Why being successful with women is mostly an inner transformation in how you view yourself, and why focusing on being a balanced, centered and successful man is the key to reaching your full potential in your personal and professional life.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who shares an amazing success story of how my work, personal one-on-one coaching and getting focused on becoming a balanced, centered and successful man has saved his marriage, turned his life around and helped him to regain his passion and excitement for life.
I first started working with him eighteen months ago when his marriage was on the rocks, and he was not in a very happy place. He got a new job doing what he loves, and the best part about his new job? He plans to eventually become a coach, trainer, speaker and author, and his new job enables him to perfect his skills, teach what he wants and develop his talent, so when he finally makes the transition to being an entrepreneur, it can be seamless, effortless and successful. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
Hopefully this email finds you doing awesome! I just wanted to fire off a quick update on all the success I have been experiencing since I started to practice your work. We had a coaching session about 18 months ago. During that time, you challenged me to be better and to rise to the level of advice you were giving. I did just that, and wow… it really paid off. At the time, everything was going poorly, my marriage, job, career, lack of mission, etc. Since then, everything has turned around. (When people first discover my work, what they learn when they get into it is, it’s not about a pickup line, what you say or what you do. It’s really about your inner, personal transformation. It’s about becoming a person of value who has a goal, a mission and a purpose in life. It’s about knowing what you want, and most importantly, why you want it. Without those emotionally compelling reasons for wanting something, when you run into obstacles, you’ll quit and give up, and you’ll never get close to reaching your full potential. And this is what most people will experience. As I discuss in my book, “How To Be A 3% Man,” 3% of the world’s men and women have found success because they had a plan, and they practiced and rehearsed it over and over until they became really proficient at it.)
First of all, I now feel amazing about life and where I am going. I followed your advice and redefined my mission and purpose. It has caused me to reignite as a man, and my excitement and passion for life returned. (That is because you focused on your mission and purpose in life, what was compelling to you.) Not only was I able to secure a job building a leadership development program for a global pharmaceutical company, flying all over the country and Europe teaching/speaking/coaching/etc., but I am also in the process of launching my own company, writing a book/speaking/teaching/coaching/etc. (You should follow my business model. If you are interested in hiring a ghost writer, check out Guru.com. Make an outline of what you want to discuss in your book, have the ghost writer record the conversation, give them the outline and let them write the book.) I consider this business as my contribution to the world, and it has me totally jacked. (If you’re going to be successful at anything, you have to consider, it’s going to take you a decade to be where you want to be.) The cool thing is that what I do in the workplace is allowing me to test drive much of what I want to do in my business, as I have almost complete control of the content I develop and teach, therefore, I have the best of both worlds. (You can refine your business and what you want to do while you work for someone else. That way, you can learn from their mistakes instead of on your own dime.)
My marriage did a 180. It was a wreck, because I was not showing up as a man. My wife, who is a total hottie and gets hit on all the time, is back in her feminine energy since I have returned to my masculine. Our relationship is great, and it has flowed over to our kids, (That’s awesome, because now your kids have something successful to emulate), as my relationship with them has become amazing, and we do more and more as a family. (You’re a great dad for doing that.) My workouts and daily self-development activities have also become fun and impactful again, and my social life has also exploded. (The happier you are, the more likely you’ll take care of your body.) The most amazing thing is that I now get tons of attention from the ladies. When my marriage was going under, I tried to get it, but it never worked. Now, they come to me, even though I am married, and the women whose attention I was trying to get, while things were on the rocks with my wife, are now chasing me — a whole new set of challenges, LOL. (Dude, don’t fuck around on your wife. Be faithful. It’s not honorable to cheat. Remember, your kids will emulate everything you do.) The bottom line is that it didn’t have anything to do with what was going on outside of me, and had everything to do with what was going on inside of me. (It’s all inner game.) Once I rediscovered my purpose, gained my emotional center, and put 100% commitment into getting myself fixed, everything else fell into place. I could go on and on, as there are numerous topics you teach that I applied/still apply, which make all the difference.
I know that you state you have to read your book 10 – 15 times. I don’t think that is enough. (Like I say, the best success stories come from guys who have read the book 10-15 times.) For me, I have tried to become a student of your work. That means reading and re-reading your book. I’m on my second copy, because I wore the first one out. (You did it. You immersed yourself, and now you’re reaping the rewards.) It also means to not only watch your videos, but to take notes, and then go back and study those notes to the point where I am able to pull off the information automatically, trying to hit unconscious competence. (You’ve definitely been paying attention.) This is what I believe has helped me more than anything, so you are right on about repetition, but I don’t need to tell you that. (Like Tony Robbins says, “Repetition is the mother of skill.”)At any rate, I can never thank you enough for all the wisdom, counsel and information you provide. It has changed my life for the better, and I am very grateful! If I can ever be of help in any way, please don’t hesitate to contact me. (The best compliment you can give me is to tell everyone you know.) Many, many, many thanks. You helped me find the life I always wanted, and things just keep getting better. Keep killing it! (Thanks for the great success story. You’re a leader. By transforming yourself, every time somebody hears you speak, you’ll be transforming the lives of others.)
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:
From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Being successful in your romantic and professional life is mostly the result of an inner transformation. By becoming focused on creating an emotionally compelling vision for your life, with equally emotionally compelling goals, you become focused on your life purpose and mission like a laser beam. What you focus on in life will expand. When you focus on becoming great at something you love for a living, your life takes on meaning, purpose and value. When you feel like you are striving to become, and are in the process of becoming, what you were put on this earth to do, you will feel like you have a great reason for living and playing full out. This makes you happy and causes others to notice your happiness and satisfaction with life. The most attractive people are people who have come alive on the inside with a burning desire to be what they can be. In a world where most people major in minor things and settle for a life that is less than what they are capable of living, this makes you stand out as a precious, rare and valuable person. Everyone loves a winner, not a whiner.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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