You Must Participate In Your Own Rescue

May 16, 2015 by Coach Corey Wayne

Serious young man outdoors in park at nightI received three separate emails from a newsletter reader in response to three different newsletters/articles he read. He likes to complain and seek sympathy for his lack of success with women. You must participate in your own rescue if you want your life to change for the better. That is something he has yet to commit himself to do. People have to get tired and over their circumstances before they will endeavor to do anything to change them. They have to get to the point where they have had enough of the way things are in life. Disgusted to the point that they will no longer tolerate or accept living a life of mediocrity and quiet desperation. A life that is less than they are capable of living and that they know they deserve. My comments are in (parenthesis like this):

Here’s his first email:

Corey,

I thank you for all the emails. However, I don’t think your positive message stands to add any value to my life. (You are right. If you do not apply what you learn from me, I guarantee nothing in your life will change. The definition of insanity, is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Couple having drinks You expect the perfect gal to knock on your front door and profess her love for you, and that you have to do nothing for that to happen. Good luck with that strategy. If you apply what I teach, you will see that it works for you.) You see, I desperately want to turn it all around and live my life effortlessly, (“Faith without action is meaningless.” ~ Buddha) , and have all the great women I want, much like yourself and any of the dudes I see out in public nowdays, but I’M NOT GONNA BUST MY ASS TO WORK FOR MY PLACE IN THE SUN IF THERE ARE NO GUARANTEED RESULTS TO BE LEGITIMATELY HAD! (You get what you work for and negotiate in life. Nothing is going to be handed to you.) My main problem in this life is women, and always has been. Since you apparently know what you’re talking about, please answer this: How is it that most men never have to seek advice from anyone and have always had no problem with getting their way with women? I mean, come on man!! I’ve seen it all my life. Some guys have it and are born with it, and a few others spend their existences worrying if they’ll always be alone ’til death. (Some guys grow up in healthy families where they love themselves, each other and their children. They freely say and show affection towards one another making each other feel loved. They encourage and support the attainment of each others dreams always, so of course it’s easy for those guys. Lonely man at bar Well, that ain’t you and me. I don’t know what planet you are living on, but our divorce rate is over 50%, and only about 3% of people in relationships are happy, in love, and fulfilled. The rest are just not miserable enough, nor do they have the guts to do anything about it. So if you want to continue to cry over the cards that you have been dealt in life, that is your choice. In life you are either a passenger or a pilot; it’s your choice. I can only help people who are willing to help themselves. You have to participate in your own rescue. No one can do it for you.)

Thank you Sir,

Tom

This next email of his is in response to a newsletter client who was upset about things that went sideways with a chick he was dating:

Corey,

I can’t believe a guy who gets plenty of action and attention is pms-ing over one gal. What an asshole. It must be nice to have choices in life. Corey, can you tell by my comment that I am angry, (fear is always behind anger), extremely envious, (that comes from a scarcity mindset), and resentful, (pissed off at yourself that you have not made the decision to be a man of action and change your life and lifestyle for the better), of guys like that? Is there any way to shed emotions like that? Surprised, unsure handsome young man looking at camera (Yep, take action and succeed with women, and the limiting belief dissolves as the illusion that it is.) Thank you. (Yeah, get off your ass and start trying to get better with women by practicing interacting with them. At least that guy was actually trying to get better, unlike you. Knowledge is only potential power. Putting the knowledge into action becomes power. Practice makes perfect. Repetition is the mother of skill. “Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” ~ Michael Jordan. “Most people have the will to win, few have the will to prepare to win.” ~ Bobby Knight. “He who is not satisfied with himself will grow. He who is not sure of his own correctness, will learn many things.” ~ Chinese Proverbs.)

Tom

This following comment of his was in response to my article, “Women Want To Be In A Love Story“:

“Wow man. How the hell does one attain power such as that? I’m an OTR Trucker and I see that kind of shit a lot. Believe it or not, I do. I don’t know how to cease the loneliness and despair. All I see all day, every day is jaw-dropping women, and I’m getting none. I am pretty good looking, so it shouldn’t be a problem, but the statuesque beauties don’t even notice. I hope you might have some blunt words that I can take to heart and maybe help myself. After all, asking for help is the first step, right? That’s what all my counselors tell me anyway.”

Here is my response to him:

Hi Tom,

Well, if you’re ready for things to change for the better in your life, then you need to hire me as your coach so you can start writing me stuff like this:

Photo by iStock.com/zegers06
“Hey Corey! Whats going on? This last week has been a blast. Went to a bar downtown with a bunch of buddies last Saturday. Got three different numbers, one of them was a cougar. Her and I are going on a date next Tuesday. Quite some time ago, I told you I got a number from a girl. Well, when we got back to my buddy’s house after the bar Saturday, she was there along with my buddy’s wife. Well, those two went off to bed leaving the girl alone with me. Let me just say I had to be at work at 7:00 A.M. and got about two hours of sleep. But anyway, just thought I’d fill ya in! Talk to you soon!”

Remember what I said, you have to participate in your own rescue if you want your life to change. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. This is the first step.

From my heart to yours,

Corey Wayne

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Published on May 16, 2015

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