How the process of re-attraction works, so you can get your ex back or re-attract a woman you turned off or talked out of liking you.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email success story from a viewer who shares how my work helped him to move on and re-attract a total “10” after he found out his wife was cheating on him. When he first started dating this new woman, he hadn’t come across my work yet, but once she started backing away only a few weeks after telling him how great, satisfying and passionate their sex life was, he came across my videos.
He details how he changed his approach so he could re-attract her, despite the fact he had a really hard time letting go, walking away and resisting the temptation to contact her to force an interaction. It perfectly illustrates the subtle power dynamic between masculine and feminine energy and how to take your power back, so women feel attraction for you once again after they pushed you away. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
I will try to keep this short, but I felt compelled to write you and say thank you so much. Your advice has sent me on a path of self-improvement that has truly changed my life.
Last November, I found out my wife was cheating on me. It took me until July to finally get the balls to say we are not working this out, get your shit and leave. Shortly after this, I ran into an acquaintance that happened to be a complete knockout, a 10. This was before I had ever read or listened to any of your work. I am 35, and she is 25.
(The way I look at it, one of the reasons you’re attracted to this particular woman is because you’re supposed to be. It’s designed to be that way. If you didn’t feel attracted to somebody, you wouldn’t put in any effort or the time.
Most people never get to experience what it’s like to date somebody you feel that way for. Like most things in their life, they just settle and they go for whatever shows up, which usually ain’t much.)
My pickup skills have never been that great. And I am only an average-looking guy, so at the time I didn’t think I would have the ability to pick up someone as drop dead gorgeous as this girl. But I’ve always had a good sense of humor, and I easily made her laugh. This gave me confidence, and I noticed she had an attraction to me.
We started dating, and the sex was absolutely unbelievable. We would have sex 3 times every night, and she told me over and over how great she thought it was. We quickly fell in love. I absolutely thought the world of her and had a connection with her greater than anyone else ever in my life.
For the next couple months, it was absolute bliss, but like I said, I was not familiar with your work, and I completely put this girl on a pedestal.
(So you put her on a pedestal, started kissing her ass, treating her like a celebrity, and that always ends in a predictable result.)
I constantly told her how wonderful she was, treated her like a celebrity, and bought her gifts all the time.
(So instead of being a teammate and an equal, you basically started treating her like you just weren’t worthy, and eventually the woman is going to agree with you.)
Unknowingly at the time, my being an uber-pleaser was turning her off. Needless to say, I did not see the signs in time.
(Well, you’re not alone. Most guys don’t. That’s the reality.)
I also began pursuing even harder when I noticed her backing off, and I tried to show her how much I loved her constantly. I know now, come on man! LOL
(Yeah, because that’s what you see in TV and movies all the time. You’ve got to prove yourself to her. You’ve got to prove how much you care about her and want her. Sometimes women will even say that. Then the guy goes and does it, and the woman goes, “I’m just not feeling it. There’s no chemistry, no spark. Something’s missing.”)
Like so many other listeners of yours, this is what led me to find your work. I had a very difficult time completely walking away.
(It’s not easy when you’ve sold yourself already, and you’re the easiest person to sell, especially when emotions are involved.)
Every ten days or so, I would crack and comment on her Snapchat story or a Facebook post or whatever.
(You were still pursuing, still trying to force some kind of interaction, hoping she’d take that and invite you into her secret world with her.)
She would usually respond back with a short reply.
(In other words, bored, disinterested and predictable, because quite frankly, it’s how most guys act that she interacts with.)
And then I would usually ask her to meet up for coffee or something, like a little bitch. She would not ever reply to this text.
I kept reading your book and decided to go all-in and just follow what you said.
(Yeah, because you’re chasing after somebody who’s already pushed you away. You’re waiting a few days, figuring things are going to change, but the reality is, she’s blowing you off. She unilaterally decided you just weren’t good enough in her book. She wasn’t attracted to you enough. And scarcity is what creates value.
If somebody takes you for grated, you let them go and then you walk away. If you never hear from them, then obviously you know where you stand. But if you do, then you’ve got a chance, because if the woman is the one who unilaterally ends the dating or the relationship, or puts you in friend zone, it was her idea. Therefore, it has to be her idea to rekindle things.)
I took her off my friends list on Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram. I cut out all contact.
(Well, I don’t recommend to just push them off your social media, but I know for some guys it’s hard. They just want to do the complete break and say fuck it. The idea is you’re letting go and you’re walking away, but you’re leaving the door open in case she changes her mind, because it often happens when there’s still some level of attraction there.
If you go away and unfriend her, it’s like you’re mad at her. But if you leave her friended, it’s like you don’t care, you’re indifferent one way or another. Then if she has interest, great. If not, whatever.)
When she would comment on something I posted, I would not like it or even respond.
Fast forward to 2 weeks after removing all contact, and she is now texting me little flirty things every day.
(Isn’t is so amazing how simple that is? A few days, a few weeks you do nothing, then all of a sudden she’s like “Hey!”)
She says she wants to come over to get her coffee mug. I know, yeah right, she really wants that mug back, LOL.
(That’s why women leave things at your place. It gives them a strategic reason to call you when they really want to spend some time with you and or see where you’re at, but they can use that as an excuse.)
So she’s going to come over and make dinner and have some wine with me. I’m pretty sure we will be completing some indoor Olympics.
Bottom line though, I just want to thank you so much, because even if it doesn’t work out with her, I am dating other girls as well. What led me to your work was wanting to get her back and that alone. But it took on so much more. I decided I wanted to make myself a better person and really get to know what made me tick. I feel like I’m twice the man I was before I started this journey, and I owe you a great debt for that.
Thanks again. Love your work,
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
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