What to do when you are frustrated with constant fighting & breakups so your relationship becomes what you want. It can be very frustrating when you are dating a woman you love, but who you constantly argue with or butt heads over her saying she does not trust you. I remember when I was dating my wife before we got married, and that she was often jealous, needy and insecure about our relationship. There was a period of time of where she was constantly accusing me of sleeping with or hooking up with other women behind her back. Deep down she could tell I was not fully present and in love with her. However, at that time I was too weak to admit that the relationship was not what I really wanted deep down, and I therefore stayed in it longer than I should’ve. I got married to her when my heart was telling me otherwise. I finally got to a point where I got tired of her jealousy and insecurity because I never had any intention of cheating on her. I was faithful to her and I simply put my foot down and told her that she needed to get over her feelings of insecurity and inadequacy and to never bring it up to me again. She never did after that. When a woman does not feel you are totally there and present in the relationship, she will often become bitchy or upset with you. The following is an e-mail from a reader who broke up with a girlfriend he is still hooking up with. When she comes back, he chases too hard which pushes her away. He’s frustrated that it’s not going anywhere and writes to me asking for my help. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:
Corey,
Thanks for all of your advice. I am going to order your book today. (You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.) Here is the situation. I was with this lady for 3 1/2 years. Our relationship was full of sex and fights. (Men who understand women do not argue with them. They communicate in a loving and mature adult manner.) The fights were about her not trusting me. (That tells me that she did not feel you were fully present in the relationship. There were things you should have been doing that you were not. When men tell women they will do things and then they do not, it causes them to become bitchy because they don’t trust your masculine core. This ruins a woman’s ability to feel safe and comfortable in the relationship.) I am and was totally into this woman and took great offense to her thinking I was not true. We eventually moved in, but the fights won out and she moved out 3 months later. (You don’t understand women, that is why you fight with your girl.) Since then she has been manipulating the crap out of me and I keep letting it happen. She had me over 4 times for sex and to tell me that she loves me. Finally she said “no more, leave me alone, I’ve moved on.” (Sounds like you were chasing her. Chasing women guarantees rejection.) I stopped contacting her. Two weeks later I get this bullshit email to pick up some stuff. (They usually do that to see how you react and if it bothers you that you are not with her. Women will often do things like this when they are unsure of where they stand with you.) She saw that I was doing well and I saw her for a few minutes two days in a row. Hugs and kisses and she says she loves me, but we can’t be together, etc. (Translation: “There’s too much drama being with you.”) I got some help when she moved out. I changed some things in my life and I am now better than ever. (Awesome! Good for you!) She seems the same. (People don’t change, they only become better versions of themselves.) The thing is I truly love this woman, and if there is still a chance I don’t want to give up. I will not contact her as I didn’t last time, and figure a message will come from her at some point. (That’s all you can do. She told you it was over and you should never try to stay with someone who does not want to stay with you.) I’m guessing I should just state what I want and she can take it or leave it? (Stick to what you want when she contacts you, if she is unwilling to give you what you want or treat you the way you want to be treated, then walk away and tell her to call you if she changes her mind. Get busy reading my book and applying what it teaches so you can meet & date better quality women & master your skills of seduction.)
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
**Free with a new Audible.com membership
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: [email protected]
If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:
Make a donation to my work by clicking here to donate via PayPal anytime you feel I have added significant value to your life. You tip your favorite bartender, right? How about a buck... $2... $3... $5... $10... $20... what ever YOU feel its worth, every time you feel I have given you a good tip, new knowledge or helpful insight. Please feel free to donate any amount you think is equal to the value you received from my eBook & Home Study Course (audio lessons), articles, videos, emails, newsletters, etc.
Referring your friends and family to this website so they can start learning and improving their dating and relationship life, happiness, balance and overall success in every area of their lives too!
Purchase a phone/Skype (audio only) coaching session for yourself or a friend by clicking here. Download the Amazon.com Kindle version of my book to your Kindle, Smartphone, Mac or PC for only $9.99 by clicking here. Get the iBook version for $9.99 from the iBookstore by clicking here. Get the Audio Book for FREE $0.00 with an Audible.com membership by clicking here or buy it for $19.95 at Amazon.com by clicking here. Get the iTunes Audio Book for $19.95 by clicking here. That way, you'll always have it with you to reference when you need it most. Thank you for reading this message!
From my heart to yours,
Corey Wayne
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Arguing with your girlfriend or wife is a fools errand.” ~ Corey Wayne
Corey Wayne is Life and Peak Performance Coach. He helps men and women to achieve their dreams, discover their purpose, improve their relationships, start a business, improve personal health & fitness, maximize time management, become a superstar in sales, set & achieve their most audacious goals, become a leader, be better team builders, break through their deepest fears and limiting beliefs, overcome difficult life challenges, lose weight and regain balance in all areas of their lives, including personal finances and wealth building.
Reader Interactions
Comments
Andrewsays
Ive emailed you a few weeks ago (thank you very much for your response) and have been through your book five times now. I am legally separated with two children and have been “married” for 13 years. We have reconciled to the point where we are together (with the children) every single day but the “wife” refuses to move back in. Accuses me of being unfaithful, and constantly claims to have no faith or trust in me. I recently put her in her place (using advice from one of your videos) stating that I love and adore her but I am tired and done with hearing her false accusations. Told her at this point, (after trying to reconcile over a year) that those accusations are false and are HER issues, and I dont want to hear about them again. Said I love her and adore her and would love to have a “normal” relationship with her again, but the accusations must stop. Shes been alot nicer the past few days and that issue is not coming up however her lack of intimacy and outright refusal to move back in has me at wits end. I have tried very hard, just to have fun, hook up, and not constatnly bring up relationship issues but after a year of this, I still got bed alone every night. I am very focused with my work (own two business and numerous peices of rental real estate i worked very hard for) but have a hard time with this relationship. I often feel if there werent kids involved, I should just walk away as sometimes peoples values just arent aligned. I dont want to give ultimatums, or be controlling (your cat analogy comes t mind) but it has come to the point for me that if shes not interested enough to have our family together, then why bother anymore? Thoughts? Thanks in advance.
To Corey,
im quite experience with being in controle of my life and my Mrs after learning the hard way like you did.and how you advise your customers about being needy.well guess what I’ve fell victim lol.
Well the main problem is that she says I never wanted to do anything with her and I snap and treating her like shit.well I do cook for her and make tea.but the above is right because of pain and frustration.
now when she was upset and and broke it off I would normally just say whatever and not give her the attention or turn it around.but I took her seriously and chased her with flowers and card and all the other bullshit. But the reason I broke the rule was because she said I was a dick head and I wanted to show her I was a nice guy from the heart without games.
This is what she said ” I was crying because I was angry and I dont know how now you could be acting so nice just wish u acted like this all the time these past couple of years it’s a anoyng and heart breaking but I wish u all the happiness”.now she keeps telling me to move on and all this.now I know she’s been unhappy and maybe she’s ended it because of she slept with someone or because I’ve been a jerk or both. Who knows.she could of just had enough.but she is really upset.last time I rang her was out of a fit of jealously and kicked off on the phone because I thought she was with someone else.bad mistake.its nothing do with me now.
How do I A get her want me B get her to think im not a jerk and C give me another chance.she says I’ve had enough chances and she’s giving me no more of her time.
Andrew says
Ive emailed you a few weeks ago (thank you very much for your response) and have been through your book five times now. I am legally separated with two children and have been “married” for 13 years. We have reconciled to the point where we are together (with the children) every single day but the “wife” refuses to move back in. Accuses me of being unfaithful, and constantly claims to have no faith or trust in me. I recently put her in her place (using advice from one of your videos) stating that I love and adore her but I am tired and done with hearing her false accusations. Told her at this point, (after trying to reconcile over a year) that those accusations are false and are HER issues, and I dont want to hear about them again. Said I love her and adore her and would love to have a “normal” relationship with her again, but the accusations must stop. Shes been alot nicer the past few days and that issue is not coming up however her lack of intimacy and outright refusal to move back in has me at wits end. I have tried very hard, just to have fun, hook up, and not constatnly bring up relationship issues but after a year of this, I still got bed alone every night. I am very focused with my work (own two business and numerous peices of rental real estate i worked very hard for) but have a hard time with this relationship. I often feel if there werent kids involved, I should just walk away as sometimes peoples values just arent aligned. I dont want to give ultimatums, or be controlling (your cat analogy comes t mind) but it has come to the point for me that if shes not interested enough to have our family together, then why bother anymore? Thoughts? Thanks in advance.
Andrew J Tressler
John Dionne says
To Corey,
im quite experience with being in controle of my life and my Mrs after learning the hard way like you did.and how you advise your customers about being needy.well guess what I’ve fell victim lol.
Well the main problem is that she says I never wanted to do anything with her and I snap and treating her like shit.well I do cook for her and make tea.but the above is right because of pain and frustration.
now when she was upset and and broke it off I would normally just say whatever and not give her the attention or turn it around.but I took her seriously and chased her with flowers and card and all the other bullshit. But the reason I broke the rule was because she said I was a dick head and I wanted to show her I was a nice guy from the heart without games.
This is what she said ” I was crying because I was angry and I dont know how now you could be acting so nice just wish u acted like this all the time these past couple of years it’s a anoyng and heart breaking but I wish u all the happiness”.now she keeps telling me to move on and all this.now I know she’s been unhappy and maybe she’s ended it because of she slept with someone or because I’ve been a jerk or both. Who knows.she could of just had enough.but she is really upset.last time I rang her was out of a fit of jealously and kicked off on the phone because I thought she was with someone else.bad mistake.its nothing do with me now.
How do I A get her want me B get her to think im not a jerk and C give me another chance.she says I’ve had enough chances and she’s giving me no more of her time.
Never been hear before.
cheers john