Why your life will radically change for the better when you think, walk, talk and act like an alpha.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email success story from a twenty-seven year old male from Ireland. He originally found my work after getting dumped by his girlfriend, due to excessive drinking, weed smoking, drug taking and having no real direction in life. He shares how living this way made him fearful and eventually led to what he feared most to actually happen, losing his girlfriend.
He describes what his life is like now, only a few months later after implementing what I teach, and how his confidence with women has skyrocketed and awakened in him a desire to become the best version of himself. It’s another success story of how some subtle mindset changes and taking action can radically alter your life trajectory for the better. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
How are you? I wanted to write in about my amazing and continuously growing success story, and it is all thanks to your work.
(Well, I appreciate that, but you put in the effort. That’s the important thing, because without effort you don’t get any results. And without results, you don’t get better and you can’t learn from your mistakes.)
I know there are a lot of men and women out there that need to hear what your work offers.
I am a 27-year-old male from Ireland. I found your work after I got dumped by my girlfriend. Excessive drinking, weed smoking, drug taking and having no real direction in life had SLOWLY diminished my confidence, and I fell into your infamous Fear of Loss mentality.
(Anybody who is using excessive drinking, excessive week-smoking, drug-taking, watching too many movies, eating too much chocolate or junk food, you’re using it as an escape from life. It’s a way to justify being lazy and putting things off. There’s nothing wrong with having a little fun, but the idea is 80% of the time you want to be healthy, and 20% of the time you want to have your glass of wine, your bong hits for Jesus, your chocolate cake or whatever it happens to be.
Obviously, you had things inverted, where most of the time you were being a fuck-up and very rarely were you taking care of your body. That is out of whack and out of balance, and it’s going to be impossible to achieve your dreams if you’re living that way.)
Guess what mother fucking happened? Yep I lost her.
(So in other words, you feared losing your girl, you tried to force things to get her to stick around, and because you weren’t focused on your purpose and your mission in life, eventually she completely lost all attraction and decided to seek a guy who had his shit together.)
I ultimately was sick of relationships ending, (I’ve had 4 serious relationships at 27 years of age), and decided “You know what, fuck this. I’m going to apply these principles in Corey’s book and see what happens.”
(That’s the beauty of what I teach. Even if you think I’m full of fucking shit, if you apply the things I teach in my books, they will both work for you. That includes both books, “How To Be A 3% Man,” and “Mastering Yourself.”)
I read the book 10 times in 3 months, bringing me up to Christmas time. My dating skills had started to improve, but I was still missing my ex, as I had not met anyone I truly connected with. I also am still not at the place where I can approach any woman, anywhere, but I am improving day by day and am able to take opportunities when they present themselves.
Then came the new year. When 2018 hit, I decided to change my lifestyle for good, as my previous 27 years had not been working.
(This guy has a lot of success rituals, meaning day in and day out, these things happen no matter what. This is what it takes to be disciplined.)
Since 2018 began I have:
· Been doing daily meditation
· Hitting the gym at 6am every morning before work and I’m in incredible shape
· Quit heavy drinking
· Quit drugs
· Been journaling
(Journaling is a great thing to do. Write down your victories, write down the things you’ve learned, and write down the things you’re grateful for. Remember, your brain is going to give you more of whatever you focus on in life. If you take 5-10 minutes every day when you get up or when you go to bed at night just journaling about the great things that happened or whatever you’ve learned, whatever you focus on expands. So if you’re focusing and making a conscious effort to journal, you teach your brain to look for more things to be grateful for. As you notice more beauty, more beauty tends to show up. Whatever you focus on in life, you’re going to get more of, and journaling is a great way to do that.)
· Started reading and studying self-development heavily
(Jim Rohn said, “Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.” College is great and I needed that degree to get the job or earn the income I wanted, but the reality is, everything I learned after college, all of the stuff I taught myself about business, life, self development, relationships, everything I focused on, the best stuff I learned was outside of college. If you don’t continue to be a life-long learner, you’re going to get lapped by other people on the journey of life, because knowledge helps you become more efficient in how you apply your actions. The idea is, you want to work smarter, not harder.)
· Grown my removals business by 25%
· Been eating a clean alkaline diet
(Obviously you’ve read Dr. Robert O. Young’s books, “The pH Miracle” and “Sick and Tired?: Reclaim Your Inner Terrain.” Also the books by Dr. Steven R. Gundry, such as “Dr. Gundry’s Diet Evolution.” I talk about those in my book, “Mastering Yourself.”)
· Become a more confident man day by day
(What grows your confidence? Confidence comes from doing what you know how to do, and doing it really well. The only way to learn how to do something really well is by practicing that. Everybody starts out at everything as a total novice and a total beginner. You have to learn and practice. You have to spend thousands of hours to really master something. But the more you practice it, the less you’ll feel the fear, and the easier it’s going to get.)
Changing my lifestyle has increased my confidence, and I notice how people watch me as I enter a room now. It feels magical.
(It’s how you carry yourself. It’s a vibe. It’s an energy. It’s a mindset. It’s how you feel about yourself. You feel good about yourself because of all of the action you’re taking, the results you’re getting and the successes that you’re having. Success makes you feel a little more confident. Even failure can make you feel better, because you took action and you learned something. That’s a win as well. It’s all how you look at it. It’s all how you define it.
If you get excited about failure, and you look forward to failure, you’ll be willing to take more action than the average person that’s scared of looking bad to other people. You’ll zip through things that they’ll spend years stuck on.)
Through my own self-development, my friends are all asking about this big shift in my behavior, and I have directed them to your work alongside some others, but they haven’t read a page.
(That’s reality. I’ve got lots of friends who know what I do for a living, and they admire the hell out of me and I love them to death, they’re family, but when it comes to drinking some green juice, a smoothie, or going to the gym, they’re like, “Ehh.” It’s like it goes in one ear and out the other. All you can do is gently lead and suggest.
What’s interesting is, until people really experience a severe amount of pain and hit the wall, that’s usually the only time they’re really willing to make major changes in their life. They don’t have a compelling enough reason.)
This constant questioning from my friends and family has led me to discover my purpose – so I’m studying to be a life coach.
(What does a coach do? A coach teaches fundamentals of some kind of particular subject. What makes a good life coach? Somebody who has overcome something. In other words, you have a challenge or something you’re not really good at, and then you acquire the knowledge it takes to become great at it and you actually apply it and get some experience, then you’re qualified to help somebody overcome something.
If you’re going to become a coach of some kind, make sure you master something. You have to become an expert at overcoming a challenge. And you have to have a compelling reason to do it. You have to be emotionally invested and love the idea of helping people.)
I have also met one incredible woman last month at a personal development get-together. We hit it off with a lot of the same interests. I cracked some stupid joke about my removals business, which wasn’t funny at all, and she laughed, so the attraction was obvious, and connection was immediate.
(Yeah, you’re happy, you feel like you’re making progress, your business is getting better, you’re focused on becoming a better human being, and she’s there doing the same thing. Remember, people who like the same things tend to like each other. You’re both trying to become better human beings. Therefore, you have a lot in common.)
After an hour or so of talking, I asked her out and she rejected me.
(You have to build rapport.)
No seriously, I was as shocked as you probably are. Then 1 week later she messaged me, and we have been out on 3 great dates so far.
(It’s easy and effortless. You have a lot in common. You’re both at a personal development seminar. You have lots of similar goals and similar values from that perspective. And you spent a whole hour talking to her, plenty of time to build rapport, causing her to feel safe and comfortable. She reached out to you first. You’re not going to get rejected in a situation like that.)
The reason I write this e-mail is because your book does not teach men about women. It teaches men how to think, walk, talk and act like an alpha male, and this spills over into every area of his life. The more I apply your principles, the more focused I get on my own life, and everything else just seems to fall into place.
(It’s like Dale Carnegie said, “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.” And Harry Truman said, “Imperfect action is better than perfect inaction.” If you’re busy taking action, you’re learning things and you’re feeling good. It also forces you into the present moment, which is where you need to be to be at your best.)
If I meet a woman and I like her I will ask her out. Simple. I now have the confidence and the know how to do that anywhere, where my friends still need 4 or 5 pints stuck down their throat.
Men out there need to read your work to improve ALL areas of their life and create an amazing lifestyle that leaves them feeling confident, happy and with a healthy dose of self-respect. Meeting awesome women just seems to come with that.
(When you become awesome, other people are going to recognize your awesomeness and want to know what the hell you’re all about.)
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:
From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Life and living at your personal best is to be found living in the present moment, taking action towards becoming all that you are capable of being. The action you take or fail to take today is what will determine what your future becomes. Winners expect to win and take the actions required to eventually manifest their grandest goals and dreams, despite the fact that success lies far off in the future or seems unrealistic to others. Losers quit and give up on their dreams when the first sign of difficulty or challenges arise, and then they seek to sabotage the dreams of those around them, so they can convince them to give up like they have, and so they can feel better about their lack of success. Misery loves company. Your inner circle ideally should consist of people who are just as committed to their own greatness as you are to your own, and who celebrate and encourage your victories and continued perseverance.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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