Needing Vs. Wanting

How to navigate the fine line between needing someone vs. wanting them to ensure that they still feel free to come and go as they please, but want to be with you more and more, instead of making them feel smothered and suffocated to the point that they avoid you like the plague or friend-zone you.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss two emails from two different viewers who are struggling because they are uncontrollably vacillating back and forth between wanting their women and needing them. One of them is dating the most beautiful woman he as ever been with and he seems to lose his mind at times with her because he becomes so intoxicated with her beauty and sex appeal.

The other tries to be controlling at times when his former girlfriend who is pregnant with his baby, does not do what he expects. This predictably drives her away and into the arms of a new guy she has started dating after dumping him.

“There is a major difference between wanting someone because you desire them and want to give to them, and needing them because you desire them from a place of lack and scarcity to the point that you come off as smothering, suffocating and controlling out of your own feeling of inferiority and insecurity. The very nature of needing someone is due to a limiting belief that you must possess or control someone because you fear that they won’t want you back consistently out of their own free will, choice and desire. Real love is based upon freedom and giving the gift of yourself, your time and your heart for the sole purpose of contributing to the happiness, welfare and well being of another unconditionally, and without any attachments to getting something in return. The purpose of all relationships is that you go there to give, not to take in order to fill yourself up with what you feel you lack. YOU ARE THE GIFT, and therefore, should only spend your time with people who naturally perceive you to be that way instead of trying to force yourself upon them.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne