Give Her Good Sex & Fun Times To Avoid Blue Balls

The importance of being fun & a good sex playmate to turn her on.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who got dumped for good in April of 2025. She had taken several breaks from him before that. She has reached out many times since then, especially lately, but he keeps acting like her emotional tampon and therapist instead of being fun and laying the pipe properly. He’s stuck in friend zone and is in limbo with a bad case of blue balls. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “Give Her Good Sex & Fun Times To Avoid Blue Balls”.

So this particular email is from a viewer. He got dumped for good back in April of 2025. So a year ago this past month now. So before that, he said that she had taken several breaks from him before that. And however, she reached out a few times afterwards. He claimed to be following what’s in 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back, but it looks like he’s just being too nice, too soft, too compliant, too accommodating, and basically acting like her emotional tampon and a therapist.

And so he didn’t hear from her for a while. He started dating, started trying to apply what was in 3% Man to meet some new ladies. But recently, I guess she had a death in the family. She started coming back and again, he’s going to her and trying to be there for her. And somehow he’s adopted this philosophy that, well, while she’s grieving, I can’t try to seduce her.

And at the end of the day, he’s just kind of got him stuck in friend zone. And this is probably in a microcosm, a reason why or the big reason or main reason why his girlfriend dumped him multiple times and finally got rid of him for good in April. But he does go No Contact she comes back, but he’s just not creating the opportunity for sex to happen. He’s going to her.

Because as 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back says, if she ended it, she has to fix it. Therefore, she’s got to do all the reaching out, and then you just make dates at your place to make dinner in the evening. You don’t go to lunches, you don’t go to coffee, you don’t go pick her up. You don’t meet her on neutral ground. You don’t go and do group dates with other people.

If she wants to see you, the farthest distance that you should be willing to travel to see her is to go from wherever you are in your house to your front door to let her in when she comes over. So if she comes over three times in a row and again, she’s doing all the reaching out because she messed it up, she got to fix it. She reaches out, you assume she wants to see you, and you make the date to make dinner in the evening at your place.

You don’t do lunches, you don’t do coffee. You only do romantic things because when a woman agrees to come over, make dinner at your place in the evening, that means sex is on the table. She’s open to something romantic happening. And if a woman is just trying to keep you stuck in friend zone or use you for attention validation, she’s going to try to squirm out of the dinner date and do everything she can possible to not agree to come over to make dinner.

And so as a man, you got to stick to your guns, especially if you were soft and squishy. And more than likely, that’s why he kept getting dumped in the past by this girl, because he was just vacillating back and forth between being a man and leading and basically acting like another chick. Or in some cases, acting like a child that needed an attaboy for mommy. It’s very unattractive. Women like confidence in guys. And so you’re supposed to be direct and decisive and get to the point.

So therefore, she reaches out, you make a date to make dinner, and if she comes over three dates in a row and to make dinner and you hook up all three times, then you can meet her out and pick her up and start taking her on normal dates. But you still got to let her do the contact initiation. That way she comes back to you at her pace, you don’t try to over pursue. Because more often than not, guys in those cases over pursued too much, especially when they got dumped or things went sideways and they just chase her away.

Then they go into no contact, she starts to come back. And like this guy, he’s just been fumbling the football for basically the past year because he’s probably been too soft and too afraid to really apply the things that I teach. But at the end of the day, she’s still pursuing him, but he keeps acting like the gay male girlfriend. And so you can imagine he’s probably got a really bad case of blue balls at this point.

Viewer Email:

Hi Coach,

I’ve been following you since my breakup in April 2025— I’ve read your book three times and recently started Mastering Yourself. Your teachings have genuinely saved my life since my breakup and have made me a better, more grounded man overall, so I really appreciate what you put out there. I wanted to get your perspective on a situation that feels more nuanced than what I can clearly navigate on my own.

Well, this is another reason why I say you’ve got to read the book 10 to 15 times, because if you knew the book and you’ve been reading it and really getting to know what’s in the book, so well you can teach a class on it, then you would see where you’re going wrong and trying to apply 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back. You’re still putting your needs last instead of penetrating your ex with your strength. And that includes physically.

I was in a 6-year relationship with my ex — we started dating when we were 19. We broke up in April of last year after a series of “breaks” she initiated.

Women don’t dump men they’re in love with. They dump men they’ve lost respect and attraction for. You were drying her up, probably because you were vacillating back and forth between acting masculine and acting insecure and feminine. And women don’t like that. They want you to lead the fun bus. You’re supposed to penetrate them with your strength, not a floppy cock.

We briefly met again in May, but she said she wasn’t ready to get back together, so I made the decision to walk away and not wait around.

Which is the right decision.

That’s when I started applying the 7 principles to get an ex back. She reached out again on my birthday in September, and we had some light communication that eventually led to us meeting in December 2025.

So she should have come over to make dinner at your place. But it sounds like you went and met her out. In other words, she set the terms for the negotiating table you submitted to her will. That’s not coming from a place of confidence and strength. Again if she’s supposed to be earning another chance with you because she fucked it up. Well, that’s why she comes to you. She submits to you.

She shows she’s willing to let you lead and come over and make dinner together. And you’re willing to spend time with her and hear her out. You’re just going to hang out and have fun and hook up. Pretty simple. You’re creating the opportunity for sex to happen. You’re not trying to get back together or get in a relationship. You want to beat up her pelvis. That establishes closeness more than anything.

We didn’t hook up, but I followed your advice.

No you didn’t.

I didn’t chase, I let her come to me.

Well, at the end of the day, if she comes to you, and it’s your job to seduce her at a dinner date at your house in the evening.

After some time, we planned to hangout again, but she ended up flaking.

Probably because you continued to vacillate and not lead. Probably he was talking and chit chatting on the phone. Again, the phones were setting dates. She reaches out, you assume she wants to see you invite her over to make dinner, hang out, have fun, hook up. That’s it.

That’s when she told me she didn’t think she could do this.

Probably because you were starting to pursue again. And you weren’t really following what I taught. Because no matter what you say, you think you’re following the work. All I got to do is look at what your woman is doing and saying. And that tells me everything. You turned her off. She came back because she got attracted over time and got to experience what life was like without you. But as soon as she came back, you acted like a big floppy cock and mangina again, and then probably started pursuing her. On top of that, if you hesitate, you’ll masturbate.

And needed to focus on herself and her work.

So the more she interacted with you, the more turned off she became. Because again, you’re not acting like a man as described in 3% Man.

I responded with your classic line, “no worries, if you change your mind get in touch,” and left it there. During that time, I later found out she had been talking to someone else from another province. After that, I fully accepted that things were done. I focused on my life, dated other women, and moved forward. Recently, she reached out again in April after her dad was suddenly hospitalized due to a tragic accident. Before I had the chance to see him, he unfortunately passed away. Since then, she has been messaging me quite a bit for support, and we’ve seen each other a few times. She is no longer speaking to the other person.

So she’s like, oh, I had a really tough time. Your job is to be a fun. She just her dad just died. So you don’t want to dwell on that and get her crying and, you know, do a therapy session. You want her to escape from that pain. You want her to come over and have the mood completely lightened it to be fun and playful. And so she forgets about life and her problems, or her asshole boss, or the girl that she works with and she hates, or whatever it happens to be. So you hang out, you have fun, you hook up.

So she comes over and she’s feeling good and laughing, and she forgets about the difficult things. And you guys have amazing sex. You make her come like a waterfall. She has a bunch of orgasms, then she’s gonna walk away, like feeling good and feeling elated. She comes over to you and she feels negative and sad and lonely and lost. And instead of being the escape from the difficult times and being good in bed, she comes over and you act like a fucking therapist.

Or you’re going to her it seems like. Again, there’s a reason why things are laid out in 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back. You want her to submit to you and it creates no wiggle room. It forces her to either shit or get off the pot. In other words, she’s serious about potentially something romantic happening, or she’s trying to keep you firmly stuck in friend zone. And if she’s bucking the system, if you will, bucking the principles and 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back, well, then you’re not going to make a date with her unless it’s on your terms.

There’s excuses in there. You know, it’s been a long week, you know. She’s trying to get you to go to lunch or meet a group of friends out. Just say it’s been a long week. I’m just moved to hang at my place. If you want to come over and make dinner, then give me a call in a couple of weeks and maybe I’ll be up for meeting you out then. So you’re going to politely decline. Pretty simple. The strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it. And you’ve basically acted like a big pussy, and you’re just too afraid to implement the things that I teach.

And so therefore, she keeps setting the tone. You act like her therapist. You’re not a lot of fun to be around. So she walks away from her interactions with you, feeling negative, depressed, sad instead of feeling like it was a great escape. And the only time her life got better was hanging out with you. And on top of that, she had a bunch of great orgasms. So you got to think about it. Whatever you make a woman feel when she’s with you is what she’s going to associate with being with you.

So every time she comes over and it’s a therapy session and a drag and negative emotions, well, you’re going to be negative emotions. And so therefore instead of our pussy getting wet, she’s going to be drying up. And then she’ll go fuck Chad Thunder Cock because she wants to forget about life and her problems. She wants a man that leads things to the bedroom and good times. You’re supposed to drive the fun bus, dude, not the fucking hearse.

I’ve been there for her, and I am trying to support this unique situation, as I myself am grieving the loss of her father, who I thought at one point would be my father-in-law someday. At the same time, I find myself going back and forth internally — especially knowing she was involved with someone else not long ago. I’m unsure if that’s something I can fully accept or move past.

Right now, I’m trying to navigate supporting her during this time while still applying your principles.

Well, she’s got something. She wants to talk or have a cry. That’s fun. But get her laughing again as quickly as possible and having fun and making her pussy wet dude. Hang out and have fun, hook up. You’re doing hang out, have a unpleasant therapy session and dry her up is what you’re basically doing.

while still applying your principles not over-pursuing, letting her come to me, and maintaining my own boundaries.

Well, you are letting her come to you, but again, you’re not creating an opportunity for sex to happen.

But it feels like a gray area because we’re talking frequently as she needs emotional support.

Well, of course she needs emotional support, but what she really needs is an escape in good times and good orgasms. And you are none of the above right now.

My question is how do I maneuver this situation properly?

How about reading what’s in the book and actually applying it instead of, I mean, the book tells you this is what happens when you don’t listen. You’re kind of stuck in blue ball zone. But she’s still coming to you, so she’s giving you the opportunity. But instead of beating up her pelvis, you’re constantly sending her away with a dry pussy.

How do I support her without becoming overly available even when the idea of “hooking up” is not on the table while grieving?

You’re supposed to create the opportunity for the hooking up to happen, the hooking up happens because the signs are there that again, are laid out in the book. But if you’re not reading the book enough and you’re not really learning the little nuances, you’re clearly completely missing it.

Stay aligned with the 7 principles in a situation where she is reaching out often due to grief?

Well, again, you should be inviting her over making dinner together and beat up her pelvis. And once she comes over three times in a row, like 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back says, instead of you doing the opposite, well, then you can take her out and go on regular dates. And then every time she gets in touch with you, she laughs she has a good time. She forgets about her problems for a while and she gets properly fucked dude. As a man, you got to lay the puck and pipe. That’s the bottom line. I mean, this should be common sense.

If a woman’s getting together and having sex with you, she wants to fucking enjoy it. So make it good for her. Make it worth her time. So she gushes about you to her girlfriends and talks about how fucking skilled you are in the bedroom and how you make her quiver and cum. And she’s fucking thinking about you all the time and playing with herself in the shower, thinking about the next time she’s going to come and see you. That’s what you want happening. It’s like, come on, dude, this guy you’re being is fucking boring.

How do I evaluate whether this is something I should even pursue again, given the past dynamics and accepting she was with someone else?

Well, everybody is somebody else’s leftovers, dude. Who cares? You dated somebody, I assume, before her and vice versa. It’s like that’s the way it is, so who cares? At the end of the day, your job is to create the opportunity for sex to happen. It’s not to lock her down or get her into a relationship. It’s just hang out and have fun, hook up and make it so good that she tries to convince you to be her boyfriend. You don’t have to agree to become her boyfriend. You can say, you know what? Because of what happened, I’m just really down for friends with benefits or, you know, sex playmates.

But I don’t really want to get into a relationship. So live and speak your truth, whatever that happens to be. Instead of letting her lead and giving her the wheel of the fun bus and then letting her drive it right over the cliff with these boring therapy sessions. Come on, man. You gotta actually apply what’s in the book. Not read it and do the opposite.

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