What you should do if you have been hanging out with your ex for the past six months or more, but every time you go on dates with her and try to kiss her, all you get is her cheek, hugs and her telling you that you are friends only.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who got dumped by his ex six months ago due to his weak and needy behavior. He says he thinks that he made the mistake, when they broke up, of agreeing to be friends. For the past six months, he has been pursuing and asking her out on dates. She agrees to go out on dates sometimes, but when he tries to kiss her at the end of their dates, he only gets her cheek, gets a hug in return and gets admonished by her reminding him that they are only friends. He asks me if he is doing anything wrong with her…lol. He wants to know what he can do to get out of friends zone without burning a bridge.
Thanks a lot for the work you are doing to help men be more successful in life! I have got a question on getting my ex back.
Long story short, she dumped me six months ago after being in a close relationship for about two and a half years. As I read your book twice, I saw all of the mistakes I’d done because of my needy and weak behavior. (If you’re still hanging out with a woman who friend-zoned you six months ago, you’re still acting needy and weak. This is approval-seeking behavior.) I wish I had known the material before this break-up occurred. She was having a working vacation in Europe when she dumped me. I did my best to respectfully accept her position, but I think I fucked up by agreeing to stay friends. (You should have told her you weren’t interested in being platonic friends.) After she came back, I reached out and suggested to have a cup of coffee. (You don’t chase after somebody who dumps you.) During the date I felt no interest from her side. I drove her home and tried to kiss her, but got rejected and received the “we are friends” speech from her. (She’s being the man in the relationship.) I started dating another girl, but two months later I realized I still had strong feelings for my ex. When she reached out, I arranged a date, but that, too, led to nothing.
Two weeks later, in February, we had another date, but I still got nothing but hugs. Every two weeks, I appointed dates, trying to seduce her and appear as a man she’d be into, (The problem is, you’re still pursuing her. When you keep calling her, that communicates you accept her terms of friendship), and the past three times she didn’t agree to meet, saying she planned to hang out with her girlfriends. (Now you’re continuing to call her and she won’t even make plans with you. Have some self-respect dude.)
Am I doing something wrong with this girl? (You have read my book twice, and you haven’t changed your behavior at all. You are doing the exact opposite of everything I teach.) Is there any way to tell her I’m not okay with being friends, without burning bridges? (If you keep taking this same failed approach, she will find someone else.) Any advice? (Never ever call or text this woman again. If she reaches out, she needs to come to make dinner at your place, as I discuss in my article and video, “7 Principles To Get An Ex Back.” You don’t want to be her gay male girlfriend.) I know she’s not dating now. Is that a good sign for me? (Come on man! The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.)
I would appreciate your help.
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“When a man gets dumped by his girlfriend, lover or his wife, and he agrees to be friends only in hopes that someday he will get another shot at dating her, this is the pinnacle of dating self-delusion. The very act of a man agreeing to be platonic friends when he wants to remain romantic lovers is an insult to his manhood. Men who do this are knowingly and unknowingly surrendering their man-cards and committing self-neutering. A real man walks away and never looks back when a woman unilaterally changes the terms of their romantic relationship into a platonic one. Why? Because a real man has enough self-love, self-respect and dignity to know that it is simply a matter of time before he meets and replaces her with someone better.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne