Why you’re never too old to improve, get better and become the person you were meant and destined to be.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss a short email success story from a sixty-one year old recovering nice guy. Thanks to my book, videos and articles, he’s leaving behind who he was, along with his bad dating strategies, to finally stop wasting his time and life away being perpetually placed in friend-zone with women he wanted romantically.
He has realized he wasted so much of his life and time hoping to get out of friends-zone, that he’s excited about the possibilities he will get to experience in the coming months by applying what he’s learned from me. He’s decided he’s going to show up as a better version of himself, so he can finally experience what has eluded him his whole life. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
I just ran across your website. I got the book, and I’m looking forward to reading and studying it.
Your book is extremely timely. I just ended a long-standing friendship with a woman that wasn’t going anywhere. It took me a long time to recognize what was happening. I’m 61 years old, and this pattern that I just went through is not new.
(As they say, if you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’re going to continue to get what you’ve always got. You’re realizing at 61, “I’m never getting out of the gate.” I experienced the same thing, and in my late twenties I really got serious and said, “I have to figure this out.”)
I’ve done it many times before. It’s like an audio program in my psyche. Even now after ending the friendship, I can hear myself thinking, “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything,” etc.
(We all have doubts. We have two primary fears. Fear that we’re not enough, in other words, fear we don’t have what it takes, and fear that we won’t be loved and accepted by our friends, family and peer group. In this case, your fear is that you won’t be loved by this girl you want.You’re second-guessing yourself saying, “Maybe if I just keep doing what I’ve always done, this one will be different.”
Obviously after 61 years, when you’ve seen the same pattern over and over again, you start to realize if you do what you’ve always done, I’m going to continue to get what I’ve always got. And the reality is, most people in life never get to this point. Whether it’s their job, their career, the business they always wanted to start, getting in shape or that mediocre relationship they’re involved in, they just never really do anything about it.
What matters is what you do right now, going forward. You eventually got to the point where you pulled the trigger and said, “That’s it. I’m out of here. No more of this. I’m tired of living this way. I deserve better.”)
I went through a classic friend-zone, which until recently, I hadn’t really understood the dynamics, but I fell into right at the start and never had a chance of getting out on my own. I wasted a lot of time, but hopefully that will soon be behind me.
Even at my age, I am excited to read, metabolize and apply your book and video concepts. I write this email as a starting point and hope that in the months ahead, I will write one that is a success story.
Looking forward to the program.
(Well, as the old saying goes, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, and this is the first step. I went through something very similar in my mid-thirties. I had a lot of success in life and real estate. I knew nothing but an upward trajectory my whole life, and I came to realize my heart was going in another direction. I thought to myself, “What would I do if I had to start all over?” What came to my mind was, I wanted to mentor and help people, so they could experience the same kind of success in their own lives as I have experienced in my own.)
“You’re never too old to improve, get better, grow and evolve beyond your current comfort-zone and life circumstances. You must first create a vision for your life and what you want to accomplish. Then you must come up with emotionally compelling reasons why you want to accomplish it. Once you know what you want and why you want it, then you must create a plan to execute, and most importantly, take the actions required to become the person you need to be in order to accomplish what you want. Then you simply measure the results you are getting, continually adjust and refine your approach, and continue to learn from, model and improve upon, what others more successful than you are doing that enables them to achieve superior results. Success leaves clues. By studying other successful people and doing what they do successfully, you’ll achieve your outcomes in the shortest time possible.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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