Losing Yourself & Becoming A Pleaser

Jun 3, 2015 by Coach Corey Wayne

Loving CoupleHow to prevent losing yourself in a relationship slowly over time, and how becoming a pleaser to become what a woman wants will lead to her losing respect, attraction and interest in you, which will lead to your being dumped.

In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who describes his slow decent over time into becoming a pleaser to appease his girlfriend and become what she said she wanted. He eventually gave up a promising career he was passionate about, gave up his friends and all the things that attracted her to him in the beginning. His friends all stopped calling and wanting to hang out with him, because they knew he would just blow them off. This eventually led to him getting dumped, even though he never was really that into her in the first place. He chased and begged afterwards, to which she literally laughed in his face.

He started following my work about two years ago and started turning things around. He started working out again, resumed his career, reconnected with his friends and rebuilt his life. He is now engaged to a woman he actually is in love with and adores. His life is better than ever. It’s another great, inspiring success story of what a man needs to focus on in life to attract and keep the woman of his dreams.

Hey Corey,

I started watching your videos a couple years ago right after an ex and I broke up. I was always a natural at getting girls, and didn’t know why until I found out everything you were teaching is what I was doing. I always had a drive for success, was confident, and wanted to better myself everyday; Portrait businessman and businesswoman together so much that I hated texting or calling people, because I had stuff I wanted to do. (Just use the phone for setting dates.) When we first started dating, I followed my mission of being successful, and if she wanted to hang out, it would be when I wasn’t busy. The things that I did made my ex want to spend every minute with me, and she always said, “You’re going be the one to break this heart. I know it.” I loved the girl, but I was never head over heels in love. (Rejection breeds obsession, but you never put in the effort because you weren’t really into the girl.)

As time went on through the relationship, by listening to what she was telling me, I slowly stopped working out and achieving greater success, even to the lengths of quitting a successful school career, and quitting hanging out with my friends to the point where no one would even call me because they knew I would blow them off, all to please her because that’s what “she wanted.” (When a woman falls in love with you, they want your attention all the time, but you should never give up who you are. The right woman for you is someone who supports your goals and dreams.) Fast-forward two years, and she ended up dumping me; as you can imagine, I was shocked. Man pleading with his crying partner on the couch I don’t think I wanted her back because I was in love with her, but more for the fact that she dumped me, and it made me feel like I was worthless. (Your identity becomes associated with being in the relationship with that person. When they choose to not be in your life, you lose yourself.) Something I never would have done before is that I begged her to take me back, because that’s how I thought guys got back the girl thanks to the good ole movie makers; she actually laughed in my face. Luckily after this, I took whatever I had left of my balls, and didn’t look back. This made me feel like the world’s biggest bitch, and I can see why she didn’t take me back. The wake from all of this made me lose connection with friends, a good career and being in shape.

I started getting my shit together again, and now am back to working out, hanging out with friends, finishing up my schooling for a very successful career, and am even engaged to a girl that is better than anyone I could have dreamed about. (You’ll either get the ex back or get somebody better if you apply the things I teach in my book. Read the book 10-15 times so it becomes instinctual.) Couple running - sport runners jogging on beach This experience was the worst but best thing that could have happened, and it made me grow in knowledge immensely. I wanted to send you this e-mail to thank you for what you are doing for people, and I felt I should share this story to maybe help one person who was in the same situation I was, because I wish I could have known what I was doing wrong before it was too late. Yes, there needs to be compromise, but don’t stop doing the things you love because you are trying to please the girl. (If you turn into a pleaser, you will get rejected eventually.)

Bob

Get the Book “How To Be A 3% Man”

How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | FREE**
How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | $19.95
How to Be a 3% Man
Audiobook | $19.95
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
How to Be a 3% Man
Kindle eBook | $9.99
How to Be a 3% Man
iBooks eBook | $9.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Lulu eBook | $9.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
How to Be a 3% Man
Paperback | $29.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Hardcover | $49.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Paperback | $29.99
How to Be a 3% Man
Hardcover | $49.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Get the Book “Mastering Yourself”

Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | FREE**
Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | $24.95
Mastering Yourself
Audiobook | $24.95
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
Mastering Yourself
Kindle eBook | $9.99
Mastering Yourself
iBooks eBook | $9.99
Mastering Yourself
Lulu eBook | $9.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Mastering Yourself
Paperback | $49.99
Mastering Yourself
Hardcover | $99.99
Mastering Yourself
Paperback | $49.99
Mastering Yourself
Hardcover | $99.99
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Coach Corey Wayne Merchandise

T-Shirts & Mugs

If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com

If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:

  1. Make a donation to my work by clicking here to donate via PayPal anytime you feel I have added significant value to your life. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck... $2... $3... $5... $10... $20... what ever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, videos, emails, newsletters, etc.
  2. Referring your friends and family to this website so they can start learning and improving their dating and relationship life, happiness, balance and overall success in every area of their lives too!
  3. Purchase a phone/Skype (audio only) coaching session for yourself or a friend by clicking here. Download the Amazon.com Kindle version of my book to your Kindle, Smartphone, Mac or PC for only $9.99 by clicking here. Get the iBook version for $9.99 from the iBookstore by clicking here. Get the Audio Book for FREE $0.00 with an Audible.com membership by clicking here or buy it for $19.95 at Amazon.com by clicking here. Get the iTunes Audio Book for $19.95 by clicking here. That way, you'll always have it with you to reference when you need it most. Thank you for reading this message!

From my heart to yours,

Corey Wayne
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur

“A big mistake a lot of men make when they get into a relationship is that, slowly over time they stop being the ambitious, exciting, confident, fit and interesting men they were that attracted their women to them in the first place. They often give up everything that matters to them in an effort to please and become what their women say they want. This predictably leads to their women losing respect, attraction and romantic interest in them to the point that they get dumped. They no longer focus on being awesome and pursuing their dreams, but instead become pleasers in an effort to become what their women say they want. Men should never give up their dreams, goals, ambitions or healthy eating and exercise habits to please anyone. If they do, they will simply lose themselves and eventually their women will leave them.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne

Published on June 3, 2015

Reader Interactions

Leave A Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

SUGGESTED ARTICLES

PHONE COACHING, EMAIL COACHING & PRODUCTS

1 Hour Phone/Skype Coaching Session

with Coach Corey Wayne
coachingcta-phone-300x200
This is for a one (1) hour phone/Skype (audio only) coaching session with Life & Peak Performance Coach Corey Wayne.

Emergency Email Response Coaching

with Coach Corey Wayne

DISCONTINUED

This is for one (1) emergency email response from Life & Peak Performance Coach Corey Wayne to one (1) email of yours.

Self-Help Products, Books, Supplements, Etc.

Highly Recommended
coachingcta-amazon-300x200
Click the button above to visit my Amazon.com list of recommended self-help products such as books, supplements, appliances, tools, etc.

Self-Help Products, Books, Supplements, Etc.

Recommended by Coach Corey Wayne
coachingcta-amazon-landscape
Click the button above to visit my Amazon.com list of recommended self-help products such as books, supplements, appliances, tools, etc.
How To Support My Work
This is a member supported site. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck, $2, $3, $5, maybe $10? Whatever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, emails, videos, newsletters, etc.
DONATE VIA PAYPAL
Just click the "Donate" button above to enter your donation/gratuity. Thanks in advance for your support! From my heart to yours, Corey Wayne.
Share Page on Social Media:
How To Support My Work
This is a member supported site. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck, $2, $3, $5, maybe $10? Whatever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, emails, videos, newsletters, etc.
DONATE VIA PAYPAL
Just click the "Donate" button above to enter your donation/gratuity. Thanks in advance for your support! From my heart to yours, Corey Wayne.
Share Page on Social Media:
FOLLOW
DONATE
PRODUCTS
SHARE
top