It Took Losing 3 Women Before I Took Corey Wayne Seriously!

How to attract & keep the women you want to avoid rejection.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who says he first heard about my work back in 2011, but didn’t take me seriously. He shares how he got tired of chasing women out of his life that he really loved and wanted and after experiencing enough painful rejection, he started watching my videos, reading 3% Man and applying it successfully.

My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Better late than never!

So this particular email is from a viewer who says he found my work all the way back in 2011, so it was like 15 years ago. He said, like a lot of guys, he watched or saw some of the videos and he’s like, “What does this guy know?” And he was dismissive, blew it off. It wasn’t until he lost a third girl that he thought, “You know, maybe I should listen to that dude.” So he’s finally got around to reading the book after 14 years maybe or so, and it worked better than he expected.

So let’s go through his email, because pain is life’s change agent. It’s life’s way of letting you know that what you’re doing is sub-optimal and not working. As Ayn Rand said, “You can ignore reality, but you can’t ignore the consequences of ignoring reality.”

Viewer Email:

Hey Coach,

First of all I wanted to say thanks for your work, it’s completely changed my mindset and how I look at the world, especially relationships. I first stumbled upon your YouTube videos around 2011 but never watched any of them. I was 18 at the time and thought, “This guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

I get that a lot. I figured I don’t look like the type of dude that would understand this stuff on this level, so you can ignore me at your own peril. As I always say, even if you think I’m totally full of shit, if you read my books, which are free to read in the Members Area of my website, including Mastering Yourself, you’ll get better results than you were getting on your own. The proof is in the pudding. Plus, there’s great reviews all over the place.

My first life lesson of pain was when I was 19, I was completely infatuated with a girl in our friend group.

We’ve all been there when we were young, dumb, full of cum, didn’t know any better.

I was the epitome of a beta Bob at this time, she strung me along for two years by giving me the occasional make out sesh and reassuring words.

So she liked the attention and validation you gave her while she went off and slept with Chad Thundercock. Sounds like you were part of her Frankenstein boyfriend project.

I was super needy, unstable, and sensitive.

Well, masculinity is calm, and you were the opposite.

Our last interaction was me crying because she told me she had slept with some other guys. She got up and left and said, “I can’t do this anymore.” I never saw her again.

Ouch! I had a guy that I knew many years ago that was a platinum partner of mine, and he was overweight, nice guy, successful. He was dating another girl who, I don’t think she was a platinum partner. I think she was like master university, and she was hot. So he was dating her and he didn’t really completely understand women. I don’t think he ever learned, but he was dating her, and he’s like, “Oh, it’s great! My girlfriend is so awesome,” and she was hot. She was cool. Liked hanging out with her. She liked hanging out with us. She was a lot of fun.

So they were having sex one time. So basically she was having sex. She was on top of him. Then she just got off and was like, “I can’t do this anymore,” and basically proceeded to tell him she like felt nothing for him. Then she left and he was just devastated. So he went off and married some like, really ugly girl. I’d say that kind of messed him up a little bit, and he’s still fat. So what are you gonna do? But it happens. I mean, that’s got to be humiliating. You’re having sex and you think, “Man, I did a good job,” and then she’s like, “I can’t do this anymore. See you later, pal!” He had no idea. He had no idea that she wasn’t into it. So obviously he’s crying.

My second life lesson of pain came in a different city, away from my home town. I met a new girl at university and she was the most cool, laid back, and fun chick I had ever come across. I remember when I met her I thought, “Everything I did with the first girl, I just have to do the opposite with this one.” I was about 24 at the time and we had a great relationship that lasted for six years. There were a few speed bumps during that time but nothing we couldn’t overcome. However, I eventually reverted back to my 19 year old self and drove her away permanently.

So he chased her out of his life as well. Too much unattractive and unmanly behavior.

This destroyed me for years as I thought she was the one.

Well, there’s always another one. There’s another bus every 15 minutes. There are people that we are destined to meet. What’s meant for you won’t miss you, but when you’re young and you don’t have a lot of experience, you lose one or two girls and it feels devastating, like you’re just never going to get any better. Because up until that point in your life, you’ve never had a life experience with somebody that lit you up on the inside like that, and when you think about all the other girls that you tried to date or dated, and it never went anywhere, then you meet somebody that really lights you up in the inside and then you ruin it, that stings. That hurts. Then you think, “That’s it, I’m never gonna meet anybody else. I lost the one.” That’s a fantasy. There’s always somebody else.

Another thing that’s comforting is to understand that you never have really done anything wrong. You only did what you were supposed to do. What happened, happened, and it couldn’t have happened any other way. These girls came along and he experienced a lot of pain because he wasn’t willing to change. It wasn’t until he experienced the pain of the second rejection, because after the first one is devastating enough. Then this one, he was with her for six years, and despite all that time together, she still rode off into the sunset, and that’s tough as a man to just see a girl that really likes you to slip away like that, and you don’t understand what the hell happened or why. Then she gives you explanations when you ask and they don’t make sense. That sucks. It’s like you’re in the dark. It’s like rooting around in the dark somewhere with dead batteries or batteries that are about to die. It’s just hard to find your way. That’s why my books give you the cheat codes to life. I did all the hard work.

To add to this, I recently found out she has a new partner, and this really added salt to the wound. And BTW, I still haven’t watched any of your videos or content at this point.

So he’s hard-headed.

My third lesson of pain came about two years after my second one. I met a girl at a party one day, and she was a fiery one. She had a strong personality, tested a lot, and was very structured. Basically the opposite of my second one. Before meeting her was when I decided to start consuming your content, including reading the book (five times).

So it took two devastating breakups. I mean think about it: Six years with the second one, two years of, in essence, being stuck in friend-zone and having blue balls, occasional kissy-poo. So that’s eight years of his life with two women that both disappeared and went off like the first one. He never heard from her again. I mean, after that performance crying, “Stella, darling!” And she takes off, like that’s brutal. As you get older, you look back on that, like when you’re my age, you’re gonna laugh at yourself. It will be funny. Maybe you’ll have kids, your sons that you’re telling that to. It’s like, “Don’t do what I did.”

Your teachings worked very well, too well in fact. The I love you’s came out in two months, and she started telling people at work we were girlfriend/boyfriend.

Well, if you’re following what’s in the book, usually week six, week seven, she should be in love with you.

However, as you say, the book will bring out someone’s worse side and that’s exactly what happened.

Well, it brings out the best in the best and the worst in the worst.

In short, she was the 19-year-old version of me. Needless to say this one ended in a train wreck. Admittingly, I did project my previous relationship on this one. I constantly compared and was resentful when she didn’t live up to my expectations or standards of my previous. 

Well, it’s not fair to do that to judge the new girl by the old ones. Same thing. It’s not fun and it’s not right when a girl you’re dating is comparing you to the past exes, or assuming that you’re just as much as a shit-bird as they were.

When I look back at these three relationships, I am very grateful for all of them. They have helped me set the standard for what I want and deserve. Currently I am single, and have been for five months and am enjoying life again without carrying the emotional weight and pain of my previous relationships. Again, your work has helped me tremendously with this. 

Well yeah, because it helps you re-frame your mind and your mindset to understand. It’s just like a space rocket blowing up. You’re going to learn a lot. You’re going to figure out where your design flaws are, where the flaws in your approach are, and hopefully you make adjustments so your love rocket doesn’t blow up. Well, it blows up obviously inside of her, hopefully, but not on the launch pad.

I know for a fact that as long as I keep walking in the direction I’m supposed to, there’s a good chance my next serious partner will be the woman of my dreams.

Well again, you’ve still got like, the oneitis. So that puts a lot of pressure on yourself, and there’s just no reason to. What’s meant for you won’t miss you, and if it really is truly somebody you’re gonna have a long-term relationship, maybe a family, maybe you’re gonna get married and live happily ever after, I highly recommend a prenup. Should probably follow James Sexton for you guys, he’s a very famous divorce attorney. You should follow that guy because he gives a lot of great content on that and really goes into detail. The reality is couples that assign prenups, they tend to work out. They tend to stay together versus couples that get married and don’t do a prenup. So there’s that. Because if you can go through prenuptial process and negotiate that and come out the other side as a win-win deal, then you’re able to resolve your differences pretty diplomatically and statistically, you have a higher chance of your marriage lasting if you do a prenup versus not having one.

So again, I wouldn’t be looking at the next girl is going to be the woman of your dreams because that’s a mental concept. Maybe you got two or three more relationships to go through before you settle down and have kids. So your job is to be the best man that you can be, be the best version of you and master what’s in the book. If you really, truly are ready to settle down and have a family, white picket fence and the whole nine yards, and you’re really ready for it, it’ll happen, but I wouldn’t put the pressure on yourself saying, “Well, the next one is definitely gonna be it. She’s going to be the one.” Because more than likely, I found when you think that way, it probably won’t be. It happens when you least expect it, when you’re most open to it and you’re most ready. Especially when you’re stable as a man, you’re doing well in your business, you’re doing well in your career, everything’s going great.

To all the other aspiring 3%ers watching this, keep reading the book, it will change your life in many ways.

Well, you’ve only been through it five times, I believe. Remember, 10-15 times, dude. Because when you get into a relationship with another girl that knocks your socks off, if you got knowledge gaps or holes in your game, you will get exposed because a good woman is going to do that. She’s going to find the chinks in your armor and help you become a better man.

If I had read the book at 19, I would’ve avoided a lot of pain, but better late than never.

Love,

Bob

Well, only took 14 years, I guess. So good on you ,dude. Thanks for sharing that. Again, you got life. Pain is life’s change agent, and if you ignore the pain, you will experience more pain.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

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