Why She Doesn’t Call Anymore

What to do when your girl stops calling & initiating contact so she starts calling & wanting to hook up again. The important thing to understand is that when a woman rejects you and tells you she doesn’t want to be exclusive with you anymore, it’s because her interest is really low in you. The absolute worst thing you can do when you’ve been rejected is to continually call hoping that you can change her mind. Some guys think, “if I could just see her, I know she would change her mind.” Guys who think this way are simply deluding themselves. Since men have logical minds, they reason that by being around the woman who has rejected them will cause her to start wanting them again. The reason they have pushed them away is because they do not feel safe and comfortable anymore. Usually it’s because they feel suffocated. The following is an e-mail from a reader whose girlfriend dumped him a month ago. However, she said they could still be sex friends. However, when he talks to her he says it doesn’t feel like she actually wants to see him anymore. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:

Hey Coach,

I’m in a bit of an odd predicament. My girlfriend broke up with me a month ago, but when she did she left sex on the table. Meaning we could be sex friends. Long story short, by being a weak bitch about the break up, we decided not to talk for a while. (Translation: “She decided she did not want to talk to me for a while.”) I called her a week later and 3 times after over the next few days to talk. (Why? This does nothing to make her want you again. Women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. When you call her and chase her after she dumps you, it gives her confirmation that she made the right decision. When you walk away and never look back, it makes her doubt her decision and she will call you eventually if she still has interest. The phone/skype/texting/email/etc. is for setting appointments, not chit chatting.) It just feels weird going from talking all the time and being so close, to nothing. (You need to let it go. Stop acting like a needy woman. Act like a man!) I didn’t talk to her for a week. When I got on skype she called me, but I was planning to talk to another girl so I ended the call with her after 30 seconds.

Since then she has been super curious about who I’ve been talking to. (That’s a good thing.) To the point of acting really sad and saying that she feels something is wrong with me. She feels that I’m hiding something from her and that I used to be open because we used to talk about everything, share everything and that she feels most comfortable with me. I held my ground and didn’t say anything. The weird thing is, it doesn’t feel like she wants to get back together with me. (Why would she? She dumped you, but you continue to chase her and blow her phone up. That will only drive her away further and cause her to perceive you as a weak and unworthy man. Therefore… no pussy for you!) It’s been hard to read. I know that if we hung out that it would be fun and we would definitely have sex. (That’s the lie guys tell themselves to justify continually chasing a woman in hopes she will eventually say yes after rejection.) But I also know that she is most likely going to date other dudes. She is really attractive and has an ass like heaven. She doesn’t try to contact me and sometimes it feels like she isn’t even interested when we talk, but she still wants to be close. (That is because you are still initiating contact with her. She knows she can have you anytime she wants, therefore, she does not want you at all.) I’m going to keep dating other women, but I’m not sure if I should walk away from her and never look back, or keep a pretty good friendship where we do have sex and can see each other. (Stop contacting her completely! Wait to hear from her. When she does contact you say, “So I suppose you want to get together?” if she does not bring it up by the 3rd or 4th text. If she says yes, then make definite plans for her to come see you at your place. If she says no, then tell her to hit you up when she wants to see you and leave the conversation. This will make her wonder if you’ve been snatched up by another goddess. She’ll either stop calling you, or come to see you. You should also read my book ASAP. You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.) I can’t see her all the time since she lives in New Jersey, and I live in New York.

Thanks

Allan

“Impatience never commanded success.” ~ Edwin H. Chapin