What to do when women you are dating or trying to re-attract start acting distant & less-interested in you. It’s very hard to let go of women you want, but who do not act like they are that into you when before it seemed like they could not get enough of you. It’s counterintuitive.
A man’s natural instinct will be to want to try to do something in order to make her chase or pursue him like she did previously. The key concept to understand in order to attract or re-attract a woman whose interest in you has dropped is to understand that it is your inaction that will make her want you more. Why?
Because when she starts to fear or starts to realize that unless she reaches out to you, she will never hear from you again, she will reveal exactly how much or how little she cares about you. If her interest level is still in the 50% range, you’ve still got a chance and she will still contact you. If it’s below that you will never hear from her again.
In order for a woman’s feelings for you to develop slowly over time and continue to stay at a high level, she should be doing 70 to 80% of the pursuing and calling. Women dump and reject guys who chase them. Women go crazy for guys they have to work for and for men who seem indifferent. Men who have a take it or leave it attitude.
In other words, they are happy to have her, but they are just as happy without her and feel no sense of loss or diminishment if she chooses another. The following is an e-mail from a reader who is in the process of re-attracting a girl who dumped him. They recently spent the night together, but now he has noticed that she is backing off once again and he is unsure of what to do next. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:
It’s me Ray, I e-mailed you a week ago about this girl who cut me off first, but then came back after. I did follow your advice, and everything seemed okay. We even spent a night together, (Awesome! Good job!) but recently she acts really strange. It seems like her interest level has gone down. (A woman’s level of romantic interest/attraction for you will fluctuate based upon how well you do with her tests and how much or how little weakness you display.)
She doesn’t text me as much as she did before, and if she does, it’s a very brief message. (Her interest has dropped. You need to make sure you continue to do nothing and wait for her to contact you. Why? She dumped you, remember? She has started contacting you again because she is unsure of where she stands with you.
She contacts you when she needs to feel certain again.) I feel that she is pushing me back. (Remember, women are like cats and sometimes get bored and disinterested. Let them run away. When you don’t chase, they come back as long as they have interest.)
The strange thing is that she seemed totally obsessed with me few days ago by constantly texting, etc., but now everything is totally different. I’m very confused. (You can’t let it affect you. Don’t take it personally. Women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. When they become too certain of where they stand with you, they back away. When they become too unsure of where they stand with you, they contact you in order to gain certainty.
It’s all about feeling your strength when you are away.) Please Corey, help me sort this out. (You need to get more familiar with my book. You still don’t know the material well enough; that is causing you to make unnecessary mistakes that are delaying her return to you. You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.) Thank you!
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“We could never learn to be brave & patient, if there were only joys in the world.” ~ Helen Keller