How to effectively use the non-action spiritual attraction approach to attract and keep the perfect person who matches your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual ideal of the perfect partner, instead of relying on excessive effort, chance and luck.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss two different emails from two different viewers. The first email is a success story from a viewer who found my work after he got tired of losing one great perfect ten after another, by being too nice and too unprepared to attract and keep the type of women he’s always wanted. He spent most of his life feeling like he was not getting the quality of woman he really wanted. He shares how my work changed his life and dating game for the better, and what he did and said to attract and keep the hottest woman he’s ever been with. The second email is from a viewer who originally thought I was totally full of shit when he first started following my work. He shares how, even though he is only eighteen, women much older and more successful than him, can’t help but be drawn to him. He shares how his confidence and success with women has grown, and how my work has changed his life for the better. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the bodies of their emails.
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First Viewer’s Email:
First of all, I can’t thank you enough for your selflessness in sharing your story and wisdom so those of us who were once struggling can enjoy the relationships we always knew deep down we deserve. (There’s nothing worse than walking around and always feeling like you’re settling for second best, whether it’s getting passed over for a promotion at work or you see a girl you really like and you ask her out, and it doesn’t go well. Instead of getting torn up about things like that, just look at it and say, we just weren’t compatible. If you’re really compatible with someone, it’s easy, not forced. When we keep giving people a chance and they keep burning us, it’s like those people are in our lives for us to learn that when you see this kind of behavior, you need to move them right out of your life and keep moving forward. It’s like a test, and it builds your strength. It builds your armor and makes you stronger. Not only does it help you refocus you on your outcome, but also in deleting people from your life who really don’t share the same goals and values.)
I was the quintessential nice guy, super pleaser who would go out of his way for girls and chase like a woman. I’ve had a few long-term relationships, the longest being five years, but I always felt like I could do so much better. (With the women I really liked, I tended to put them on a pedestal and was super nice, because I didn’t want to fuck it up. But being super nice and not willing to stand up for myself, that would always lead to getting friend zoned or blown off.) I just didn’t know how. Then a year and half ago, I went out on a date with a stunning woman. She was 4’11,” I love the tiny ones, had an incredibly tight but curvy body, long dark hair, dark eyes and olive skin. I over pursued, she dropped me and I felt like enough was enough. (You hit the wall metaphorically.) I googled dating and relationships, and your work popped up. I bought your book, highlighting and underlining the things I recognized I personally needed to work on so I could continue to review. I drive for a living, so your audio book was a Godsend. I’m sure I’ve listened to it about ten times by now as well. I have been seriously practicing over the last year and finally saw some of my efforts come to fruition when I met the girl I am now dating.
I was at the mall, when I walked by a woman who is a complete and total ten, 5’4,” very long, dark hair with blonde highlights, curvy but fit, gorgeous dark eyes, beautiful skin, wearing a long summer dress. (Obviously, you like a certain type of woman, and why settle for somebody that is not completely what you want?) We locked eyes and I gave her a smile, she smiled back at me, looked down and kept walking past me. (You were having these kinds of women coming into your life, but you were always blowing it. It wasn’t until you decided what you were doing was not working and if you kept doing what you have always done, you were going to continue to get what you have always got. You recognized you needed to change your approach and you found my work. You did the work on yourself, and you filled in your knowledge gap.) I could tell she worked at the mall, because she was wearing a name tag. I was heading into the food court to get some lunch and thought to myself, she is an absolute goddess. I am going to talk to her before I leave the mall and see if I like her enough to ask her out. I had lunch and later saw her inside one of the stores. (You didn’t go out of your way to talk to her, because you were busy going to eat. You totally let go of it.) I walked in and began talking to her and could tell immediately she was into me. I grabbed her number and texted her mine, as you suggest, in case she decided to contact me first. (Again, more non-action. You took action by getting her number, but you also waited a few days to get back to her when it was convenient for you.) Well Corey, great advice brother. Two days later, I got a text from her just saying she hoped I was having a good day. (She was trying to force an interaction because she really liked you. These kinds of women are just more fun to date because your first dates just flow effortlessly. They’re excited to be there as well.) I knew she was reaching out to create an opportunity for me to ask her out, so I did! We made a date that was a week away, but instead of being upset I had to wait so long to see her, as I would have done in the past, I welcomed it as an opportunity to work on my patience. I didn’t reach out to her at all during that time, and she did not reach out to me at all either.
I went to pick her up and was extremely nervous, as this is the most gorgeous woman by far that I had ever been out with. So regardless of how it went that night, it was a total victory for me. (In the past, you were very impatient by nature. What’s the root of that impatience? Not thinking you’re good enough. But if you’re coming from the perspective of, “Of course I’m going to get a woman like that. I deserve a woman like that.” When you think you deserve it, you act in ways that communicate, of course. It’s a very matter of fact way of showing up.) Thinking that way helped me to relax. We went out for drinks, and I did all the planning, had the place chosen and made reservations so there would be no hiccups, and she could just have fun. She did about 80 percent of the talking while I leaned back in my chair, taking up too much room, keeping my attention focused entirely on her. She revealed to me that she was attracted to me from the first moment she saw me, but was unsure of whether or not I liked her back. (It’s a scientific fact that women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. You remained mysterious this whole time. Every day that went by, she liked you more and more.) Staring her deep in the eyes, with a James Bond smirk, I told her I knew the second I saw her walking through the mall in her sexy red dress that I wasn’t leaving without her phone number. She blushed and smiled back at me. We are both in leadership roles in our fields, so we got on the topic of good leadership. We both love to read, so I told her about a book I just read about effective leadership. She said she would check it out, this becomes important in a minute. At the end of the date, I took her home and went in for the kiss. She pulled back a little and offered to hug me before she went inside. I was disappointed, but made sure not to show it. I knew this could be a test. I smiled and said, “Of course!” I got out, gave her a hug and walked her to her door. Not having gotten a kiss, I resolved myself to the fact that I might not hear from her again.
The next day, she texted me on her lunch break. She sent a photo of the book I had told her about and said she had just bought it. (What does that tell you? She respects your opinion because she really likes you.) Once again, I knew instantly this was a sign of a high level of attraction, and I knew that she was seeking my approval and looking for another date. I made a date and got off the phone. The night of our date, I picked her up and I noticed immediately she was wearing the same red dress she had worn the day I met her at the mall. (You said you really liked her in that red dress, and she wanted to look good for you. That’s a sign of being submissive.) I knew she did this, because I brought up how sexy she looked in it on our first date and that she clearly wore it to impress me and try to increase my level of attraction for her. We went out for dinner to a restaurant that turned out to be one of her favorites. Again, I had made reservations and took care of all the details so she could just relax and have fun. She did most of the talking, and I just listened, maintaining eye contact and leaning back taking up too much room. At the end of the date she asked if I wanted to go for a drive because she was not ready to go home yet. (In other words, “I want to spend more time with you.”) I agreed and we went for a drive through the country. I suggested we stop at a coffee shop when we returned to the city and we ended up going for a long walk. When we got back in the car, I just looked over at her she said, why are you staring at me like that, with a smile on her face. I told her, I can’t help but appreciate something so beautiful. At that moment, I leaned in and kissed her and she kissed me back. We ended up making out in the car in the parking lot and then again for about 15 minutes when I dropped her off at her place.
It has been over two months and we are still dating, and I have been watching her level of attraction for me climb steadily. There is rarely a moment when she does not have her hands all over me, trying to kiss me or fuck my brains out. She has told me she is not into PDA at all and that it makes her uncomfortable, but whenever we are out together, she is always reaching for my hand, linking her arm in mine or giving me a kiss on the lips. (Attraction level cuts through everything. If the attraction is there, all the rules go out the window.)
Thanks a lot Corey! I couldn’t have done it without you. One thing I can’t stress enough to your other followers and my fellow students is that when you finally meet that dream girl, that’s the time you need to study this stuff even harder! Being cocky and thinking “you got this” is only going to lead to bad things for you down the road. Read the book, do the work and thirty years from now when you’re still fucking your woman like it’s the first time, you’ll be glad you did. (Congratulations. Keep in mind, this is only the first time you’ve been with a woman you feel this way about. You may find in six months, or maybe two or three years from now, the relationship just runs its course. That’s why I think it’s so important to date for several years before you decide to get married, move in together or take your relationship to the next level.)
Thanks again, Corey!
Second Viewer’s Email:
Hey Corey Wayne!
Before I write any further, I just want to thank you for the fucking awesome job that you are doing. Damn dude, you’re the realest person I have ever met. (I’ve found that’s the best way to be, because at the end of the day, people are either going to like you, or they’re not. And the people that really care about you and are really on your team are going to celebrate you being you. That’s why trying to live your life according to other people’s expectations is always going to be a losing proposition. So you might as well completely polarize people into either digging you and thinking you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, or saying “You totally suck,” and “I can’t fucking stand you.” You’ve got to be who you are.)
So lets begin… I am almost 18-years old and a fucking weakling a guy who got offended easily and was teased every day by the people I called best friends. I haven’t talked to my Dad in 5 years. We live together, but we don’t talk. As you can tell, I was a very insecure child who was brought up in a fucked up family, but I do not blame my parents. I have forgiven them, because I realized that if they cant be better parents, I can be a better child, and there are not bad people in this world, there are only people who made bad choices.
I found one of your videos while looking for videos on how to be an Alpha male. As I watched more and more of your videos, I realized that I have been fucking up all my life in every aspect. Relationships, women, friends, the direction my life I was going; I made a firm commitment to myself that I will change my life forever. I joined the gym, started following people I wanted to be, started learning the knowledge I thought I was lacking from money management, to dressing well and communicating well. (If you’re in good shape, you’re going to feel better about yourself. You’re going to like yourself more. And the happier you are, the more attractive you’re going to be to friends, family, lovers, clients, potential employers or random people you encounter on the streets.) The deeper and deeper I went into self-improvement, I realized that my life was changing. I was surrounded by positivity, because I gave out positive vibes. People were more open and friendly towards me. (When you bring a higher vibration to a situation, you’ll notice that other people will tend to become more positive around you. It’s easier and more effortless to be that way than it is to walk around being angry, pissed off and being in a negative vibe all of the time.)
Fast forward, and I am 19 years old and an instructor at the gym I joined two years ago, I am in the best shape of my life, and I look like a fucking A class model now. Friends from my past are stunned by the new personality that I developed, thus they started respecting me even more. (That’s because you developed some self respect, you won’t tolerate bullshit and you set some healthy boundaries. Good for you.) I have done a few modeling shoots in the film industry. Women aged 23-25 are always into me. I don’t know why, but I always seem to attract women older than me, or maybe I do know why, ha-ha. I recently had a 25-year old girl fall head over heels in love with me without even trying in just 2 months. I guess reading your book 20 times paid off. I don’t ever need to feel shy around beautiful women, because they instantly feel comfortable with me. I just have to “HHH’ (Hang out, have fun and hook up), and my confidence is through the roof. Women and most people are stunned when they hear my age, because they say I act so mature. (It’s everything. It’s your look, it’s your vibe and it’s how you feel about yourself. Most guys don’t get there until they’re a lot older, if they ever get there at all.) I recently did a love song video shoot with a beautiful actress, which got 15k hits in 1 month on YouTube. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t easy to be where I am today. I was rejected so many times. I was laughed at so many times. Even after reading your book 15 times, I almost thought you were full of shit, then I realized my mistakes, learned from them, practiced, practiced, practiced, going to the mall, bantering with women, people, having forced that positivity, even though I was having a bad day. (You were taking action, making the effort and working to get better even when it didn’t feel like it. That’s the whole point. It’s doing what you need to do and being okay with the results whenever they happen show up. You weren’t attached to those results. I highly recommend you study Zen. You take action and move towards what you want, and become okay with whatever the universe brings you. You only have control over how you show up and what you do, and when the time is right, the universe will release its reward to you. The key is to not get frustrated or pissed off with where you’re at in life. If you’re upset with where you are, you’re attached to the results. And things aren’t going to change until you let go of that attachment and become okay with things not being the way you think they should be. As long as you keep taking action, refining your approach, eventually you will end up where you want to be. It’s not going to be exactly the way you think it should, but it will fulfill you in ways you never expected.) One thing did help me a lot that when I was 17. I was working in hotel management. I was in the service industry where I practiced most of my communication skills, having a good relationship with my family as well.
It’s 2016 now, and I am going to turn 20 in the month of May. My goal is to retire a billionaire by the age of 30. (It’s possible, but what if you’re only worth $2 million by the time you’re 30? Does that mean you’re a failure? Maybe you were unrealistic in your goal. Remember, we tend to overestimate what we can do in a year, and we tend to underestimate what we can accomplish in a decade. It’s not so much about becoming a billionaire for the sake of being a billionaire. It’s about becoming a person of value.) My goal is to be a man of value — a fucking legend just like you are. I have learned that the greatest pleasures in life are gained by GIVING, thus my next goal is to start up a YouTube channel and teach people what I’ve learned and continue to learn. (I think it’s great dude. You’re doing all the little things you need to be doing. “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”)
P.S. This message comes to you all the way from India. If I get a chance, I’ll kiss your bald head one day.
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
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From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“As you get older and are able to look back upon your life and contemplate why things happened the way they did and why certain people came into and out of your life when they did, you start to see the magical synchronicity, perfection and purpose for what you experienced and learned together. There are no accidents in life. There are no coincidences, and there is no such thing as luck. People who prepare themselves beforehand make their own luck when the right opportunities and circumstances present themselves. It only looks like luck and coincidence to those who don’t prepare themselves to capitalize upon their own opportunities when they present themselves. You’re either preparing to succeed by taking action to get better, or preparing to ponder on what you missed out on by doing nothing.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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