The More You Talk About Sex, The Less Sex You Will Get

Why you shouldn’t talk about sex but escalate physically when she’s attracted & turned on.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who has read 3% Man, 10 times, but doesn’t appear to have practiced it very much. He’s been seeing a girl recently that things got hot and heavy with. However, he’s falling into the trap of talking about sex and having sex with her on the phone and text, but no longer focused on creating opportunities for sex to happen in person. She said she doesn’t feel a connection with him and now he’s worried about seeking her approval instead of letting her come to him and seducing her in person when the signs are there. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne, and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Members Only Newsletter is, “The More You Talk About Sex, The Less Sex You Will Get.”

Well, I’ve got an email from a guy, who, he’s young, he’s read The Book. He says he’s listened to 3% Man about ten times. And so he’s been seeing this girl. And they’ve almost, or come close to having sex. And they’re doing a lot of talking about it. And because he’s young and he’s inexperienced, it doesn’t look like he’s practiced The Book a lot. And so this girl is really hot and he’s really into her. And it’s just he’s having a hard time exercising self-control.

And he’s starting to stray from The Book already. And this is one of the ways that women like to tease and build sexual tension. And you got to know what the hell you’re doing and how women operate. It’s like if they can talk about sex a lot and entice you, but keep you on the phone and texting you doing this and Snapchatting and WhatsApping you and all this stuff, you’re going to notice that you’re going to be talking about it a lot, but the get togethers in person are going to become far and few between.

When you try to make a get together happen, which you’ll notice something will come up. She might start canceling get togethers on you. And so this guy is thinking, “we’re almost ready to have sex.” And so now they’re talking about it a lot in person. And mostly now it seems to be on the phone and through texting. And as I say in The Book, the phone is for setting dates, not getting to know somebody. And if you spend too much time talking about sex on the phone, you’re more than likely not going to actually be getting together in person to have sex.

Because guys, who get plenty of sex are not going to be sitting there chit chatting and talking about it and fantasizing about it. There are going to be direct, decisive. They’re going to get to the fucking point and they’re going to make a get together happen. Because they’re too busy to be on the phone all day. Maybe this guy’s young, maybe he’s in college, doesn’t have a lot going on in his life. And it’s actually your inaction and the fact that you’re not as hungry for it that really drives women wild, to the point where they’ll be grabbing your shirt and pulling on it and tearing your buttons out to pull your clothes off.

But when you do this, what ends up happening is over time, you know, and again, this is in The Book, and this guy’s been through it ten times, but he’s just getting totally blinded because he thinks because they’re talking about sex, that it’s just definitely going to happen. So it’s just a bad way to go. This is just something to kind of clean up your game. Again, a man’s job is to create an opportunity for sex to happen. That’s what dating is. Hang out, have fun, hook up. Doesn’t say talk on the phone about sex all the time and then never get together in person.

And then all of a sudden she’s just going to want to sleep with you. Because the other thing that she’s said to this particular guy is that, she doesn’t think they really have a connection. So when a woman throws that out there, but you’re talking about sex all the time, she’s going to probably be pretty hard to get together in person. She may make you think she’s going to get together in person, but when it actually comes time to get together in person, if you do what this guy is doing, there’s a good chance you’re not actually going to see her in person.

But then she’ll tell you how much she misses you and can’t wait to see you again, even though she won’t actually make plans with you. So this guy is really starting to stray from The Book. Again it’s kind of a rookie mistake. Shouldn’t be doing things like this. Your job is to be the appointment setter in the interaction. And it helps you remain mysterious when you use the phone for setting dates. But this guy is just, pfft. He’s treating her like a girlfriend. These things are okay when you’re in a relationship, but again. I’m not. Me personally.

I’m not going to sit on the phone all day talking and texting. It’s like, “Hey, are you coming over? You’re on your way. Let’s get together. Let’s do this. Let’s do that.” I am busy, and I don’t want to be on my fucking phone all day, banging away with my thumbs in these tiny little fucking buttons. I got better things to do with my life. So it’s like you’re either in or you’re out. You either want to get together or you don’t. And when you train women and people in your life that way from the beginning, talking and texting on the phone simply is to facilitate as quickly as possible arranging get togethers.

If a girl is mad that you don’t talk on the phone or you don’t text enough, you should be seeing her in person. If she complains about “Oh, you never talk. We never do this.” It’s like, “Well, I’m really busy, but I want to see you. I’m not a talker and I’m not a texter. I’d rather look in those beautiful eyes of yours and kiss those beautiful lips and hear that sweet voice of hers going in both my ears in person, not through a fucking phone.” So with that in mind, let’s go through his email.

Viewer Email:

Hi Corey,

I got your book, listened to it probably 10 times, and listening more. I’ve been seeing a girl, walked with her, hung out in the evening until 11, 12 for 5 nights, which were often cut short.

Probably by her.

Except for one night where we got hot n heavy- she was telling me she was excited, and giving me all sorts of signs and rubbing her pussy against me, and the next day she said she had no intentions of moving further that night.

This just sounds like a young guy. He’s inexperienced. He’s read The Book a bunch, but now this is like the first live girl. And she rubbed his pussy and it’s like rubbing a magic lantern. You know, Aladdin. It’s like, whoa, where’s the genie? Except when she rubs her pussy, it’s like, Boom! She kind of vanishes after that because you got excited. Too excited.

We hung out 2 times since then, but it was just a bit rocky (PMS, and short evenings, mixed signals).

So that tells me she’s got kind of low interest. And when a woman has low interest, they’re going to test the shit out of you. They’re going to dangle the pussy. And then something’s always going to come up. “Oh she’s pmsing. Oh, I gotta get up early in the morning.” If a girl’s cutting dates short, she’s not that into it.

And then if you make a dunce move and start talking and texting on the phone all the time, then you’re not going to be getting together very much in person, which is what looks like starting to happen here. Because this is how you get a really bad case of blue balls the size of watermelons.

We agreed after the second hangout.

We agreed. Yeah, right. She told you and you went, “Okay. Okay, mommy, I’ll do what you say.”

We agreed after the second hangout to wait a little bit to have sex and I jokingly said I haven’t held your hand or even felt your body warmth yet, and she keeps hinting since so I’m going to have sex with her soon.

Meanwhile, whenever they get together in person, she’s cutting the date short. She’s PMSing. It’s like, bro, you’re getting hypnotized. She’s selling you what’s called Blue Sky. She’s a salesman. She’s bullshitting you. And that’s all it takes to get you to go, “Oh my God, I’m going to get pussy. So this is so great.” You’re acting dopey. Don’t do it. The Book is only going to help you if you follow it. As soon as a girl rubs her pussy on you and you just fall apart, The Book’s not going to help you. Because you’ve just basically continued to revert back to having terrible game.

She’s coming over this weekend (works the next day can’t stay the night) and a day next week (can stay the night). 

So next week she’s definitely available. Well, it’ll be interesting to see if she actually comes over on the weekend like she says. And so now he’s talking about multiple get togethers in the next week. And usually when that happens, probably zero get togethers actually happen.

I’ll admit, and I’ve told her I want to be comfortable with her and get to know her before having sex.

Which that actually can work to your advantage.

But I feel like the clock is ticking and I’m going to have sex with her soon, I told her on the phone tonight.

Again, the phone is for setting dates, dude. This is how you talk and text women out of liking you. This is boring, Chad Thunder Cock is not wasting his fucking time doing this stupid amateur nonsense. He’s like, “Are you coming over?” He’s not sitting there going, “Oh, how was your day?” He’s not doing any of that. He’s just making the date happen. Because he’s busy because he got 3 or 4 other girls he’s banging. he ain’t got time for this. He’s like, “I can see you Thursday. That’s all I got open. Otherwise it’s going to be probably two weeks.”

I told her on the phone tonight. She said it’s a different approach to waiting to have sex.

See, the beta male agrees. “Oh, yeah. This makes sense. Okay, we’ll just wait. Yeah.”

This was her idea, so I was being respectful!

Dude, she’s selling you blue sky and you’re falling for it hook, line and sinker.

I want to have sex with her.

We know, dude. But if you keep doing this and ignoring what The Book says, you’re not going to be having sex with her.

I want to have sex with her, lots of sex, don’t get me wrong, she replies and chuckles “yea”.

Again. She’s just dangling it. You’re just totally hypnotized. She’s got you wrapped around her finger and she didn’t even have to give up any yet. Meanwhile, she’s getting her back blown out by Chad Thunder Cock. Who’s actually fucking her.

I feel like since I like her so much that I don’t want to move too quickly otherwise she’d back off and it just makes me nervous to think if it didn’t go smoothly because I would have to change from being a nice guy to invading her downstairs, weird how I think that.

What? Maybe this guy’s a virgin.

I also get nervous around someone new. With my last girlfriend’s I would have sex with them fluently even with a condom.

It’s kind of sound like he’s trying to bullshit me. Does this guy sound like he’s experienced with women? Or does he sound like somebody who’s trying to lose his virginity? Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m being too harsh, but just the way he talks about it. “Oh, yeah, Coach. I’m successful. Oh, yeah. I get lots of girls.” You don’t need to puff yourself up. Besides, when I see you doing things like this that are clearly the opposite of what The Book teaches, and you’re like, “Oh, yeah, I get laid all the time. Oh, yeah. Lots of girlfriends, lots of pussy.” I go, yeah, you kind of sound like you’re bullshitting me.

How do I really feel comfortable around this woman that I like so much?

Let her come to you. Stop talking and texting on the phone so much. Just make dates in the evening that can lead to sex. Pretty simple. Follow what The Book says, and you’re clearly not doing that at all. And then you’re scratching your head, going, “How do I feel comfortable?” The reason you feel uncomfortable is because you’re not in your masculine and you’re acting like a girl. And so therefore you’re being soft, you’re being weak and you’re being unattractive, and you can feel that. You can feel that she’s talking a lot about what you guys are going to do, but there’s actually talking and no doing happening.

She also says she doesn’t feel a connection.

So you’re like, “Oh, sex is going to happen real soon.” But she says she doesn’t feel a connection. If she doesn’t feel a connection, she likes your attention. Meanwhile, she’s getting her back blown out by Chad Thunder Cock.

So how do I become more interesting and fun to be around her instead of being nervous.

Stop talking on the phone all the time and stop texting on the phone. Follow what The Book teaches. It’s laid out very clearly. You claim you read it ten times, but when I look at what you’re actually doing, you’re doing the opposite of what The Book teaches. So you know, based on this, it doesn’t look like you’re going to get laid at all. You’re just giving your attention and validation. She’s giving you what we call the Kentucky guarantee.

And when push comes to shove, something’s going to come up at the last minute. And she’s going to be, “Oh, darn it, I really wanted to see you, but I just got to get up early or I have a headache or oh, I’m really PMSing or I’m on my period right now and I got bad cramps and like, my head hurts. I kind of got a cold. I don’t want to be around you. I don’t want to give it to you.” That’s what’ll happen.

Instead of being nervous that I’ll say something to offend her.

Does this really sound like a dude that’s got lots of experience with women? “Oh, yeah. My girlfriends and I, we had sex all the time.” Doesn’t sound like it. Don’t bullshit the Coach.

And keep make her back off? We’re going to Tofino next week.

Is that a place? I don’t know if it’s a misspelling because he didn’t capitalize it. T o f I n o. Is that a city somewhere? You guys can let me know in the comments.

Next week and back to my place for the night and shell likely come over on the weekend.

Sure she will.

Got a lot in common, both workout, similar diets, do adventurous things, kind people, similar beliefs.  How do I not be so boring around her?

Bob

Shut your fucking mouth. How about that? Shut your mouth and ask questions. Ask her the kind of questions she would enjoy answering. But the problem is, is you’re talking and texting on the phone so much, and you’re shooting your whole wad and you’re telling her everything about you. There’s no mystery. And what you’re going to find out is that something’s just going to come up, and she’s not going to be able to make it. That’s what typically happens. Maybe not. Maybe she really is super into you.

But when I look at the way you talk and the way you act, I see lots of talking, but very little doing. The phone is for setting dates, not getting to know someone, and you’re violating a cardinal rule. And then when you get together, she’s like, “Oh, we’re going to wait.” If she was turned on and her pussy was dripping wet, she would have already given it up, Bro. If you’d been following what’s in The Book, she would have already given it up. So you got to clean up your game and actually follow what The Book teaches instead of reading it and then going, hey, it’s a Frisbee now.

And you go throwing it out the window and do the opposite. You’re acting like every beta male that you see in the movies. So this is a bad way to go, my man. The phone is for setting dates. This is so easy. If she reaches out assume she wants to see you. Make a date, then get off the phone. The problem is, you’re talking all the time to her, and then you’re running out of stories. You’re running out of things to tell her about what’s going on in your life. And she’s getting bored, and everything is always in the future.

Oh, we’re going to get together next week, and the week after that. We’re going to get together then too. It looks like he hung out five days in a row with this girl till 11, 12:00 at night. Then now it looks like it’s been weeks since they got together. If you hang out five nights in a row and you don’t seal the deal, then that tells me when you were together in person, you were talking her out of liking you and sleeping with you. But she really enjoys the attention and validation that you’re giving her while she gets her back. Blown out by Mr. Chad and Bob Thunder Cock. Got to clean it up, dude. The Book’s not going to help you if you do the opposite of it.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.