How Social Proof With Other Women Got Me A 2nd Chance

How social proof of success with other women can get you more women.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who shares an update on what happened after he got blown off by a woman who went from excited about him to not feeling it. He shares how another ex of his and his sister provided social proof that caused the girl who wasn’t feeling it to reach out to see him again. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Newsletter is going to be, “How Social Proof With Other Women Got Me A 2nd Chance”.

Well, this is an email update from a viewer whose previous email I answered a little while back. “Why She Went From Being Excited About You To Not Feeling It”. So he provides an update. So this is just another great success story of what a dramatic change it can cause in a woman who has low to no interest, or like in this case, he turned her off and she lost interest in respect for him and then just basically said she wasn’t feeling it.

Well, as soon as she finds out or hears or sees him with another pretty girl or hears about a real pretty girl he was dating, it’s like flipping a switch, complete attitude change. And it just, you know, even though the average woman would deny it. The reality is, if you’re popular with other ladies, especially beautiful ladies, or even just being seen with beautiful ladies, even if they’re your hot sisters, your hot cousins, or, you know, your best friend’s sister or whatever happens to be, even if there’s nothing going on, just being seen in the company of other beautiful women gives you social proof.

And women who aren’t really that interested will all of a sudden take an interest. You know, I wrote about this in an article I did many, many years ago, “How To Get Women To Approach You First”. There’s like three different ways I referenced in the book as well, that particular article. And so when you’re in a bar or a nightclub or some kind of a popular place, you want to position yourself, ideally, if it’s in a bar near where everybody’s got to go to get drinks, you’re not going to go and you don’t need to go and do laps.

You can do the mayor campaign that I’ve talked about in here. But you can also just set yourself up in a high traffic area, and you and your buddies hang out where everybody’s got to come to get drinks and just focus on each other and making each other laugh and have a good time.

And what you’ll notice as the women walk by and they see you guys laughing and joking around and having a good time, and then you look in the corners of the place, there’s a bunch of dudes standing there with their drinks and their chests like this and the other hand in the pocket, and they’re just kind of scoping the room out, not talking to anybody.

They don’t look like they’re having any fun at all. And yet you and your buddies are just joking around and laughing and having a good time and quite frankly, not really paying attention to what’s going on for the most part around you. And that’s the kind of vibe of guys that already have women or that are taken. Maybe they’re married, they have a girlfriend. In other words, their cup runneth over.

They have plenty of women in their life and they don’t, quite frankly, don’t need any more. And what you’ll notice when you do that is, even at first you might just get average or not, that attractive. Women come up and they look into your group, and they’re smiling as they approach because they’re like, wow, you guys look like you’re having fun. Like you’re the life of the party.

And you’re just like, hey, what are you girls up to? Simple opener. And they talk to him for a couple of minutes and you can say, hey, well, it’s great chatting with you. I’m sure we’ll see you later. I’m going to get back to my friends. And then what happens is every time a group of girls comes by and you engage with them for a couple minutes and then you politely, um, discreetly just say, hey, I got to get back to my friends.

Other the prettier women that might be sitting at tables around that watch this. And they notice, like every group of girls comes by and talks to you guys. And so over the course of a half hour to an hour, what you will notice is that the quality of the women gets better. So even if you’re just talking to average women at first, you’re being friendly. It seems like you know everybody. That’s what being popular really is.

You’re well liked, you’re likable, you talk to everybody without judgment. You make people feel comfortable. That’s what popular kids in high school do. One of my best friends was the most popular guy in class, and no matter where we were, even to this day, wherever we go, he’s the life of the party. He always talks to everybody around him, invites him into our circle, asks them where they’re from, what they’re doing, what they’re up to, what they do for a living.

Just basic; how many kids they’ve got? The whole nine yards. Just basic, simple conversational questions. He makes everybody feel comfortable. He takes a sincere, authentic interest and really seeks to find out who they are, what they’re all about, where they’re from, what they do. What makes them happy. And over the years, we’ve had some really interesting conversations with people that you wouldn’t even expect and things that people do for a living that they tell you that’s really unexpected and, quite frankly, pretty interesting.

And then you end up spending a lot of night just listening to them tell you what’s going on. And that in a microcosm is what a popular person does and make everybody feel comfortable. They’re well liked and they make everybody else feel comfortable. And so what you notice if you guys have done this and it could be a party or a barbecue or whatever. You’re just hanging out by the grill where all the food is.

People got to keep coming by and circulate, and eventually everybody makes their way over there, especially in a bar if they’ve got to go to get drinks. And so the really hot girls might be at a table there looking around and scoping around, and they see all the dudes in the corner not having a good time with their beers in front of their chest or their drinks in front of their chest.

And they see your group that’s talking to pretty much every group of girls that comes in, and all the girls walk away with a smile, as if you already know everybody. And then what happens is they’re going to make their way over to you, and then they start talking to you and engaging you in conversation. And so it starts out that you got just average women talking to you, but because of the social proof, just because you’re being friendly and talking to everybody, the really hot, confident girls then start coming over half hour or so later to engage with you.

And that’s just because how social proof works. Anybody that’s ever tried that again, that article is referenced in the book. And you guys that are good, serious students, you’re probably very familiar with it, so you really don’t even have to approach women. You can create the conditions where they will approach you first. And so that’s kind of what you’re seeing here is that this girl really didn’t want anything to do with this guy anymore.

I don’t remember specifically what happened, but at the end of the day, she wasn’t feeling it. So he whatever he did, she went from being interested and excited about him to not feeling it. So she lost interest. And so he goes and he continues living his life having a good time. And you’ll see how this unfolds. It’s like completely changes this girl’s attitude to the point where she reaches out to him and double texts him. So it’s like flipping a light switch.

Viewer Email:

Hi Corey,

You won’t believe what happened with the girl from yesterday’s newsletter, “Why She Went From Being Excited About You to Not Feeling It”.

So this is probably going back about two weeks ago, I guess.

She, let’s call her Jane, actually reached out again. And is now fighting against my ex to get me back. Let’s call my ex Vanessa. Let me explain. Jane just started her college semester. She’s in the same program as my little sister and my ex. My sister is 20, my ex, Vanessa, is a gorgeous 20-year-old, and Jane, the girl who rejected me in your newsletter, is 18 because she skipped two years of school.

So if she skipped two years of school, that means she’s really smart. She’s really high IQ. It’s nice dating smart women. If you date a smart woman, and you have kids with her, your kids are going to be smart. Makes life a lot easier. Because as John Wayne said in one of his movies, he said, “life’s tough pilgrim and it’s even tougher if you’re stupid.”

Jane and Vanessa started becoming friends at the beginning of this semester. At some point, Vanessa, without knowing Jane and I had been on a date, mentioned me to Jane and talked about how much she missed me.

So this is his ex talking to the girl that blew him off and his ex is going, I really miss Bob. He’s such a good man. And so unbeknownst to her, she has no idea that this girl went out, lost interest, and blew her ex-boyfriend off. He continues.

She told Jane how I once saved her life by defending her against her abusive father, including getting into a fistfight.

So obviously Vanessa sounds like she came from a bit of a broken home. If her boyfriend’s got a throw down with her dad, can you imagine? Probably why he’s not with her and why she’s an ex. Because we want a girl who’s easygoing, easy to get along with, and girls that have bad to no relationships with their dad tend to be extremely difficult to be with.

She even talked about how nurturing I was, like caring for abandoned injured animals, giving my coat to her when she was cold, making myself freeze, and, how I was the only guy that ever made her cum.

Oh, it’s good dick. That’s what she’s basically saying. And women like that. They’ll stick around for a guy that they’re not that into. If it’s good dick. If he’s good in bed, they’ll continue hooking up.

Now, here’s the funny part, this college is tiny. There are only three tables in the dining area. My sister was sitting at another table and overheard the entire conversation.

So I assume it’s the conversation between his ex and the girl that blew him off.

That same night, just a few hours after my sister told me everything about what she heard.

Your sister sounds like she’s awesome.

I got a text from Jane at around 11 p.m.

Oh, what a coinkydink. See how that works? I’m not feeling it. To text it at 11 p.m. because now the wheels are turning.

I didn’t open the message and was planning on doing so the next afternoon. The next day, at lunch, Vanessa found out that Jane and I had gone on a date. She immediately tried to sabotage things and undo the positive image she had created.

So now his ex is like, oh wait, you dated my ex boyfriend? He’s like, oh, he’s terrible. You don’t want to date him.

She suddenly painted me as a “player”, which I’m not. She told Jane that I had dated a famous supermodel and a Porn star and slept with lots of hot girls that she said were hotter than Jane.

He’s went out with girls that are way hotter than you.

Basically trying to intimidate her with “competition” and make me seem untrustworthy.

Well, obviously that has the opposite effect. She’s trying to sabotage him, and all she ends up doing is making him look like a stud. He’s fucking a porn star. He’s the only guy that ever made her cum. Hmm. Interesting. Then she starts thinking, oh, maybe I judged him too harshly. I’d like some of that.

It is true that I did date that model, the Porn star and many other girls but I always treated them properly. I never ghosted anyone of them or lead anyone on. My sister told me all of this, and I honestly started to worry about how Jane might perceive me.

You shouldn’t dude. This is like fucking catnip. Jane is eating it up.

And I was also a little embarrassed that my sister found out about my sex life.

Well, at the end of the day, she’s your ambassador. She’s a great wingman or wing woman in this case.

But before I even had the chance to respond to Jane’s first message, she double-texted me with a long apology fearing I was going to ghost her.

Ah, look at that. See how that works? That’s called leverage. And he didn’t have to do anything. His reputation preceded him. So this is the difference between a guy who’s outgoing, who has a social circle. In this case, he’s got a sister is like his reputation precedes him. Whereas when you got a guy that doesn’t leave the house, he goes to work and then he comes home. I was talking to a guy a couple weeks ago, and he’s having a hard time meeting women.

And like the last three years, he’s had four dates. And so when I got to talking like, well, what do you do? He’s like, well, I go to work and then I go home because I’m trying to save money. And I got my purpose and this and that. And I was like, yeah, but what do you do socially? What do you do for fun? He’s like, he doesn’t have any friends. He doesn’t go out and do anything. He goes to work and he goes home and he goes to the gym and that’s it.

I was like, well, I mean, four dates in three years is like, that’s about a little over a date a year. That’s not very many. And then the other thing on top of that, he’s sitting home jerking off to porn every night. I was like, well, that’s why you don’t have any motivation to go out and meet girls, because you’re always relieving yourself of any of the tension that builds up.

You should be giving that sexual attention to women in the real world, not watching fake, you know, fantasy porn, basically, and then jerking off to it. It’s like, that’s why you don’t really have a social life and you have no motivation because, again, you’re constantly releasing every day. Instead of letting it build up, because then it builds up and you do it strategically because you should follow what’s in, “How men can have multiple orgasms”. So when you do go out on a date, you’re ready to lay the pipe properly.

Because if you go out on a date and you go and lay the pipe and you suck in bed, you’re not going to get another date. We’ve talked about this umpteen times in the podcast with the girls, and they all say the same thing because there’s guys in the comments are like, things are going great with this girl. We slept together and then I never heard from her again. She wouldn’t return my calls. I was like, well, you were terrible in bed, so you got to be ready to perform.

But other than that, you shouldn’t be jerking off every day or multiple times a day because you’re just gonna have no motivation to talk to or interact with women, especially if you’re smoking weed all day and not leaving the house. So you have to be a social person. And this guy obviously is socially, he’s getting out there and getting after it. And so his reputation precedes him. And he didn’t have to do anything for this to happen.

Vanessa’s attempt to sabotage me increased Jane’s attraction. To top it all off, that same day, Vanessa texted me trying to ask me out on a date.

So his ex is hitting on him because now his ex became even more interested because now she saw that he went out with Jane and despite the fact Jane blew him off. Now you’ve got two girls are competing. As the late, great Doc Love used to say “When kitty cats compete you win.”

Ironically, while trying to sabotage me, Vanessa ended up becoming my biggest wingman. Social proof really is everything. She depicted me as a kind-hearted, caring man in everyday life who could also take control in tough situations and rock a woman’s world in bed. The perfect balance.

Good job dude.

And to think, I almost texted Jane again earlier to try to persuade her to give me a second chance.

Come on, man, I told you not to do that. But you exercise self control even though you almost screwed it up. This is why I teach what I teach. Because it works. This is many, many decades of perfecting this stuff.

Thank God I didn’t. She did all the work for me. Thank you, Corey. Your work has given me the restraint I needed to do the right thing and not pursue after Jane rejected me. Now, as ecstatic as I am about all this, I also heard concerning things through my sister. Jane is still friends with her ex, who broke up with her three months ago.

That also could be part of the reason why she disappeared on you. Because she’s not over him and she’s probably still talking to him and hooking up. But at the end of the day, it’s her job to win you over, bro.

I also learned that Jane had been talking to another guy while we were talking but ultimately didn’t go on a date with him because she was still thinking about her ex. And because the guy seemed far less mature and driven than me. I’m 23, and he’s 19. She is also dealing with a very serious autoimmune disease and depression. What are your thoughts?

Well, it sounds like that girl’s got a truckload of problems. Easygoing, easy to get along with. Nice to you. Healthy. Takes care of herself. Sounds like she’s got a lot of stuff going on. But if she’s pursuing you, who are you to decline her for a date and not beat up her pelvis in bed properly? Because at the end of the day, even if you don’t date Jane long-term, you beat her pelvis up in bed, she’s going to be telling other girls about it. And who knows, maybe your future ex-girlfriend comes through that connection.

Good things happen. Good things happen when women love hooking up with you, and they walk away with a smile on their face. As you see here. This is why you don’t burn bridges. This is why you don’t piss in somebody’s Wheaties. You want women walking away thinking, “Man, what a great guy he was. I was really stupid and I fucked that up.”

How do you think this story would have differed if I had sent that text the day before?

She probably wouldn’t have even replied and her interest would have dropped even lower.

I think this is an important email to analyze for your viewers to highlight how important it is to stick to no contact and how much social proof can change your outcome. I am infinitely grateful for your work.

Warmest regards,

Bob

Well, congratulations dude. It’s a good problem to have and it’ll be interesting to see what comes of it. But this is the place you want to be, and you should be, because this is the experience of the way the popular kids are in school. They hook up with a hot cheerleader. Even if it doesn’t work out. She’s like, man, he was really good in bed. His dick was really big. Whatever happens to be. He was really cool. And then other girls are going to hear about that and then they’re going to seek you out.

Versus, oh, that guy was a real dickhead. He was terrible in bed. He had bad breath or whatever. He couldn’t get it up. Whatever happens to be so if it’s a sorority and the girl walks away saying, what an awesome man you are and how great you are in bed, she’s going to tell a bunch of her sorority sisters. And guess what? You’re going to be hooking up with some of the sorority sisters. It could be same thing, girls from the office or friends of the girls from the office.

It’s like when you have a good social network and you’re minimally competent and most importantly, you’re good in bed. That’s really great for you and your reputation and getting you other choices and other options. So good job on the self control and send us an email, let us know what happens if you give Jane lots of happy finishes. It’ll be an interesting story to continue or to be continued.

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