for loyalty, monogamy, exclusivity. On top of that, you’ve been lying to me about things, so that doesn’t look good for you and your prospects as potentially to be a girlfriend of mine. There’s no way we’re going to be girlfriend and boyfriend or we’re going to date exclusively while you’re still with your husband. That’s just that’s silly for me to be in an exclusive relationship with a married woman, in essence.
I told her she needs to make a decision once and for all that it’s me or him.
Well, in this particular case, I wouldn’t be doing that just because, again, she’s married. You want her to be the one that’s trying to win you over and trying to get you to commit to her. And instead, you’re seeking her attention and validation. In essence, you’re acting like the girl. You’re acting like the chick. And that’s why it turns her off so much. This is despite the fact me personally, I would never be involved with somebody like this. And you could see why, but you’re making the situation worse by over pursuing instead of just being totally indifferent to it.
You can take it or leave it. If the cat wants to sit in your lap, great. If not, whatever. She’s still married. She’s with her husband. She’s lied. So, when you have somebody that’s willing to lie and cheat like that and deceive you, it’s like, that’s it. You’re. She’s disqualified from being a loyal, monogamous, long term romantic prospect. You just got to look at her. It’s a party girl, hookup girl, somebody to hang out with while I’m in the process of getting my own divorce until I find somebody who’s single and ready and willing to mingle.
She told me that she can’t make a decision or doesn’t want to so she’s just gonna be single that way she can do whatever she wants guilt free.
I mean, yeah, it’s understandable. You got to love in such a way that the person you love feels free and you’re not making her feel free. You’re making her feel like she needs to get away from you. You’re doing the opposite of indifference. You’re doing the opposite of what the book teaches.
She still gives the mixed signals saying she loves me and acts like she wants to come back.
But it doesn’t matter. You have to see reality as it is. She’s not somebody that’s really loyal and trustworthy because you’ve caught her lying multiple times.
When somebody shows red flags like that, you can’t just ignore those things and go, oh, I just I’ll just wish it away and that’ll fix it because you can ignore reality, but you can’t ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. And so even if you say she goes through with the divorce, eventually at some point when she’s not happy, she’ll probably start inviting attention from other men because she’s just not a loyal person and she’s not honest either. And you can’t fix that. It’s not your job to fix that. You got to see it as it is, though, and recognize, hey, you know what? Her family screwed her up. It’s not my fault. It’s her family’s fault. But because you’re ignoring reality and you’re projecting your interest and your fantasy of what you want this girl to be, you’re creating all these problems for yourself by over pursuing her.
My question is should I back off or do the no contact to turn her around or should I completely be done because it keeps happening. I want to be with her but I can’t keep doing the back and forth.
Well, you keep trying to force things and you should have been able to recognize the pattern because it’s happened, it looks like four times now. So, every time you start pursuing this girl, what happens? You pursue too much. She bounces back to her husband, then you back off and then she comes back. Oh, it’s the worst mistake I ever made. Oh, I’m in love with you. You shouldn’t give a shit one way or another. It’s like, hey, come on over. I wouldn’t be taking this girl on on dates. Because if the husband is trying to get back together with her and you’re going out on dates in public, it’s like, do you really want to run into this guy, or his friends or his family? It’s like, I wouldn’t, I would just treat her like what she really is. She’s a booty call and a friend with benefits. And quite frankly, she’s disqualified from long term romantic prospects.
So, if you still want to hook up with her, I would just never call or text her for any reason. When you do hear from her, invite her over, hang out, have fun and hook up and say, see you later when she leaves. Either later that night or in the morning. It’s call me later. That’s it. You don’t pursue somebody like this. And if she complains about it, you’re just like, look, you’re married, you have a husband. So, it’s like I’m getting my divorce, but you are bouncing back and forth. So really, all we’re doing is carrying on an affair, in essence, Me personally, I wouldn’t be involved in this. But you do. You boo boo.
Second Viewer’s Email:
Hello Coach Wayne,
I have been your student for a year and a half, and I have closely followed your teachings, reading your book multiple times.
Well, it’s one thing to read the book, but the most important thing is the actions and the experiences that you gain by actually going out on dates and interacting with women, seducing them. Dating them, communicating with them, overcoming problems and challenges together. Friction, looking for red flags because you’re trying to vet these your prospects or you want to make sure if you’re looking for long term loyalty, monogamy, exclusivity, they’ve got to have the character that backs that up. They’ve got to have the character that aligns with those values. And way too often when we in my phone sessions, when I see emails like this, these guys are projecting their interests, their high interest on these women and ignoring the fact that they’re ignoring characters destiny and they’re ignoring the fact, just like the the first girl. I mean, this guy’s been following me for a while and he’s familiar with my work, and yet it’s not clicking with him that she’s not a good long term prospect.
She’s just a fuck buddy or a friends with benefits Sex playmate party girl. It’s like an occasional booty call. That’s it. Nothing else. She’s not capable of anything else. And you’re trying to turn her. You’re trying to turn a ho into a housewife. It’s like these are the girls you have fun. It’s good for rebound sex. It’s good to. To blow the barrels out while you look for somebody else. Because if you have a few girls like this and then you’re really looking for a good quality woman, it helps you remain indifferent all the time and not attach to anything or any one particular girl. And then you’ve got the girls fighting for your attention and trying to get your attention and validation instead of you begging for scraps, in essence.
Recently, I have found success in the field of relationships thanks to your video lessons and the practical steps I have taken, although I may have neglected the theory aspect a bit.
Well, this is why I say read it 10 to 15 times. You have to get to know the material so well you can teach it because there’s pick up skills, there’s dating skills and there’s relationship skills. And you have to understand all of them and know it backwards and forwards. Because when you just read a handful of times and you’re trying to cherry pick out of videos, you come off as robotic and you’re missing things, you’re missing cues. Because I mean, you got to understand, we’ve all been propagandized and conditioned by the same movies and TV to basically adopt dysfunctional, unnatural behaviors and ways of living that are completely out of harmony with nature and the way the creator made us. And so when you live in a way that is congruent with the creator’s laws, if you will, or the masculine and feminine energy, things are pretty easy and effortless.
Bad people get bounced out of your life. Good people effortlessly flow right in and just like putting on an old pair of comfortable shoes that you’ve worn a thousand times, it feels really comfortable, really easy, really effortless. That’s what you’re looking for. But when you’re cherry picking like this, it’s like you’re going to have a hell of a time because you’re so wrapped up in your head mentally of trying to get the girl. You’re seeking her attention and validation instead of letting her come to you and choose you and win you over. And so when you’re trying to get her attention like that, it’s almost impossible to see the red flags because you’re so desperate to get her to choose you or commit to you or want to be around you instead of having the attitude of, Hey, let the best girl win. She’s got to be easy going, easy to get along with, communicate well, otherwise, like, I don’t really care. It’s okay. You can stay. You can go. It doesn’t matter to me. I love having you around, but you got to behave this way when we’re together. And if you can’t, then we can be occasional friends with benefits. But that’s as far as it’s going to go.
A couple of months ago, I reconnected with a girl who attended the same university course years ago. I immediately noticed that she had changed, becoming more mature, and I was immediately attracted to her. After a few weeks, we kissed at a party and started going out together. Initially, things were going great: we saw each other regularly, spent the night together from the second date, and even increased the frequency of our meetings to three times a week. However, before she left for a 10-day work trip, I was worried because I knew her ex was also on the trip.
So, this is part of the vetting process. This is why you don’t go. Goo Goo Ga Ga. I love her. We’re soulmates. She’s the one for me. Because when you act all dopey like that, this is the kind of stuff; this is why you vet, this is why you date. Because remember, women can hide who they are. I mean, all of us, for that matter, can hide who we are for about the first 90 days. And so, this is part of the vetting process. What is her life like? Who are the men that are in her life? Are there good men in her life that are brothers and uncles and father and grandfather that taught her good sense of morals and honor and integrity? Or is she a girl that comes from a broken home and she’s got tons of male orbiter’s, ex boyfriends in the background, guys that she dated for a little bit but friend zoned, but yet allows to stay in her life because she likes the attention.
In this particular case, she’s got an ex going on the trip. And so, your attitude should be like, hey, if the ex is on a trip, if she feels comfortable and you’re not giving her grief about it and you’re not attached, you’re not in a relationship, you’re not exclusive, she’ll probably tell you what’s going on. But if you become jealous and angry and controlling, she’ll just hide this stuff from you. And what you’re trying to do is assess her character at this point in time, to determine whether or not she even has the value system in order to be able to be the long-term prospect that you’re looking for.
But when you’re focused on getting her to choose you, it’s like everything else goes out the window because you’re only focused on the goal, and you’re emotionally anchored to that goal and you’re totally attached to it. And then so that’s why it drives you crazy when these women are all over the place because they’re they’re like cats. They come and go. Getting upset at women is about as productive as getting pissed off that the weather is not what you wanted it to be. It’s just stupid. It’s a waste of time. It’s a waste of energy. It’s counterproductive. It’s unattractive, because masculinity is calm.
It’s like the guys in the red pill community. They’re all modern women. They’re getting all upset and butt hurt at women. It’s like, well, most of them are a bunch of fucking pussies. And number two, they haven’t taken the time to learn and understand how attraction actually works.
And they also do a shitty job of vetting the women that they get involved with. And it’s like you can see why. First guys involved with a woman that’s basically bouncing back and forth and he’s like, oh, we’re meant to be. And yet he’s ignoring the reality that he’s just her sidepiece. It’s like you got to see reality as it is.
Despite that, we kept in regular contact, and she confessed to missing me, even writing down her feelings about us in her diary.
Well, if you’re several weeks in and you’ve read the book several times, she should be doing 90-95% of the pursuing at this point. The calling and the texting and the contact initiation should mostly be done by her. I was talking to a guy yesterday, he’s read my book several times and he’s like, oh, I pursued this girl 50/50. And so, the whole time he was dating her for the past year, she never got to the point where she fell in love. And she wasn’t a good prospect to begin with. But what exacerbated the situation is he was constantly over pursuing and so she never fell deeply, head over heels in love with him. And that’s why it was so easy for her to jerk him around and blow him off because she didn’t respect him as a man, because he didn’t act like a man consistently.
And that just made matters worse. When he displayed beta male behavior in her interest was low. She was an asshole to him. So, it’s understandable. If she was head over heels in love, she would have treated him better. But ultimately, she wasn’t a good prospect. But he was so focused on trying to lock her down, he couldn’t see what the hell was really going on.
When she returned last week, I pushed the situation a bit to see her again, insisting that we meet up.
Yeah. Men don’t behave this way, do little boys that are desperate and didn’t get enough strokes or mommy and daddy. That’s how they behave. It’s unattractive, dude.
I’m sorry, Coach, I know I made a mistake.
He was like, you just can’t behave that way. And you shouldn’t be surprised that it turns her off.
In the end, she agreed, and we had dinner at her place.
And remember, he’s begging her to spend time with him. It’s totally unattractive. It’s the opposite of confidence. It’s like in that case, you’re giving off the vibe like, I need you to be my mommy. Please stroke me on the head. Tell me I’m a good little boy. That’s. It’s unattractive. It turns women’s stomach.
However, things felt different, something was off.
Yeah. You turned her off. That’s what was off. And if she was resistant to meet up with you, she’d be like, All right, no problem. When your schedule clears up, give me a call. That’s what indifference would do. You’re like, hey, I’d love to see you. I’m not sure this week’s kind of crazy. Work’s been crazy. I got to unpack for my trip. You’ll hear shit like that. And the only thing you’re not hearing is. Oh, I’d love to see you. I miss you. And so, when you hear excuses and she’s busy. Oh, work’s crazy. Life’s crazy. The trip was crazy. When you hear that, you got to just cut through the bullshit and go. She’s not excited, she’s not jumping a fence to be with me. She’s sitting on the fence going, I don’t know, I got all these things going on.
And that’s like the cat going, oh, I’m kind of bored. I don’t want to sit in your lap, and you should just be like, hey, whatever; I’m going to go pet another kitty cat. Call me when you change your mind. Call me when you’re available. Call me. Well, hey, when things settle down, get in touch. I’d love to see you. I got to run. Talk to you later. Boom. That’s it. You’re out. That’s what Indifference would do. But when you’re attached, attach like you have to meet me. We got to get together. I got to catch. I got so many things to tell you. That’s not how men act. This is like little boys act this way. Needy, little insecure, neurotic boys act that way. Not men. Not calm masculine men.
The next morning, she seemed deep in thought.
Because more than likely he was reaching out to her and texting her because he could tell that she was off. And he’s, like desperate to find out where he stands again. This is the opposite of masculinity. He’s acting like a chick, an insecure chick.
So, I asked her what was on her mind. She said that she wouldn’t like me, but I tried to act indifferent. After about half an hour, I sat down on her couch…
So, I guess he stayed the night
…and asked her to come closer. I managed to open her up, and she confessed that she is still attached to her past with her ex,
The guy that was on the trip
saying, “It’s not so much about him, but about what I experienced with him.”
So, what she’s basically saying is my ex still makes my pussy as wet as Niagara Falls because of what she feels it’s all about what he makes her feel. And the guy that wrote the email is causing her pussy to feel like the Sahara Desert because he’s not acting masculine. That’s what she’s trying to communicate, but is not going to put it in words that’s going to upset him, or cause him to get jealous, or cause him to lose his shit. But most guys hear an explanation like, it’s not so much about him, but about what I experienced with him.
So that sounds like she went and screwed her ex-boyfriend on the trip. That’s what it sounds like to me. Maybe I’m wrong, but she’s obviously into the ex-boyfriend and that’s why he was uncomfortable. But you have no time in with this girl. This guy just started seeing her. The ex, they might have been together for a couple of years, so she’s emotionally bonded to him. So, from a leverage perspective, the other guys got all the leverage. And if you try to force yourself, you’re going to lose. You’re totally upside down. You have no leverage at all on her. And so, trying to force her to do something, you might get some temporary good results, but it’s going to go sideways. And in this particular case, you’ve got to recognize it for what it is. And she’s just one of the girls that you’re dating. That’s what indifference would be.
But instead, you’re trying to force yourself into her life because you worry, and you feel threatened by the ex and that you’re going to lose her to him. It’s like you should be doing the opposite. She should be the one trying to lock you down and pushing the ex away, and telling you that the ex is out of the picture, and you should have the attitude like, well, you’re still kind of seeing your ex and it’s obvious you’re not over him. I like you. I like having fun with you but you know, I’m not ready to get into a relationship with you when you’re not over that dude. But I’d still like to casually date and see you when we’re both available and our schedules line up. That’d be great. That’s the attitude that you want to have.
During our conversation, it almost seemed like she wanted to end things with me, saying, “You won’t talk to me anymore, right?”
So, in other words, if she says, I want to try things on my ex, this guy is going to get pissed off and not want to talk to her anymore. But I would just say, well, if you’re going to explore things, go, go explore that and figure that out. And once you resolve it, get in touch. And if I’m still available, we can go out on a date. Just like that. Take it or leave it. In other words, you’ll interact with her. But it’s got to be on conditions that are favorable to you. Not when she’s still trying to figure things out with her ex. That’s why you literally push her into his arms. You’re like, well, go figure that out and then give me a call later. And then what happens is she goes and tests the shit out of him because she’s not hearing from you now and then typically, that guy is going to just fold like a cheap deck chair because he’s probably a beta male anyways.
And then guess what happens a week or two later? She’s like, Hey, I miss you. I got some clarity on my situation.
But I remained calm and made jokes about the situation. She said, “I had a strong physical attraction to you, but now I’m not sure.”
So, it’s all about feelings. It’s not about logic here. That’s why logic and reason doesn’t work. There’s there’s no argument that’s going to cause her to feel desire for you. She has to feel that on her own. It’s a scientific fact that women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. This is why you let them come to you at their pace.
And I jokingly replied, “Is it because I cut my hair, right?” We continued to laugh and kiss while addressing this situation, and made love right away after.
It’s like, okay, cool. Because he he communicated his indifference with the joke. So, it was a good recovery there. But the bad thing is him trying to force himself. And so, she’s basically saying, I may choose the other guy. And and his attitude was indifference. He was like ehh, and he made a joke about it. And what happened? Boom, instant attraction. And then they had sex. You see how that works? But you’ve got to be consistent. And the problem is he’s consistently inconsistent, just like the first guy. And so, we want to clean up that behavior. So, you consistently getting her feeling more and more attraction, instead of her attraction going like this. And that’s what’s happening. Both these guys, it’s like a yo yo and that’s why it’s driving them nuts and they’re driving themselves nuts because they’re still pursuing too much and trying to force things.
Immediately after that conversation, I felt the same positive vibes as if nothing had changed, the same affection and behaviors. However, after a couple of days, when I suggested scheduling another appointment for this weekend,
Again in this situation I’d be letting this girl do most of the pursuing, but he’s still trying to force it.
She was vague in her response. Should I write to her, maybe on the same day I would like to go out with her?
No, dude, it’s just. Let it go. You got to follow the book. She should be doing most, if not all, of the pursuing, especially in this case, because she’s also got the ex in the background. And from what she said, it sure sounds like she hooked up with the ex on the trip. And so, when you try to force things in a situation like that, it’s the opposite of indifference. You should just have the attitude of, hey, call me later. Hey, all right, no problem, when you figure out, your schedule, get back in touch, I’d love to see you. Just leave it like that. That’s it. That’s all you got to do.
Or should I wait for her to write to me again?
Wait for her to write you again. Because when you’re trying to set a date and she’s like ehh. Well, it’s like hitting the ball over the net, right? You hit the ball over the net and she’s just like ehh. She acknowledged it, but she doesn’t make it easy to make plans. When women really like you and their interest is high, they’ll make it easy to get together with them, and when they don’t, you’ll get vagueness in their responses. And the vagueness just communicates I’m not feeling like I want to see you right now. And so, you should be like, okay. Don’t call her. Don’t text her. Let her do all the pursuing. Let her come to you. Both of these women and these situations are involved with other dudes and exes, and the guys have all the leverage. You have to let them come to you at their pace.
And in general, how should I behave in this situation?
Best regards. You the man!!
Well follow the book. It would help if you would read it 10 to 15 times as instructed and continue to date other women, because it’s obvious, she’s dating and sleeping with other guys, one of them being her ex. And it’s like you you basically are acting like you’re in a relationship with her, and you’ve stopped dating other women, and yet she’s dating another guy.
She’s keeping her options open. Same thing with the first girl. She’s like, I don’t want to be attached. I want to be single, and I want guilt free. Give them what they want. You’re the prize. You’re the one that women should be trying to lock down. And again, both these guys are doing the opposite of what the book teaches. Indifference makes the difference. It really is your attraction superpower when you apply it. Both these guys have seen when they’ve been indifferent, it works wonders, like it’s literally instantaneous. Like this dude had sex with the girl right afterwards when he communicated indifference through his playfulness and his joking and like his take it or leave it attitude. But when she’s vague in her responses, you give her more indifference. You’re like, okay, well, when you figure it out, let me know. And just wait to hear from her. And when the attraction slowly returns to a high enough level, should reach out. And then you try to set the date. Got to follow the book.
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