Successful 1st Date: Women Help You When They Like You

The hidden signals women give off to help you to seduce them.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who shares a story of a successful 1^st date he just had with a woman he met on Tinder. He was originally skeptical because she’s 39 and he’s 31, but she was way hotter in person than her dating profile pictures. Later that evening after their date ended, she asked to see him again and offered her availability.

My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter and the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “Successful 1st Date: Women Help You When They Like You”.

So I’ve got an email. It’s kind of a little success story. A guy went on a first date. I think he’s kind of new to my work. He’s 31 and this particular girl is 39. And he said he was originally kind of skeptical because he’s like, yeah, she’s eight years older.

He says, however, when they met in person, “she was really much better looking in person than her pictures.” So they had a really good date. Conversation went well, and she even told them about some of the other guys that she goes out with and how they basically blow up her phone and chase her away.

And after the date ended, she said she had a good time and asked to see him again. So if you’re doing something right, if you go out on a first date and the girl is excited and it brings up because most women will not brings up seeing you again.

Viewer Email:

Hi Coach Corey Wayne,

Hope you are doing well, and thank you for all that you do. I matched with a woman on Tinder. I am 31 and she is 39, and we share a lot of mutual interests. We are both into fitness, martial arts, sauna, traveling, and generally living an active lifestyle. We exchanged only a couple of messages briefly, and she actually suggested meeting up, which of course I went along with.

So that’s a sign of a woman who really likes you. She really wants to see you. You definitely passed her physical attraction test. She doesn’t need to chit chat too long. She’s like, let’s get together. So that’s a good sign. That’s a sign of high interest. A 7 or 8 on a scale of 1 to 10, according to the book.

She suggested going for a drink and something to eat, which I agreed to, and then I suggested mini golf afterwards, which she also agreed to.

So she’s pretty flexible. It’s nice, you see, there’s no resistance because more often than not, we’re doing these emails. It’s usually something where it just everything went sideways. And here this is what it looks like when it’s effortless. So everything just flows together. It’s like Adam Carolla says, “When a woman likes you, the door is open and all you’ve got to do is walk through.” In other words, you’ve just got to not talk him out of liking you. Which is what unfortunately, most of us that don’t know any better do more often than not.

The day before the date, I read and listened to the first date chapter in your book around five times, and on the day of the date I did the same again twice.

So this guy was taking it seriously.

It felt like it was programmed into my brain, especially the do’s and don’ts on a first date.

You may hear a fan going, it’s kind of hot. Just got out of the shower. It’s just like a fucking swamp down here. It’s like in the high 80s. There’s really no breeze. You walk outside, it’s just ugh. You go five feet out the door and it’s just. You’ve got mist on your brow already.

I was a little apprehensive initially because she is 8 years older than me, and usually I date younger women. However, this proved to be absolutely no issue whatsoever. When I first met her, I genuinely thought: “Holy fuck… she is smoking hot.” She looked even better than her Tinder pictures and was completely my type — small, petite, outdoorsy, feminine, fit, and active. She was basically everything I had written down on my list.

So he’s obviously talking about the list exercise from the book, which he did.

She honestly took my breath away, but as you say coach, I did not put her on a pedestal and simply treated her like anybody else.

Well, she’s on probation too.

We had drinks and some food, and she probably did around 80% of the talking. I asked good quality questions, listened carefully, probed deeper into things she mentioned, and referenced topics she had already spoken about.

So he’s kind of weaving the conversation around the things that she’s excited and interested in, because you want to ask the kind of questions that other people in this case, obviously a woman you’re trying to date enjoys answering. And then you talk about other things, especially if it’s a topic she’s really excited about. It makes it easy to have fun things to talk about. And she likes that you like listening to her talk about something that she likes. This is just natural human rapport for especially if you guys are in sales, you understand what I’m talking about.

She also asked me some good questions back. I kept my answers playful, relaxed, and a little mysterious at times. We then headed to mini golf. Early on she actually scored a hole in one, and I gave her a high five to initiate some physical contact. At one point I had a bottle of water and she asked if she could drink from it, which immediately made me think she would likely be comfortable kissing later on.

Yeah, women help you when they like you. They want to get close to you. They want your backwash. They want your backwash from your water or your beer or your cocktail. Even during mini golf.

During mini golf she also occasionally bumped into me and was very comfortable physically.

Well, when a woman likes you, that’s what she does. She starts touching you. That basically means touching is invited and okay, so you slowly reciprocate and escalate from there as the book says.

At the end of the date we hugged, and then I kissed her. We ended up kissing for a while and she told me I was a great kisser.

Well, it’s always a bonus. Good job in the kissy poo. It’s always nice when a woman compliments you on that.

Later that evening she text me saying she had a really good time and wanted to see me again. She even suggested a day herself.

So that’s high interest, like I said. I put it as 7 or 8 on a scale of 1 to 10. So most of the time your dates are not going to be as excited. But when it happens like this, it’s like, man, it’s so nice. It’s so easy, especially when you’ve had a bunch of duds or dates that didn’t go anywhere, or girls that are kind of being difficult and you get somebody like this, it’s like, Holy shit, what a fresh breath of fresh air.

She has already told me she is very much an “in person” kind of woman and does not enjoy endless texting throughout the day, which honestly was music to my ears.

It’s also her way of saying, hey, I like guys that are direct and to the point. I don’t want to send 100 memes back and forth before you ask me out on a date. Just make it happen.

She also mentioned previous dates with older men who constantly blew up her phone and acted needy and insecure when they were apart from her. Almost suggesting to me please don’t be like these guys.

This is what women do to help you when they like you. So she’s basically giving you feedback. Well, here’s what most of the guys do that I’m meeting, even though they’re supposedly older and supposed to have their shit together. They’re turning me off, acting insecure, acting needy. It also could be taken as a compliment that you’re not really displaying that kind of vibe.

I do not know where things will go from here, but I plan on sticking to the principles in the book and continuing to move at her pace. Hangout, have fun and hookup. 

Well, in this case, she’s mentioning, I think it was even on the same night, what a good time she had. And let’s see here. Let me make sure about that. Yeah. So later that evening. So normally, you know, a woman’s going to say, hey, I had a great time, you know, have a great night, whatever. But in this case, she’s like, hey, I had a really great time. I’d like to see you again. So in that case, she’s bringing it up.

You’re gonna definitely make the next date, especially this way she’s asking for the day so you can move at her pace. And so because her interest is super high, she’s ready to see you again, which makes it really nice. So things move along quicker. So in this case you’re going to go at her pace like always. But since she’s highly interested, you’ll be able to get together again sooner than most of the women that you’re going to go out with. So it’s really fun when you get a girl that’s really into you. Like this makes it so easy.

I do not know where things will go from here, but I plan on sticking to the principles in the book and continuing to move at her pace. Hangout, have fun and hookup. 

Obviously, in that order, the hookup comes at the end of the date. Don’t try to put it at the beginning unless you’ve been hooking up for a while. I had an email that I did the other day, I think it was yesterday, one of yesterday’s emails, where a lot of guys do this, they’re like almost hooking up. And so they set the next date, and then they just try to invite the girl straight to their house because they think, hey, we’ll just pick up right where we left off last time.

And then this time we’ll definitely hook up. But you’ve got to take the girl through the process, hang out, have fun, hook up. The hookup is at the end of the date. Each date is its own microcosm. You’ve got to live in the moment, because you get sloppy. And that particular guy did. And then he fumbled the football.

Overall, this was one of the best first dates I have ever had. One of the biggest lessons I have learned from your work is that it is not about doing everything perfectly 100% of the time, it is about consistently doing more things right than wrong, learning from mistakes, and asking yourself:
 “Will this increase attraction or decrease attraction?”

Yeah. Should I have this extra shot of Jack Daniels? Should I have a double of Jack Daniels, or should I do what Corey said and stick with the Miller Lite or the Keystone Lite at the beach? Something like that. Something watered down. So telling her all my problems, is that going to make me look more attractive and desirable or less attractive? The fact that I just lost my job. I got evicted from my place. I’m sleeping in my car. I mean, I’m being facetious, obviously.

I mean, some guys, that’s the situation. But if it’s not positive, if it’s not upbeat, if it’s not uplifting, if it doesn’t make you look as he says, will this increase attraction or decrease it, then keep it to yourself or your therapist or your close guy friends. Anybody you’re going to tell things that make you look weak, make sure there’s no way it’s going to get back to her.

And as the old Indian proverb goes, “if tribe not to know, keep your mouth shut.” Operational security is important. So nice job on the first date there. That’s pretty much textbook went well. And remember, most women are going to sleep with a guy by his second or third date. So I would imagine date 2 or 3, he should get the gold medal. Hopefully he’ll send us another email. Let us know how it goes.

This stuff is gold. Coach, thank you again for all the amazing content and advice. Keep up the great work.

Well again, thanks for the success story. If you got an email or a challenge you’d like to send in for a Video Newsletter consideration [email protected]. That’s Questions with an s and Understanding Relationships with an S .com or if you’ve got a success story you want to share, send it on in. And just like this guy did.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly.

If you haven’t already signed up for my Exclusive Premium Members Only Content in the video description is video, there are links to join on YouTube, or you can join on Spotify or our Website UnderstandingRelationships.com. Just click the “plans” tab when you get there. And the good news is with my Website, you can do a seven day free trial to check out all the great content and extensive library of additional content that you get for being a Premium Member.

And if you choose an annual plan, you can get a 25% discount at the end of the seven day free trial. So go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the “plans” tab, sign up for a seven day free trial for a Premium Membership. And until next time, I will talk to you soon.