Why having a cocky, playful, humorous and non-serious vibe is the best way keep women attracted, coming back for more and unable to stay away from you for very long.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss four different emails from four different viewers. The first email is from a guy who recently broke up with his girlfriend of three and a half years. He says it was his diligent study of my work that enabled him to win her heart, but he didn’t follow instructions, got complacent and eventually lost her. The second email is from a woman who not only loves and agrees with my work, but she shares some epiphanies she recently had about herself and how being too masculine and not feminine enough has caused her tremendous suffering in life and her relationships.
The third email is from an eighteen-year old guy who is in constant conflict and disagreement with his twenty two year old sister. She breaks his balls and tells him that what Tony Robbins and I teach is brainwashing him and doesn’t work. He doesn’t know how to deal with her. I tell him what to do to have her purring like a kitten and finally treating him with respect. The fourth email is from a viewer who is now twenty three and started following and implementing my work when he was nineteen and had just gotten dumped by his girlfriend. He not only got her back applying what I teach, but he’s enjoyed a series of epic personal and professional successes during and after his college career applying what he learned from me. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the bodies of their emails.
First Viewer’s Email:
Every time I read your book, every time I watch one of your videos, it hurts. It makes me suffer. But don’t get this the wrong way. The pain which I am experiencing whilst engaging myself in your teachings is not one I run away from. It’s as though the true masculine man deep inside of me is breaking through my bones and ripping through my skin. Crawling with everything he’s got to surface. Essentially giving new birth to the real me, morphing into my natural state, one that was altered and crippled after many years of not understanding how masculine and feminine energy works and not allowing me to flow with the current.
I was able to get my first long-term girlfriend, a partner of 3.5 years, and I was successful in doing so, because that was the time I started reading your book and had applied the things you were teaching.
So far, so good. I’ve probably said this hundreds and hundreds of times in videos over the years. Guys start getting success, they start getting laid, they’re hooking up and things are going well. The girl starts to fall in love, and the guy’s thinking, “Hey, I got it. I finally arrived. I’m one of the exceptions to the rule. I don’t need to read Corey’s fucking book 10-15 times, because I’m special. I’m smarter than everybody else.” Well, obviously we know different now.
Mind-blown by how the things I’ve been reading about are actually true, seeing it with my very own eyes.
That’s the greatest proof, because even if you think I’m full of shit and you can’t learn anything from me, all you have to do is apply what’s in “How To Be A 3% Man,” and you’re going to see that it works. The book sells itself. That’s the beauty of truth. When you give it away, it sells itself. It should also make you question all of these other people that supposedly teach this stuff. If their material was so great, why aren’t they giving it away? That’s something to think about.
Low and behold I stopped, and the consequences came. I write this today as this relationship has ended, and I have gotten back to your teachings, a mistake many of us have made and ironically one that you’ve made a video about.
I’ve actually made countless videos about the topic, but people still don’t listen. A coach teaches fundamentals and he goes over it every practice, every coaching session, in every interaction he has with his clients, the people he’s coaching or his students, because everybody learns at a different pace. Some people are better at certain things than others.
Everybody knows a certain amount, a percentage of this stuff that they need to be successful. The goal is to fill in your knowledge gaps and then get to the point where you’re living this stuff and you understand the mindset — you’re not just trying to cherry pick, and if “A” happens, I’ll do “B.” You’re not going to get sustainable long-term success with that. This guy found out the hard way. Either way, he’s learning because of the pain he’s experiencing now.
But I suppose a lesson learned without blood is soon forgotten. I have had it hard this past month, unlike anything I have ever experienced, crying every night, with genuine pain going through my heart, but am fighting it and know that I will come out a better man at the end, because I can see the improvement even now.
I will be positive whenever speaking of this experience, but in this message I want to tell you the truth. And I simply want to thank you for helping me get back on track.
I am a college student and live far away where the average monthly salary is $350 roughly. Since whenever I hear you utter the words “donate how much you think this information was worth to you” I can’t think of a number, as it is unmatched compared to the info, but I would at least like to buy you some coffee with this donation, one that you can sip on while you’re reading this message and enjoying your life.
Hopefully things settle down with this whole Corona situation at the moment, as this is making things even harder on top of all. Wishing you all the best, stay safe at this time!
Thank you for the donation. I’m sorry that you’re going through this, but as the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. Now you’re drinking, and it’s a little too late, but you’re still young dude. You’re in college. You have your whole life.
When I was your age, I had no clue about this stuff, and look at you. You’ve had a three and a half year relationship as a result, so you’re further ahead at your age than when I was your age. Just imagine where you’ll be at fifty dude... as long as you keep applying the fundamentals.
Second Viewer’s Email:
You really don’t need the validation, but for those guys out there who doubt whether this stuff works or is really what a woman wants – YES, at least the well-adjusted women want this. There may be some domineering women who have issues, but you wouldn’t want them anyway.
The idea is, this book, “How To Be A 3% Man,” is going to help you get a good quality woman. Because if you’ve got a chick that’s a fruit loop and a lunatic, she’s probably not going to react too well to you behaving this way. It’ll bring out the insecurities really fast, and the worst women up front. And that’s what you want. You want to find out right way if you’re dealing with a lunatic, so you can kick her to the curb, instead of falling in love with her and trying to fix her. That shit just ain’t gonna work.
I am a single woman who has not taken care of herself as far as exercise and eating. I have struggled with that in recent relationships and given into weak men, because I thought that was the best I was going to get.
See, both men and women do this. If you don’t take care of yourself and you don’t think highly of yourself, why work out? Why eat healthy? Why hold out for a really good person to date or have a relationship with? Just take whatever shows up and settle. That’s what most people do. But I commend you for recognizing that you’ve been kind of settling for mediocrity and choosing to do something about it, because that’s what exceptional people do.
Exceptional people do something about their situation when they’re not satisfied about it. Mediocre people run their fucking mouths, and then they do nothing. There’s two types of people in this world. There’s doers, and there’s talkers, and we all have to decide which one we are going to be.
I ended up taking the alpha role because he abdicated it, and I didn’t stick around for long. I did not realize that this is what was happening, until I starting watching your videos a week ago. I am using the videos and book to bolster my perspective and to not blame myself when a relationship does not work out.
That’s what self-reliant people do. They say, “I must have done something wrong. I must have been giving off the wrong vibe to attract that crazy fucking person, that dishonest business partner, that client or that employee that ripped me off.”
I am also pulling up my big girl panties and getting into shape.
People who love and value themselves are going to take care of and appreciate their bodies, because at the end of the day, it’s the only place you have to live. But again, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. Most people just don’t fucking care. They’re content with just being on the conveyor belt to an early grave, which is sad and tragic, but that’s their choice.
I am the typical woman who will accidentally test a guy. Not doing it consciously or to “play games.” Before your videos, I would have been taken aback if a guy treated me the way you suggest. Now, I realize just how much I am yearning to be “handled” that way. I would actually be able to relax and be feminine, rather than having to be the masculine person I usually have to be.
Yeah, if you’re settling for weak guys, you’re probably settling for beta males that don’t have a clue what they’re doing. And that forces you into a masculine role, which is not your natural essence, and obviously you’re going to resent it.
It would be a revolution to be able to be my true feminine self, and I might need help to learn how to be that given I have been in the masculine role all of my life.
Keep doing what you are doing. Now we need a dating site where men are men, and the women want them to be that way.
Well, maybe there’s a business opportunity for you there.
Third Viewer’s Email:
How’s it going, Coach?
As I am writing this, I had been feeling really pissed off with friends and family. My sister, who is 22 and me being 18, had got into an argument over yours and Tony Robbins’ book which I own, “How To Be A 3% Man” and “Awaken the Giant Within.” She claims that these books I am reading could “brainwash me” to which I didn’t react to at first, but eventually I had it after any view I had different to her she would question me or be bitchy about it.
She’s trolling you. She’s testing you dude. And probably because you’re new to this stuff, you’re not 100% certain of it. Plus, she’s your older sister and she’s going to like to break your balls, because you’re her little brother. So like I talked about in the quote at the beginning of this, you always want to have a better, more playful comeback.
If you get upset, mad and pissed off at her, you want to have a different kind of attitude. Adopt a cockier type of attitude. Say some of the things I say like, “You’re just mad that I’m always right and you’re always wrong and the fact that I’m working to improve my life, and you’re just working to be mediocre. But it’s okay, because you’ll still be my big sis and I’ll love you, even when I’m rich and famous and I have a hot wife. I’ll still love you, and I’ll still invite you over.” You want to have fun with her, be playful and not let her get under your skin, mess with her, and flip it around.
She’s trolling you and causing you to lose your center, and you’re falling for it. That’s the wrong vibe. You want to have this vibe with your sister, with the girls you work with, the girls you go to school with, the women you’re going to meet in your career or whatever you do for a job. You want to practice it with everybody.
Practice thinking of something funny to say as a comeback to show that you’re not bothered. And on top of the fact that you’re not bothered, you use a comeback and some kind of humor to break her balls a little bit. Flip it around on her. “You’re just jealous because I got all the good looks in the family, and I’m more handsome as a man than you are pretty as a woman. And I can understand you being jealous like that,” or “You’re just jealous that mom and dad treated me better because they like me more than you.” Things like that. And say it with a smile on your face.
It’s BS, it’s nonsense, it’s ridiculousness, but that’s the fucking whole point. Playful and fun — that’s the way you always want to be. Nothing gets under your skin. “I’m smarter than you, I’m better than you” in a playful but not arrogant way — maybe a little cocky and humorous.
As the older sibling, she has been the one that’s always right and I’m wrong.
Like I said, you’ve got to flip that around. “Well, I’m the younger one, and obviously mom and dad like me better, because they made all the mistakes with you, and they got it right with me. You’re just jealous, because I’m better.”
The smallest things I do different to her, triggers her like a laser sensor.
Obviously, she’s insecure. Bust her on that. Tease her on that. “You’re just jealous because I’m going to make something of myself. But I’ll coach ya babe. We’re family. I’ll take care of you. You can come over and wash my car one day when I’m rich and famous.”
In the end, my parents got involved and stood up for me saying, “It’s good he’s choosing to learn things on his own.” To this day, she refuses to agree with anything I say.
There are some people who like to disagree just for the sake of disagreeing. But like I said, in this case she’s breaking your balls, because she’s able to get under your skin. And women don’t like weakness. That’s why they become bitchy. She’s becoming bitchy, because you’re acting like a bitch. So don’t act like a bitch.
How do I cope with a sibling who always puts me in the wrong?
Flip the script. Put her in the wrong in a playful way. Bust her about something. You’re just sitting there taking it. She’s smacking you all around. She’s trying to help you grow and become a man. Naturally, this is just what women do. But you’re not handling it appropriately.
I acknowledge what she has to say and sometimes agree, but I have read your book 12+ times and am certain that your material is not bullshit. After having a heartbreak from a crush, I found your work, (1.5 years ago).
Final point, what really are friends? I am going to become a successful songwriter in the future, and everyone tells me how hard it is to be one.
It’s true. It’s long, and it’s hard, and it doesn’t work out for most people. And it’s interesting that you mention that, because yesterday I was watching a clip of Bob Dylan. The song was pretty good, but I was listening to his voice and… everybody knows who Bob Dylan is, and he’s not known for having a great voice. He’s known for being a great musician.
So, just because your voice sucks doesn’t mean you can’t sing and be rich and famous. And anybody that says differently, all you’ve got to do its say, “Look at Bob Dylan.” Look at all of the people in the bands that you’ve listened to over the years, and you’re like, “That guy can’t sing, but that’s a good fucking song.” Your love of music, your obsession with being a great musician is what’s going to carry you there.
Being eighteen years old, you’re always going to have naysayers. Your whole life you’re always going to have people, even people close to you, going, “I don’t think you can pull it off.” You’ve got to remember, they’re giving you their story, not yours.
I don’t care. I will become one whatever it takes. I just want to have a group of friends that like me for me and not just after I’m successful.
That’s why it’s really helpful to make those kinds of friends when you’re not successful. Then, if you’re broke as a joke and people still want to hang out with you, it’s because they want to hang out with YOU, not because of your stuff.
Thanks for reading. I’m dropping a donation for helping me so much through difficult times.
Donations are always appreciated. There’s a donate button on the bottom of my website on any page, if you’re so inclined.
Fourth Viewer’s Email:
I don’t have a question, but I do have an overdue thank you! I was fortunate enough to have gotten my heart broken at 19 years old, which lead me to stumbling upon your work. Needless to say, I went down a rabbit hole of consuming your YouTube content and “How to Be A 3% Man” that inevitably changed my life.
At the time, I was a freshman in college. The year was a tough transition and I had not been applying myself as much as I should have been – I was wasting my money. Regardless, I fell into my first meaningful relationship despite my wild freshman antics.
I had been indulging my bad habits, making reckless choices, and almost getting myself kicked out of school. The final straw came when the girl I fell in love with broke things off with me a couple months after the school year ended. To my luck, I felt something in my gut tell me our relationship was teetering on the edge weeks prior to the break. Thus, I delved into the internet for answers as any confused person would. That’s when I saw your handsome face come across my searches for clarity. Even though it wasn’t enough to save the relationship at the time, I found the whole predicament a blessing in disguise.
After obsessively reading your book and listening to every YouTube video, I took immediate action. In the same week as the breakup, I began MMA classes and took more shifts at work to stay productive.
So you’re getting focused on your mission and purpose in life. And if you’re kind of struggling with your mission and purpose in life and figuring out what you want to do, read my second book “Mastering Yourself.” It’s also available to read for free in the members area at UnderstandingRelationships.com. All you’ve got to do is subscribe to the email newsletter.
When my sophomore year was about to start, I took what you taught and began planning accordingly. I told myself that I was going to manifest my own success and create my own luck. I was so scared of being worthless. But I adhered to your advice and stared at my fears, bulldozing right over them. This was 3 years ago.
Now, I am near the end of my college career, and I have accomplished everything I had planned to do. I became my fraternity’s chapter president, (yes, a short Asian kid convinced a group of white guys to pick me as their leader – I love it).
Well, you guys are usually the smartest guys in the room anyway. You’re an obvious choice bro.
While serving for my fraternity, I was able to make our chapter the best in the nation (seriously) and the first Greek Organization in our university history to be recognized as Student Organization of the Year.
Dude, you’ve been balling out in college.
Moreover, I became popular on campus, landed the best job a student could dream of, received the highest student leadership awards (Fraternity Man of the Year, Outstanding Leadership, and University Best) and most importantly, got the girl back.
Dude, nice job.
SIDENOTE: She reappeared into my life just a month after no-contact. I followed your guidance by just having fun and hooking up, expecting nothing out of her and letting her come to me at her own pace.
It’s really important when you’re in that situation, you’re trying to get an ex back, that the relationship is feminine energy. In other words, the commitment, bonding, connecting, relationship labels, dating labels, that’s all feminine energy, in the woman’s department. As a man, your job is simply to create the next opportunity for sex to happen — to hang out, to have fun and to hook up. Focus on that.
If you’re focused on the relationship, getting back together and fixing things, it’s not going to work out. If you’ve been dumped and blown off, the woman has to earn another chance with you. That’s why it’s up to her to call and text you first when you’re in a situation where you’re trying to get an ex back.
If she dumped you, if it was her idea to end it, it’s got to be her idea to fix it and rekindle it. That’s why you let her come back to you at her own pace. And that usually happens because you over-pursued or you didn’t communicate with her properly so she felt heard and understood.
What do you know? After 6-8 weeks of keeping things simple she said, “I can’t believe I love you more than I ever thought I could.”
That statement is so not surprising to me at this point in my life. When I was younger, I had a girlfriend that said that to me after she said “I never thought my feelings would go anywhere beyond just platonic friendship for you.” I just smiled. I knew it would happen eventually once I got it right, and now it’s so sweet to hear those kinds of things and to see people from all over the world having their girl say the same shit to them. And so, I’m not surprised. It’s the way it’s supposed to be. It’s inevitability.
To this day, I can’t help but smirk at how well your guidance has turned my love life into clockwork and a positive experience.
Dude, I envy you. I wish I had those kinds of experiences in college, but I’ve had lots of great times since. And you’ll continue to have them as well, so good for you.
To continue… she stuck with me throughout my journey of success, and I wouldn’t have been able to do it without your knowledge. I’m 23 now, and I continue to strive for excellence. I’ve recently negotiated my own terms for a real estate investing internship that pays well above average, and my future prospects are looking bright even throughout this pandemic.
If you want to learn how to negotiate and things of that nature in the real world of career, you’re definitely going to need to read my book “Mastering Yourself,” because I go into extensive detail about how I use those strategies to maximize my income earning potential in working for other people and later in myself.
And although I have much to learn and accomplish, I am grateful to have found your work as early as I had. I am now turning into a new chapter of my life, but I look at the uncertainty with confidence, abundance, and excitement. If it weren’t for the clarity you provided to me when I was 19, I wouldn’t know where I would be now.
When I gain a stronger financial holding, I will be sure to be a paying client and return my appreciation.
Thanks for the great success story, and welcome to the 3% club man.
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
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From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Humor, playfulness and not taking yourself too seriously are the hallmarks of happy people who accomplish their grandest goals and dreams. Optimistic people simply accomplish more than average people due to their positive attitude and expectation that things always are, and eventually will, work out in their favor. Optimistic people never focus on their current circumstances as a permanent reality, but simply maintain a laser like focus on taking action and looking for better ways to do things to accomplish their goals in the shortest time and most efficient way possible. Winners see things as they could be and eventually make it happen. Losers convince themselves that success is hopeless and impossible, and therefore, their actions match their beliefs.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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