Here’s why women can’t resist men who don’t chase and how this helps eliminate flakey behavior so they chase you instead. Society and men in general are constantly having dysfunctional and unhealthy ways of interacting with women drilled into their heads through TV, movies and the media. Guys are constantly told and brainwashed from the time they are young boys to chase and pursue women relentlessly until they throw in the towel and agree to date them. We literally over the decades become conditioned as men to believe we constantly have to be doing something to make a woman feel attraction for us and desire us. This actually interferes with a woman’s natural emotional process of opening up to receive a man mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. She feels attraction for him initially, but he acts so needy and clingy that she only feels like she wants to get away from him. When you act like the men on TV, movies and the media, you actually are acting like a creepy stalker who has no clue or sensory acuity of what women really want in a man, are attracted to or emotionally respond to. The following is an e-mail from a reader. He’s 56 and just recently got blown off by a sweet young 26-year-old hottie. He just found my work and is looking to use his new knowledge to try and woo her back again. She texted him recently about meeting up for drinks because she was coming to town. She never called when she said she would, and he wonders what his next move should be. My comments are (in bold brackets like this) in the body of his e-mail:
I’ve been following your videos for the last month or so. I wish I’d had this information a year ago. I am recently single after a 35 year relationship. I am 56. I am very goal oriented and once I got out on my own, I decided to build the life I always wanted. I got myself into great shape, went on a vegan diet, started jogging 4 miles a day and lost 40lbs. I also hired an image consultant and got myself looking good and updated my wardrobe. (Awesome man! Good job! It’s always worthwhile to invest in yourself. The better care you take care of yourself, the happier you will be. The happier you are, the more women will find you attractive, and the more they will work to get your attention in hopes that you will create a fun-filled romantic opportunity for sex to happen! Women are biologically driven to have sex with the most dominant males. Dominant males have strong genes that will mix good with her genes and produce strong offspring that can survive to adulthood and reproduce themselves, thereby perpetuating the family genes.)
Last September, I met a 26 yr old gal online with similar interests as myself: physical fitness, jogging, snowboarding, etc. It’s been sort of a long distance relationship as she lives 2 hrs from me. I mostly drive to her place 1-3 times a month. We exchanged lots of emails, text messages and Skyped quite a bit. She is a real fun-loving free spirited young woman and the hours spent with her felt like minutes. I fell hook line and sinker over her. (Translation: I started to act dopey and lost my center, thereby lowering her romantic desire and interest in me.) Everything started out pretty hot and heavy, and then she put me in the friends zone. (You were unprepared Grasshopper. However, with practice, you will become a Jedi Master with women soon enough!) She said she met someone locally and couldn’t date me any longer, but still wanted to be friends. I was crushed. When that happened I decided I didn’t want to be her male girlfriend and stopped communicating with her entirely. I didn’t tell her why at the time because I was just pissed and didn’t know how to handle it properly. (When a woman makes a unilateral decision to change the nature of your relationship without consulting you, and you don’t like the new terms she is offering, you can choose to walk away. “The strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away, and mean it.” ~ Michael Yon. Tell her to get in touch with you if things don’t work out, or if she changes her mind before you tell her… Hasta la vista baby! Then go looking for a woman who will give you what you want and learn from your mistakes. Be honest with yourself. Don’t bullshit yourself. By focusing on practicing what I teach with other women you encounter, if this chick comes back, you’ll be stronger, your skills, confidence and success will improve. Then, more confident and better equipped to always display your best self. She won’t be able to resist you if she still has interest level in you of at least the 50%+ range.)
After doing some research about attraction, I realized I suffered from “Nice-Guy-Itis” among other things. I can’t believe all the mistakes I made. Too many compliments, buying her gifts during Xmas, etc. (Christmas gifts are for girlfriends and wives.) Basically weak non-alpha male stuff. I feel foolish now and her dumping me was a huge blow to my ego. A couple of weeks ago I sent her a text message and opened up lines of communication again. I found out her boyfriend was out of the picture. Now that I have this new information to work with, I was really looking forward to seeing her and treating her the way of the Alpha male to see if I could get out of the friend zone with her. (Don’t chase. Chasing women guarantees rejection.) This Saturday she sent me a text about coming into town to visit some friends and asked if we could meet up for a drink or two. I said sure, ring me up. Well, I never heard a word from her all day. (Women bluff to test, in the past you would have been all over her when she did not call. Now you did nothing, unlike before. If she likes you, she will call again. You must OUTWAIT and OUTWIT women. Do nothing. You must give women the space to come and go as they please. You did a lot of weak things before. She’s going to test you a lot if she wants to, or is curious about coming back.) Looking back I should have acted like I already had plans, but that if she had a specific time we could meet, than maybe I could adjust my schedule instead of it being like I would be waiting for her call. (No, you don’t put your life and schedule on hold, or move it around for her. If you’re still free when and if she calls, cool, you’ll meet up. If not, maybe next time. Your actual response to her was fine. Why? She had been flakey before, and ditched you for someone else. If you were available when and if she actually would have called, you could have said yes and met up. If you would have made other plans and she called, you simply would have been unable to meet her. It’s her loss because she did not call you ahead of time, and by the time she did call, you were booked up.)
I think the thing that bothers me the most is how devastated I feel about being treated this way by her. (You got to let your failures go. You did not treat her properly, so she rejected you. This will help you get over a breakup. Immerse yourself in my book. You can download the Amazon Kindle version of my book to your Smartphone, PC, Mac or iPad in under 60 seconds for only $9.99 by CLICKING HERE to learn how to meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships.) At my age it shouldn’t be that big a deal. I guess I should have been out there trying to date lots of other women instead of just focusing on just this one. (Now, you’re talking!) Not sure what my next step should be at this point. I’m also thinking you can maybe help me with some of my business goals also. I have a very good business model and am considering expansion into other markets. (If you’re struggling in your personal life, I guarantee it’s affecting your business, work habits, and your ability to give your business the attention and focus it needs/deserves.)
Best phone is my cell ###-###-####. Here’s my Skype username which would be even better for me actually: ###########. We’re on Central time. I’m self employed, so I’m pretty flexible about a time to talk. (You can sign up for a phone coaching session with me personally by CLICKING HERE.)
I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks for your time.
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Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Coach, Entrepreneur
No one will ever do or say anything to you that you don’t invite them to do.