Walking Away To Get Her Back

May 19, 2012 by Coach Corey Wayne

The proper way to walk away from a woman after a breakup so she starts chasing & wanting you back again. When a woman you are dating decides to unilaterally change the terms of your relationship by either breaking up with you or telling you she only wants to be friends from now on, the only way to get her back is to communicate you’re not interested in the new terms she’s offering, tell her to call you if she changes her mind and walk away and never look back. It’s simply standing up for yourself and what you want. To stick around while putting up with relationship terms that are not to your liking in the hopes that she will change her mind, is weak and non-manly behavior. Men who put up with these situations have become submissive to the woman, and therefore, since they act like a woman, they will only be considered a male girlfriend. The following is an e-mail from a reader who used my advice for getting an ex back by stating what he wanted, but not backing it up with actions. Men in these situations think that by just throwing words at a woman will get her to do what they want. This never will work because their words and actions are not congruent. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:

Hi Corey

First off, thanks for the brilliant advice. (It only will help you if you actually follow it instead of cherry picking parts, or things to say, but not altering your approach in any way overall.) To cut a long story short, this is my attempt at rekindling a romance that I royally fucked up because of ignorance. Please let me know what you make of her responses. The day after these messages, we spoke for five hours on skype. (What? The phone/skype/email/texting/messaging/etc. is for setting appointments, not spending 5 hours chatting, but spending no time together physically.) Silly I know, I’m better now. (You may feel better, but you’ve done nothing to help your case by chatting for five hours on skype. You’re cherry picking my advice; this leads to failure.) I haven’t contacted her for 5 days and when I do it will be to set up a definite date. (When you walk away from a woman who breaks up with you and puts you in friends zone, you don’t continue to call and pursue her!!!! Duh!!! You’re saying you’re walking away because you don’t like the new terms she is offering for your relationship, but then you continue to chase her like nothing has happened. That makes you look weak and incongruent with your words. You’ll still get rejected as your approach has not changed at all. Women are attracted to men who say what they mean, and mean what they say.)

Me: “Look, I adore you and I’m really sorry for all the hurt and what I did to you, but if you’re not willing to work this out, there really is nothing to talk about. You know I love you. Let me know if you change your mind, but unless you want to pick up where we left off, I don’t want to talk to you anymore. I want to move on with my life. I’m not interested in being your friend. I’m interested in being your lover. As I said, let me know if you change your mind. This just doesn’t work for me. I’m out of here. I’m not into all this. It just does NOT work for me.” (You’re being redundant. This strategy to get an ex back is something you say, and then do. It is a statement of your purpose, that must be followed up with actions that are congruent with your words. Not something you say and it magically goes back to the way you want it. You don’t just throw words around and expect her panties to come off!!!)

Her: “It’s good to know that you at least recognize that you hurt me. Where we left off… you mean the situation where we would still be “sexbuddies” with the condition that we wouldn’t have to know each others lives, this way you would be my lover? or the situation where you treated me like a “dumbass” and then came running saying sorry because you forgot to put a smile at the end:O for example? (This tells me you have acted like a needy little jackass who has constantly chased and therefore turned her off.) Because if it is to go back to that, I rather prefer to stay the way we are now. I am really tired of you expecting me to forgive every single little “crisis” of yours, and then trying to excuse yourself some way!” (Translation: “I’m tired of you acting like a needy insecure jackass. I don’t think you mean what you say. Therefore, let’s just stay friends. Women bluff to test your strength. She bluffed, and you caved by blowing up her skype for five hours.”)

Me: “Wow, thanks for noticing, pointing out and reminding me bout all my bad points, I love you too :-)”

Her: “You’re lucky that I spoke in general, cause had I referred to all the bad points I’d never leave here :-)” (You should not contact her at all. Wait to hear from her then set up a definite date when she does call. If you’re too weak to do that, you will never get out of friends zone. You need to read my book ASAP and grow a set of balls. You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.)

Thanks,

Bob

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“The strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it.” ~ Michael Yon

Published on May 19, 2012

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. I just used your letter to her and she said then just move on because we have this same conversation everyday. What do I do.

  2. I was in a long distance relationship with a girl for a couple months then she choose to change the terms of the relationship because I was being lazy nd complacent but j did exactly what I wasn’t after the break of chasing nd begging (never works) so I said what you said do in a message on fb she immediately called I answered she asked where did this come from. She told me it was overwhelming nd that its not fair to keep me waiting because she wants to be able to love herself before she loves nd then she starts told me she still loves me nd things in that nature pretty much trying to bluff me back in the friend s zone so I tell her I love her adore her but how she expects me to b friend s nd to give me a call when she changes her mind she said okay! So I been going strong with no contact now 3 weeks 2 days

  3. Corey I have been with my angel I thought for a year. We agreed to get married. Four months ago I heart surgery and she was there. She now says I don’t listen to her so for me to leave. Five days ago she told e repeatedly she loved me and then all of a sudden she wants me to spend the nite, I go home, and the next day she says she doesn’t want me to stay since I didn’t when she ask, so I walk out an go home the next day she says its over an hangs upthe phone. I tell her it’s a mistakei love her an would do anything for her. But now she will not even answer the text or calls. Tonite she is gone from herhouse after not talking to me for five days and even after me goin to emergency room for pneumonia. I really thought she was sent from God and I told her Dailey. Is there a chance she will come back. Never have I loved a lady more and she told me the same. But she is gone now. She lives next to my ex wife an they don’t speak. I think I know your answer but let’s hear from an expert. She had a terrible childhood with a step mom. I Am at a loss as to what to do. Yes I will send u a comp.

  4. Corey Wayne is an unbelievable genius. I owe him so much. Without his advice I would never have got my woman back. I am going to put some $$$ in his tip box.

    I’m a 48 year old man and due to weak previous behavior in my 16 month relationship, acting needy and being too eager to please and being too available, my woman – also 48 – blew me off. I was so upset and felt devastated and cheated. I thought I was doing the right things for her, I was kind and caring and was a “nice” man. But following Corey’s work taught me that whilst I probably was “nice” in that sense, this behavior when taken to extreme demonstrates a complete lack of balls and sense of purpose on my part. It is also known as smothering and is very unattractive. She said she was confused and not sure we should be together and should be friends. For the first few days I accepted this whilst researching on the web about relationship problems and came across Corey Wayne.

    I followed Corey’s “walk away to get her back” principle to the letter. I told her I adored her, wanted to work it out etc but I was not going to be friend zoned, it was not what I wanted. I told her to contact me if she changed her mind and I walked away, fully prepared to never see her again. It hurts to do this, yes I cried in private, I felt the pain, I missed her, but this tactic simply must be followed because if you don’t and cave in to the “friends only” request, you’ll be seen forever as a weak bitch and will be forever in her power – until she blows you off again. Being a friend like this will never, ever work in getting her back.

    As I said, I walked away and told her never to contact me again unless she wanted me romantically. I told her I would ignore any texts from then on that did not clearly demonstrate her intent on getting back together. Two weeks later she started sending me “I miss you texts”. I ignored these for a few days and then I got “I’d love to talk to you and try to work it out” texts. These I responded to. I now have my woman back and have gained the power in the relationship as well. We are very happy and in love again.

    To anyone reading this article, going through something similar you MUST, MUST, MUST follow Corey’s advice here and out aside teh chasing notions that TV and movies try to get you to believe. Corey’s methods work.

  5. This is great information; however, we have two kids together. We are also young, and so financially intertwined. I want to continue to help each other as parents and financially, because neither of us can do life alone right now. We are both young, young students. And for our kids, we discussed still planning fun days every so often as a family. We feel that’s important for our kids to see that still. Ultimately, it’s important for me, and I’m sure for my kids, that their mom and I rekindle and get back together again, in a healthy, desirable way. Not just for them. What do I do!?

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