How To Tell If She Wants A Booty Call & When To Invite Her Over

How to tell if a girl you are dating wants a booty call and when you should invite her over.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who says he’s read 3% Man six times. This past weekend he ran into his ex-girlfriend. They hung out together for several hours and even went to an old romantic spot of theirs. She was very flirty and touchy. After she left she started messaging him about an hour later. It looks like she was looking for a booty call and DTF, but he seems to have missed the subtle cues that she was ready for the indoor Olympics.

It’s a good email that shows how a woman behaves and often changes her mind after initially saying she wanted to call it a night. It shows the power of giving a woman the freedom to stay or go and how this makes her more attracted to you.My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.

Well, this particular emails from a viewer, he says he’s read 3% Man six times so far. What’s interesting is he’s been dating and having some good success with the ladies in this past week, and he ran into his ex-girlfriend. So they ended up having kind of not really an instant date, but it was kind of it was just a hangout. So they ended up hanging out together for several hours. He invited her to go to this old romantic spot that they used to go together. Then she leaves, and I think he hung out for a little while longer.

What’s interesting about this, and the reason why I wanted to to do this in an email, because I read through his email and he just kind of missed some of the subtle cues, because about an hour or so after they part ways, she starts texting him and asking him if he is still there. So you think, “Well, why would she text him and say, ‘Hey, are you still there?'”

So there’s going to come times like this, is an ex-girlfriend, obviously, but what if it’s a girl you’ve been dating for a couple of weeks? Because I see guys sometimes get in this robotic state of, “Oh, it has to be in the form of a date.” At the end of the day, your job is to create an opportunity for sex to happen, to hang out, to have fun, to hook up. So at the end of their hanging out, she went her separate ways and he’s like, “I guess that’s the end of the evening.” At least that’s what he thought. That’s what he continued to think, even though she contacted him.

Judging by what she said in the context of their conversations, because women are not going to come right out and say, “Hey, I want to have sex,” or, “Hey, I want a booty call,” or, “Hey, I’m down to fuck,” or anything like that. Usually when you first start dating them, it’s only when they, and in this case it’s an ex girlfriend he hadn’t seen, I don’t know how long, but women are not going to be the ones to typically risk the rejection. It’s on you as the appointment setter, the salesman, if you will, to recognize that she’s open to hang out and spend more time together, because what you will notice is that women will change their mind.

Remember the Thich Nhat Hanh quote: “You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” In this case, he’s hanging out with this girl. Maybe they talked about or he invited her to come back to his place or whatever later, or to hang out later. Maybe he didn’t, but the point being is, there’s nothing else going on and there’s no any plans to meet later or anything, but assume that he’d say, “Hey, you want to come over later and you want to come have a glass of wine? I want to go head to my house, have a glass of wine or whatever, and catch up some more. Sit in the Jacuzzi, the hot tub,” or whatever it happens to be. “Watch a movie.” Maybe sometimes she says, “No, I got to get up early.” You get something like that. “All right, well, let me know if you change your mind,” and then you go your separate ways. An hour later, she’d be like, “Hey, what are you doing?” Or just, “Heyy.”

You got to assume because sometimes it’s just giving them the freedom when they’re like, “Oh, I got to do this, I get it.” You’re like, “OK, you’re cool with it.” Either way, you’re totally indifferent, because love is allowing, so you’re allowing for her to say, “Yeah, let’s go back to your place,” or to say, “No, I got to do this. I got to do that.” Then you’re like, “Hey, well, if you change your mind, let me know.” In this case, an hour or so later, she gets in touch and you’ll see when I go through the email here that there’s some hints there that he probably could have just said, “Hey, come over.”

So the question is like, when do you do that? When do you just invite a girl over? When is she just calling to say, “Hey,” when is she calling you? Because she’s hoping you’ll invite her over. Remember, as the book says, if a woman’s reaching out to you or texting you, you got to assume she wants to see you. So don’t be a robot and say, “Oh, I cannot see her again until I set a whole date and do this grand gesture thing three or four days from now. I must be a robot.”

Now, if you just hung out and you hung out at your old romantic spot in an hour or so later, she’s calling you to ask you if you’re still there, or see if you’re still there or where you’re at and what you’re doing, you should assume she probably would like to get together and hang out some more. So you invite her over, and if she says no, he’s like, “All right, if you change your mind, let me know.” Oftentimes you’ll see the women go, “No, I don’t want to do it. I am going to get to bed. I’m going to get some rest.” An hour later, “Hey, what are you doing? Can’t get to sleep. I wanted to hear your voice.” “Get your cute little ass over here. Come snuggle with me,” and just invite her over. She said, “Well, I got to get up early for work.” “Well, bring your work clothes, and in the morning you can get dressed in my place and leave from my house.”

You have to be, because it’s like this is part of sales. So the objection is, “Oh, I got to get up early,” and your job is a man to go, “Oh, this is this big problem. It’s no big deal. Just bring a change of clothes over and you can take a shower and get dressed in my place in the morning. I’ll see you in a bit. Got to go. Bye.” Hang up on her or whatever.

The point being is that sometimes they’re going to say they don’t want to hang out in an hour or two later, they’re going to be reaching back out. You’ve got to pay attention to those little cues, because remember, if she’s chasing you, she’s pursuing you, she probably wants to see you more. In this case, it’s not just, “Hey, I had a good time catching up tonight.” It’s like, “What are you doing? Are you still there?” Because sometimes women will ask if you’re still there and you are, they’ll turn around and then come back to where you’re at. Or maybe they were hanging out with another friend or something, or she went home and then she’s like, “Oh, I’d like to spend more time with them.” Then she sees, “Oh yeah, I’m still here. Come on over.”

You come over and hang out. You make out, it’s like, “Hey, let’s go back to my place.” So just things to be aware of.

Viewer’s Email:

Hey Coach Corey Wayne,

I read your book at least a half dozen times.  It really works for me, and I was telling guys about it during my last trip to la la land in August, lol.

I met a few gals there and had a good time.  I did hook up with one girl for a few weeks but ended it as soon as left.  Not going down the same path as last time.

This past weekend I ran into my ex-girlfriend.  We talked for a bit, and she invited me to sit down next to her. 

Interesting.

We ended up having a great night together dancing and hanging out.  She asked me about my girlfriend or if I had one…

Women ask you about who you’re involved with or if you’re dating anybody, it’s because they want to know if you’re single and available. So that’s a good sign that shows interest. I don’t know what their history is. He never said anything about it. It was just random. Boom! I ran into my ex girlfriend tonight.

…And I told her no, that ended a while back lol.

Meaning that he broke up with his other girlfriend.

She got pretty flirty and hands on with me that night.  Before the night ended, I suggested we go to our spot, where we first met, and watch the Niner football game the next day. She came and we had a great time. 

So he made a date basically.

Before she left, I asked her if she was going back to Powerhouse next weekend. 

I don’t know what that is. Could be a nightclub. Could be a gym. I don’t know.

She replied, “Probably.” 

So maybe that was the restaurant or where he ran into her or something.

So, I told her, “OK cool, maybe I will see you then.” About an hour later she texts me again asking if I was still there lol. I told her no, I was home watching the end of the game. I thought she was checking up on me lol. Then later that evening she sent me some photos telling me about what she was having for dinner and wished I was having a nice evening.

I would have just said this is later in the evening and it’s like if a girl is texting you at night, you’re like she’s down to fuck, she wants to get together. In this case, because xanax, she’s not going to typically go out of her way to do that.

So as a man, you’ve got to be the guy to pick up on that, as soon as she texted me saying, “Hey, are you still there? I would say, “No, I’m at home. You should come over,” just like that. Or you could just say, “No, I’m at home. Come over.” That’s all you got to say. Nine times out of 10, she’ll like, “OK.” If she throws you. “Oh, I got to get up early,” then, “Well, bring a change of clothes and stuff and you can get ready here in the morning.” See what she says.

Sometimes you go, “No, I’m going to get to sleep.” “All right, well, let me know if you change your mind.” 20 minutes later, “Hey, I’m coming over.” That’s typically how it works. I know it drives most guys crazy. Like that makes no sense. She said yes. She said no. She went back and forth, and then she went to come over. They’re just like that. They’re indecisive.

That’s feminine energy. It’s chaos. It doesn’t make any sense. It’s just you got to let them be. They could stay. They can go. You’d love to have them, but if they don’t want to be there, that’s OK too. It’s OK if they change your mind.

I just replied with “Wow look yum! Enjoy,” yummy emoji.  Kept it simple and did not send anymore text messages. 

I would have invited her over. That was a missed opportunity, dude, because she texted you twice. She was asking you what you were doing for dinner. If you were still at the event, she’s wanting to know where you’re at. It’s twice in an evening. It’s obvious that she probably wanted to spend more time with you.

I did send her a good morning picture Monday morning and she replied a few hours later with a thank you and wished me a good day with positive vibes.

More than likely, this girl will probably get back in touch because it’s actually going to be very attractive to her. The fact that he didn’t do anything…

Because her and I dated on and off a few times over the years I’m keeping this really cool.  Not over pursuing or texting. 

Well, I don’t know what had happened or why it didn’t work out. This is somebody from the past. It’s because they did and said so many things that were unattractive and turned the girl off to where she just didn’t want to see him anymore, and she had lost attraction for him and times gone by or whatever, she runs into him and obviously he’s a different type of dude and she’s having to do most of the pursuing, and it’s his inaction that is attractive to him.

Like I said, you got to pay attention to these things and and be aware that women are going to change their minds even if they say, “No, I’m going to go home wherever there’s a good chance if they’re contacting you in an hour or so later and then you invite them over, they still tell you no and you’re like, “Hey, let me know if you change your mind.” Then 20 minutes later, “Hey, I’m on my way.” That’s what you’ll get. “Can’t wait to see you.” You’ll get that.

Keep her guessing and wondering about how I feel or what I am doing. 

I mean, yeah, it totally can work to your advantage. I’m just saying, from my perspective, being the elder statesman in this type of interaction, I think she was down to fuck. I think she wanted you to invite her over.

I was thinking about what you said in your book and videos about ex-girlfriends. I’m not planning to send her anymore text for the remainder of the week.  I will go to Powerhouse on Saturday night only.  Not telling her I’m going, just show up unannounced.  

So I guess it must be some kind of place to hang out or bar or club or something.

Thanks again for writing “How to be a 3% Man” and what you are doing to help readers.

Alpha Male all the way!!

Bob

Well, like I was saying earlier, it was a missed opportunity there. The fact that you’re making her wait, I wrote about it in my book. I don’t want to name any names to protect the innocent, but I’ve had girlfriends that I slept with right away, and there’s others that I made them wait. It’s your discretion, but she was ready to get to get together that night and hook up.

In my opinion, based on what she said now, it doesn’t mean you screwed up or you’re not going to hear from her in the future. It can work to your advantage, because remember, it’s a scientific fact that women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. At this point, you reached out, you sent her a meme or whatever, but if she was the one that blew you off then and why you stopped dating because she didn’t want to continue, then yeah, you got to let her do all the calling, texting and pursuing from here on out. Next time you hear from her, assume she wants to see you. Invite her over to make dinner together.

Just follow right out of what’s in the 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back. Again, he didn’t provide any information on what their relationship was like in the past or why they’re not together anymore. I suspect just because most of the people that are watching me, they’ve come to me because they got blown off to the point where the girl is like, “I’m not interested anymore.” They have just strictly platonic feelings towards him, and I work to help them turn that around.

This is like a simple thing, little subtle difference that makes a difference where you could have had a nice, magical night of the indoor Olympics at his house because she reached out to him, but instead he got to hang out with Rosie and her five friends, Rosie Palms and her five friends.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.