How women test men physically, so you can easily pass their tests and seduce them without any fear of rejection or attachment.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email success story from a viewer who started following me about five years ago, after his uncle recommended he watch my videos. He shares how he got cocky and full of himself after cherry picking info from my videos, but not reading the book to learn the fundamentals.
He shares a few situations with different women where the light bulb finally went off after much rejection, and he was able to start seducing women effortlessly by passing their tests, where before he was failing them and getting rejected. It’s a great email that perfectly illustrates the subtle nuances between causing women to be sexually attracted versus being totally turned off and uninterested in sex. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
How’s life dude? I came across you by chance about 5 years ago, after hearing my uncle listening to your video about the no contact rule or something similar. It didn’t apply to me, as I was very young, 16 at the time, and had never been in a serious relationship, just lame high school girlfriend type of stuff.
(At least you had a girlfriend in high school. I did not.)
Throughout my teen years, I was never very successful with women, because I was essentially a beta male who used instant messaging apps to communicate with girls, and as you teach, excessive contact just ends up turning them off, every time without fail. Looking back, I felt stupid because I knew I was a cool guy. I had a lot of friends and I boxed, so I was tough. I just didn’t get women.
Anyway, I decided to give Tinder a try this year, and after many trial and error conversations and matches, I figured out what worked for me, and I can get a phone number within a few messages now. It’s almost too easy.
At some point, when thinking about how I should go about not fucking it up with these girls, I remembered your video and your name and thought I’d look you up on YouTube and see if you had anything good to say, as my uncle swore by you before.
(Tell your uncle I said thanks for the referral.)
So I did that, and at that time, I was just cherry picking information from your videos, not reading the book, which I regret.
(You watched a few videos, trying to cherry pick some information, because you were lazy. Most people are looking for the shortcut to things in life. That means success may be obtainable, but if you don’t know the fundamentals of the book,it’s not going to be sustainable.)
I started out by setting definite dates, just as you teach, and not blowing up their phones with texts, just one text asking them when they’re available. For the first few months, I got cancelled on every time. It didn’t make any sense to me, because I thought, “Hey, I’m not blowing up their phones. I’m setting definite dates, then getting off the phone. What gives?”
(If you’re just meeting them strictly through the internet, you don’t need to spend any more than 10-15 minutes max on the phone, just seeing how the conversations flows. If you’re having a hard time conversing with a girl on the phone, why the fuck would you want to meet them for a drink? If it doesn’t flow on the phone, it isn’t going to flow in person.
The idea is, you want to work smarter, not harder. Use the phone to prequalify women. If they’re not good at keeping the conversation going, they’re not interesting or their voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard, you want to be able to say “I’ve got to run” and get off the phone.)
I’ve still not figured out why those girls cancelled, but at the end of the day, if they don’t want to date me, it’s their loss!
(I would say more than likely you didn’t spend enough time creating rapport. You want to spend at least 10-15 minutes talking to see if the conversation flows, because if it doesn’t, don’t waste your time. There are way too many fish in the sea.)
Anyway, fast forward a few months and a few actual dates, I started to see the subtle testing that women do to measure you up as a man. In the beginning, I thought I was hot shit, because I’d been watching your videos. I was totally convinced that I was passing all of their tests, and they thought I was the shit, but as I gained ore experience and learned more from your book, I realized that I’d actually failed a LOT of their tests.
One example, my first Tinder date ever was with this absolutely smoking hot 18 year old, phenomenal body. The date was going well. I just asked her about herself, let her do most of the talking, we had drinks at a bar, and then I saw the signs were there, so I went for the kiss. This was like 3 hours after meeting her.
We went to another place that was open late, and the rest of the date was pretty much her trying to bite my tongue off. At one point, we were making out outside the place, and she pulled back and said, “You have a little boner by the way.” Looking back, it was obviously just a little jab at my pride.
(I would say, “It’s not my fault. You did that.” Or you could say, “I think YOU made a little boner by the way. And you might want to stop, because I might end up ripping my pants.” That was cheesy, but fuck it. That’s the whole point. Treat her like a bratty little sister, saying absurd, stupid things.
She was just sizing you up, metaphorically. Guys that scare women get mad or angry really easy, especially when one takes a dig at their manhood like that. If they get defensive, that tells her being alone with him is not a good idea.)
I doubt she was seriously questioning the size of my manhood. She wanted to see what my reaction would be. It totally took me by surprise, and I was silent for a few seconds before stuttering out, “Ha-ha, well that’s just what happens when you’re kissing a beautiful woman.”
(That basically communicates, “This is the first time I’ve ever kissed a beautiful woman.” This doesn’t happen to me very often.)
Such a lame, half-assed bribe-for-sex compliment. Also, the manner in which I replied, by stuttering and looking shocked failed the test.
(Yeah, you totally collapsed.)
She tested me a few more times, and I failed those too. Safe to say, I didn’t get laid that night or see her again, yet after the date, I was totally convinced that I’d passed her tests and seduced her. But if I had, I’d have been inside her, or at least had more dates with her. But you live and learn I guess.
(That’s how I learned dude, by fucking up and fumbling my way through. The reality is, nobody’s an expert at sex, dating, seduction or relationships right out of the womb. We all have to learn these things.)
I have noticed that it’s not just with words that women test you, but physical actions. I met a different girl from Tinder not long ago. She’d made it clear that sex was on the table, obviously, dependent on if I behaved like a real man or not, and during our date, we had been making out, stopping to chat, then making out again.
(Two steps forward, and one step back, right out of the book. That’s where the non-attachment comes in. Being able to take a step back shows that you can take it or leave it. This kind of thing happens all the time.)
We’d just been talking, and I went to kiss her again, but she pulled back slightly, stared into my eyes and smiled at me. Corey I don’t know how I knew, but without even having to think about it, I knew this was a test to see what my reaction would be to me not getting what I want,
(Again, this is where you don’t take yourself so seriously. You don’t care one way or another, because this kind of thing happens all the time),
figuring out if she turned me down for sex, if I would flip out, try and force it or some other crap like that.
(The average guy would be going, “What’s the matter? Did I do something to offend you, to upset you? I’m sorry.” That’s what the typical guy starts to do.)
So instead of leaning further in to try and kiss her, which would have been failing the test, I simply remained where I was, smiled and said, “That’s alright. I can wait here for you to come here and kiss me all night,” letting her know I knew the game, and wasn’t about to fall for it. Safe to say, she didn’t last 5 seconds before she was making out with me again, and she practically invited herself to my house for some indoor Olympics.
(Your response basically said, “I know you like me, and I know you’ll be back. And I’m okay with waiting. It’s cool. It doesn’t bother me one way or another. A subtle response is the difference between hooking up and going home with blue balls. It’s not so much what you say, but how you say it.)
Then a few weeks later, she did the same test when we were in bed together, passionately making out with me, then pulling back to see if I’d give chase. I simply laid my head back on the pillow and said, “I’ll just lie here. You can climb on top whenever you feel like it. I’ve got all night.” I closed my eyes and lay there. Yet again, 10 seconds later, and she was on top of me.
(You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free, and that’s what you were doing here. You enabled her to feel free to come and go. You completely made her feel safe and comfortable. With the first girl, she felt uncomfortable and you failed her test, and that’s why you didn’t get laid.)
I guess I’ve learned that you can’t let your guard down, because you can get hit with a test, both physical or verbal, out of nowhere, and if you’re not ready for it, you can totally fuck up all the progress you’ve been making.
(That’s why I say read my book 10-15 times. When you do that, it becomes instinctual.)
Thanks Corey. The stuff you teach has really helped me out!
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Men who are successful in getting women to like and want them sexually give off a different vibe than guys who can’t get a date or women to pay any attention to them. Success is having an abundance of choice and being forced to be discerning, skeptical and prequalifying. Not having success is being in a state of perpetual scarcity, lack, no choices, bad choices or begging for attention. Abundance means you are happy to take or leave a situation without attachment, because it’s not ideally what you want. Scarcity means compromising your principles, values, wants, needs and desires due to desperation, irrational fears and not having what you want. The difference that makes the difference is being able to let go and place your attention elsewhere when it’s not reciprocated.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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