Why there is no substitute for winning, and how to cultivate a winning mindset, so you can accomplish your goals, dreams and reach your full potential.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email success story from a viewer who gives an update after quitting his job with nothing else lined up that I discussed in my previous newsletter titled, “I’ve Lost A Bit Of Drive That I Had.” He shares his mindset, how he prepared for his new job interviews, the strategies he used to get both jobs, and what he did and said that set him apart from any competition he may have had, so that he got offered the jobs instead.
How you can learn from and use what he shares to set yourself up to win big in the art of negotiation, job hunting and career advancement by cultivating an alpha mindset. My comments are in (bold parenthesis like this below) in the body of his email.
How’s it going Coach?
This is a follow up email from the 20-year-old Scotsman. In my last email, I described how I left my job with no plan of where to go next. Well, things have changed, and I’ve ended up in a far more solid position than I was in just one month ago. The job I thought held the key to a compelling mission and purpose didn’t cut it.
(That’s the important thing. You thought that might be great, and you went and worked at it. Then you realized it wasn’t what you thought.
There are a lot of people who go to college, get a degree and then get job in their field of study, and then realize, “This really sucks. I don’t see myself doing this for the rest of my life.” That’s why I’m an advocate for getting an internship or going out and shadowing somebody, talking to people who work in your industry, so you can see what it’s like before you spend that tremendous amount of money on an education to find out you really don’t like the work. The more research you can do up front, the better off you’re going to be.)
I wanted more responsibility and opportunity to be creative in a job, and I refused to settle.
(That’s the difference. You’re not willing to settle, and your not willing to sit around and tolerate mediocrity. Unfortunately, the majority of the people you’re around are in the mindset of settling. When they encounter somebody like you, who wants something more than what they have, it’s going to give them great comfort if they can share their limited world view or their story about why being mediocre is okay for them. And if they can get you to go along with it, you enable their mediocrity, and they bring you down to their level.
That’s why it’s so important to know what you want and why you want it. In other words, you have to have a really emotionally compelling reason why you want something. Without that, you’re not going to make the time investment or the effort to get what you want.)
Well, I certainly got out of my rut and pushed forward. I went out and got two jobs. One for a soft drinks start up and the other for a construction tech company, managing a part of their business. I followed the advice you gave in “How To Get Any Job You Want,” and believe me, I cruised into these two jobs.
(Well, when you follow what’s in that video, you’re going to be completely different than just about any job candidate that they’ve ever encountered. You’re going to act like a superstar because you’re going to be asking questions. People who are asking questions are people who have an abundance of jobs an abundance of opportunity, and they’re trying to determine which opportunity best suits them and their family.
People that are desperate for a job or begging for somebody to give them attention are going to be completely different. They’re going to have a scarcity vibe. They’re going to be full of fear. They’re going to be begging them for an interview, versus saying, “Well, tell me about your company. What’s it like there? Is it growing? Is it expanding? Is there opportunity for growth, for advancement?”
These are the kind of questions somebody who has a lot of opportunities is going to want to ask, because they don’t want to take a job that’s going to be a bullshit job. But somebody that’s broke and needs a job is not going to be asking those questions. Therefore, they’re not going to be able to distinguish themselves from every other person that’s sending in resumes.)
I dressed up for the part, put my best suit on, and got a shave. I’ve been hitting the gym and doing yoga too, so I looked GOOD in it and walked with confidence.
(Confidence is knowing what you know how to do and doing it really well. You felt good about yourself, you felt good about your options, and you were following the strategy you learned from yours truly, which obviously works really well.)
Before the interview, I prepped with info about the company and questions that I would ask the interviewer to get them engaged and liking me, and this worked beautifully.
(Why? Because everyone wants to feel good about where they work and feel they made a good decision, so when somebody starts asking questions, we all want to brag about ourselves. “Well of course. It’s a great place to work.” Instead of begging them for your time, you’ll be causing them to say, “Let me tell you why you should come work for us.” It’s a night and day difference.)
The interviewers were smiling at me, I was so comfortable, I was being humorous and just focusing on, are these the right people for me?
(That’s a perfect mindset.)
When I think back, I was even setting the times we would meet, “11:00 would be good for me.”
(The person asking the questions is the one in charge of the conversation. Great job dude.)
I prepared my mindset to be one of abundance.
(What’s abundance? In other words, you have lots of choices, and you have lots of options. You’re not going to be in a hurry to make a decision about anything because you need data, you need information, so you can make an informed, intelligent decision about who is going to get the gift of your time.)
I treated myself in my mind as someone who people were lining up to hire. I said to myself, “I’ve done this every day this week. I’ve never been bothered a day in my life,” and I slowed down my breathing to calm down.
(That’s another thing to focus on, your breath. If you feel nervous or rushed, you can take a nice pause and take it all in.)
I decided not to focus on failure. I shrugged off the possibility, “failure is the stepping stone to success.” I was feeling like an alpha male. No matter if it’s now or later, I will get what I want.
(In other words, success is inevitable. It’s simply a matter of time. You just simply have to do the repetitions. It’s pretty simple, and it’s a far superior mindset to somebody going, “I hope I get a job this week.”)
I asked questions of my interviewers, one was Spanish and the Spanish love basketball. I’d been reading Phil Jackson, so we talked about that.
(I assume you’re talking about Phil Jackson’s book, “Eleven Rings,” which is a must read for anybody who is serious about self-reliance.)
They basically told me at the interview I had the job, managing a side business of theirs. This is a huge opportunity for someone my age.
(Well, you completely set yourself apart and made them not even consider your age. It was irrelevant, because they were sitting in front of a superstar.)
My demeanor and growth from learning from you has led to so many compliments from my friends and family. The boss was saying, “You seem like a guy with your head screwed on.” Multiple friends have said to me separately, “How is it you end up doing all these interesting things and getting off-the-cuff jobs?”
(To people who don’t know any better, you’re just some dude that kind of floats through life, but the reality is you’re following a superior strategy and you’re getting results. To people who don’t know any better, it looks like fucking magic.)
My Mum even said to me, “You don’t realize how interesting you are.” All I do is live my own truth, ask myself what I want and look for what I’m passionate about.
(You’re following your curiosity, your heart and your intuition, seeing where it goes. And when you determine something sucks or it’s not as fun as it was in the beginning, it’s time to look for something else.)
One thing though is I heard my friends talking about their plans. It honestly breaks my heart a little. A few of them are thinking about settling for stacking shelves in the supermarket. I want to help them, but I also don’t want to get into their business, telling them what to do. Also, is it wrong to be slightly reluctant to give away my edge? What would you do?
(I would definitely tell them, but here’s the reality, even when you tell them what to do and what they could do differently, most of them are simply not going to do it. That’s the reality. They may know what they should do, but they don’t do it. They don’t have a compelling enough reason why.
Most people you encounter in this world are going to be mediocre and they’ll go out of their way to convince you why you need to be mediocre like them. Those people need to be ignored and they need to be resisted.
That is why it’s so important you decide ahead of time what is important to you. What does success mean to you? What does success look like? If you’re trying to measure success against the unreasonable expectations of other people, you’re going to be one fucking miserable dude. But if you have your own standard for success, you keep them and you achieve them, you’re going to be the one who derives internal happiness from that.)
Anyway, this is basically a thank you from me.
*Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. **Free with a new Audible.com membership
If you have a question you would like me to consider answering in a future Video Coaching Newsletter, you can send it (3-4 paragraphs/500 words max) to this email address: Questions@UnderstandingRelationships.com
If you feel I have added value to your life, you can show your appreciation by doing one of the following three things:
From my heart to yours,
Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
“Competence comes from a winning mindset, expectation of victory, relentless practice, refining one’s approach and taking consistent action towards creating the life and lifestyle you’ve always dreamed of. Everybody wants to win and succeed in life, but most are simply not willing to do what is necessary to make winning and success possible. The average person is average because they simply make average, half-hearted, inconsistent effort towards their grandest goals and dreams, without any real sustained focus or intent. Exceptional people are exceptional because of the little extra effort they make day in, and day out, to move their lives forward, no matter how close or how far they are from achieving their objectives.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne
Click Anywhere on Today’s Instagram Image Below & You’ll Be Taken To My Instagram Page. When you get to my Instagram page, click the “Follow” Button so you can follow me on Instagram. I upload several new Instagram photos per week.