When You Care TOO Much

What you should do when you realize that the person who you are dating is not putting the same level of effort into your relationship that you are. How to get people who you are dating to start appreciating and making more of an effort to enhance and contribute to your relationship.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who asks me to analyze what went wrong in his relationship that led to his girlfriend only seeing him twice per month before breaking up with him. He lists seven different red flags he noticed along the way that were signs his approach was failing, and that she really wasn’t that into him. He saw what he wanted to see. He ignored reality, but ultimately, he could not ignore the consequences of ignoring reality.

“When you love and respect yourself, you will notice when people who you are in relationship with are not making the same level of effort to make you feel loved and appreciated, as you are them. The self loving and self respecting thing for you to do is to lovingly communicate through your words and actions that their lack of reciprocation is not acceptable. The quickest way to get someones attention when they are taking you for granted or not appreciating you, is to go spend your time with people who do appreciate and value you. When people treat you properly, you reward them with the continuing gift of your time. When they do not, they get to have the experience of missing you. See yourself as a gift and a blessing, and only spend your time with people who also see you as a gift and a blessing. Otherwise, giving the gift of your time and presence when it is not valued, appreciated or reciprocated, simply invites and enables more of the same behavior.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne