Memes, Messages, No Contact & The Best Strategy To Get An Ex Back

What memes & messages mean when using no contact and the best strategy to get an ex back.

In this video coaching newsletter I discuss 2 different emails from 2 different viewers. The 1st email is from a viewer who is on his 9th read of 3% Man and he says he’s confused on how to proceed with the best strategy to get an ex back after he got dumped. He thinks he may have been too much of a cold fish in their meme and message exchanges. The 2nd email is from a viewer who got dumped 8 months ago and has been in no contact ever since. He read my book 30 times and was ready when she got back in touch. He set a definite date and they hooked up. Things look good, but he wants to make sure he’s doing things correctly going forward. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the bodies of their emails.

Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter. And the topic of today’s newsletter is going to be, Memes, Messages, No Contact, & The Best Strategy To Get An Ex Back.

Well, this particular email, I got two different emails that I’m going to go through with you. The first guy, he says he’s on his ninth read of 3% Man, and says he’s confused on how to proceed with the best strategy to get an ex back after he got dumped. He says he thinks he may have been too much of a cold fish in their memes and message exchanges.

And so, then the second email is a guy he got dumped about eight months ago. And so, you get a good contrast. You get a guy that’s like in the middle. I think he might be new to my work. And so, he’s going through The Book because he wants to turn things around.

And then I got a second email from a guy that got dumped eight months ago, says he went through 3% Man 30 times. And so, when his ex got back in touch, he was ready. He was prepared.

And as Confucius says or said, I should say, success depends said a long time ago as a matter of fact. “Success depends upon prior preparation and without said preparation there is sure to be failure.” So, this guy got prepared. And so, she got back in touch. He knew what to do. He understood 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back.

So, he created an opportunity for sex to happen. He hung out, he had fun, and he hooked up. So, he’s pretty excited, obviously. But he sends in his email on his situation because he just wants to make sure he’s continuing to do things right going forward.

And so, you got one guy who’s just got dumped, and then you got the second guy who’s where the first guy is hoping to be someday. So, you get a good contrast there.

1^st Viewer’s Email:

Hello Coach,

I have read The Book 8 times and currently on my 9th read. I am a bit confused on how to proceed with the best strategy to get an ex back. Me and my girlfriend of six years broke up in May 2023.

So, we’re talking seven months ago at this point. So, one month later than the second email-er.

All the signs were there that she was going to break up with me, but I rationalized all the signs as her just being busy with her new job.

Yeah, because to admit the signs are there. What does that mean? It means you fucked up. It means you got to take ownership for things that don’t feel good to take ownership on. And so, it’s much easier to blame somebody else to just pretend that you didn’t see what you just saw.

To pretend that the turd in the punchbowl is not actually a turd. It’s hey, it’s just a, um, it’s a nice candy bar, floating around in the punchbowl, even though we know it’s a turd.

I wasn’t dating and courting her properly, was going through a hard time and was off of my center because of it.

Yep. I just did a video newsletter that came out. I think it was the one right before this where the guy was a fireman. Read my book a bunch of times seven years ago, attracted a woman of his dreams, but life got in the way.

He got sidetracked. He lost his job, flailed around, was depressed for a year, didn’t do anything to help himself. And eventually his wife had enough, and left and filed for divorce. And now he’s like, how do I get her back? And it’s like you get on average, about 6 to 12 months to flail around and not take care of yourself.

Because if you’re the leader in the head of your household and then you just tap out and go, life’s too hard, I can’t do this. I’m going to just lay around and treat my girlfriend and my wife like my mommy. You get about 6 to 12 months of doing that, and then she’s going to be, “Pfft.” Because you’re supposed to have more masculinity than she does.

And so, if you’re going through a tough time, you got to get your shit together. You still got to take care of your body. You still got to work out. You still got to exercise. You still got to eat healthy, because you need your health. In order to be maximally efficient at everything you need to do in life.

And if you’re going through a tough time, it’s like, quite frankly, women don’t give a fuck. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps. They’re not supposed to be the man. You’re supposed to be the strong one.

You can’t lean on your girl and make her and your mommy, and think that she’s going to stick around, and want to sleep with you and have sex with you, and potentially risk getting pregnant by a guy who’s going, “I can’t help myself, mommy, be my mommy.” You just can’t do it. They’re not there for that. Don’t make your girlfriend or your wife your mommy if you want them to stick around.

I didn’t beg or plead at all, I just told her that I love her so much and just want her to be happy. I made it clear that I didn’t want to be only friends and I can’t see her as only a friend. She moved out, I went into no contact and at the end of June (06/24.)

As a matter of fact. So, about a month later.

She reached back out. I successfully applied the best strategy to get an ex back. We had 3 dates at my place.

We’ll you should be also following 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back.

We had 3 dates at my place. We hung out, had fun, and hooked up all three times. Then I picked her up for a 4th date and we did the same. At the end of the date, she told me that things were about to pick up at work and she wasn’t going to be very available for the coming months.

From there, two times she reached out, I’d try to set a date, but she said we’d have to play it by ear because her schedule has been crazy. This went on for 3 weeks.

So, when a woman starts going, “Schedules crazy, it’s crazy.” What that tells me is her interest is now dropped again. Her attraction went down, for whatever reason. And typically, what happens is a guy gets dopey. He starts to pursue too much, but at the end of the day, it sounds like he did what he was supposed to, which is letting her reach out.

But she only reached out two times, and she wouldn’t set a date. So therefore, what do you do at that point? When she reaches out, you don’t bring up getting together, unless she brings it up first.

Because either he turned her off or there was some other dude that she was hooking up with for her to just hook up three times in a row like that, and then the after the fourth just flip. He either did something really unattractive or a series of unattractive things, or she was already fucking somebody else.

I think this is where I messed up. I saw this as a sign of low interest, so I backed off from our group chats where we’d send memes back and forth. If she sent five memes, I’d send one or two max. When I thought she was losing interest I stopped interacting all together and continued going about my business.

I don’t know if that meant he ignored her, or what? He’s not real clear.

One week later she reached out and said she could have me over on Sunday. I said maybe, I didn’t set a definite date because we wouldn’t be able to hook up at her place since she lives with a friend.

Well, it’s your duty. It’s right out of The Book. Be direct. Be decisive. Get right to the point. You got to remember what happened. You were flailing and going through a difficult time. So, you stopped being the leader in the relationship.

And so, you had four good dates. And then she backed off, and then she came forward. And what happened? You went right back to displaying incompetent behavior like he didn’t know what to do. And so, what does that do? That causes her to feel like she can’t trust your masculine core and she loses interest.

On Sunday I decided to cancel, she said she still wanted to do a call to catch up. I was distant and responded, “You know where to find me when you’re ready for that.” She sent hearts in response and from there I didn’t hear back from her. One month went by and I noticed she removed our photos from her social media.

Then another month went by, and she reached out right before thanksgiving. She said she made food and wanted to bring me some. She came by Saturday November 25, I thought we were just going to pick up where we left off.

I tried to kiss her when I saw her, and she gave me the cheek. She came into my apartment and at the beginning she told me that she wanted to catch up but not do anything.

Well, when she says that, you say, “Hey, look, I told you when we broke up. I’m not interested in just being platonic friends. So, if you’re just here to be my pal, then I’m going to pass. But if you’re here because you miss me and you want a little kissy poo, I’d love to hang out.”

And if she says, “Well, I’m just interested in being friends”, I was like, well then, “Hey, I appreciate you stopping by. Thanks for the leftovers. If you change your mind, please get in touch. I’d love to see you, but I’m not going to just be your platonic friend or be your gay male girlfriend. That doesn’t work.”

We chatted for about an hour till she said she had to go. I walked her down to her car and I went for the kiss again and she gave me the cheek. I made the mistake of messaging her the next morning and telling her that I hope she doesn’t think that I haven’t wanted to see her this whole time.

She knows.

This is the first time I’ve initiated contact since the breakup.

You shouldn’t be doing that.

She said, “of course not.” We sent a few loving messages back and forth and left it at that. For the next couple days, I noticed that she was liking and hearting my Facebook stories then suddenly it stopped. She no longer views my stories at all.

Obviously on purpose. Again, when you see this kind of behavior and she turns her cheek, probably because she’s fucking somebody else, and the reason why she probably came back is because that new guy she was fucking is probably not looking so good. Because that’s when, you know, she shows up around Thanksgiving.

It’s now Wednesday 12/6/23.

This email was originally sent in first week of December.

And I haven’t heard from her. Was I too much of a cold fish?

Maybe. But you know, like I said, I pointed out that one time where you didn’t make a date. You were just kind of, “Oh, what do I do?” And that was what got you dumped because you went through a long extended period of time where you flailed around as a man and weren’t the leader.

And then when she started coming back, you were direct, decisive. You got the point. You made dates. You hooked up like four times in a row, and then the fifth time you’re like, oh, what do I do? You gave her a maybe date. You just went again, right back to displaying incompetent behavior, unsure of yourself not being direct and decisive and making a date.

You just left it up in the air. And she lost interest because you stopped being a leader. And as soon as you start displaying that lack of leadership ability, it triggers those feelings all over again and turns her off. And then it really looks like there’s another guy that she’s hooking up with.

Cause even still, even with that, those minimal mistakes that you made. She should have still come back, but the fact that she just dipped so quickly like that tells me that she was fucking somebody else. And probably because she stayed with you, like most women do, to the point where her feelings were pretty much gone.

Is there still a chance at salvaging this? Where did I go wrong?

Well, just where I pointed it out. But you know, typically what happens with memes and messages is that all those things are direct messages to you. And you use those as opportunities to set the next date. But if you notice what happened, he did three dates in a row and then he picked her up.

I don’t know if that meant he started calling her and pursuing her, which is not what you do according to 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back. Because if she dumped you, she’s got to fix it. She’s got to do all the calling, texting and pursuing. But it was like after that fourth date when he went and picked her up, they had a good date, but then she became kind of cold and distant.

So, something happened there that caused her to lose interest. And it also could have been Chad Thunder Cock in the background that was working on her and making progress. Maybe that fourth date. He displayed a lot of unattractive behavior. I don’t know what it was.

But the next time, that’s where things just totally went sideways, and he didn’t make a date because he displayed incompetent behavior. He wasn’t certain. He wasn’t certain he knew what he wanted. And basically, acted the same way he did that caused her to dump him.

And if her interest was already low at that point, and there was a brand new guy that was doing everything right, and then, you know, she disappeared for like 4 or 5 months, whatever it was, and then came back around Thanksgiving. But, you know, now she’s giving him the cheek.

What that tells me, is she’s having sex with somebody else. And that’s why she gave him the cheek. But now she definitely knows that she could bounce back to him if she wanted to. And usually what that’s indicative of is that things are not going well with the other guy, and the future is in doubt.

So, she’s just coming around to see what the possibilities are that she could get potentially back together with this guy. And so, at this point, if she reaches out, then again, you got to reiterate, “Hey, I’d love to see you, but, you know, last time we were together, you gave me the cheek. And you told me right when you got there, you weren’t interested in anything.”

And it’s like, “As I told you when we broke up, I’m not going to be your platonic friend. So, if you’re calling me because you want to get together and you miss me and you want to see me, I’d love to see you too. But if you’re just calling because you want to be my buddy and my pal, and friends only.” It’s like, “I’m not interested.” And then get her to tell you what it is.

If she says, “No, I’m open to it. I’m open to reconciliation. I’m open to going out on a date and seeing what happens.” Like, okay, then make a date. And then but you’re right back to where you started, where she’s got to come to your place for at least three dates in a row.

And then you hang out, you have fun, you hook up. But she’s got to do 100% of the pursuing. Just because you hook up three times in a row doesn’t mean you start pursuing her again. You have to let her come to you. And so, typically for a guy, just one last thing I want to say about memes and messages. Is that if a girl that you broke up with starts sending you memes or messages that she’s trying to create conversation, and it’s up to you to make a date.

Thank you, coach, I appreciate your wisdom.

Bob

So, let’s go through the second email. So, this guy is kind of broke up about a month before. And she just came back recently.

2^nd Viewer’s Email:

Hi Coach, 

I’ve had my ex contact me after 8 months no contact, we broke up essentially because I was acting beta, needy and not masculine which I only realized in hindsight. We met on tinder and were together for 5 months before the breakup. I’ve listened to Your Book well over 30 times in the last 6 months on Audible and watched countless videos of yours including 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back.

Yeah, that would be the most important one. The one that’s most detailed with the strategy. I think the first one, best strategy to get an Ex Back was one of the original ones I wrote, and I later did the 7 Principles To Get An Ex Back, one with a lot more detail. Because it’s, the whole plan, comprehensive plan to go no contact.

Because the reason you’re going no contact is that she doesn’t want a relationship with you. And so, therefore you’re at a negotiating table and you can’t come to terms. Then you leave and you just say, “Hey let me know if you change your mind.” And then if she reaches out, you assume she changed her mind and then you make a date.

She initially contacted me saying that she had an item of mine and whether I wanted it or not. I responded to her in a light manner, and she came over to my place and we done the 3 H’s (hang out, have fun, hook up) as you instruct.

He hung out. He had fun while they were hanging out, and then he hooked up when the signs were there that she was ready to be touched and kissed. This is what happens when you read The Book 30 times. You’re ready.

Everything was lighthearted and I acted non-needy and played everything cool, we kissed after a few hours and then hooked up. It was early hours in the night, so she got an Uber back to hers and didn’t stay the night, as she left, I said to give me a call/text soon.

It’s been over 24 hours with no contact from her, as you say multiple times women are like cats, I don’t plan on contacting her as I know she needs to be the one to reach out where I’ll then set up the next opportunity for sex to happen. Am I doing this correctly?

Perfect, dude. Exactly.

I’m not going to contact her as I don’t want someone who doesn’t want me, and she needs the one to be putting the effort in as I originally wanted it to work the first time around. 

Thanks,

Bob

Yeah, she messed it up, so therefore it’s 100% on her to fix it. And so, that’s why when she starts coming back and you make dates, that you have to let her do 100% of the pursuing. It sounds like the guy in the first email, after the three dates at his house, started calling and texting her, and then she became less interested.

And then the next time she came back, he was just, you know, he gave her a maybe date. He didn’t make definite plans. He left it up in the air. And probably triggered the same feelings that led to her dumping the first time around. And plus with another guy in the picture, that’s doing mostly everything right, it’s easy to see that she’ll bounce right back to the other guy.

And that’s why she disappeared for so long. But then she started coming back, and the fact she turned her head, shows that she’s sleeping with somebody else, and doesn’t feel comfortable doing any intimacy. But she was there just to see if he was open to it.

So, that tells me even though the first guy had messed up, he still has an opportunity to fix it if he wants because she’s still reaching out to him. So, like the second guy here, I mean, he’s doing everything right. He knows The Book. It’s like, this is the same process. And once you get past the three dates, then you can pick her up and start dating like you normally did.

But you have to let her do the pursuing. And then when you hear from her, then you make the next date. Where guys go wrong in those situations is, once they start hooking up again, then they get excited, and they get anxious. They get a little dopey sometimes because, “Hey, my girl is back.” And then they try to force things a little bit, and then they start calling and texting.

And what happens is, as they call and text more, the girl starts backing off. And then she starts, giving wishy washy answers about making appointments like the first email I went over. That’s what the woman started doing. She was pretty into it. And then something happened where she became kind of, “Oh, I’m going to be busy. I got this; I got that going on.” So, it really looks like there was something that he did and said, the first email-er, that started turning her off. And then there was another guy that she bounced to. If I was a betting man, that’s what I would bet.

So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.