How focusing on becoming a better man, your purpose and mission in life can help you overcome your weaknesses, conquer your fears and succeed with women like never before.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who shares how my work has helped him to recover from the end of his seven-year marriage. He says his confidence was shot and his self-esteem was really low. He says, after all those years of being married, he forgot how to approach and communicate with women. Even though it has been a hard and painful process to get rid of his weaknesses and become a better man, he says he would do it all over again. He details how he is now in the best shape of his life, looks ten years younger, had his first threesome, is calmer and more relaxed, and he details several success stories he has had with different women.
He even had a several-month-long fling with a smoking hot exchange student, who totally knocked his socks off, before she returned to her country. It’s a great success story of how a guy can go from hitting rock bottom and thinking he’s worthless, to exceeding his expectations in every area of his life that is important to him, in under a year. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
I hope you’re doing well. I’m a 32-year old, South American guy, living in Europe for many years, and I’ve been following your work for 1 year. Before finding your work on the internet, I was going through a devastating period of my life. (Most people find me when their life is going sideways in some way. They realize their strategy isn’t working, and they are looking for solutions.) I broke up with my ex, after almost 7 years of marriage, I was really lost and I had a lot of doubts about my self, women and my future. (When you spend seven years with the same person, your whole identity becomes associated with being in a relationship with them. You spend your life becoming what the other person wants or needs. Now you have to focus on getting back to being the person you were before you met, by reconnecting with old friends and rediscovering old hobbies you enjoyed. As I discussed in my article and video, “12 Principles Of Successful Relationships,” both people in a relationship should maintain their individuality.) I started having problems with my sleep, and it lasted for a long, long time. I started to lose a lot of weight as well. My self-esteem was really low, and I wasn’t able to do my job properly. Fortunately, I’m not the type of person who gives in so easily, so I decided that I had to do something about it. (You hit bottom and realized, the way you were going about your life wasn’t working.) Before I found out about your work, I wasn’t doing well with women either. After all those years of marriage, I had kind of forgotten how to approach and communicate with them. My game was crap!!! It was making the whole situation even worse by lowering my self-esteem, and I started to believe women didn’t want me, and I wasn’t a “catch” anymore, as I used to be in the past. (You can’t help but feel that way sometimes, but that’s okay. It’s important to feel it to heal it.)
I started to watch your videos on YouTube, and I then I bought your book, which I’ve read 3 times so far. (Come on man. You’ve got to step up your game.) In the course of one year, I changed a lot. Sometimes, it feels like I’m not the same person anymore. It was a hard and painful process to get rid of my weaknesses and to become a better man, but I did it, and I would do it all over again. (When you’ve been in a relationship that long, you’re going to have doubts about yourself and be fearful, since it’s been so long since you interacted with women in that way, but the only way you’ll get better is by taking action. You have to give yourself permission to fail. When it comes to asking women out, the reality is, most of them will reject you, but that’s okay because all you need is one good one.) Since I started to apply the things you teach, everything changed. I learned that, as a man, I had to focus on my goals, my purposes and my mission in life. (That’s what being a man is all about. That is the embodiment of masculine energy.) A man’s main purpose in life can’t be “just getting laid.” (Exactly. That’s why I don’t focus on those things. How you perceive yourself is how other people will perceive you. Your inner game determines your success or failure in life.) I became a more confident and centered man with emotional self-control, and you know what? Women find it very attractive. I will mention some of the things that happened in my life in the course of one year, since I started following your work:1) I’m in my best shape ever and still getting better. (That tells me you are focused on getting a little better every day.) Some girls even say that I look 10 years younger than I am.
2) I’ve become a much calmer and centered person. (Bill Murray said someone once told him, “You will do your best work when you’re relaxed.” Make sure your life and lifestyle supports you being in a relaxed state.)
3) I have also become a much happier person, and everybody notices it. Some of them are really amazed about how much I’ve changed in such a short period of time. (You’re fired up with enthusiasm.)
4) I have now a great friendship with my ex. (Good for you dude.)
5) I’ve become a better father as well, because now I love life, love myself and therefore, I have so much love to give them. (Good job of taking care of you. You can’t give away what you don’t have for yourself.)
6) I have never felt so confident before, both in my professional and in my private life as well. (When you feel like you’re making progress towards your goals, you will feel happier and healthier.)
7) I have been dating several women, and most of them younger than me.
8) A dream came true in 2015. Guess what?!! I had a threesome with a blonde and a brunette, Ha-ha!
9) I’m getting a degree besides my job, and I’m doing really well. (You’re continuing to invest in knowledge.)
10) Besides your book, I’ve also read some others personal growth books, such as, “The Power of Now,” by Eckhart Tolle, “Awaken the Giant Within,” by Tony Robbins, and “The 5 Love Languages,” by Gary Chapman, which you recommend on your website. I started doing meditation a well, which has become one of my passions. (Meditation can be great to put you in a peaceful and relaxed state.)
11) I met an Eastern European girl, 10 years younger than me, last year who was an exchange student. She’s hot, and she has this bright personality. We hung out, had fun and hooked up for 4 months before she went back to her home country. The time I had with this girl was amazing. Nothing can compare with having sex with a girl that knocks your socks off. Not even a threesome!!! (I absolutely agree.)
Thank you so much for changing my life. I know I’m the one who made all of these accomplishments, but I don’t think I could have done it without your help and guidance. (I’m glad I could fill in your knowledge gap, so you could turn your life around and do well. You’re creating a life and lifestyle that makes you happy.)
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
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From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Benjamin Franklin once said, “An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.” Smart people understand the importance of learning from those who have more skills, experience and success than they do, instead of trying to reinvent the wheel and do everything on their own. No matter what you want to do or become in life, there are usually many people who have gone before you and made all of the expensive and costly mistakes you can avoid by learning from them and learning what to do instead to succeed. Most people spend little to no time learning from those who have what they consider an ideal and successful life. Successful people are no different or smarter than the average person, but what sets them apart is their laser-like focus on filling in their knowledge gaps and persevering to find the quickest and most efficient path to achieving their goals. Unsuccessful people are focused on earning a living and getting through the work week, while successful people are focused on discovering and perfecting their skills to make attainment of their outcomes possible.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
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